Bipolar check-in #56

leomama · Jun 27, 2021, 12:50 PM

@buddha1too I relapsed due to not going to meetings, I’ve got multiple programs but I had to reset my sobriety date due to a relationship with an alcoholic. I thought I could manage my mood without medication. Now I’m on three just to get back to normal .

Nammu · Jun 27, 2021, 12:51 PM

Buddha, I seem to post in waves. Don’t know that there’s much rhyme or rhythm to the postings. Today we have my granddaughter’s birthday. She’s 4 Monday. Her party is today tho. Mermaid themed with an actual mermaid. ( okay so it’s a young woman from the yoga studio who dresses up) should be fun to watch.

Nammu · Jun 27, 2021, 01:03 PM

Buddha I’m sorry so much has been happening maybe you should keep the AP for at l week beyond your wife’s retirement. Just to keep somethings the same and not change too many things at one time. Yeah retirement is stressful. Hope you can find ways to adapt to each other both being home 24/7. It’s a challenge but like you said before you both got though the pandemic well.

buddha1too · Jun 27, 2021, 01:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by leomama

@buddha1too I relapsed due to not going to meetings, I’ve got multiple programs but I had to reset my sobriety date due to a relationship with an alcoholic. I thought I could manage my mood without medication. Now I’m on three just to get back to normal .

I'm glad you're back on the bus! It's hard to get back on sometimes, but you're still working at it. Good luck!

Mountaindewed · Jun 27, 2021, 01:03 PM

@buddah1too I’ll have to admit last night I took one to help me sleep. But every night before that I took one because of pain. The ER doctor told me that it was ok to take it with the Valium as long as they were spread apart from each other. My last Valium is usually between 2-3 in the afternoon and the muscle relaxer I take is always around 7.

I took just Tylenol for pain today.

*Beth* · Jun 27, 2021, 01:12 PM

Thank you so much, Buddha.

I'm hurts to hear that your mood is going south. Do you think your AP is contributing to depression?

Mountaindewed · Jun 27, 2021, 03:58 PM

I’m kind of down right now. I’m using a heating pad on my stomach to see if that helps. I have no idea If heat is actually proven to help with anxiety, but if it works it works. I did take my meds and an extra Valium. None of which are making a difference. Maybe I’m just expecting too much of the Valium. It says it’s quick working but maybe it does take longer then 10 minutes to work.

I was thinking of getting chili’s or pizza for dinner but since I don’t use food to cope with my emotions I don’t think it will make a difference in how I feel. Plus I’m not too hungry anyways.

I’m hoping to get some major relief and some good news tomorrow. When I “get”my “period” and can call around for therapists.

leomama · Jun 27, 2021, 04:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by buddha1too

I'm glad you're back on the bus! It's hard to get back on sometimes, but you're still working at it. Good luck!

Well it’s not hard when you’re not dating an alcoholic/addict.

Moose72 · Jun 27, 2021, 05:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed

I’m kind of down right now. I’m using a heating pad on my stomach to see if that helps. I have no idea If heat is actually proven to help with anxiety, but if it works it works. I did take my meds and an extra Valium. None of which are making a difference. Maybe I’m just expecting too much of the Valium. It says it’s quick working but maybe it does take longer then 10 minutes to work.

When you take meds by mouth, it takes at least 20 minutes to work.

~Christina · Jun 27, 2021, 06:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sapien

Ughh, I'm stuck. I really should give my meds to my mom but then I'd have to give ALL my meds to her including the old klonopin and other meds I've been stashing in my room. I'm okay with giving everything but hte klonopin up, but I'm not safe with the amount I have left. I'm thinking like take a couple pills out and put them with my pill boxes and just have that and if I run out I'll ask for more. She should understand that. I probably shouldn't even be taking the klonopin but I think last night it was safer than staying in an impulsive, rageful mode with suicidal ideation.
I gotta figure out something to do for the rest of the night. I have a drawing I've been working on but it kinda sucks and I started it at least three months ago and just tossed it aside but I want to finish something for once.

Years ago I had needed my husband to hold my meds. I filled up a weeks worth in a med box and had zero access to any amount that could actually hurt me. Honestly it takes alot of strength to hand over meds when you are just not safe. Take good care of you

buddha1too · Jun 27, 2021, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BethRags

do you think your AP is contributing to depression?

That's a possibility, but my sleep has improved a bit. I will hold off on stopping...especially because I'm on a relatively high dose. There's also been a lot of situational stuff going on. Thanks for your concern, Beth.

~Christina · Jun 27, 2021, 06:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BethRags

Dreadfully hot temperatures. The early morning is the only time I can open windows, get some fresh air in my apartment, and the kitties love to sit in the windows and sniff the outside air. By 11a.m. it's close all windows, turn on a/c and fans for the rest of the day and night.

My level of anxiety is down - thank you perphenazine - although I do have waves of gripping anxiety each day. The difference is that the waves are slightly less intense, and tend to pass fairly quickly. I'm working on remembering to relax my shoulders and take calming breaths when I feel anxious.

I have put word to my apt. manager that I'd like to move within the complex to an upgraded apartment that's available. It would be $100 more/month, which worries me, but I so like the newer apartments, and they're easier to keep clean. It sounds like I'll be able to make the move, but I'm waiting for the final "yes."

Beth I give you huge props for being able to open your windows until it becomes to unbearable. Our home is 2200 sq ft. I keep all the registers closed to the 3 bedrooms back there. Even so It would cost a ton more for me to turn off and on. Even going on the porch is becoming difficult for me at times. I despise the heat.

Im very happy to know that your anxiety is getting more tolerable.

Oh I would certainly move also. Sometimes a new place can make such a huge difference. When will you hear if you get it or not???

~Christina · Jun 27, 2021, 06:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

I'm beat! It's heading towards 7 pm. I barbecued chicken and veggies for dinner, and that was as much as I could manage after eating.The kitchen is a bit of a mess from all of my other cooking projects, but it will wait.

Hubby put up our new ceramic outdoor sculpture. A photo is attached. We love it! It's sort of like a bird bath (I'm sure one will go there and poop on it), but its value as a grounds sculpture is the main appeal to us. We choose it because it is like a broken eggshell within a broken eggshell. The whole piece has a textural design that is sort of like tree bark, but also like bird's feathers. It is placed next to our house's side entrance in a little garden area. We drove to Bohemia last weekend to pick it up. The ceramic artist made it just for us. She's wonderful! We also bought a bowl she made for my husband's sister, as well as a small sculpture I put in my kitchen. By chance, that artist made a lovely piece that my sister-in-law gave us some years back. She confirmed it was her work.

Tomorrow I will weigh myself again. I did so last Sunday and saw that I had gained a lot of weight. I'm hoping I shed a good amount. I've been tracking and pre-planning all of my meals these last seven days. I stayed within weight loss ranges every day. Obviously any loss will likely include some water weight loss, but some will be fat. I feel less bloated.

Beautiful !!!

~Christina · Jun 27, 2021, 07:02 PM

Buddah Thank you so much for the kind words

I agree with the others .. right now might not to a good time to reduce meds until things level off with lots of changes coming

~Christina · Jun 27, 2021, 07:07 PM

Wash Rinse Repeat

Nammu · Jun 27, 2021, 07:44 PM

Was a nice party. Just 5 girls. My daughter had two inflatable pools and a unicorn that sprays water out of his horn. The girls all had swim suits on for the time outside with the mermaid. They ran though the water and listened to the mermaids stories and got crowns to wear. Then they changed back into their dresses and came indoors for cake and the opening of gifts 🎁. My granddaughter hugged my mum out of all the people there for her gift. That was so cute, totally adorable and spontaneous. I think it made mum’s day. For the finish there was a mermaid piñata, for that my grandson joined! 😃

buddha1too · Jun 27, 2021, 07:55 PM

Very cool, Nammu! What a wonderful day for everyone.

Nammu · Jun 27, 2021, 08:03 PM

Yes it was nice, the weather cooperated. It rained about 30 minutes before the party then the sun came out. It was in the 70’s so not too hot! Nice 😊

leomama · Jun 27, 2021, 08:13 PM

My ex boyfriend said I seemed blunted or subdued the last two days and he blames the Wellbutrin. I said first of all I’m intense so if I’m subdued , good! Second of all I doubt it’s the antidepressant , I think it’s the seroquel or lamictal , however he did notice it the first and second days I took the Wellbutrin. He’s against antidepressants because he had a bad experience with Prozac.
Also last night I didn’t take seroquel to sleep and I did have racing thoughts around 4 in the morning so I’m definitely taking it tonight .

Moose72 · Jun 27, 2021, 08:56 PM

Warning: maybe TMI for everybody- especially the guys.

For several days now I've had very painful, sensitive nipples. Feels like when a baby can't latch correctly. Tonight, they ached like they were full and I expressed some colostrum on both sides! That shouldn't happen! So now I will have to call my primary doctor about this and see if she wants me to also see my gyn. I don't think I need a pregnancy test because I had my tubes blocked AND have a Mirena IUD which is supposed to keep periods away- haven't had one in about 5 years! This IUD (Mirena) is at the end of its life at 5 1/2 years old. Anybody had this happen? I know that Risperdal caused my breasts to ache like letdown though there was no discharge at that time. I breastfed all 3 N's for a total of about 5 years within about as much time.

Any thoughts/ideas? I'm going to call my primary doctor in the morning.

bizi · Jun 27, 2021, 09:09 PM

Getting ready to take a trip to see my family in Indiana.
Am a bit anxious about this. For three days I will be

staying at my folks house in northern IN.
I asked mom what she wanted me to do to help with

the yard. She wants me to weed the area in front

of the bay window in the living room and the bricks

in the front of the house, it is actually the back of
the house. It is an old farm house. Mom has many
garden beds to tend to and she loves working in
the yard and cooking, she is a great cook.
My sisters live in the state and help out going up
monthly to help with chores. They are a big help.
I feel bad that I can't help out living 1000 miles a way.
I have extra klonipin to take if I need it.
We have 7 nights booked into a hotel. Everything

is so expensive, renting a car, air flight, hotels.
This will be the last time that we will fly because

of my e-credit from a canceled trip due to covid.
That is until we take a big trip overseas to
celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary.
anyway,I have not seen my folks in a year
because they canceled christmas last year,
due to covid fears. They are in their 80's so I get that.
It will be good to see my sisters and Brother-in-law too.
I will be traveling with jeff so that is good. I hate traveling alone.

Thanks for the support.
bizi

BeyondtheRainbow · Jun 27, 2021, 09:11 PM

Have a good and safe trip Bizi

Soupe du jour · Jun 28, 2021, 01:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by leomama

My ex boyfriend said I seemed blunted or subdued the last two days and he blames the Wellbutrin. I said first of all I’m intense so if I’m subdued , good! Second of all I doubt it’s the antidepressant , I think it’s the seroquel or lamictal , however he did notice it the first and second days I took the Wellbutrin. He’s against antidepressants because he had a bad experience with Prozac.
Also last night I didn’t take seroquel to sleep and I did have racing thoughts around 4 in the morning so I’m definitely taking it tonight .

I definitely relate and agree that it can be good to calm down intensity, a bit. Most all of my life I was high octane. Though it had its advantages, it also had major detriments.

Soupe du jour · Jun 28, 2021, 01:31 AM

Bizi, I hope you have a lovely visit with your mom. Weeding is actually a rather pleasant chore, in my view. That's exciting that you will soon reach 25 years with your spouse. Where do you plan to go for that occasion? If you don't mind me asking. I remember you writing that you visited some of my neck of the woods in the past.

Soupe du jour · Jun 28, 2021, 01:36 AM

Moose, I get such soreness at times during the month. I hope it's just a temporary hormonal issue. That will be good to have it looked into, though, if it's persisting.

I didn't have Mirena, but had a copper IUD in the past. It did affect my monthly, making it unreliable and very heavy. I ended up with iron deficiency. In the end, it didn't work out.

Menu

Bipolar check-in #56

My Support Forums