Why don't I recognize the mania?

I went to my nurse practitioner last night and told her what I have been going through (no sleep, racing thoughts, not being able to get my thoughts out of my mouth fast enough causing me to interrupt everyone, etc) and she said, "and you never thought that you might be manic?" and I said, "well....no." because I just didn't. My husband said, "Oh...duh! I didn't think of it either! How could I not notice it?"

So, now I am in a new Sales job (normally, I HATE sales) because I feel like I can do anything and everything better than everyone. I give presentations in my training (I usually get too anxious which makes me sick) and I even confronted someone above me!!!!!

How can I not recognize it when it is so obvious? Well, it isn't as obvious to me as it "should" be to those around me it seems.

I know.....next is the fall, but I hate not knowing when!

I am usually the same way..someone has to point it out to me that I am manic. Then I go oooooohhhhhhhh so that is why I did this and that is why I did that.

Not sure why my brain wired that way.

Jan

Oh, I know I'm manic. I'm depressed like 98% of the time, so I know when the flip has switched. Didn't use to know it, like when I was extroverted in NY, but now I see it. It's been going on for 5 weeks now, and today is the most extreme of all.

Just look at my posting tonight! That's how I am with everyone and everything today. I jumped on the car while it was parked and rocked it up and down, danced all around and generally didn't give a crap how I looked all day because I was having so much fun. And I love calling people in this state. I have a phone phobia usually. I'm not drunk, but it feels like that in the sense of being uninhibited. All this to say, I TOTALLY RELATE.



Do we really have to fall? Seems like this will never end with the racing thoughts, forced speech, hyperactivity, extreme energy, insomnia, etc. I'm just so happy. I don't want to worry about the future.

Most people dont see what's happenign to them right away. Thats why its nice to have someone on the outside who understands who cant point things out for you. Its like temporary amnesia. I forget what I do sometimes even

i get a little denial going when i'm going manic," i feel good your the one with a problem". i tell myself when everyone around me is an idiot it might just be me.

OK, good (well so to speak)! I am glad I am not the only one. I feels better knowing that there are so many others that go through similar things. Maybe I need to be more aware of what I am feeling during the day or do a chart (I hate charts) to have a better idea if I am manic or not.

Thinker22, I don't think we have to fall, but it seems inevitable. It happens every time.

I love feeling manic, even though it bugs those around me. I just don't care! I love feeling good and I don't want it to stop.

Now my nurse practitioner wants to raise the dosage on my Lamictal because she wants to further stabilize my mood, but I don't wanna! I know I "should"......

Today....I cleaned the house...dusting and all! I couldn't stop. Maybe I should just call her and let her know I'm not preggo (that was what she was waiting to find out before upping it.)....

Reading back on this it's all over the place, but I don't want to fix it, so I hope you can all read it!

Hehe, I cleaned out my closet and put all the clothes that didn't fit me any more into storage. I found things in my size I forgot I had! Also cleaned chinchilla cage, now am doing some exercise and watering plants. Having so much fun doing mundane things!

I love making charts and lists. I guess I'm kinda OCD like that. I want to sing and dance. I know I'm probably annoying people too with my fidgeting...well just my SO right now.

manic w/you

I'm mainly manic most of the time, of course I like it. My pdoc doesn't. When the edge dulls or the flame dims, the people around me start asking whay's wrong, "why are you down?' Sooo, I'm convinced that if the associated WE don't recongize that woohoo rush that may be a little out of place, we can count on riding it out because the peers LIKE the way we interact when we're manic.
Oh yeah, FIRST post, everybody say "Welcome!"
-k-

I usually don't see either mania or depression until I do something really bizarre. Well, bizarre for me. The biggest mistake I made earlier this year was trying to put off inpatient treatment too long. BIG mistake. Oh, well.

and Thank you so much for the input! Yes, you are so correct, most people like the way I am right now...aside from the annoying things I do!

I think part of the problem is that no one EVER taught me what to look for or even what Bipolar even really meant, I had to learn by reading the Internet. Soooo, I don't notice the things that is obvious to everyone else. I am trying to teach myself....frustrating, but still trying.

Oh, sorry to hear that! I hope things are ok now.

I am getting anxious because I keep hearing things that, are obviously, not there. The phone ringing, the doorbell...I actually woke from a deep sleep on Saturday morning at 4am because I SWEAR I heard knocking at my door, but I checked and no one was there. Very unnerving!

What i admire about all of you here is that you question this and you try to understand it, instead of totally denying it as the person i was involved with did to the extreme.

Welcome!!!

I feel exactly the same way. You all describe something that I'm sure goes on inside my husband's head. Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. It helps so much to know he's dealing with some serious swings that have him under a certain amount of control, rather than think he's just a mean spirited and hateful man. Now if only he would see it himself. If only I knew how to talk to him, and more importantly when. If only he could talk with some of you!!

In my case it is easier to recognize. I've been manic twice and both times I went psychotic in the end

bayoumagnolia, others here can give you advice on how to get him to realize this, i am no expert, but, i did live with a very sick man who sucked the life blood out of me. it was very unhealthy and i was run ragged and abused in so many ways by him.
we went to a very well known counselor, psychiatrist, who now is a life coach. She told me there is a lot of dark stuff behind him and she was worried about me. she tried so hard to help him but could not, and this is pretty common among those who choose to deny it and he did vehemenantly. If your hubby is willing to go and get help then good for you guys.

I too am trying to figure it all out. I was just diagnosed bipolar around a month ago. I am on Lithium. I can already tell a difference in my moods. Right now I am having a low. I went manic and no one knew what was wrong with me. My husband had me put in the hospital
and now I am so confused. I liked feeling so good during my high. But, it got me into some kind of trouble! I was fine with everything but it seems like I went to sleep one night, and bam! I was a maniac! I was doing stupid stuff and my thoughts raced faster than I could talk, I was tripping over words and talking backwards! I could not sit still, I had to be doing something! And my kids...I probably traumatized them worse than my marriage is falling apart now. So, I am trying to pick up the pieces and I am gaining a lot of stress from it. Which is not helping my low right now. So if anyone has any suggestions, please.....pass them on!

only,
From what I have learned and experienced is that you must realize the hypomanic tendencies when they begin. You most likely will not be reasonable enough to ascertain the fact that you are manic on your own once you have achieved a manic state. Also, like many have said, you must rely on your support system to inform you that you are starting to make that upward move.

I thought this 6 week period of mania was unique, but in therapy I discovered that I've had many episodes in the past, I just didn't view them that way at the time. So...I relate. It's hard to recognize episodes until after your dx, and even then to figure out when they started or if it was just overnight. I've gone on spending sprees, been irritable or else elated, rapid speech, silly behavior, and didn't get it until recently that that was all part of the problem...the flip side to depression! So it goes. But you'll learn with time. I had to figure out the warning signs online too. Maybe print out a list of signs and every day go through them and see how many you have going on. If it's a lot, probably mania is coming or has come, if a few, it might be starting, etc.

Best of luck and

Thank you so much thinker22 and everyone! It is very helpful to hear everyone else's experiences and ways to deal. I think that is a good idea about printing out warning signs and maybe tracking them on a daily basis so that I can recognize them better in the future and keep track of them now.