[wildflowerchild25]

I finally fell asleep around 2:30. I slept until 8:30 so that's good. Six hours. Totally workable.

I think I'm hypo again today. I'm trying to figure out something to do with my son because I can't stand the thought of staying in the house all day. I'm drawing a blank though. He said he doesn't want to go see a movie.

I did a bad thing. I put on my emsam patch without taking the depakote. I was just sooooo depressed yesterday and I couldn't stand the thought of being depressed for another day. Maybe that's why I'm slightly hypo today. But I do have an AP on board so it's not totally irresponsible.

[Wild Coyote]

Have been reading here daily. Have been in too much pain to write. Had a dystonic reaction to a Wellbutrin increase. It's taking time to sort out if it's dose-dependent; in the meanwhile, the dystonia returns.

Love to All!

WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Lots of tears and panic attacks going on right now. Have taken some Valium and doing my Daily Calm meditation but it's not yet working. I know why it's happening so I have some insight but that isn't helping me stop it. I honestly feel like a loser right now with nothing significant to contribute.

I know a lot of us are struggling here and I'm sending out a big group hug.

(((((( Jennifer ))))))

I hope you feel better soon.

WC

[Faltering]

I'm regressing since starting my new job. It's a huge source of stress. I'm afraid of what's to come. I can't afford to miss any days this year.

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Have been reading here daily. Have been in too much pain to write. Had a dystonic reaction to a Wellbutrin increase. It's taking time to sort out if it's dose-dependent; in the meanwhile, the dystonia returns.

Love to All!

WC

Oh my goodness. I didn't know what dystonia was so I had to look it up. It sounds very painful. I'm sorry you're having such a tough time with your medication and hope you feel better soon.

[sonjaward809]

I'm super pumped because I'll be moving back to Kansas soon! I'm from Texas and currently stay in my hometown .. but I have to admit it's time for a change of scenery. I'll be staying with my grandma until I can get out on my own when I get up there but it will be worth it. I can also help look after her since we only have a few family members up there. Nobody really helps her out besides my brother and aunt, my mom lives down here in Texas and can't visit often. I'll also be near a big city and that excites me! I've always lived in a small town, so living in a big city is going to be an adjustment .. especially the traffic So my anxiety is kind of through the roof, I have HORRIBLE driving anxiety! I only know my way around 1/10 of the city I'll be in. I'll just stay off the highways until I'm comfortable. I've already started packing up and will be moving in a few weeks. I just can't wait to visit my family and be in a new area.

[Woolly Bugger]

I didn't know there were any big cities in Kansas...

[99fairies]

I am on holiday with my family and usually I shut down in new surroundings but I've been doing amazingly well. Probably drinking too much but I still feel stable and well.

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by Woolly Bugger

I didn't know there were any big cities in Kansas...

Kansas City is a major headache to drive around. It sprawls over the border into Missouri.

[Unrigged64072835]

Doing pretty good until I made dinner. Juggling different tasks spiked my anxiety a a lot. Now waiting for my husband to finish the dishes. Trying to calm down.

Daughter's friend is still depressed. Told her she needs to take care of herself first as she is burning out trying to help him. Also told her if he did anything rash it's not her fault. Made it easier for her to go to work.

Mood is still pretty steady for the most part. Just situations are kind of messed up, but nothing major.

[Moose72]

Trying to learn to french braid. My mom said she'd come over. N2 has the long hair. Mines short.

[Altarian]

To be honest i'm very pissed off right now for reasons i don't want to get into because it would just end up in a argument between me and others here or me being banned. Aside from that i'm doing pretty ok. helped my wife make potato salad, which i hate but family loves. I also after 4 years put two of my earrings back in my ears only this time both on one side. can't wait for my coworkers reaction since they already give me crap for being a pirate thanks to always wearing a piece of torn cloth as a bandana. Also can't wait to see my family's face when they see i put them back in, will piss them all off.

[Cocosurviving]

Originally Posted by sonjaward809

I'm super pumped because I'll be moving back to Kansas soon! I'm from Texas and currently stay in my hometown .. but I have to admit it's time for a change of scenery. I'll be staying with my grandma until I can get out on my own when I get up there but it will be worth it. I can also help look after her since we only have a few family members up there. Nobody really helps her out besides my brother and aunt, my mom lives down here in Texas and can't visit often. I'll also be near a big city and that excites me! I've always lived in a small town, so living in a big city is going to be an adjustment .. especially the traffic So my anxiety is kind of through the roof, I have HORRIBLE driving anxiety! I only know my way around 1/10 of the city I'll be in. I'll just stay off the highways until I'm comfortable. I've already started packing up and will be moving in a few weeks. I just can't wait to visit my family and be in a new area.

Hello there....I hope everything works out for you.

[Cocosurviving]

My day has been very relaxing. My younger daughter went to spend the weekend with my older daughter. I was home alone...well me and my dog. I ran to the store to get laundry detergent. Then had a healthy lunch at Panera Bread. I returned home and washed my hair.

[Wander]

My moods are swinging dramatically. It is infuriating as I want to be discharged (IP) but pdoc says not till I am stable. At least today is an upswing. I feel positive and hopeful and the agitation is much lower than the excruciating pains of yesterday. But what does tomorrow hold? I don't know and that bothers me. Trying to live in the moment and it works sometimes but other times I get drowned by my mood swings.

Today was nice. I went for a walk along the beach with my feet in the water, had lunch with my parents then hung out at their house for a while before coming back to hospital. My mind is racing but I don't feel hypomanic. Just feel like my head is crammed full of people taking to each other.

Fun fact: Lefty's mother was a published feminist poet whose work was disseminated by USAID in Muslim countries in what could only have been a CIA psychological warfare campaign intended to destabilize targeted nations by spreading feminist consciousness within the misogyny of Islam. This was in the 1980's, but I still have a newspaper clipping that corroborates the campaign and her poems can still be found in darker corners of the internet translated into Turkish. Unfortunately she died from aggressive ovarian cancer in 2006.

Reunification is near.

Originally Posted by Altarian

To be honest i'm very pissed off right now for reasons I don't want to get into because it would just end up in a argument between me and others here or me being banned.

Getting into arguments, making trouble and being banned are the only reasons I post on this forum. Oh, and the free donuts.

[xRavenx]

My toe is all messed up from an infection, which happened after I had a pedicure. It has been a week on antibiotics, but I don't feel any better. It is probably time to go to a podiatrist. Fear of having to get my foot amputated are there, but that's my crazy anxiety of course. I actually fell asleep without Seroquel last night (shocking for me). It was probably the red wine I had last night. Then again, it only put me to sleep for a few hours, and now I'm wide awake and up.

Mood-wise: I have a lot of racing thoughts lately and anger about all these different things out of my control. Consciously, I'll try to push it away and "cope," but these thoughts keep popping up, uncontrollably. It's not pleasant. I'll just have to deal with it and talk to my pdoc. I've spent so much money on random things too, and I'm trying to take back some of them, but can't for everything. Pretty sure I'm entering a mixed state or experiencing some type of rapid cycling.

[scatterbrained04]

Mood is slowly improving with time, but managing stress is still an issue for me at the moment.

Yesterday I scraped doing chores and enjoyed the day. Read a book for a good portion, went to World Market, and later took my son to the movies at the mall to see The Dark Tower.

Today is chores and grocery shopping. I'm dreading it. May be a 15 minute timer kind of day.

[Sunflower123]

I know this is temporary. Having said that, I am in so much pain I think it might actually drive me out of my mind or kill me. I am heartbroken and I hate it and I hate being so weak. I am paralyzed with pain right now.

bad day

for most of the morning/ early afternoon was out of it, by the time I actually had energy it was around 4 PM and I had no idea what had happened during the day.

also found out today I got banned from a game I like, so not too happy about that- but it was going to happen eventually.

didn't get to eat much, I mean I did have lots of my plate, but because I was so out of it mentally, really struggled to eat

Terrible. That's how I feel right now. Terrible.

I know I'm severely depressed because I stopped taking my Lexapro. My pdoc and I tried to wean me off it, but this is the second time we've failed in doing so. I guess I'll never get off this stupid drug. Never. The withdrawal effects are too much to handle.

Been like this since Wednesday last week.

[Unrigged64072835]

(((((Everyone)))))

I took too much medication this morning, and felt groggy and lethargic for most of the day. I missed church and spent the day trying to do something, but not succeeding. It's hard to keep a balance since most of my meds are sedating, and adding a muscle relaxer doesn't help things. So today was pretty much a waste.

My daughter is doing better, though her friend is still depressed. Hoping that it will lift once he goes back to college and gets away from his dad. My husband seems to be doing better as well. He had a med increase and he bounced between grumpiness and depression for a while.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Altarian

To be honest i'm very pissed off right now for reasons i don't want to get into because it would just end up in a argument between me and others here or me being banned. Aside from that i'm doing pretty ok. helped my wife make potato salad, which i hate but family loves. I also after 4 years put two of my earrings back in my ears only this time both on one side. can't wait for my coworkers reaction since they already give me crap for being a pirate thanks to always wearing a piece of torn cloth as a bandana. Also can't wait to see my family's face when they see i put them back in, will piss them all off.

They'd love me. I have my ears pierced twice on each side and stretched too. And my tongue and lips are pierced too. I say go with what makes you happy.

[Icare dixit]

!!!!!!!!!manic!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!manic!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!manic!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!manic!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!manic!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!manic!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!manic!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!manic!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!MANIC!!!!!!!!!!!