Anxiety Daily Check-In point #5

Quiet day, finally. Only have one appointment next week. Tried to call pnurse's office yesterday and it was closed for training.

Husband told me if I have to change my meds we're not doing anything to the house until I'm stable. He feels he won't be able to handle fixing up the house while I'm adjusting to meds. So I have to stay in a house I didn't want to begin with, and was abused by my ex in, until I get better. I get it but still...I told him if that's the case I want the ceilings fixed so I don't have to keep looking at the water damage. The roof is fixed and no more leaks so it can be done. And I will set up my home office again so I can use my desktop.

So I have been dealing with akathisia this morning and fussing a bit, but not much I can do at this point but try to chill. Doesn't help the anxiety much either.

It wasn’t too bad today. When I think about the incident at work I feel like throwing up. But when I don’t think about it I’m feeling fine.

yesterday was a high anxiety evening- short of it is, a lady near me is called angela, and sometimes when I know she's around it causes me flashbacks. she was around yesterday, and their was a time.. maybe a 15/ 20 minit time frame, where I just was lost in the flashback.

it's weird, I want to just walk up to her and say angela... you cause me flashbacks- and this is why you cause them, but who am I kidding

for starters, the reason she causes me flashbacks is embarrassing (or at least to me), and secondly, you don't just walk up to someone in the street and tell them " hey, you make me anxious".

I'm okay now.. maybe about a 5/10 on the anxiety sscale, but she's going to be here tonight so blah. just need to get through it I guess

Hmm lack of sleep and rest made this day pretty tough =w= My family/friends absolutely want me to go out with them but I just want to stay home and chill.. It's been two weeks since I haven't got proper rest.. Seriously, trying to balance studies, relationships and self-care is not easy

Awful. I went to theater today with a friend. Our conversation made me anxious. The movie was nice though.

Changed my supplements around to see if that would help with the side effects. Also kept busy with laundry. Didn't do too much else since it's hot outside and the house is heating up. I have a headache and some TD but seem to be okay otherwise. Still calling pnurse's office tomorrow, though.

I did do some rummaging around in my memento bin and took some stuff out. It's still heavy, but I moved some lighter stuff into another bin. The big one is heavy with yearbooks and photo albums, so that didn't change much.

May have to put off cleaning the house until Wednesday when it cools down some.

Anxiety is better.

Anxiety has been better the last two days. I think it's the medication I take for the migraines. I'm glad to feel a bit better now. It was too tiring.

Tomorrow work again.

what movie was it?

maybe something I'd want to watch too

no anxiety attacks today, but still feeling a little anxious because of my stomach pain

I just had a little bit of anxiety in the afternoon. I found a way to distract myself though.

I took an Ativan last night. That might of been why the anxiety was low today.

Still tension at home so I'm anxious, but hopefully it will resolve soon.

Spent most of the day with my parents so was mostly distracted. Trying to keep busy with chores but even some of those make me anxious.

Even though they are wonderful people, I'm super anxious about my guests coming. Social anxiety and general anxiety and anxious about being a good hostess. Hopefully that will be eased soon enough. Hopefully I can get some reassurance rather than get depressed again. I think I'm anxious about breaking down in front of them. *sigh*

Went for psychological testing today. Had a breakdown in the doctor office during the test and started crying. Still a little anxious about stomach pains.

Needing to know the difference between PTSD & Trauma? Are they not related? I started EMDR today using my 5-senses. I'm not sure how learning coping skills will give me relief from anxiety/panic attacks but basically my brain interprets stress as a threat...fight/flight mode. Whenever I get those signals of being threatened, I am to go to that happy place and allow whatever thoughts come to my mind go through and then focus back to my place of happiness. Does this really work? It is so easy for my husband to tell me just up my anxiety meds!

Trauma is an event or events. PTSD is a reaction to that event, or memories of that event or events.

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Been a quiet day, but I got a lot done. Got an appointment tomorrow with pnurse for the side effects. Got my CPAP supplies ordered. Bought some stuff to make iced espresso and black tea lemonade at home. Moved canned goods out of the garage (where it's blazing hot) to the kitchen. Helped husband set up the old portable AC unit to test run it before we put it upstairs in daughter's bedroom. Hopefully it will cool upstairs a bit.

Nervous about specialist appointment on Thursday. Nervous about pnurse appointment too. Just a big bundle of nerves at this point.

The hot weather is giving me some anxiety. I'm from the south and summer is already here

Have been coping with a virus for over a week now. The symptoms were mild at first, but disorienting. I was able to walk almost two miles to the store and back yesterday, but really needed to rest afterward.

Also had a grest conversation with my dad yesterday. I told him about my goal of becoming a counselor and working with environmental restortion. Baby steps for now, but he sounded enthusiastic and supportive.

Today I am having doubts about my ability to attain said goals, and questioning my motives for wanting to.

Was able to get some tasks done and enjoy outside time with my kids. I didn't gag and throw up when taking the rotten broccoli out of the fridge (yay!).

Thank you all for sharing. And thank you if you read this post.

Today is the day our first guests arrive. Still have some things to prepare. At the moment though anxiety is down. Got ahead of most things, so thats good. But we will see as the day progresses. I'll either wear down or energize up. Hopefully the latter, but not too much because I need to sleep tonight.

Anxiety is better today. Went to class in the afternoon. Still ruminating a lot and getting ill (some silly virus or something else infectious, nothing serious).

Was switched from Lautda to Trileptal. No anti-psychotic. This will be interesting because the APs helped keep my anxiety down. I will see if the non-med changes and coping skills will help.

Still nervous about ENT Thursday, but pnurse said even if I had surgery I wouldn't notice the pain that much. She doesn't know about my low pain threshold and requirement of high doses of NSAIDs to get through said pain.

Hoo boy. I'm just glad my list of duties for today is done.

My day wasn’t great, but no anxiety.

Well I slept most of the day but I'm not quite as anxious. I got and ate and took my meds( upped it to 225 mg of effexor xr, praying I dont have any side effects.

I think I overheard something today (something about a previous place I was abused)

I'd like to think it wasn't, and I just miss heard (it happens to me a lot), but still it's got me a little edgy

I don't think that was really the trigger though.. anxiety's been quite high all day, not sure what (if) anything particular started it.

Good news: new med is working so far. No akathisia.

Bad news: looks like our annual ant problem has become a lot worse. Exterminator is coming out to do initial treatment. That just sank our budget. Wish I knew that BEFORE I bought some new shorts.

I am anxious now about this house, and frustrated about yet another thing with it.

Not much anxiety. Just a bad headache and I'm ill.

was anxious today about my appointment with the endocronologist. Just thought that since I'd added more medications I'd complicate his progress (well, no real progress there that I know of. maybe its' subtle). Anyway, I was shaking through that. A bit of restlessness today.

But anyof that restlessness went away with the two boys that are visiting. They are wild childs (tried to rhyme there hehe) and they wore me out. Still a bit nervous around the adults (social anxiety), but they're super nice people, I just never know what to say.

So, made it through day 1 though.