[Nammu]

Didn't gamble. . I'm against the house winning my money! we just went to the restaurant.

Mum just spent 15 minutes trying to figure out the coffee pot. It's 10:30 at night! No wonder she has trouble sleeping!

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

BirdDancer, yes thanks !!!!! there should be no trips coming up anytime soon.

We met my daughter tonight for dinner, she is moving tomorrow in with a couple friends for a few weeks until the apartment is ready . She’s moved 10 times in the 9 years she’s been back in Florida. She is tired of roommate situations. Shes willing to cut out a lot of things in her life to be able to afford it.

Steve has gotten some bad news about some of the people, growing up , they all use to go camping as kids for 10-12 years. Anyway one of the parents has stage 4 lung cancer and her husband had to be put in a nursing home as his Alzheimer’s is in the combative stage and no meds are helping... it’s such a terrible way to go for both of them. I’ll let him go do any visits he needs to do for them..

Last night i had massive acid reflex ! I get it off and on here and there. Last night was truly the worse ever , I truly felt like I was dying. So much acid hit my lungs I had to use my husbands oxygen, steve says I looked terrified..I was so close to having him take me to the ER ! My throat is very raw sore and my lungs are on fire ! Hopefully I will fully recover by tomorrow.

Hugs to all !!

Oh, that sounds terrible. Are you on any meds for that? I've forgotten the name of the OTC med the doc recommend. Begans with a p. But anyway it's helped a lot.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Nammu

Oh, that sounds terrible. Are you on any meds for that? I've forgotten the name of the OTC med the doc recommend. Begans with a p. But anyway it's helped a lot.

I have Zantac ( now they say it can cause stomach cancer and pulled it off the shelf but I still have some) I took that and then antacid tums pills and even the liquid , just awful ! I truly hope that it Is gone for good !!! It’s not common thankfully. Was awful!!

I can barely talk my throat is so damn sore lol

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Thanks, bluebicyle! I have read a couple articles on what to do, but a video would be good to look for. I'll do that. I think it really will be a simple fix. I'm guessing once it is done we'll be kicking ourselves in the butt for not trying earlier. We'll see.

You're welcome

Just my personal opinion, but based on the plumbing work my dad has done -- and he is not a plumber -- most fixes are relatively easy. It's just that sometimes you need a tool that only plumbers have. However, I myself have bought plumber tools at Home Depot for $30 or less, like when I wasn't paying attention and flushed paper towels down the toilet. Or, when my shower drain was clogged with hair, I bought draino. Much better than spending $200+ on a plumber or waiting for one to arrive when my dad needed a new hot water heater installed.

Also, another thing you could do -- and I just thought of this -- is ask Home Depot guys for assistance on what you want to do. The people in the plumbing, lighting, etc departments are pretty knowledgeable. They want to sell you things in the store, rather than call one of their own plumbers, electricians, etc. because they are affiliated, not actual plumbers hired by the store. But yes, you can get plumbers etc for a discount at Home Depot. We got a plumber from them that came in 24 hours.

bluebicyle, I just wanted to let you know that my husband seems to have fixed our toilet issue. Thanks for the encouragement! 😘

I hope you and all others are doing well (or better) today.

Originally Posted by Nammu

Didn't gamble. . I'm against the house winning my money!

That's the way I see it too! They've got enough money already and their not getting their mitts on MY hard-earned, thankyouverymuch!!

Things are going well. But I did have a rough day at work yesterday (The way mistakes are brought to my attention very much tends to make me feel stupid. Which is followed by feeling incompetent and catastrophizing thinking I will get fired for being so stupid. Which in reality, I'm not. Still, my mind goes there.)

But today will be great, right?! We shall see!


MANY, MANY, MANY HUGS TO ALL WHO ARE SUFFERING!! It breaks my heart when bad things happen to such good people.

[Sunflower123]

Checking in. The holidays went well aside from being sleep deprived. M is leaving today which has me down in the dumps. Exacerbated by sleeping less than 4 hours last night.

Aside from spending time together, my sidekick and I made great progress on a home project that I had stalled on. I’m thrilled.

I’ve signed up for several meet ups in January. I should have a full schedule between those, exercise classes and bible study. I’m working on my goal of building a fuller tribe. Fingers crossed.

Warm wishes to all for a peaceful weekend and hugs to those that are struggling.

[xRavenx]

I feel really bored and isolated. I am an introvert and can go long periods of time being alone, but this is getting to the point where I know it is unhealthy. There aren't that many people in my life anymore, and it's hard to meet people. Plus, I have trust issues as a result of my past. Just felt like getting that off my chest.

Hugs to all in need.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by xRavenx

I feel really bored and isolated. I am an introvert and can go long periods of time being alone, but this is getting to the point where I know it is unhealthy. There aren't that many people in my life anymore, and it's hard to meet people. Plus, I have trust issues as a result of my past. Just felt like getting that off my chest.

Hugs to all in need.

I totally related to you on this stuff, Raven. I will go days and days without uttering a word to anyone but the TV or my puter. It's just the way it is for me. Wish I had some magic solution for us. But I don't. Hang in there. At least we have PC, which I am so grateful for.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by xRavenx

I feel really bored and isolated. I am an introvert and can go long periods of time being alone, but this is getting to the point where I know it is unhealthy. There aren't that many people in my life anymore, and it's hard to meet people. Plus, I have trust issues as a result of my past. Just felt like getting that off my chest.

Hugs to all in need.

I also totally relate to this.

Hugs to all who would like a hug.

[~Christina]

Today is the last day in the area where the kids live. Tomorrow going North to see my brother. Then on to our friends house George and Alice, altho Steve has said a couple times we might just stop for a visit and then just head home, I would be fine not staying , It was very uncomfortable last visit

I just hate living out of a suitcase !

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Today is the last day in the area where the kids live. Tomorrow going North to see my brother. Then on to our friends house George and Alice, altho Steve has said a couple times we might just stop for a visit and then just head home, I would be fine not staying , It was very uncomfortable last visit

I just hate living out of a suitcase !

I hear ya about the suitcase!

Well, you're heading north. It's always nice to be heading in the direction of home.

[Nammu]

The wedding was nice. Very nice venue. A golf club , but a small one. Very nice decorations with birch bark and evergreen s. Had two drinks again. Don't drink for years then drinking whiskey sours! Can't believe it's only 7 ish! Feels like a long long day.

[xRavenx]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

I totally related to you on this stuff, Raven. I will go days and days without uttering a word to anyone but the TV or my puter. It's just the way it is for me. Wish I had some magic solution for us. But I don't. Hang in there. At least we have PC, which I am so grateful for.

Thank you, bpcyclist. I hope you start to feel better as well. Yes, I definitely wish there was an easy answer. I am so grateful for all the support here at PC. It really means a lot to me. Hugs to all.

[Underdevelopment]

Its sad when you realize you've had to shrink your world so small so as to only talk to yourself. I know that at least a little of that reality. Living by myself with no support network other than what the state provides. Others cannot relate unless they live it. Not people here, but people in general. Even specialists, who, wellmeanibgly, try to push you beyond what you know is good for you on any given day. Where only you and white noise exist. Thank goodness for the Internet and PC.

Keeping away from people, or not being able to go out amidst despite a desire to do so is incredibly crushing mentally. It cripples even simple things like getting milk or bread. Please don't take these limitations to heart. You didn't choose the life or illness you fight.

I hear your pain, because this isn't the reality you want. I'm glad you find some solace here amidst PC friends.

Day by day, minute by minute. And too... don't forget, someone like me will come along hours later, read your post and suddenly not feel quite so alone.

For that I thank you

Xx

[Moose72]

i just got my long post eaten. Going off to skulk....

[Underdevelopment]

Originally Posted by Moose72

i just got my long post eaten. Going off to skulk....

hugs..

[Moose72]

@~Christina When I've had fudge fail- mostly not setting up- I eat it with a spoon or put it over ice cream, too! I also have had water in my lungs once, too. It was this last year sometime: I was drinking out of a fountain really fast and I gasped for air but I breathed in the water! Well, my body objected and I started coughing like CRAZY! Whooping on the "in" breaths! And nobody would come see if I was ok! This was at the building where I see pdoc.

N1 has changed her name (yet again) to Noel. It goes back with the "N" theme of all 3 kids' names.

Speaking of Aliens, I've had that sleep paralysis when I was a teenager. No fun! I used to be quite scared of aliens. Now I just get scared of entities in my walls. My pdoc said "You were really out-of-it!" Referring to that day.

Christmas was ok. Got most of my presents from one friend- a mani-pedi, a squishy faux down comforter, a nice winter coat... He wants to get me an exercise bike but I'm beginning to wonder if he won the lotto or something!

Been talking with Caleb on the phone a lot lately- even today as he had to work today and thats when he usually can talk- while he's at work driving a recycle/garbage truck.

Ii guess that's all for now. I did catch up on reading all the posts. Plus, I worry my SSI will be taken away if I'm not "sick enough"- i.e. haven't been hospitalized in the psych ward this year. I almost was when manic back in May but pdoc just sedated me with high amounts of Seroquel.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Moose72

@~Christina When I've had fudge fail- mostly not setting up- I eat it with a spoon or put it over ice cream, too! I also have had water in my lungs once, too. It was this last year sometime: I was drinking out of a fountain really fast and I gasped for air but I breathed in the water! Well, my body objected and I started coughing like CRAZY! Whooping on the "in" breaths! And nobody would come see if I was ok! This was at the building where I see pdoc.


N1 has changed her name (yet again) to Noel. It goes back with the "N" theme of all 3 kids' names.


Speaking of Aliens, I've had that sleep paralysis when I was a teenager. No fun! I used to be quite scared of aliens. Now I just get scared of entities in my walls. My pdoc said "You were really out-of-it!" Referring to that day.


Christmas was ok. Got most of my presents from one friend- a mani-pedi, a squishy faux down comforter... He wants to get me an exercise bike but I'm beginning to wonder if he won the lotto or something!


Been talking with Caleb on the phone a lot lately- even today as he had to work today and thats when he usually can talk- while he's at work driving a recycle/garbage truck.


Ii guess that's all for now. I did catch up on reading all the posts. Plus, I worry my SSI will be taken away if I'm not "sick enough"- i.e. haven't been hospitalized in the psych ward this year. I almost was when manic back in May but pdoc just sedated me with high amounts of Seroquel.

There’s no reason to worry about losing your ssi, the ups and downs that you have been able to mabGe while out patient still will show your just it able to get and maintain gainful employment. So try to stress to much about it.

[bpcyclist]

Lay down at around 830 pm and was wide awake at, oh, 1015 or so. Same old. Going to be seeing pdoc soon, so hopefully, we can get a game plan. Don't think it's the Provigil, since we have stopped that before and sleep improved not one bit. I hate to d/c the Wellbutrin, as I am terrified I will crash hard and be all full of SI again. I have some serious attempts in the past and do not want to go there.

Anyhoo, sorry I am a broken sleep record and I am quite sure people are sick of hearing about this, since it never changes. Don't blame anyone for that. Oh well. Whaddayagonnado...

I haven't posted my own update in a while...

I am doing okay. My sleeping schedule is messed up quite a bit, though. I keep getting like 4 or 5 hours one night, and the next, I'll get like 12. It's awful. I mean, I feel fine (minus a headache and minor withdrawal), but I keep sleeping through my scheduled bedtime med time. So basically, I am only taking my meds every other day.

I tried to put an alarm on my phone last night, but my stupid phone did an update because I had it plugged in! Thus, the two alarms never went off.

I am going to set up an actual alarm clock because my phone is unreliable. Either the alarm on my phone doesn't go off because all my apps crash, or there is an update of some sort that causes my phone to get stuck at the "Hello/Hola" screen. It's getting that bad.

At first, I thought I was sleeping through my alarms, but then I realized that wasn't true. I did some alarm app testing on my phone by setting the alarms to go off 1 minute later and the alarms would crash when it was time to go off. Thus, a regular ol' alarm clock is the best option.

[Moose72]

Last night I had vivid dreams. I dreamed I was at the hospital having a 2nd-trimester miscarriage. Everything was 100% vivid - ow it felt, how everything looked. After I miscarried the baby did live for a while, crying, too but it was just too young- especially since there were not pediatricians around from the NICU. Then, I woke up and when I went back to sleep I dreamed about being in a concert hall where the local boychoir was giving a concert. I saw my high school choir director in the audience and went to tell him about the miscarriage, showing him the fetus in a jar of formaldehyde.

One wonders about my brain sometimes!

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Bad bear ''shouldn't'' speak

Hey Fuzzy!

I enjoy reading what you have to say. I prefer it when you speak! Your sharing more openly lets me get to know you much better!

You have not written anything to be sorry about.
You are very articulate.
I hope you will continue to share your thoughts, reactions and more with us!

My brother called me. My nephew (who is in IOP) took my sister to the ER for psych-related issues. She also has bipolar disorder, but my b-i-l's behavior is surely the main trigger, according to what my brother said. That's definitely not hard to believe as he has a history of verbally and emotionally abusing my sister, living nephew, and late nephew.

My dad apparently called my brother demanding to go home from the assisted living, prematurely. We don't know what (or who) triggered that. We do not want or need that at this time. I told my brother to tell our dad to think about his children for a change, instead of only himself himself himself, which has been his lifelong tendency. We fear one of his vulture cronies may have influenced his sudden 180, but we're not sure. My brother will examine the visitor log. We have the power to do so.

I will not get involved with my father. My siblings know my involvement during such times does more harm than good. I do feel guilt given my siblings current health issues. I have reached out to my sister, leaving a vmx. I will be there for her.

If our father goes home, I especially feel for my brother since he lives in our dad's house. It's hard, folks. I love my brother. I'd probably want to invite my brother to stay with me, temporarily, if it came to it, but I believe my husband would possibly object. I love my brother dearly, but his extreme stress and anger can sometimes be quite triggering, itself. My family has always been...I can't even think of the right word.

My sister has been doing the lion's portion of the work regarding our father. I can't help but assume that contributed, too. It has to stop. If my dad does go home right away, he will be on his own. It's a hard decision to make, but we must take care of ourselves and not let ourselves be taken all the way down in the process.

[wildflowerchild25]

I had three dreams about self injury last night it’s really messing with me. In one,

Possible trigger:

I actually bled. Most of the time when I cut in dreams the skin just splits but this time I was bleeding. It ****ed me up even more.

I’m out wheeling with RS today trying to forget about it. I don’t know why I’m all of a sudden getting these dreams again. I don’t like it.