[zbmom]

I'm doing horrible. I wish I could fix myself. I'm hoping pdoc will help on Monday.

[bpforever1]

I am relieved in a way I did not get the full-time job. They required really long hours and a lot of traveling. I just wanted to see if I could do it. But, now I am happy with what I have. I will think of things to do in my downtime. The money was ok but am already used to a frugal lifestyle. I will be ok for now. Life is not bad!! I am always easily tired and need to sleep a lot. I was wondering how I was going to do a full-time job. I feel pretty good about my life. May be I will think of starting a business,instead of always looking to be hired. I don't know what I will do. At my age, it is hard to get hired. I must be realistic about my options and maximize what I have now. I am just happy to be healthy and not be too stressed. I saved enough money to carry me through this period. I will be fine.

yesterday I phoned for some more anxiety meds.

good thing is, is that i'm actually getting them friday (so not long to go at all)

ordered groceries too, though most of it was junkfood.

I can't help myself, I just see it their and have to have it

then promptly ordered a pizza takeout meal, ate it way too fast and felt extremely sick afterwards.

today (after another night of no sleep), spent the last 2 hours (maybe longer?) watching cartoons, because i've found out cartoons are better for you than laughter (well okay, I didn't find that out, it's actually my theory)

it is thursday so I get to see my mental health worker later, and that will bea blessing I think.

not so much a tough week, it's just the moods i'm struggling with.

people forget how draining it actually is to go from 1 extreme to another (the people that no nothing at all about MI)

Hope everyone has a good day

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by vertigo

Yeah, it may be catastrophising, but I feel fairly certain that our house is going to be nothing a pile of ashes when we get back to it. I so desperately want this to be over.

I hope your house is saved. This has to be heart wrenching. Thinking of you and your family.

[WildcatVet]

Yesterday was a pretty good day...accomplished a lot...woke up after a pretty sleepless night still feeling kinda cheery and productive. But now I've done my self care and some household chores...running out of things to do. BOREDOM setting in...very dangerous for me. Boredom breeds ruminating...
Very worried about friends and family in California...it's getting really bad there...

[bizi]

Had a great evening with friends at a very expensive restaurant last night. We treated our girl friend, we all had a couple of drinks, had this delicious fish which was $32 a piece, bill was $250 including tip!!!!!
It was really nice and we had a place amongst A wine cellar so it was intimate.
My friend is leaving to go back to Nashville, her town now.
Her 11 year old daughter is blossoming there and Nicole grew up there and is rekindling past friendships easily. Which is very good.
She has a job too, flying out monday for training...and will be looking for a place of their own...have been living with her parents who fight a lot.
The girl will say good bye to her dad who is on house arrest due to child porn on the internet and will be going to prison after his trial.
She doesn't know when they will get back to town again.

Any way, I need to get a shower
and start my day.
hugs to those who need them
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bizi

Had a great evening with friends at a very expensive restaurant last night. We treated our girl friend, we all had a couple of drinks, had this delicious fish which was $32 a piece, bill was $250 including tip!!!!!
It was really nice and we had a place amongst A wine cellar so it was intimate.
My friend is leaving to go back to Nashville, her town now.
Her 11 year old daughter is blossoming there and Nicole grew up there and is rekindling past friendships easily. Which is very good.
She has a job too, flying out monday for training...and will be looking for a place of their own...have been living with her parents who fight a lot.
The girl will say good bye to her dad who is on house arrest due to child porn on the internet and will be going to prison after his trial.
She doesn't know when they will get back to town again.

Any way, I need to get a shower
and start my day.
hugs to those who need them
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

It's wonderful of you to be so supportive to your friend.
I hope you have a good day today.

WC

[liveforsummer]

Extremely unfocused day and feeling like my brain could just not physically function. Home now and feel MUCH better.

Hugs to all affected by California wildfires

[scatterbrained04]

Not good...

I'm feeling very ill tonight. I've been having mood issues off and on for the last week combined with a cold that just isn't going away.

[Guiness187055]

Day three out of IP. I am just starting to feel normal again sleeping alot though. IP did me no good what so ever they barely even changed my medicine. I was busy worrying about a guy trying to kill me in my sleep. Never again.

[wildflowerchild25]

I lashed out at my son. I hate when I do that. It’s not his fault I’m stressed. I’ve gotten zero work done on my project because I’m too exhausted to do anything. I think it might also be the change in seasons. Maybe mild depression. I don’t know. I’m too tired to think about it.

There’s only one other gastroenterologist in my area that takes my insurance. I’m going to call tomorrow to see if I can get in sooner than January. I don’t want to be in pain for three more months. My abdominal ultrasound was normal, which is good I guess.

[MobiusPsyche]

I think one reason I hate taking showers and brushing my teeth is that they represent a commitment to living. It only makes sense to brush your teeth if you're going to be around for your next dental visit. Taking a shower, for me, means I plan to be around for another three days. These are so difficult for me and it's frustrating.

[Lifeischallenging]

So having a good day. Home is my only problem. My mom just bought phones for my sister and brother-in-law and she put them on her plan. Does anyone on here feel that she is supporting? I certainly do. I'm almost out on one of my meds which is making me a little nervous.

getting new anxiety meds today. yay

putting groceries away

going to shower

um, listen to a lot of music

those are my plans for today

[scatterbrained04]

I've been on the depressed side of things for about 5 or 6 days now. Starting to get a little worried. Feel so alone, and like everyone hates me. Maybe I deserve that. Maybe it's depression talking. I can't do this again this year.

Feeling a bit better... finally. Antipsychotic FINALLY kicked in.

I was going to attend DBSA last night, but I chickened out. I also found out later in the day that I needed to fix something at work, so I spent time fixing that issue instead of going to DBSA since I had to get it done by the end of the week anyway. I kinda used that as an excuse to avoid DBSA, though...

I wish I wasn't such a chicken. I know I need to go to DBSA, but... my social anxiety is theough the roof. And I can imagine I'd have panic attacks going there.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Feeling a bit better... finally. Antipsychotic FINALLY kicked in.

I was going to attend DBSA last night, but I chickened out. I also found out later in the day that I needed to fix something at work, so I spent time fixing that issue instead of going to DBSA since I had to get it done by the end of the week anyway. I kinda used that as an excuse to avoid DBSA, though...

I wish I wasn't such a chicken. I know I need to go to DBSA, but... my social anxiety is theough the roof. And I can imagine I'd have panic attacks going there.

I am glad to read you are starting to feel better!


WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by scatterbrained04

I've been on the depressed side of things for about 5 or 6 days now. Starting to get a little worried. Feel so alone, and like everyone hates me. Maybe I deserve that. Maybe it's depression talking. I can't do this again this year.

So sorry you are feeling down. I truly doubt everyone hates you and you certainly don't deserve it. It is depression talking. Hopefully, you will get relief soon. You have a lot on your plate. What helps?


WC

Work stress getting to me. I’m not feeling like getting out of my car to start my day. I can’t let things bother me this much. I will concur these problems

[Wander]

Maybe my exhaustion is leaving. Both yesterday and today I have managed to be motivated and productive. I am out of bed earlier and don't need to go back, as I have had to recently. Today I studied, went for a swim at the beach, played guitar, rested then worked 5 hours. Now I am listening to music and surfing the net.

So happy about this turn around. I am just hoping it isn't short lived. My mood is fairly neutral so I know I am not heading up. Just aiming for stable.

[Wild Coyote]

It's yet another gorgeous Fall day here! The sun is bright, the air is crisp and the colors are brilliant! This is my favorite time of the year!

I hope everyone experiences some fun and some joy today, somewhere in their day!


WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Wander

Maybe my exhaustion is leaving. Both yesterday and today I have managed to be motivated and productive. I am out of bed earlier and don't need to go back, as I have had to recently. Today I studied, went for a swim at the beach, played guitar, rested then worked 5 hours. Now I am listening to music and surfing the net.

So happy about this turn around. I am just hoping it isn't short lived. My mood is fairly neutral so I know I am not heading up. Just aiming for stable.

You inspire me to keep trying.

(((((( Wander ))))))

To stability!

WC

[scatterbrained04]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

So sorry you are feeling down. I truly doubt everyone hates you and you certainly don't deserve it. It is depression talking. Hopefully, you will get relief soon. You have a lot on your plate. What helps?


WC

I'm not really sure what would help or what to do. Nothing seems to help that much. People may not hate me, but I'm not very well liked. I'm very socially awkward and just not accepted anywhere.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by scatterbrained04

I'm not really sure what would help or what to do. Nothing seems to help that much. People may not hate me, but I'm not very well liked. I'm very socially awkward and just not accepted anywhere.

Sounds very lonely. I often spend a lot of time alone.

(((((( scatteredbrained ))))))


WC