[Ocean Swimmer]

I read a lot.
My husband totally buys into the chemical imbalance deal,partly my fault as I used it to describe what is wrong with me.
So now he's insisting on complete compliance with my drugs.
I'm scared.
I don't want to be dependent on drugs for the rest of my life.
Who knows what will happen when he retires to our medical coverage. Plus these drugs are getting more and more expensive.
What if they're doing more harm than good as has been written about?
How do you feel about this?
I'm so tired of the side effects.And scared about the potential tapering to rid myself of these drugs.
I have a million reasons to suffer mentally. Abuse. Fiancé suicide. Best friend suicide.
Being robbed over 50 times.
Poor diet.
No intimacy with partner of 20 years.

[Ocean Swimmer]

Thanks Lorrie ! Love you!

[Wattsherfayce]

IMO the chemical imbalance theory was invented as a marketing ploy for advertising medications.

It's not so much as a chemical imbalance as it is a problem with disordered neuronal processing and synaptic pruning at accelerated rates during adolescence.

It's a great marketing ploy to describe in the most simplistic terms for consumers who use these drugs. It doesn't help that most psychiatrists don't have time and just use verbatim what their marketing reps told them. You'd be lucky to find a psychiatrist who would take the time to talk to you more than 5 minutes, so saying "it's a chemical imbalance" is the shortest and easiest way to explain to the average consumer why using drugs can "help".

We are still in the dark ages of psychiatry. We have made little progress over the last 50 years. 49 years ago was the last prefrontal lobotomy performed in America. We still use the same drugs to treat bipolar that was discovered in the mid 1800's (Lithium) and we don't have any other medication specific for bipolar disorder. All medications are 'borrowed' from treatments for epilepsy, depression, or schizophrenia.

However new discoveries are being found each day. Like how ketamine can successfully treat severe depression for bipolar without causing mania (like antidepressants do).

With Neuropsychiatry there is a lot of new information to be discovered. It's still in it's infancy and there is so much to discover about the human brain. This is why we need to push our governments to support the health sciences.

I'm gonna stop babbling. Sorry for the rant, this is something I feel very personal about.

[Ghost5]

As someone who had taken numerous anti depressants, I'm not at all convinced about the chemical imbalance theory. The anti depressants I've taken have only ever given me (quite serious) side effects without actually doing anything for the depression or my Co morbid metal illnesses . The most annoying thing is psychiatrists (the ones I've seen) completely buy into the chemical imbalance theory and seem surprised when a specific anti depressant doesn't work or they almost don't believe you.
Depression and mental illness seems such an unknown and mysterious area of medicine and I've came to the conclusion after 20+years of various treatments, science just doesn't have the answer at this moment in time. I'm at the point now of believing that for me anyway , being on anti depressants is just as bad as being off of them,2 sides of a horrible coin.

[venusss]

Is there any test that would be measure the imbalance and measure how much meds have balanced it?

There isn't. Psychiatry should either cough up that test (which they never will because it's simply not how it works) or toss the theory and apologized to all those that have been harmed by it.

[bathroomscrubber]

I've been really concerned about that myself. I have tried (as an adult) three times now to figure out what is wrong with me. I went back to drinking the two previous times because the psych doctors just don't seem to listen. My last one would see me for an hour. And still my point was NOT getting through. By the time I realized he was just going to kill me with all his raising of doses and adding of new pills, I was so heavily sedated I could barely function. This time I'm in a different state and cannot seem to find a psych doctor at all. Even after being hospitalized this time. While sober. I hate being on meds. Especially when I'm not sure they are helping. From moment to moment I ddon't know what mood I'll be in

[Ripose]

There is no chemcal imbalance until you take that first pill. From there it is just chemicals run amok, most of which they have no idea how they work.

[Ocean Swimmer]

I know.
I was so heavily medicated in the hospital I don't even remember what my room was like or visits from my husband.
I lost those months of my life.
Plus the ECT.
I'm still not over that.
I am on meds now,and getting fat. Sure I know I eat at night after the seraquel,but it's almost an addiction to eat after that pill.
I've also read how hard it is to get off the other drugs I take.
And yes,I'm still very depressed and super tired all of the time.
I feel guilty every time I take the pills.
I need a new Pdoc too. Rats.

[Ghost5]

Originally Posted by Ripose

There is no chemcal imbalance until you take that first pill. From there it is just chemicals run amok, most of which they have no idea how they work.

You can feel your brain chemistry being messed around with when you take these drugs,i hate it. They should make psychiatrists try all meds they prescribe as I dont think they realise what it's actually like.

[LorrieTorrie]

Originally Posted by Ocean Swimmer

Thanks Lorrie ! Love you!

The feeling is mutual!

[Ocean Swimmer]

Yes Ghost. Once I asked my Pdoc what it feels like to have a broken leg.
He said,"I don't need to have a broken leg to know what it feels like!".

So full of Ca-Ca! I'd love to hook up with a Psychiatrist that's suffering Bipolar disorder. And like you said,One Whom takes these dangerous drugs and likes them.

Furthermore that they're helped by these drugs before insisting I take them and making my husband keep me in compete compliance.

[TryingToMoveForward]

Well. Medications help me. Sometimes my psychiatrist talks to me for twenty minutes. They test these medications in order to sell them. I think there has to be some scientific backing behind them. Not that they're perfect, but that is nothing the psychiatrist says, nor is labeled on the boxes and bottles, that states there is a 100% guarantee they will work. There are studies that show there are deficiencies in the flow and exchange of neurotransmitters that are not present in people without these disorders. Maybe because I studied psychology in college and high school and have been a big supporter behind the field, I'm a bit biased. But I also know it isn't just medication that makes you better. You can't just take a pill and magically all your symptoms will disappear. That isn't how it works. You need therapy, to learn how to manage moods and emotions, how to cope with the stressers of life because stability is not a constant thing. Not even for people without a mental illness. Life will always throw a curve ball and its important to have the right coping skills to deal with them. I know there is no medication that will get rid of my PTSD, so I am doing EMDR to normalize the memories, and bring them to a different part of the brain where they won't effect me emotionally. There's a chance it won't work, but most people have a high success rate. I don't want to take medication forever either. But my first psychiatrist told me from day one that I might not have to be on meds forever anyway.

So what I'm saying, is that its a combination of medication and therapy, internal work, that really helps you recover and live a normal life. Don't let any psychiatrist tell you there is a miracle pill. Meds can have bad side effects. But sometimes the good out weighs the bad, and you have to decide what's more worth it. Being slightly more stable on a medication regime, means I'm having a slightly better life than I otherwise would be having.

But I do believe there is an imbalance in neurotransmitters because I feel science can prove it.

And now I'm done being the oddball here. I've really seen medications help people, when they find the right one. So I can't say they're the root of all evil and completely worthless. If I didn't believe in them, I wouldn't be taking the risk by consuming them everyday. They keep me from being washed away into psychotic symptoms. Right now on what I take, I am clear minded and high functioning. My current problems stem from emotional instability which can be treated with therapy, because there aren't ant medications specifically for BPD. The only other medication I want right now, is if I do have epilepsy (unless LamICTal can be used to treat it, I'll just stay on that), and something for ADD.

[Ocean Swimmer]

I think Tripatal is a drug used for Epilepsy and mental illness.

[TryingToMoveForward]

I know LamICTal definitely is. If I don't have to switch I don't want to, because LamICTal doesn't really cause me any problems or side effects. There's always a risk that switching could bring more problems. But if LamICTal and Lithium do the same thing, I see no need to be on both of them. They're both mood stabilizers and I'm sitting here, scratching my head, asking why I need them both. Tomorrow I see my psychiatrist and my agenda is:

1. Tell him about the memory issues and how its related to ADD and I need something to help me with these symptoms because they are seriously, detrimentally affecting my life.
2. Why do I need Lithium if I'm on LamICTal. And if I can get off it.

Not being on an anti-depressant is going well so far! I really don't like being on meds any more than anyone else, but if they help I'm willing to take them. If they're unnecessary, then I won't. Thankfully I have insurance that pays for treatment and medication, so I'm not losing money here. But someone else is paying for them for me, and well, I don't want to waste their money either.

[Ocean Swimmer]

I'm with you. Lamictal or lithium not both.

[Imah]

I read a lot also. I explore many things too. I was diagnosed bipolar in my teens and did nothing about it until my 40's when my life hit its bottom.

Whatever is happening in my brain - however they want to refer to it - my medication helps. Being able to identify which behaviors stem from my diagnosis helps. I have less delusions. I have less psychic impressions (thank goodness). I am more stable. I even hope to someday be able to finish something I start that takes longer then a couple days. Even finding this forum, and reading so many similarities in what my brother and sister bp's experience has helped. We can't pretend we don't have similar problems that stem from the brain.

I know your going through a normal questioning time. I think this is a normal process. But I want to tell you, I found your post so disturbing I originally didn't say anything. I have seen it now a few days - perhaps it has helped some people. There is always that. Maybe for me, it should have had a trigger warning. It seems your trying to insert your opinion in a way that will undermine progress. My opinion is, creating doubt and fear doesn't help our journey.

Edit Addition: It took a few years to find the right meds for me. I have had drugs that weren't right for me. I still kept trying, and would be very clear about the side effects. When they are right for you - you know. It feels like not being on anything, without having crazy behavior. We went through 4 different med combinations we found this, and these are great! I have almost no side effects, and reduced mania and depression. I hope knowing this helps. Keep plugging away!

[raspberrytorte]

My meds help me. I haven't had a severe depression episode in three years. I have a really bad anxiety disorder and my meds help with that. I don't have the feeling of impending doom I used to have all the time, not related to anxious thoughts. I've had an anxiety problem since I was a little girl, so something has to be off in my brain. I have psychotic symptoms. The last time I had them I was put on a different antipsychotic and they went away. I don't know how I'm supposed to get rid of psychosis when I have it. I don't know I'm psychotic.

So they help me, and I'm grateful for them.

[venusss]

I know your going through a normal questioning time. I think this is a normal process. But I want to tell you, I found your post so disturbing I originally didn't say anything. I have seen it now a few days - perhaps it has helped some people. There is always that. Maybe for me, it should have had a trigger warning. It seems your trying to insert your opinion in a way that will undermine progress. My opinion is, creating doubt and fear doesn't help our journey.

Discounting theories that are not VALID and DO NOT HELP the person is not thing of doubt and fear. It's healthy and rational thing.

Cling on scientifically sounding term, even though there is no hard science to back it.... is like some ****ed up sort of religion, sans spirituality, sans moral compass and comfort it provides.

[Ocean Swimmer]

Hi. I'm glad you presented the other side of the coin.
Your meds interest me. I've never heard of them and will research online in my quest for a better life.

I regret my post caused you discomfort. I'm speaking from my heart and not trying to upset anyone. No one should stop taking thier pills if the pills are doing more good than harm.

I'm exploring whether the things we deal with in life and our lifetime effect our brain.

I read all of your posts and hope you forgive me if something I've said
Bothered you. I respect your opinion.

[Ghost5]

I think perhaps this thread might have been taken the wrong way to an extent.
If the meds help you then they absolutely do have their place and should definitely be taken.

I just feel anti depressants are seen as the be and end all cure for mental illness and personally for me they've never helped my Depression/Anxiety/Anorexia/OCD. Perhaps I've just not found the right one but they've only ever clouded my thoughts and made me feel "drugged up", and apathetic and for me personally it's not a nice feeling, I'd rather be clear in thought and sharp. It gets frustrating when you try and tell a psychiatrist this and they don't believe you and try to make you take more or a different type.
If they do help you however then that's good and they certainly do have their place in medicine.

[Victoria'smom]

I believe chemical inbance my pdoc sat down and taught me Which resectables are effected, how, and which of my symptoms corolate to which reseptical and . He was even going to do an mri or cat scan to show me how different my brain is to a norm but my insurance didn't allow it.That's how sure he was at least in my case all to prove I need meds.

If I were you I'd go to a pdoc that believes less is better. That will let you have controllable swings. Then get a therapist that will work with learning how to manage mood swings after x years years will be able to wean off meds.

[Wattsherfayce]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

He was even going to do an mri or cat scan to show me how different my brain is to a norm but my insurance didn't allow it.That's how sure he was at least in my case all to prove I need meds.

If I were you I'd go to a pdoc that believes less is better. That will let you have controllable swings. Then get a therapist that will work with learning how to manage mood swings after x years years will be able to wean off meds.

MRIs or CAT scans cannot show 'chemical imbalance'. They can show only how much grey/white matter is present (or not). I agree that when it comes to meds that less is better, especially since most of us get treated long term.

~~~~~~~

There is so much miseducation on this 'theory' that was literally made up by marketers in advertisements, it has no scientific basis whatsoever.

HOWEVER!!! Please do not mistake me, I am not saying medications are null.
They can be very helpful in treating the symptoms that we suffer from.

There are no medications out there that cures mental illness in any way. Medications, like therapy, can only help you manage your symptoms and improve your quality of life; which is as close as a 'cure' as you get.

I'd rather see mental illnesses like bipolar get called what they actually are- a neurological disease. Saying simply that it's some sort of 'chemical imbalance' is like saying hyper/hypothyroidism is a chemical imbalance (technically it's more a chemical imbalance than mental illness but no one ever describes it in this fashion).

[Ocean Swimmer]

Hi Whatsherfase: thank you for your input. I thought MRIs and cat scans could prove the chemical thing.

I learned a lot from your post.

I don't be grudge anyone who wants to take drugs,smoke marijuana or do whatever it takes to have a better life.

I want to learn what triggers my mental psychosis to the extent that those around me see no other alternative than put me into a mental hospital.

That's what I'm against,personally.

If it's because of med withdrawal,as I believe it was last time then I need to find a way to protect myself.

The side effects of extreme hunger making me gain weight , high blood pressure and no sexual drive are not acceptable to me.

But to try new meds may require I get off present meds. Something terrifying even to consider.

[Wattsherfayce]

I think it's great that you are trying to find your triggers. I know it's never easy.

I am bipolar 1 as well. When I was on Effexor+stress= major psychotic event. It's how I was 'found out' to be Bipolar. I had a major 'switch'; went manic and into psychosis.

It was a ***** to get off for me. I had to take Prozac (lowest dose) to help me get off it. I struggled with brain zaps for years afterwards.

I've been diagnosed in 2012 (I think? lol) and I've yet to find the 'right meds' for me. I am treatment resistant. I'm on low dose Depakote as it's all I can tolerate. I took one dose of an atypical antipsychotic (Risperdal) and now have mixed laryngeal dystonia. I am super sensitive to medications.

It's been very hard. I've come close to death many a times. Therapy and benzos are my friend lol.

[bathroomscrubber]

Originally Posted by Ocean Swimmer

Hi Whatsherfase: thank you for your input. I thought MRIs and cat scans could prove the chemical thing.

I learned a lot from your post.

I don't be grudge anyone who wants to take drugs,smoke marijuana or do whatever it takes to have a better life.

I want to learn what triggers my mental psychosis to the extent that those around me see no other alternative than put me into a mental hospital.

That's what I'm against,personally.

If it's because of med withdrawal,as I believe it was last time then I need to find a way to protect myself.

The side effects of extreme hunger making me gain weight , high blood pressure and no sexual drive are not acceptable to me.

But to try new meds may require I get off present meds. Something terrifying even to consider.

I took Serquel twice now. I had so many meds the first time that the pdoc wasn't listening to me. I gained a ton of weight. Kept feeling ravenous. Heart palpitations like mad. The stint I just pulled in the hospital, they tried it again. Heart palpitations and a feeling I can't explain, but my body was doing the crazy rock. Within an hour of taking it I was starving. Couldn't seem to sate the need for food. this time I was listened to, and that's when the neurontin was started.