Bipolar Check-in #40

Awoke at 5am still feeling tired but not as depressed as I’ve been for the past 2.5mths. Treatment Resistance, Bipolar 2, Rapid cycler, Borderline Personality Disorder. Praying that the minutes, hrs, day stay good to me..😊

Meds:
Ketamine
Abilify
Wellbutrin
Viibryd
Synthroid
Imovane
Ativan
Foquest

Well, I slept from 8 until 0230, which is unheard of for me. The Seroquel seems to be helping with that. The simplest thing would be to go back to the long-acting Ambien, but I sleep-cook and sleep-walk and sleep-email people on it and I'm sure, since people sleep-drive, that I could sleep-bicycle. It's just not safe, which is a shame, because it does work for me. So, Seroquel it is.

Yeah, Fern, IOP is a good idea. Just not sure about the payment part. I will call St. V's, wher it takes place, and see what the deal is. I did IOP there after my car accident and suicide attempt in 2007 and it was great. So, we'll see.

Sometimes psychotic, I don't know for sure that it is EPS. But my hand are just moving all the time. It's not exactly just a tremor. I don't really know what it is. Will look into your suggestions. Thank you.

Thank you, WC, for your positiviity and prayers. I am into prayer. That's perfect for me.

Just very brief period of voices yesterday, totally doable. Not seeing things. No spirits or whatever sliding under my door. No microphones or CIA people in the hall. So, better. Very grateful. I might be able to manage this.

What I am supposed to make of all this, I don't really know. I have a very serious mental illness and it can flare. Have to be vigilant, I guess. I do tend to crash to the down pole after a big mania, but this time, truthfully, it was more psychosis than mania. So, we'll just have to wait and see.

Again, so very grateful for all the support here. I am honestly not sure if I would still be alive if it were not for all of you. So, thanks. Forever indebted.

Got the green light to get outside. Going to go exercise and see how it feels. Hopefully, it will be a good start to a good day.

Good Morning,

Well I got about 7 hours off kinda disturbed sleep which is a big improvement when usual! I am just sitting here on the computer waiting for time to go. I was feeling drowsy lately however I think I am starting to go back to normal. I am still pretty nervous about the interview however I think its going to go well.

MANY THANKS FOR YOUR CONCERN AND YOUR LOVE!

I am doing better with the chronic pain challenge.

I've just become aware of an additional challenge:*

I am told I have an inflammed liver.

There seems to be a liver issue in our community too often!

My doctors feel medication is the culprit.
My PC doc put a rush on the Ultasound, which is scheduled for tomorrow afternoon. Otherwise, its a 4-6 week wait. I am grateful I can get in earlier.

Love to All!

* Note: Always review your lab results.
We have to look out for our own welfare.
Any abnormalty in the results will be flagged. We don't need to know how to interpret any results to see there may be an issue needing attention.

I'd gotten a bit lazy and felt with 2 docs monitoring my lab results, I'd hear if there was any issue. I was not feeling well, so I'd decided to look up my labs from 2-3 weeks ago. This is when I'd discovered I have a "liver injury."
For a variety of reasons, both docs had missed the lab reports.

I couldn't sleep so I watched tv til the sun came up, or rather until daylight because the sun isn't out today. Then went back to bed for a couple hours. Confused dreams something to do with a huge snake that was a pet to someone. I was in Africa, the Africa of a 1930's book. With huge carpeted tents.

MANY THANKS FOR YOUR CONCERN AND YOUR LOVE!

I am doing better with the chronic pain challenge.

I've just become aware of an additional challenge:*

I am told I have an inflammed liver.

There seems to be a liver issue in our community too often!

My doctors feel medication is the culprit.
My PC doc put a rush on the Ultasound, which is scheduled for tomorrow afternoon. Otherwise, its a 4-6 week wait. I am grateful I can get in earlier.

Love to All!

* Note: Always review your lab results.
We have to look out for our own welfare.
Any abnormalty in the results will be flagged. We don't need to know how to interpret any results to see there may be an issue needing attention.

I'd gotten a bit lazy and felt with 2 docs monitoring my lab results, I'd hear if there was any issue. I was not feeling well, so I'd decided to look up my labs from 2-3 weeks ago. This is when I'd discovered I have a "liver injury."
For a variety of reasons, both docs had missed the lab reports.

So glad to hear you are doing better with your chronic pain but concerned about your liver. It’s great you can get in tomorrow. What is the remedy for an inflamed liver? Thinking of you.

MANY THANKS FOR YOUR CONCERN AND YOUR LOVE!


I am doing better with the chronic pain challenge.


I've just become aware of an additional challenge:*



I am told I have an inflammed liver.


There seems to be a liver issue in our community too often!


My doctors feel medication is the culprit.

My PC doc put a rush on the Ultasound, which is scheduled for tomorrow afternoon. Otherwise, its a 4-6 week wait. I am grateful I can get in earlier.


Love to All!



* Note: Always review your lab results.

We have to look out for our own welfare.

Any abnormalty in the results will be flagged. We don't need to know how to interpret any results to see there may be an issue needing attention.


I'd gotten a bit lazy and felt with 2 docs monitoring my lab results, I'd hear if there was any issue. I was not feeling well, so I'd decided to look up my labs from 2-3 weeks ago. This is when I'd discovered I have a "liver injury."

For a variety of reasons, both docs had missed the lab reports.

Today turned out to be a nightmare. Situation Normal: All Fd Up!

I can't even describe it. I'll just say, as an aside, that in addition to having to have cancelled my last two therapy appointments because of family issues/crises, I had to cancel my psychiatrist appointment for this Friday at 2 pm. I did leave a message for him asking for a cancellation time, if available, later today, tomorrow, or Friday morning. If none are available, I don't see him until the week after Thanksgiving. This is not even the snafu. Just one side result of it.

My brother got home from the hospital last night. He arrived at my father's room at the assisted living place when I was there. He overhead the snafu and was so upset that he left quickly.

Friends, my dad accidentally (I hope accidentally) created a most painful situation for my siblings and me.

I'm too afraid to even tell my husband.

Today turned out to be a nightmare. Situation Normal: All Fd Up!

I can't even describe it. I'll just say, as an aside, that in addition to having to have cancelled my last two therapy appointments because of family issues/crises, I had to cancel my psychiatrist appointment for this Friday at 2 pm. I did leave a message for him asking for a cancellation time, if available, later today, tomorrow, or Friday morning. If none are available, I don't see him until the week after Thanksgiving. This is not even the snafu. Just one side result of it.

My brother got home from the hospital last night. He arrived at my father's room at the assisted living place when I was there. He overhead the snafu and was so upset that he left quickly.

Friends, my dad accidentally (I hope accidentally) created a most painful situation for my siblings and me.

I'm too afraid to even tell my husband.

Today turned out to be a nightmare. Situation Normal: All Fd Up!

I can't even describe it. I'll just say, as an aside, that in addition to having to have cancelled my last two therapy appointments because of family issues/crises, I had to cancel my psychiatrist appointment for this Friday at 2 pm. I did leave a message for him asking for a cancellation time, if available, later today, tomorrow, or Friday morning. If none are available, I don't see him until the week after Thanksgiving. This is not even the snafu. Just one side result of it.

My brother got home from the hospital last night. He arrived at my father's room at the assisted living place when I was there. He overhead the snafu and was so upset that he left quickly.

Friends, my dad accidentally (I hope accidentally) created a most painful situation for my siblings and me.

I'm too afraid to even tell my husband.

(((((( BirdDancer and Family))))))

I am bothered by the fact that you have been asked to deal with so much in such a short time. I both have a lot of faith in you and am concerned as well.

We are here for you!

A little bit ago, I called the location's director at the place we WANTED Dad to go to and literally begged them to help me. I even started crying and told her that if something isn't made easier that I may end up in the IOP, too, and my brother may die of a heart attack or stroke. Luckily, she did calm me down a bit. She's the clinical director of therapy. She did give me one suggestion (for the other location). I left a message there to follow up on that suggestion. The first time I tried, the recorder cut off after like 10 seconds. I called back again and gave a rapid-fire message, that time getting my name, my dad's name, my phone number, and "Please call me back" in before it cut off.

I'm still afraid to tell my husband about all of this.

I wish my psychiatrist would call and offer me an alternate appointment.

Here I am listening to music with my new stereo setup.. I am listening to Enya. I have been killing time. When I think of doing my tasks today, a paralysis sets in. It then takes effort to move forward, me being "stuck in the mud". I have just started to work on this today with my pdoc. He thinks I have ADD,, with evidence starting in grade school. This can explain allot. I am waiting for money to come, but I have no idea that it will. It is either this, or working for Uber.