STRANGE

GUESS I HAVE TO LET IT ALL OUT. AND EVEN THEN DON'T KNOW IF I'LL FEEL BETTER OR WORSE. LOVE MY HUBBY AND KIDS JUST I M OT RIGHT WHEN WHERE APART. MY LIFE DEPENDS ON HIS MOOD AND HIS BEING THERE. I NEVER USED TO BE LIKE THAT. OK WHEN I WAS A TEEN AGER I WAS BOY CRAZZY. BUT THIS IS DEF LOVE. BUT I SWING WHEN HE'S GONE IT'S LIKE I LIVE ALL EMOTIONS WHEN HE'S GONE ALL BUT HAPPY MY HAPPINESS DEPENDS ON HIM THERE I FIGURED IT OUT. IT DEPENDS ON HIM!!!!!!! HOW SAD I LIVE LIKE THIS. I GUESS OVER THE YEARS MY SELF ESTEAM HAS REALLY GONE DOWN. DON'T GET ME WRONG I CAN STILL BE A ***** BUT BEING MYSELF IS HARD. DON'T NO WHAT OR WHO I AM ANY MORE? WORRY HE'LL STOPLOVING ME. WHAT WILL I DO THEN? MY BIGGEST FEAR. NOW IT'S DOWN ON PAPER. AND IT STILL FEELS HORRIBLE. WELL DON'T FEEL ANY BETTER HOPE YOU GUYS WRITE SOMETHING ,-ONYX

I dont think its strange Oynx that your deeply attatched to hubby.When couples spend a large part of thier lives together you grow and bond throughout the years.When their not there you feel as if your missing something.I think that kinda bond is ok and even healthy.I guess part of bp is tying to define if there really is an issue or is it bp squewing our emotions....
.Im there for ya Oynx....

:

Onyx,

Learning to love your self is most important, then love and security will calm your fears..........

Love ya my friend,,,,,,,,,,,,, in my prayers......

thanks you guys i feel better this am talked to tony last night and he cleared it all up for me. you guys did too. have an awsome day-onyx

I can really relate to you, it is like reading about my own life !I cant give you any advice other than try to love youself a little bit more, I find my mood also depends on his so if he is down then whoops I follow etc.

If I am upset I like to have my children near me I have even kept them off of school in the past, all though I am fighting that one hard as I know this is wrong.

Hugs and thinking of you .........Trish.

thanks trish i understand the mood thing very well. pm me some time we'll talk.-onyx