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#401
Oct 10, 2014, 10:52 AM
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Doing great
Yay for the long weekend
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What's so funny about peace, love and understanding? Elvis Costello |
 Hopeful Camel, Pikku Myy
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#403
Oct 11, 2014, 04:26 AM
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I am getting bit by bed bugs. I had an exterminator in yesterday. Apparently this did not work. Otherwise, I feel OK but tired and frustrated.
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Dx: Bipolar I, ADD, GAD. Rx: Fluoxetine, Buproprion, Olanzapine, Lamictal, and Strattera. |
 Hopeful Camel
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#404
Oct 11, 2014, 06:20 PM
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Trying to run a bit of interference between BF and his dad. Things have been rather… tense. (Wonder if the deviation from my normal behavior of barely talking has been noticed. Lol.) I'm "on break" atm. We're putting a funny movie on shortly. Here's hoping it will have a mellowing effect. Myself, doing alright. Too busy keeping an eye on dynamics… (It's not horrid, just tense and snarky. Very different personalities.)
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#406
Oct 11, 2014, 06:52 PM
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Volatile, highly unstable, enraged, full of hate! Need to be isolated from the people around me! I REALLY, REALLY need for them to leave me alone right now!!! Especially "HIM"!
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| Standup2me
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#407
Oct 11, 2014, 07:34 PM
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Oh, sweet cheezits, the meds are finally kicking in.
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| DelusionsDaily, Hopeful Camel, Standup2me, tigersassy
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#408
Oct 11, 2014, 09:24 PM
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Saw pdoc today. Lithium at therapeutic level, finally. Still anxious, still down. High level unhappiness with my life. Maybe I am just one big character flaw. I wish I wasn't so sad.
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Bipolar I, C-PTSD Lamictal 400mg, Zyprexa 15mg, Topomax 100mg, Elavil 50mg |
| Anonymous45023
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#409
Oct 11, 2014, 10:29 PM
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Quote:
It makes me smile 
__________________
What's so funny about peace, love and understanding? Elvis Costello |
| Alone & confused
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#410
Oct 11, 2014, 10:36 PM
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Quote:
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| Hopeful Camel, Standup2me
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#411
Oct 12, 2014, 05:23 PM
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Quote:
__________________
What's so funny about peace, love and understanding? Elvis Costello |
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#412
Oct 12, 2014, 07:06 PM
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As usual, doing mostly well. Was crabby today and anxious as I am going to apply for a new position at work. I am looking forward to the challenge but am also freaking out a bit. Deep, slow breaths.
__________________
Bipolar II / GAD / SAD / PMDD ------------ Prozac 30mg, Wellbutrin 150mg, Latuda 40mg |
| Blitter2014, Hopeful Camel, Pikku Myy
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#413
Oct 12, 2014, 07:41 PM
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Down. Still. Tried to be happy, but it's so hard and tiring. I try and I try but it isn't helping. Can I just sleep forever? Wednesday. Just have to hang on till Wednesday. Pdoc appt but I'm not wanting to go. I'm broken there is no fixing it. My brain is broken... they don't know how to fix it and I don't think they ever will. Back to work tomorrow. And another day of falling being happy because no one can know I'm broken. I don't even like my wife knowing that I'm broken. It's time for bed. What if I don't wake up? Would anyone miss me? Time ticks and nothing happens. I'm just empty nothing lifts the depression. I can fake like a pro for a time then it shows for a little while in that time my wife makes a comment and back to the faking. I hate this crap. Fml. What did I do to deserve this? Grrrr....
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PTSD possible bipolar Meds: propranalol 20mg 2x's(blood pressure), lamictal 300mg, seroquel 100mg, effexor 75mg, sprycel 100mg (CML, chronic myeloid leukemia), iron supplement, multivitamin  |
| Anonymous45023, Blitter2014, Hopeful Camel, Pikku Myy
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#414
Oct 12, 2014, 07:55 PM
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Home. TG.
The uncomfortable weekend came to a head this morning. Having seen it coming, I'd quietly packed up our stuff to be ready to leave. Was nervous, uncomfortable, and frankly, hiding(!) Running interference is one thing, but confrontation in this situation? No. That was BF's to deal with. Being expected to help someone with a fairly senseless project who is difficult to work with, stubborn, unwilling to hear input, upset with us (right down to the weather) and being passive aggressive to beat the band is frankly, not appealing. Hell, not acceptable. So we left. It wasn't fun, but there's no effect mood-wise. It's not mine to own. Despite minor whining over having sore muscles and being tired, it's good to be home. P.S. "Sweet Cheezits" Love it! 
Last edited by Anonymous45023; Oct 12, 2014 at 08:31 PM. |
| Hopeful Camel, Pikku Myy
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#415
Oct 12, 2014, 08:16 PM
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Hey... haven't been on in a long time... hi !!!
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| Anonymous45023, Blitter2014, Hopeful Camel, Pikku Myy
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#416
Oct 12, 2014, 08:31 PM
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Today was great, my husband and I went downtown to the Italian festival and had some super awesome garlic bread and spaghetti with meatballs. Listened to live music and shopped the street vendors and farmers market. Pretty cool! Now I'm going home to make my Halloween costume, I am going to be a candy corn fairy and tomorrow my staff and I are going to the pumpkin patch to buy kids pumpkins and play around in the corn mazes. I'm excited
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What would you attempt to do, if you knew you could not fail? - unknown Borderline Personality Disorder Bipolar 1 |
| Blitter2014
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| Hopeful Camel, Pikku Myy
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#417
Oct 13, 2014, 12:50 AM
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Well it seems all the medication in the world that I have tried over the last 18 months has not been able to prevent the inevitable....our fall into financial ruin. We are now in the process of selling all our assets in an attempt to be able to keep a roof over our heads.
I wish I could have found the right medication in time. I wish there was some cure for this terrible and crippling affliction, one that not only affects the sufferer, but any family and friends associated with them. I wish I could have prevented this from happening. I want to wake up and all of this is just a bad dream. But I am awake. This is real. And I am seriously up the creek without a paddle. Is this what leads people to do the inevitable? Does anyone with Bipolar actually live out their life and find contentment, or are we all doomed to self destruct and top ourselves before our time? I know how I feel at the moment. Scared. Alone. And without any answers or hope for the future.
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"Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes"  Success and failure are two of many words we get to define, not society. Our success depends on definition and intentions, not actions |
| Anonymous45023, Hopeful Camel, Pikku Myy, sideblinded, Standup2me
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#418
Oct 13, 2014, 04:49 AM
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3:45 am, new meds not helping me to sleep through the night. I wish pdoc would stop trying to change my meds and realize my cocktail keeps me asleep.
Angst over money, jobs, lack of income, yadda yadda. I am still looking for that happy medium. For a life that isn't seriously messed up. Hugs to everyone.
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Bipolar I, C-PTSD Lamictal 400mg, Zyprexa 15mg, Topomax 100mg, Elavil 50mg |
| Blitter2014, Pikku Myy
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#419
Oct 13, 2014, 01:19 PM
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Quote:
The elusive happy medium. Yeah I'd like a large order of normal with a side of fries and a milkshake please. |
| Hopeful Camel
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#420
Oct 13, 2014, 10:06 PM
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Quote:
__________________
What's so funny about peace, love and understanding? Elvis Costello |
| tigersassy
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#421
Oct 13, 2014, 10:08 PM
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Went for a walk around a lake today
It was so nice to be out of the stench of the city
__________________
What's so funny about peace, love and understanding? Elvis Costello |
| Blitter2014, Hopeful Camel
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#422
Oct 13, 2014, 10:20 PM
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Very very restless
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| Hopeful Camel
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#423
Oct 14, 2014, 01:54 AM
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I survived today, I did what I had to do, and I managed to end the day less stressed than when it started.
__________________
"Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes" Success and failure are two of many words we get to define, not society. Our success depends on definition and intentions, not actions |
| Hopeful Camel
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#424
Oct 14, 2014, 01:56 AM
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Extremely agitated this morning. I'd like to say I didn't flip my s***, but I kind of did.
Later in day started ruminating (yet again) on a sad realization (something that makes me very sad that's been going on awhile… well, realized just how long now. Sigh.) I've got a disability psych evaluation coming up on Thursday. Kind of nervous about it, now that it's getting close. Did manage to get out to the grocery store for a few things. Can't describe how it's going, though it is safe to say that it could be going better. |
| Blitter2014, Hopeful Camel
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#425
Oct 14, 2014, 05:10 PM
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I am doing okay today.
It is warm and sunny out, and that is always good for my soul
__________________
What's so funny about peace, love and understanding? Elvis Costello |
| Blitter2014
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| Hopeful Camel
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| Closed Thread |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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