Anyone else?

I've stayed in bed. I've worn same clothes and even slept in them for last four days and couldn't care less. I want nothing to do with my friends nor my regular activities. I'm uneasy I gave up the pills. Between bouts of high anxiety, I cry and sleep. I've self harmed.ive been impulsive. They say I'm high risk.

It's beautiful outside and I wish it was dark and raining like I feel. I see T tomorrow and hope I can say with honesty I feel better.

I think of darkness and wish for light. I try new coping skills but it's hard to even do them. Am I alone or do talk understand this?

Aww sweety, I hope you get to feeling better. But if it was me, I'd want to go in there and bite my doctors head off so he can see that it ain't working! I hope it goes well that you do make it.

We did safety plan yesterday when I did an emergency walk in appt. I wanna get better. I try to get up and do things but being in bed feels better. Idol what will happen tomorrow. Hopefully good. I'm keeping my word to T by doing that walk in and seeing him tom. Other option he gave me was to go to er. I don't want that,

Have you ever considered posting on the "Bipolar Daily Check-in Thread?" I think if you read & wrote there you wouldn't feel as unique.

I completely understand how you feel. I no there's a light at the end of our tunnel I'm just unsure of how to reach it

(((((((Halliebeth)))))))

I've had days like that, you're not alone, although I know I always felt alone during my bad times. Posting here and having people respond did help me feel better. I've never been able to get up when I know that moving around will help me, its just so hard to not stay in bed where it feels so comfortable.

I wish i knew what i did to make you not like me

Have felt like this many times but it will pass-some days are harder than others. It sucks & I'm sorry you're going through such a rough time-keep posting & checking in so we know how you're doing-hope your appointment goes well-take care

I don't dislike you (& at peril of getting sanctioned) I just truly feel sorry for you because you put yourself through crisis after crisis. I read your threads...& it seems you can't allow yourself to be happy. For example, about a week ago you were so happy that you had a new pdoc & had high hopes. Now, you're back digging a hole for yourself like you did a month ago (landing in the hospital).

I sincerely wish you were able to enjoy some happiness, or at least some stability for some period of time (even a few weeks). I wasn't being "mean" by suggesting you read the "Bipolar Check In Thread." Rather, it deals with many of the same issues you're dealing with & might not make you feel so alone. It also speaks in voices of those who have defeated their demons & found periods of happiness. I'm bipolar & have my bad spells, so I most likely know some of what you're dealing with. It's not easy, but dwelling on it isn't exactly healthy. "Bipolar Success Stories" is another possibility to give you ideas to free yourself from the bondage of bipolar. Maybe doing more reading will help you stop the slide (if not make the bad feelings go away), rather than writing every time you have a feeling. You & I aren't the first ones to feel the bad stuff that accompanies bipolar.

Sending big hugs and positive thoughts your way. I'm so sorry you are feeling like this. I just started to feel a bit better and my depression is lifting a tiny bit. A few weeks ago, I was right where you are. Hang in there, it will pass eventually. (((Hugs)))

I had a good two weeks and had lots log laughter and joy before this came. I've tried to identify a trigger and can't. I've been doing my diary cArds for my DBT class that starts tomorrow. It's my personLity to want to understand and identify and relate with people. I don't mean to be annoying. I want people to like me and I want to get better or I wouldn't bother going to see my t or pdoc. I've tried things me Nd t talk about and found some new ways to cope but things just aren't working right now.

I've been in the same clothes for four days and I don't give a ****. And I certainly don't want to be around people. I'm most safe in my room filled with distractions. I write in my journal a lot but sometimes want to relate to my peers.

I know many many other people deal with bp and I don't discount that when I feel bad.

I just feel a bit lost. My bp didnt use to be like this. My episodes were a way apart from one another. Now it seems little time passes before another. That's why my last pdoc said I have rapid cyclinf. I get mixed a lot.

I'm rambling. I'm not sure what I meant with any of that.

That describes me to a tee when I'm having one of my depressed/anxious episodes. What's the problem with worn clothes if you're not going out -- that's my attitude, anyways. There are times when I don't leave the house for a full week because I can't deal with people. Even as I'm doing these things, I know it's my fault for not stepping out of my comfort zone & forcing myself to be around people. If I can't, I don't blame myself, or seek the sympathy of others. I don't know...Maybe it's a guy thing. When I'm at my worse, I'm less likely to post on PC. I've been in therapy long enough to know what I have to do to shake the blues. It's a matter of choosing to do so...or at least giving it some effort (which is sometimes impossible).

In short, I'm bipolar, as well...& don't dislike you. Just giving you a different perspective. If I'm off mark, just ignore me.

I'm glad you don't dislike me. Ty

Wearing the same clothes for four days in a row and not showering is a big sign of depression for me. My depression has started to get a little better lately - I've taken a shower two times during the last week when I wasn't even going out anywhere - that's big progress.

The problem with wearing the same clothes for 4 days in a row? They usually will smell. People do come to my door sometimes.

The OP isn't the only one who may be offended by your first post. Not all of us are so skilled at coping that we don't get scared when we have anxiety and strong sui urges that go on for days.

"Seeking sympathy" isn't the only reason to post on here. I came here a couple of months ago with medication questions and questions about treatment-resistant depression and have learned so much. Also, the huge number of people who are dealing with similar problems for some reason helps to make me more determined to fight my depression.

I just started going to therapy again last fall after not having any for years because of money reasons.

It's easy to tell the OP to ignore you. Dozens of people are going to read your posts, though.

Hugs. Hope you feel better soon. I am sending happiness and love your way.

Maybe try rolling yourself out of bed, and then crawl your way to the bathroom if you don't feel like walking. You can lay in the shower if you want. It'll probably make you feel a little better to take a shower. I love taking showers. Showers make me feel better.

Ty all. I saw t today and we discussed a new safety plan and such. He said i cycle quickly. I start DBT group this afternoon. In still down and anxious but better. Ty!