Bipolar check in #45

Hi Wild Coyote,

I’m very sorry about the shingles and the severe allergic reaction to the meds.

As you know I have severe allergies also (to many things) including various meds. What you said about meds with a similar molecular structure makes a lot of sense to me, I have experienced allergies to several meds with a similar molecular structure to the first med I became allergic to.

I support your informed decisions. I’m sending love and positive thoughts for healing

My own thoughts and beliefs are starting to really stress me out, as are the voices. I'm trying to relax, but I just feel so stressed out about everything.

Judging and labelling is the opposite of Love...

Hey Blue You have been dealing with delusions and feelings of paranoia for weeks now.. Maybe remind yourself that you have and nothing bad has happened ... Might help you with grounding and fact checking a bit

Ahhh sounds like a great day ! Im glad the medication is working for you Pizza?? Yummmy!

Well such rough days I have been having ! My pain , but thats just what it is.. My husbands illness, Hes really been struggling, this finally started breaking up in the last few days which is great but over night as he sleeps , every thing just really clogged up in his lungs, I checked his oxygen level while he was sleeping about 5am, his color was off and he was at 86 with oxygen on, so ABG level was probably 83 at most

So I quickly brought him his nebulizer and made him do a treatment. it brought him up to 92 ...

I have been mentally pacing back and forth today if he should get a chest xray today.. When we talked to the Doctor on Thursday I asked them to send an order to the hospital for a chest xray in case I think he needs one over the weekend, this way we would avoid the ER altogether.. Drive to Hospital just walk in, go to xray dept and walk right back out... This is a perk of small town Doctors and Hospitals..

I think I am just going to have to check him every few hours when he is sleeping and wake him to do a treatment if his numbers are too low.. But I have to be watchful as the nebulizer meds can spike his blood pressure.. Its like walking on a tightrope juggling knives lately

Hope everyone is enjoying there day

I just sent a message to a friend about that other forum. I went back and nothing has changed. It’s not a place I care to spend much of my time.

I send kind thoughts to all other “HSP’s” here. Being sensitive is not a flaw any more than being direct is a flaw.... it is a trait and I think often both “styles” can learn from each other.... (and I am not saying that being sensitive and direct cannot coexist. I am not an expert in relationships. I am trying to learn

I have been taking “too many” prn meds at night again. It’s a cycle I go through every 2 months. (near enough) ...I will try to cut down tonight. I’m safe, it’s just too tempting to get a decent nights sleep. But then .....

Respect and kind thoughts to all

What talk was this?

I managed to do a bit of art today - and a bit of editing. ...both for a friend in Kentucky. She's applying for the Holman prize from the San Francisco LightHouse for the Blind and Visually Impaired. I'd share her art-making vid but I'm not sure if doing so would be appropriate since she's not dealing with bipolar disorder.

I’m sorry Steve is so sick and your pain is agony right now! He’s very lucky to have you and I know how much you love him

Ooooh, how exciting to be involved with that! I hope she wins.

I haven't been getting to nearly as much art as I would like to be. It IS a great feeling when you do get into it, isn't it?!

Oh man, you guys SOOOOO deserve a break!! My magic wand is not so magical as I wish it were(!) But I'll be waving it your way with very best thoughts possible even so. Who knows, maybe it needs to be a certain day of the week to activate the magical powers!

I'm so glad you thought ahead to get that ordered. One less thing to worry about, and great thinking on your part.

Be sure to do some self-care, ok? It is so easy to forget at such times.

Lots and lots and lots of

Ahhhh IZ Ill take half faulty magic wands right now too

Yeah things are so tough.. I think once he is finally headed fully into recovery I will probably fall into a heap for a bit...

Years of working in medical I know alot and try and stay one step in front of things.. My Doctor is wonderfully and hes not a jerk that just brushes off my observations and is fine with my being so proactive about Steves medical care... Im very grateful..

Thank you so much for the support

Hope your staying busy or enjoying more down time during this damn Plague

This afternoon, my sister, brother, and I will have a video meeting with a lawyer that specializes in issues relating to the elderly. My dad. My sister found the lawyer, and from what I read he looks professional. My sister had initially jotted down some questions/topics for him, and I added a number to that list. Of course we wanted my brother to review it and add anything, but he predictably never did. I need to ask my sister to send the outline to the lawyer. The conversation needs to be organized and thorough. I'm a little nervous about it, and I'm sure my siblings are, too. Generally, I do most of the talking, because, well...I talk the most and am more used to leading meetings. I do worry my brother might get overly worked up by some topics. Throughout his life he has had intermittent explosive tendencies. Some issues relating to our father may affect him since he lives in our dad's house, and it's clear that he wishes to take it (and the property) over someday. Inheritance issues are sensitive ones. The possibility that all of our Dad's savings (and even property) could eventually be eaten up in the future, if he needed a nursing home or stays much longer in assisted living. Thus, the lawyer. It's sad that our father's cognitive state is one where us kids have to start planning. Dad may still ultimately have the final say, but he has wanted us to take over most things. He has repeatedly expressed fear of returning home and many of the usual responsibilities needed to care for himself. So many things are TBD. We really need this pandemic to end to get closer to final answers.

This is really hard and scary! When you're younger, you never think that you'll be in such a position having to help a parent. My sister has experience helping her sons. Neither my brother nor I ever even had children.

I was in bed yesterday from 5:30 last night until about 8 this morning. I feel better then I did this weekend. Although my symptom are for sure still there. My mom is trying to get me out of my funk by trying to get me to go out on walks. At least I’m watching sitcoms instead of the news. I see my therapist in a bit and then my Pdoc at 3. Hopefully they can both help.

Christina, So funny about the olives! 😂Every time I order pizza I get green olives on it instead of black.. ever try the ones stuffed with garlic? I buythose great big ones.
You must have an awful lots of frozen potatoes...that’s a lot of potato pancakes... of course there is shepherd’s pie, too. Do you like pirogies? You can make kind of a pierogi lasagna with layers of mashed potatoes, steamed cabbage and onions. Goes great with corn beef. Potato bowls...I’m getting hungry, brb.

Ok there...

I took to heart a lot of what was said here about your clay work, doannacd. I think it goes for every hobby, everybody, that it is the process as well as the result. Putting something aside and coming back to is is something I do all the time....however that’s why I have so many unfinished projects!

My dr took me off lamictal, which I had been on for years, too. I switched to latuda and so far so good. I’m fiddling the dosage now. Having a phone consult suits me so much better with her. Why get dressed to go out, drive to her office and sit in the waiting room for a 15 minute med check? She faxes the prescriptions straight to the pharmacy. I’m going to see if she’ll do this on a continuing basis. My therapist is another story. I need face-to-face with her.

Just starting on here, I can’ go back to far to reply to much but I am reading your stories and sending

Haha, yeah, I've got unfinished stuff from years back cluttering up my little creative corner. Actually, that's been the best part of this time off work, I'm getting lots done. Whether feeling good or ill, I try to do a little bit of something creative every day. Now, no promises it won't get thrown out when I stop to look at it, but I'm trying.

I hope the med change proves helpful for you. I've certainly been through that.

I really relate to a lot of this, BD. I hope your meeting goes smoothly.

My father is in his late 80s and in a very nice retirement home. He is quite wealthy and I don't believe ti is possible for him to spend as much annually as he earns, due to his net worth. That will come to my jerk brother rand myself when he goes to meet his reward. But you know what? I don't want his money. I hope he lives forever and spends every last penny.

Thanks, bpcyclist! It was an over hour-long zoom meeting. The lawyer seemed personable and professional, and hopefully trustworthy. A little fast-talking, which made it tough for me to follow with my brain as it is, today. My brother was fine. Nevertheless, it was a lot to process. The fee options weren't really that bad, considering. We just need this pandemic to ease quickly. We may even try to get this going before it lets up. It's hard to have a family meeting during this time.

That's great that your father has few worries. We thought my father's financial situation was much better than it is, but we discovered financial mismanagement, some financial exploitation, and hyperspending affected that. We just want to protect his house and property and have a plan in mind for various care options for him. We may or may not do a "nest egg" protection. Maybe. In any case, we need to get some of the holdings into a trust. It would be best if my sister took control over his major financials. We all trust her. We're not counting on any big inheritance. We just want protections for our dad, and some guaranteed reasonable care situation for the future.

I don't know that my dad is "rich" but if he has any money I'm not expecting any when he passes on. I figure everything is left to my sister. But who knows. Just my dad.

My dad's dad did have a lot of money but he gave moat of it away to some groups that he shouldnt have- but it was his money I guess.

I'm not sure why but I'm worrying about people conspiring against me to get me kicked out of my apartment. I hear people talking, I don't know for sure what they were saying but I'm assuming that's what it was about. People are always whispering about stuff

Everything is overwhelming right now. I started the new dose of trilafon today. I don't know how that's going, maybe it needs more time, I don't know.

Yeah, I've felt like that before and med changes do help me most of the time.

I say give the med a few days to see if things are gradually getting worse on this new dose. Sometimes I tend to get panicky when I start a new med dose, and then my thoughts go down a bad path because I'm letting them spiral out of control. So, the best thing for me to do when I'm like that is to find something else to focus on while I give the med a few days to work itself out. Distractions, distractions, distractions. I don't expect to be 100% better after only a few days, but things should (in theory) get better after a few days, even if they're only a tiny bit better. If things are getting worse after like 2-3 days, then I'd say you should definitely let your pdoc know.

I'm finally bringing my mountain bike to my apartment this week! I actually decided to throw some crap in my garage to make space for my bike *inside* my apartment.

I'm currently trying to buy some commuter tires for my bike since I'm not a fan of using mountain bike tires on paved trails. I also need a new helmet since mine is expired. Then I've got to clean up the bike (although I may actually just have the local bike shop take care of that).

Looking forward to biking no later than this weekend! 'Bout time I did something with my bike. jeez.