[Unrigged64072835]

Hello! I'm doing okay.

I went off Prilosec and Xanaflex. I've been on Prilosec for ages and I think it's time to wean off of it. Needless to say I've spent a lot of time looking up low-acid recipes and tips. I'm also exercising more and stretching so my back isn't hurting as much. I'm steady now on weight but I think I'll be losing more soon. Still need to find something for dinner tonight because we were supposed to have ribs--bummer! I see my new GP Thursday. He's probably going to not be happy but it's my stomach, not his.

Have to go over the budget later. This was a tight month to begin with and we spent a chunk of money on my birthday already. Ugh! It was fun though and I don't regret it.

Next week is going to be interesting--Labor Day weekend and then a week of medical appointments.

Love and hugs to everyone!

[zijax]

Went on a 4 mile hike with husband of 3 months, my son who's in college and his gf. The hike included a steep mountain, so steep I was crawlling on my hands and knees grabbing roots and rocks. There were ropes to pull yourself up and to keep from falling down the mountain. I am exhausted, my legs and back ache. I want to get in better shape and quit smoking. Oh there was a waterfall at the bottom with kayakers tumbling over class 5 rapids. Cool to watch.

Originally Posted by Innerzone

IRememberMyFirstBee, do you have a link or something for those pillows? I looked but couldn't find. They sound intriguing.

I can’t find it on the Target website. It looks a lot like the pillow in the link, except instead of being 2-sided, it’s a swipe pillow — so you swipe the fabric in one direction and it turns into the other picture. If I find it online, I’ll post it here. Target Is Now Selling A Collection Of Harry Potter Merchandise

Originally Posted by zijax

Went on a 4 mile hike with husband of 3 months, my son who's in college and his gf. The hike included a steep mountain, so steep I was crawlling on my hands and knees grabbing roots and rocks. There were ropes to pull yourself up and to keep from falling down the mountain. I am exhausted, my legs and back ache. I want to get in better shape and quit smoking. Oh there was a waterfall at the bottom with kayakers tumbling over class 5 rapids. Cool to watch.

That sounds amazing.

It is so much cooler today that I was shivering inside the house and had to put on sweat pants, a long sleeve shirt and socks. Hubby's going to the swim hole himself.

Before hubby left, we were watching some of John McCain's funeral coverage. We stopped part of the way through and will continue when hubby gets back. The coverage is available on video online from a PBS broadcast. Though I am not a Republican, John McCain has always represented good in America. He was a truly great example that has left us during a time when what is seen in politics is often disconcerting or even much worse. So far, the speeches/eulogies are touching and remind me of what such goodness is all about. If only there were many more people like him in terms of core values, kindness, and many other virtues. I'm looking forward to watching President Bush's and Obama's eulogies. The fact that they were asked to speak at his funeral says something very important about unity, understanding, and cooperation despite differences. Though I, personally, didn't vote for one of those presidents, I do feel they are both good people.

I was reflecting on what Senator McCain went through as a POW, his other challenges, and his final illness. It inspires me to be grateful that I, too, am a survivor of types of hardships and that I should go forward with compassion for others, and a sense of humor and a mission, however big or small, to use my learning in as positive of a way as possible. I'll try my best.

Wow! This is my one thousandth post here.

[yellow_fleurs]

Just really depressed. I guess it's here to stay. Not sure I am motivated anymore to do things required to get better like try therapy. Worried about the seasonal depression about to kick in.

I feel really embarrassed tonight.

so I got to the fair but was too fat for the rollercoaster

...

my body is in serious disrepair

[yellow_fleurs]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I feel really embarrassed tonight.

so I got to the fair but was too fat for the rollercoaster

...

my body is in serious disrepair

I am really sorry that happened to you and that you are feeling bad about yourself. We care about you regardless.

[Blueberrybook]

Today has sucked. I've been crying 3.5 hours straight. Just something little set it off, and I can't hold everything inside any more. I've just had too much crap to deal with and one last thing was one last thing too many not to mention I've spent 2 weeks straight asking people & organizations for help, and I get turned down again and again. I am trying, yelling, telling people I need help, and no one listens.

My husband distrusts pdocs and diagnoses such as bipolar. It makes everything so, so hard.

At this point, I feel like God hates me.

[Wild Coyote]

Attended a concert last night. Could not sleep at all, too keyed up and in too much pain. Napped for an hour today.

Second opinion on diagnosis: BPII, confirmed

Current status: Mixed Episode.

I hope everyone is having a good weekend.

Love to All!


WC

[bizi]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Attended a concert last night. Could not sleep at all, too keyed up and in too much pain. Napped for an hour today.

Second opinion on diagnosis: BPII, confirmed

Current status: Mixed Episode.

I hope everyone is having a good weekend.

Love to All!


WC

I am sorry you are having a mixed episode.
(((((HUGS)))))

bizi

[*Laurie*]

Originally Posted by yellow_fleurs

Just really depressed. I guess it's here to stay. Not sure I am motivated anymore to do things required to get better like try therapy. Worried about the seasonal depression about to kick in.

I'm terrified of seasonal depression. Feels like I cannot make it through another autumn with it. If it weren't for my cats I would definitely go IP.

[*Laurie*]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I feel really embarrassed tonight.

so I got to the fair but was too fat for the rollercoaster

...

my body is in serious disrepair

I so feel for you. I've gained 125lbs. on Seroquel. Poison. I'm deeply concerned about my health; moving around is becoming difficult. Mental illness is so cruel.

[Victoria'smom]

I need help. why? for what? IDK. I just feel like I'm drowning and no one hears me.

Something is amok. Second night in a row with little sleep. I don't feel energized physically at all, but my mind is full of thoughts, not racing really, but semi obsessive.

I saw an old Saturday Night Live episode. The musical guest was White Stripes from way back when. Jack White is pretty amazing. I've barely delved into his music but really want to. I can't believe he's only a little younger than me. Something makes me wish I could spend three hours alone with him.

His.words and music remind me of my old passion for dance even though neither of the songs on the show tonight were really dancable. It's not that. It's something deep about it, and yet not. And yet it is.

Maybe I'm going to take 50 mg prn regular Seroquel on top of my regular evening meds I took at 7:30 pm five hours ago. I'm feeling unwell.

[yellow_fleurs]

Originally Posted by *Laurie*

I'm terrified of seasonal depression. Feels like I cannot make it through another autumn with it. If it weren't for my cats I would definitely go IP.

That sounds really rough, I am sorry I get it every year since I was a kid and it can be bad, but I have just never started off this depressed without it, and that is what worries me.

[scatterbrained04]

I can never tell if I'm in a normal mood or hypomania? I'm hoping normal because I tend to crash hard after hypomania.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by *Laurie*

I so feel for you. I've gained 125lbs. on Seroquel. Poison. I'm deeply concerned about my health; moving around is becoming difficult. Mental illness is so cruel.

Im afraid of this, too. Pdoc is taking me off seroquel when i see her in 3 weeks. I hope she keeps her word.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Originally Posted by yellow_fleurs

That sounds really rough, I am sorry I get it every year since I was a kid and it can be bad, but I have just never started off this depressed without it, and that is what worries me.

do you use a SAD lamp? My pdoc has had me start using it about this early when I was going into SAD time already severely depressed. I think it helped some.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by scatterbrained04

I can never tell if I'm in a normal mood or hypomania? I'm hoping normal because I tend to crash hard after hypomania.

I have this same problem.
I often wonder how you are doing.
It's good to have you posting!


WC

not much to say about today.

really bad overeating

no sleep

still feel really depressed/ upset that I didn't get anything done at the fair

but I suppose what's done is done, right?

Originally Posted by raging vortex

not much to say about today.

really bad overeating

no sleep

still feel really depressed/ upset that I didn't get anything done at the fair

but I suppose what's done is done, right?

Sorry you're still feeling really depressed.

Are you on meds and/or in therapy? I've noticed that you've been depressed for a very, very long time. You deserve to feel happy, especially after the wringer your abusive mom's been putting you through throughout the years.

Try not to get upset that you didn't get anything done at the fair. The fact you went is a huge accomplishment on its own. Lots of people who are depressed tend to isolate themselves, but you took the right steps by getting out of your flat and doing something positive for yourself.

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Maybe I'm going to take 50 mg prn regular Seroquel on top of my regular evening meds I took at 7:30 pm five hours ago. I'm feeling unwell.

Hope you feel better soon. Let us know how you're feeling in the morning.

Originally Posted by *Laurie*

I so feel for you. I've gained 125lbs. on Seroquel. Poison. I'm deeply concerned about my health; moving around is becoming difficult. Mental illness is so cruel.

I never had the weight gain experience on Seroquel or Seroquel XR. However, one day I started acting "bizarrely" while on Seroquel XR and my pdoc had to increase my dose to knock me down. The problem was that I started to feel depressed shortly after increasing the dose (which my pdoc called a "manic crash"), so my pdoc bumped up the dose again and my depression became so severe that it was literally the worst depression I have ever had in my entire life. No exaggeration.

I had a strong hunch that Seroquel XR was causing problems for me. The depression vs Seroquel XR dosing was no coincidence because my depression slowly increased as the dose slowly increased. So once I got off that med, the depression went away almost instantly (within a few days, honestly). That med was poison for me, just like it was poison for you, except it was poison in a different way.

Well, Seroquel works very well for some people, but its potential side effects can be detrimental to our health and/or mental health. I agree that mental illness is so cruel.