[Moose72]

I'll be 49 in a few weeks. Not on any upcoming lists for the vaccine.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I'll be 49 in a few weeks. Not on any upcoming lists for the vaccine.

Have you tried "waste lists"? That's what I'm doing. A lot of places will take your information and if they have extra vaccine at the end of the day they'll call people from the list (which have no age or health requirements) so they don't have to throw out vaccines. I called 7 places today and got on 4 places plus left one message.

I had to laugh today because i felt i'd had an adventure by going to a different mall for lunch when @Soupe du jour has moved house and home across the ocean and that is a REAL adventure! I'm sorry to read the expat hike got postponed. I know you were really counting on it and looking forward to it. But i know you'll enjoy it when it happens. Making your own friends will make a real difference.

You're so busy setting up your household and that has to be the priority but carving out an hour a day sometime soon for language learning will probably increase your comfort by an order of magnitude. Books are fine but i so enjoyed the Mango Languages flash card app and hear good things about Duolingo also. "Faites attention a les innondations sur les routes." That's French for, "Beware of flooding on the roads." Not super useful... But fun!

I felt less sedated today. I don't know if it's the benzo taper or just the sunshine but i'll take it. Do you know they have music in the mornings?!

I've been to a few mental health ZOOM events over the past couple days and enjoyed myself. My dog is quite the attention w!or3 and wants to be on camera with me almost the whole time. The events have been good company.

[*Beth*]

whatever2013 I used to listen to classic rock throughout the night. They played the best music between 10p.m. and dawn.

I was awakened by a neighbor choking and coughing, she had probably drunk water and it went down wrong. I couldn't tell which neighbor it was, I just heard her coughing and coughing, like she couldn't catch her breath. I felt a sense of alarm because I didn't know what to do. Call 911 and say Someone behind my apartment is choking, it could be 1 of 6 places...I hope she's okay by now. I feel rotten because I couldn't think of what to do.

[Soupe du jour]

Originally Posted by whatever2013

I had to laugh today because i felt i'd had an adventure by going to a different mall for lunch when @Soupe du jour has moved house and home across the ocean and that is a REAL adventure!.

Whatever, I should have commented on what you wrote about yesterday.

You know, it is true that my adventure is a big one, right now, but one should never minimize the importance of so-called small adventures. In fact, I believe my life has been richest, in many ways, because of my ability to appreciate small adventures. Or, make/perceive small adventures out of what many consider routine events. After all, how many huge adventures do we get in life?

[Mountaindewed]

I am very tired today. Also I got my injection an hour ago and I’m pretty nauseated and light headed for some reason. It freaks me out even more about the vaccine when this happens. I’ve been lying in bed a lot of the morning but I did take a brief walk earlier. I’m doing laundry and I took a zofran and I just plan on hanging out today. I feel pretty good overall though. These last 2 days I’ve been missing my old T more then usual. I just need to remind myself to tell all this stuff that’s been happening, to the new T.

My mom is out of the house shopping and she went to Target and found cotton candy Twinkies.

I really want to go out to eat at this one specific restaurant and I’m sure it will be ok but I’m still so nervous about eating out. I see other people eating out and they are ok. It’s still tough knowing if I’m being too careful or not.

I finally pet the cat and his fur where he was shaved is so soft. I thought he would feel really bristly. But he feels like a stuffed animal.

Edit: I feel a lot better now. I am not tired or feeling sick anymore. So I assume it might have been a reaction to the shot since it happened half an hour after getting it and I was ok before.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed

....
I finally pet the cat and his fur where he was shaved is so soft. I thought he would feel really bristly. But he feels like a stuffed animal.

They really do feel like a stuffed animal. The undercoat of a cat is sooo soft.

I have been having al ot of dark thoughts about mothers day tomorrow (UK)

I wish I knew how come their's a mothers day, but not a day for people who have been abused by their parents to be recognized. it's all I can do not to gag at the comercials for flowers and cards.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I have been having al ot of dark thoughts about mothers day tomorrow (UK)

I wish I knew how come their's a mothers day, but not a day for people who have been abused by their parents to be recognized. it's all I can do not to gag at the comercials for flowers and cards.

I'm sorry, rv

I have had the same thought, especially about Father's Day. These "holidays" are money-makers for cards, shops, groceries, online shopping, and so on. So many people feel left out. Although I know it won't happen, I'm all for doing away with such foolish holidays.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

The weather has been pleasant lately, where I am. Sunny or mostly sunny, but cool. It does feel like spring is on the horizon. I suddenly have a bit more energy than before. Right now it's just fine. I'll have to watch it, if it rises more.

We took a pleasant walk. There are trails all around where we live. Every time we take walks we discover something nice or at least useful. Where we walked there is a garden park, a special reserve where specific plants, a type of lizard, and bird dwell that are not seen many other places. We found a site where you can take dump type stuff (tires, electronics, over-size stuff), and an ice skating rink/gym center.

I feel like I've been doing the bulk of the cleaning tasks, lately. I do almost 100% of the work in the kitchen. I'm softly encouraging Hubby to do more "unpacking/set up" work in the house. I'm sick of moving boxes. I'd even like to see some art on the walls.

I'm still getting used to my new kitchen. I went from gas stove/oven to electric. I hate the stove top! Today I attempted to use my cast iron (yes, cast iron) grill pan on it. At one point while it was preheating, I turned around and then heard a loud crack. The darned iron grill pan cracked like the Liberty Bell in Philadelphia. I could only exclaim "Oh my God!!!!" Hubby heard both the crack and exclamation from upstairs and came down to see what happened. He rightly stated that it was better that pan (empty) than a Dutch oven filled with boiling goulash.

Oh I am glad your getting out and finding some neat stuff !

Yes Hubby needs to be helping to unpack for sure. Id go mad having boxes here and there.

Ohhhh Electric ??? I grew up using it, Well we moved here and Gas OMG I love it, When we went to Florida we had electric and I burned stuff left and right. I hate the though of ever using it again. I love my cast Iron , I would have likely started crying..

Hope he helps and yes get art on the walls

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

I’m going to my daughter’s college graduation in May and I’m already preparing for it. I want to try out a new hair style and I don’t know whether to try it now or closer to time. I’ll have to sit by my ex-husband which will be deeply unpleasant. I’m already working on a plan of action in therapy.

The vaccination went smoothly. I had fatigue within a few hours but that’s it. I slept 9 hours last night and feel great today. I understand the second dose is where you could see flu like symptoms. I’ll be happy when it’s over and I’m protected for the most part.

Oh treat yourself and get that new style now. I had to sit next to my ex when my daughter graduation, I was really worried about it. But we both focused on Amanda, Hopefully it will be the same for you.

I got my first shot of Moderna Thursday that day was fine, Next day sucked and today is still sucking, but better than catching Covid.

Take good care of you

[~Christina]

Happy for you Moose !

[~Christina]

I finally caught up

Hugs and Love to anyone in need.

I think I have mostly recovered from concussion, Well I still have some issues, but I am grateful I didnt break anything when I fell

I got my first Moderna shot Thursday, was fine, woke up in terrible pain in injection arm and it spread across my chest and into other arm , Totally exhausted ( still am) today woke up all my joints hurt some I can actually see.. But still better that catching Covid!!!! Steve is getting his shot Monday .. Hopefully he will have no problems.

Hugs love and cookie to all

For twenty years now i've struggled to get enough protein in my diet because i like to be as vegetarian as possible. It's hard because i don't cook. I tried the protein powders and protein shakes but they made me sick. Tried texturized vegetable protein. I swore off beans in August when i attempted to cook with them and it was a disaster. I've been making do with cheese which has a lot of calories and getting about 50% of my protein quota, which does nothing to help my muscle-wasting (54 woman).

But i plucked up my courage today and retried beans and I LOVE THEM!!! I'm so happy because they are inexpensive as well. I'm really thrilled! They're very filling also. I've felt sated for hours.

They're not low-cal tho. That's a myth. But they're high in fiber and that's another dietary goal of mine. So i'm just so pleased to have expanded the horizons of my diet!

I went in the ZOOM Drop-In again today and there was this really sweet woman who PMed me about my hair which i just got cut, she's very sweet and loving. There was a conflict and a man got angry and flounced out and unfortunately the leaders did not handle it well. Well, i guess there's fights on ZOOM just like in real life. Sigh!

I was up and showered and had my dog walked before noon! Who am i?!

It's my last night on 16mg of Valium in my benzo taper and i think i WILL go ahead with the next cut as even tho every night has not gone smoothly, i've had ENOUGH nights of decent sleep.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

I got my first vaccine today! I put my name on a bunch of "waste lists" yesterday where they call if they have vaccine that will go bad if not used. I got a call at 2:15 that Walmart had a shot for me if I could be there by 6. No problem. So I went and have one dose of Moderna and an appointment for the 2nd one April 14.

I'm so excited. Being in Walmart was the first time I've been in a store besides CVS to get my clozapine in a year and a week. It seemed so bright and loud and chaotic. But it won't be that long and I'll be able to safely shop and be part of that chaos myself if I want to. I can't wait to just drive to a store and get things if I want them instead of either ordering from Amazon or waiting for our occasional pick-up orders from Walmart grocery.

So excited about this!

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

I finally caught up

Hugs and Love to anyone in need.

I think I have mostly recovered from concussion, Well I still have some issues, but I am grateful I didnt break anything when I fell

I got my first Moderna shot Thursday, was fine, woke up in terrible pain in injection arm and it spread across my chest and into other arm , Totally exhausted ( still am) today woke up all my joints hurt some I can actually see.. But still better that catching Covid!!!! Steve is getting his shot Monday .. Hopefully he will have no problems.

Hugs love and cookie to all

I hope you feel much improved by tomorrow

There are quite a few of us getting our vaccines this coming week!

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by whatever2013

For twenty years now i've struggled to get enough protein in my diet because i like to be as vegetarian as possible. It's hard because i don't cook. I tried the protein powders and protein shakes but they made me sick. Tried texturized vegetable protein. I swore off beans in August when i attempted to cook with them and it was a disaster. I've been making do with cheese which has a lot of calories and getting about 50% of my protein quota, which does nothing to help my muscle-wasting (54 woman).

But i plucked up my courage today and retried beans and I LOVE THEM!!! I'm so happy because they are inexpensive as well. I'm really thrilled! They're very filling also. I've felt sated for hours.

They're not low-cal tho. That's a myth. But they're high in fiber and that's another dietary goal of mine. So i'm just so pleased to have expanded the horizons of my diet!

I went in the ZOOM Drop-In again today and there was this really sweet woman who PMed me about my hair which i just got cut, she's very sweet and loving. There was a conflict and a man got angry and flounced out and unfortunately the leaders did not handle it well. Well, i guess there's fights on ZOOM just like in real life. Sigh!

I was up and showered and had my dog walked before noon! Who am i?!

It's my last night on 16mg of Valium in my benzo taper and i think i WILL go ahead with the next cut as even tho every night has not gone smoothly, i've had ENOUGH nights of decent sleep.

GREAT news on your benzo cut AND on the beans!


Sorry about the stress on zoom...yes, it seems that online life is simply a microcosm of IRL. I've had some of that occur today. Nice about your hair, though

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

I got my first vaccine today! I put my name on a bunch of "waste lists" yesterday where they call if they have vaccine that will go bad if not used. I got a call at 2:15 that Walmart had a shot for me if I could be there by 6. No problem. So I went and have one dose of Moderna and an appointment for the 2nd one April 14.

I'm so excited. Being in Walmart was the first time I've been in a store besides CVS to get my clozapine in a year and a week. It seemed so bright and loud and chaotic. But it won't be that long and I'll be able to safely shop and be part of that chaos myself if I want to. I can't wait to just drive to a store and get things if I want them instead of either ordering from Amazon or waiting for our occasional pick-up orders from Walmart grocery.

So excited about this!

Terrific! Let us know how you feel over the week-end. I'm getting my vax on Tuesday and I'm going back and forth with anxiety.

I hear you - the last time I was in any kind of store except a grocery was a year ago.

[*Beth*]

Spring forward tonight! (Seems like we just did fall back.)


I won't lie; I'm experiencing a degree of discomfort about the dissension that went on on this board yesterday/today. I hate when that kind of thing happens. It makes me anxious and sad. Anyone who says that being online isn't the same as real life....

SO. Moving forth. Vax on Tuesday. I have Advil, ramen noodles, Dramamine, ZzzQuil, and will be getting Gatorade and soda crackers. I want to be well-stocked, just in case I don't feel well.

A gorgeous spring day, my laundry is done, now it's time to tackle dishes and clean the kitty fountain

[bizi]

Originally Posted by BethRags

Spring forward tonight! (Seems like we just did fall back.)


I won't lie; I'm experiencing a degree of discomfort about the dissension that went on on this board yesterday/today. I hate when that kind of thing happens. It makes me anxious and sad. Anyone who says that being online isn't the same as real life....

SO. Moving forth. Vax on Tuesday. I have Advil, ramen noodles, Dramamine, ZzzQuil, and will be getting Gatorade and soda crackers. I want to be well-stocked, just in case I don't feel well.

A gorgeous spring day, my laundry is done, now it's time to tackle dishes and clean the kitty fountain

we try to clean the kitty fountain one time a month but sometimes go longer and then it is really gross.
bizi

[bizi]

help,I am running low on patience with myself.
I have been drinking alcohol...alot.
I tried to have a dry march and made it 5 days.

sigh
how can I stop????? anyone out there with suggestions?
bizi

[buddha1too]

Originally Posted by bizi

help,I am running low on patience with myself.
I have been drinking alcohol...alot.
I tried to have a dry march and made it 5 days.

sigh
how can I stop????? anyone out there with suggestions?
bizi

I can't really give you any solid suggestions. I was on the PsychCentral forum for many years & remember you from the addictions thread, though. Have you considered touhing base with anyone from that thread?

I haven't touched a drink in a decade & then some, but feel everyone has to make up their own mind to stop. Going to AA helped me, but I know that's not a very popular choice for a lot of people. If I recall correctly, you've stopped for fairly long periods in the past, so I'm sure you can do it again. I do know that mixing meds with alcohol is a pretty self-defeating & potentially dangerous behavior. Maybe keeping that in mind might help? Anyways...I don't preach. Good luck, bizi.

[Blue_Bird]

I got my 2nd Pfizer vaccine shot yesterday. Had no side effects just like with the 1st one. Glad to be fully vaccinated now.

My mood has been low. I’m struggling with

Possible trigger:

sui thoughts

but I’m trying to ignore them.

I had a major panic attack today with some dissociated feeling, I guess my brain kind of like checked out for awhile. Then I ate a banana and it smelled and tasted like chemicals so I got paranoid about that. But I’ve had olfactory hallucinations before, so that’s not new just something I haven’t dealt with in quite awhile, normally it’s just the auditory and tactile.

My doctor is having me start clozaril. I’m scared to be honest but things have been getting bad and I’ve tried so many other APs that she thinks it’s time to try this last resort one.

I’m scared of the medication killing me or giving me strange/scary side effects. Plus I have to taper off Thorazine and trilafon. And I just came off of topamax a day ago because I was having problems with that. So there’s lots of changes going on. Idk it’s just a scary time for me.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

e.

My doctor is having me start clozaril. I’m scared to be honest but things have been getting bad and I’ve tried so many other APs that she thinks it’s time to try this last resort one.

I’m scared of the medication killing me or giving me strange/scary side effects. Plus I have to taper off Thorazine and trilafon. And I just came off of topamax a day ago because I was having problems with that. So there’s lots of changes going on. Idk it’s just a scary time for me.

I know clozaril is scary sounding but it's not that bad once you are used to it. The blood work is annoying for the first 6 months and then isn't so bad. I'm at 5 years in and I really don't think about it anymore.

The risk of having problems with the white blood count is very, very low. My pdoc hasn't seen it happen. It's kind of an old rule that they check it so carefully; they just are too afraid to move on from the monitoring according to what I've read.

The side effects aren't bad. The only 2 I hate are that I drool in my sleep (manageable) and I have some incontinence at night (manageable with pads). No big deal. I did go on Metformin to help with weight gain/keeping my weight stable. That helped until my family member died in December and I gained weight while grieving. I need to work on that but there's time.

If you have questions feel free to ask. Like I said I've been on it 5 years and in that time I haven't been IP, I have only had mild episodes and much of the time I've been pretty stable.

I do understand the anxiety, btw. I had a hard time going on it but once I did I was glad I did.

[Blue_Bird]

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

I know clozaril is scary sounding but it's not that bad once you are used to it. The blood work is annoying for the first 6 months and then isn't so bad. I'm at 5 years in and I really don't think about it anymore.

The risk of having problems with the white blood count is very, very low. My pdoc hasn't seen it happen. It's kind of an old rule that they check it so carefully; they just are too afraid to move on from the monitoring according to what I've read.

The side effects aren't bad. The only 2 I hate are that I drool in my sleep (manageable) and I have some incontinence at night (manageable with pads). No big deal. I did go on Metformin to help with weight gain/keeping my weight stable. That helped until my family member died in December and I gained weight while grieving. I need to work on that but there's time.

If you have questions feel free to ask. Like I said I've been on it 5 years and in that time I haven't been IP, I have only had mild episodes and much of the time I've been pretty stable.

I do understand the anxiety, btw. I had a hard time going on it but once I did I was glad I did.

Thank you for this, I really appreciate it. It’s good to know someone has had a good experience with it. I get overly paranoid about any new med I take I guess, and then of course that white blood count thing scared me. But I’m glad to hear it’s not common.

Thank you, I’ll be sure to check in here and let you all know how it goes. I’m hoping it’s helpful because I really need something to bring my stability back.