Bipolar check-in #69

I also saw it in the theater and wanted to cry throughout the entire thing. The part where him and the mail man have their feet in the pool really got to me.

No I can’t believe it! I’m not ready for summer to end. I dread winter and the long dark nights. Already we have to close the curtains too soon. Winter coats and boots, ugh 😩

I don't recall your Richard Simmons story. What is it?

I'm with you! But what's worse than winter coats and boots is having to scrape snow and ice off my car. Hate hate hate that!!

I think there were two- a movie that I also saw in the theater and a documentary on DVD. I don't remember which is which but it made me cry to see Mr. Rogers talking to those kids- I felt I was a preschooler again and it just brought back memories.

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Originally Posted by Sunflower123 I went for a follow up with the doctor per his request Friday and I do have three deficiencies and three infections including one in my lungs. I felt chided for being sick and had to defend myself that I am eating well and resting (excessively here lately). I may like my alfredo pizza on occasion but I start each morning with a healthy smoothie chock full of nutrients and go on from there. I don’t know how I came to be in such poor condition aside from possibly years of stress and more recently grief. I think me feeling so poorly physically had a lot to do with me being so down the other night. I feel like **** right now. Not well enough to see M this weekend unfortunately even though she is in town. Not even close. I hate that. Ah well….another time. Mom misplaced her car keys and I’ve searched as best I could considering. I don’t know how to resolve that for now until I’m feeling better. There’s a few things I need to get resolved soon. I MUST get back on my feet. At least we’ve had somebody come in to clean today. I’m locked in the den as I’m not up for socializing. One thing I know….I WILL get back on my feet and be better and stronger for it. Never again. Thanks for listening. It’s helped me feel better. I hope everyone has a peaceful day. Much love

Oh, my gosh! Maybe the deficiencies and infections are part of what's been causing you to feel unwell.

I understand about getting back on your feet, but resting is every bit as important.

I hope your day is peaceful, too.

In the 80's in an airport in LA my aunt was giving my 2 young cousins Twinkies and Richard Simmons came over to her and started yelling at her and basically harrasing her about how bad twinkies are. I mean first of all she was traveling alone with 2 kids under the age of 10 who were probably pretty tired. Second of all he should have been minding his own bussiness.

Oh yeah, even driving in that stuff! Last year a fed ex box was blowing across our yard in the snow. I got all dressed up but used my regular boots and I sunk down with each step I took getting more and more snow inside my boots. But I caught the package and secured it to the neighbors porch. But just ugh snow. I wish it only snowed on Christmas Eve and in the mountains for those who like to ski. I’m getting depressed just thinking about it. Long dark nights that are cold. I should go sit outside, it’s beautiful today. Mid 70’s sun and a bit of wind. Perfect holiday weather I hope people are out enjoying it.

Yeah…I’ve heard you and @Moose72 talk about snow before. Must be a real bear sometimes. Would love to have a little bit more here. Not as much as you get but more.

113 degrees predicted for Tuesday. Even the air conditioner turned down low and every fan blasting won't truly cool my apartment down. I'm tired of a/c, I'm tired of fans. I sure hope the power doesn't go out because I have Sidney's insulin in the refrigerator and the insulin has to stay cold.

I took a covid test and it came out negative. I don't know what the result would have been 3 weeks ago. I don't really feel like I've had covid. I think I caught some rotten virus. I'm definitely on the mend; the biggest problem I'm having at this point is my lower legs aching. It's painful and makes me feel like crawling into bed. I'm desperate to skate, but my legs just feel too shaky still.

Vali and Foxy

Cool pic. Very nice. I’m sorry about your lower legs. Hopefully you’ll be back to skating in no time. Fall and winter are a coming. Hang in there.

TRIGGER WARNING.













I just keep getting more and more depressed these last 2 or 3 weeks. I mean my sister died of bone cancer 01/04/2020 and my brother was murdered 06/24/202 then my wife died 111/18/2021. My depression just keeps getting worse. I have not suffered from suicidal ideations since 2015 after my last attempt. I am now suffering from suicidal ideations but I won't act on it. This might sound dumb but I have not ridden my motorcycle for over a month because it is broken. She finally went into the shop yesterday and I hope it is a quick fix and thank God for my 2 year warranty. I also have a clunking coming from the front end and I found out there is a recall for that problem.
I got my wife's Honda Rebel 300 started today just need to find the new license plate and stickers and I am off for a ride. I really miss my wife she was my best friend and my entire world revolved around her.

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The get together at my mom's was okay. I tried getting pix of N1 and N2 but N1 got annoyed and I really only got one good one of N2. I think last year's pictures will have to stay. *Sigh*

What is the story of vali and foxy?

I am shocked it is going to be that hot for you on tuesday.
I wonder if this is a sign of things to continue in this heat wave.
I am sorry @*Beth*
bizi

Every summer gets hotter and every winter there is less - almost no - rain. I don't know if you've seen the news lately, but we're breaking records like crazy out here. It's gone from weeks to almost months of every day over 100 degrees. Tuesday will be 113, I hope and pray the temperature won't stay that hot for days or weeks. But I know it will be November before we feel a real sense of cooling...hopefully. And now there's a wildfire north of here, so here we go with that.



Vali Myers was an artist who painted and hand-lettered the most spectacular art. She was Australian, but lived on a mountainside overlooking Positano, Italy. She had been a ballerina & was less than 5 feet tall. Vali had all sorts of pets, including a red fox called "Foxy." I don't know who did the image of her up there ^^^, but here's her own artwork. Look at that color and detail!:






and here, she is holding Foxy:

Call the Midwife is one of my favorite shows, too. But I feel like I've already seen Season 11... @BeyondtheRainbow and @Nammu...hasn't Season 11 already been out?

It has but only on PBS which I don't have. I've seen some spoilers and it sounds like a good season.

I'll be watching on Netflix this month.

I’m pretty sure but not positive season 11 was the last one I watched. I’m thinking the Christmas episode will be in December then season 12 starts

It seems like this past week has had a "No good deed..." theme. I've got another entry. I was in my local grocery store picking up BBQ sauce and ranch when a woman comes up asking for money to buy food. Having the ability to be generous, I asked her specifically "Simple meal. What do you want for dinner?" She asks for lunch meat. I guess she had bread. I told her I would buy her the lunch meat and threw in the few items she had in her cart.

I didn't have cash on me (You can guess where this is going.) and was not going to pay the fees on a grocery store ATM, but she very helpfully and repeatedly made me aware of its existence. I could hear the irritation in her voice when I wouldn't go to it. She hid it with others, but not with me oddly enough. I hope I'm wrong and I'm being needlessly suspicious (I've been in the asking strangers for grocery money position myself.), but I'm not sure I am. We were both committed, me to my good deed and her to her... ? Maybe she was trying to con me. Maybe she didn't get the memo about "Beggars can't be (pushy) choosers." Maybe she was moody for lack of food (Again, I've been there.) All I know is that interaction didn't sit right with me.

Work was equally contentious. Only had four phone sales for a Saturday and immediately had to take back three of them because of other phones being brought back for stupid reasons, including one person who insisted FIVE times that she knew what she was doing when buying a phone with no connection to her carrier. She brought it back angry that it didn't work. $50 loss.

Another was due to a broken phone not activating properly. In other words, old phone had no service and the new phone wasn't active. I couldn't return it as that would risk her phone number being lost. I took over an hour troubleshooting the issue, which effected no change. I finally had to replace the phone and service (That activated in three minutes this time.) which resulted in a $75 loss to my sales, a lost phone number for the customer and served to make me look like I'm incompetent and a liar. I talked up how quick and simple and easy it would be. The last one was a "whoopsie" by a Walmart worker that resulted in the wrong phone being sold and a $150 loss to sales.

REALLY crappy day!

Tomorrow, I meet my mom for Sunday service like we usually do and then we go on a small road trip! She's spending the Labor Day holiday with extended family and wants me to take her. I'm okay with that and I get lunch out of it!

I've got an idea for a trip of my own the two of us can take. The musical Hadestown is doing their big national tour and it's coming to my neck of the woods soon. I figured a couple of nights up there in an Airbnb, tickets for the two of us and generally a fun time! She's the reason I enjoy mythology, history, musicals, etc., which Hadestown covers in spades! Hopefully, it'll work out.

I haven't had much to report these past days. Just waiting. I've kept myself very busy meal planning and tracking what I will and ultimately did eat. This is always the best and necessary way for me to lose weight, and I did. Nine days ago, I weighed 4.4 lbs more than I do today. Right now I have meals planned through Tuesday morning.

Hubby and I have started to exercise a bit more to train. Once we move near s-i-l, we can't be needing a horse to rescue us from the woods. She's even older than Hubby and leaves some young folks in the dust, when she exercises. The last time I walked with her, we walked 12 km (7 1/2 miles) in the woods. Only the desire to survive and get home to pee allowed me to make it. Of course she said she pees in the woods, but that's not my thing. That walk was like a daily thing for her.

Theres this woman I know whos a bit older then me who exagerattes her medical conditions. She has a feeding tube for some reason and is always taking selfies and pictures of herself and her supplies and stuff. Then her best friend has factious disorder and I just learned last night that now she also has a feeding tube for some reason.
Idk but I find their behavior super super disturbing. And the fact that they seem to play off each other makes it even more strange to me.

I am legit struggling not to lose anymore weight and to get enough calories in and its freaking me out at the idea that I'll be sent IP. I lost a bit more weight today and I barely even got out of bed yesterday because I felt off. I don't know whats going on and neither does my mom. Today I feel better and I got my room cleaned and my laundry put away. I organized my big mess of a storage rack I use as a pantry. I took the boxes of pork rinds and Lays chips off the top shelf since there were only a few left in each box. That left almost the entire top shelf for me to even out the rest of the rack. It still looks full, but it looks less cluttered.

Then I ordered some Yankee Candle Halloween melting scent cups for my candle melting thing I got from a thrift store in 2016.

Calorie wise I'm doing ok so far although I may be at a bit of a standstill.

Sunflower, you have been exhausted for years and then came the death of you brother at the top. It is not helpful to eat healty if other things in your life are not healthy. I don't know if you know that, but there is a stong link between our mental health and physical helath and the other way around.

I googled for a link for you about the topic and found this: Connection Between Mental and Physical Health.

When you have more energy, perhaps you can google more about the topic yourself.

I am glad you have access to good doctors that take your case seriously.

Best wishes for your health!

Sorry to hear about all this! Please take care of yourself.

I am sorry on your behalf, Beth. The worst I know is too high temperatures.

Thinking on you!

Hi, I feel down, down, down! I did partake in a religious forum where I tried to help a person. The person was ungrateful and turned the whole thing around blaming me

Now I am angry at myself for being so vulnarable.

I need to protect myself better ...

A continued good day to everybody else!