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#26
Jan 04, 2025, 01:17 PM
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If i have too much caffeine, i am EXTREMELY uncomfortable. Its like my brain gets very blinky and twitchy. I do have a mild form of epilepsy which is controlled by topamax (prescribed by accident) and when i have had too much caffeine, i am in hell.
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 raspberrytorte
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#27
Jan 04, 2025, 03:27 PM
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Thanks everyone for being so nice to me.
My husband asked me how my night was before he left for work this morning and I put on my big girl panties and told him it was good. I told him I was fine. I don't want to worry him by telling him in actuality I'm freaking the fck out. I can drink soda and green tea and be fine, but not coffee. Coffee makes me anxious for some reason. I'm still paranoid. I distracted myself by doing my regular chores and texting with people, and I'm listening to music with my headphones on. My husband told me to avoid reflections and writing because that has a tendency of making me worse. I'm currently in bed with the covers over my head. The sinister being is watching. It always is. I actually slept a bit better last night. I only got up three times, but the third time (3am) I couldn't fall back asleep.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "I'm scared. I'm old. I want to go home!" 😁 - anonymous |
| unaluna
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#28
Jan 04, 2025, 03:41 PM
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I love my therapist. I really do. But sometimes I feel like she dismisses my symptoms, like when I was hypo and hypersexual and she said it was just my hormones.
I don't feel RIGHT and she's blaming caffeine. I'm just telling people I'm FINE from now on. I feel ashamed of the way I feel for some reason and I don't know why. The world is out of focus. I can't tell my husband this. He'll just worry about me and I don't want to stress him out. I hate feeling this way. I was going to take a shower, buy the dishwasher is going and using up all the hot water so I have to wait.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "I'm scared. I'm old. I want to go home!" 😁 - anonymous |
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#29
Jan 04, 2025, 03:48 PM
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Eyes in pictures are becoming sinister for some reason, like they're all staring at me.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "I'm scared. I'm old. I want to go home!" 😁 - anonymous |
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#30
Jan 04, 2025, 03:53 PM
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Quote:
__________________
Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
| raspberrytorte
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 raspberrytorte
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#31
Jan 04, 2025, 03:58 PM
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Caffeine can make bad symptoms worse. Just for the sake of argument, maybe try going caffeine-free a few days, and see if it lessens your paranoia at least some? Caffeine can make anxiety worse, so it could perhaps worsen the FEAR factor underlying the paranoid thoughts?
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Bipolar 1, PTSD, anorexia, panic disorder, ADHD Seroquel, Cymbalta, propanolol, buspirone, Trazodone, gabapentin, lamotrigine, hydroxyzine, There's a crack in everything. That is how the light gets in. --Leonard Cohen |
| raspberrytorte
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| raspberrytorte, volsinchy
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#32
Jan 04, 2025, 04:23 PM
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Quote:
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "I'm scared. I'm old. I want to go home!" 😁 - anonymous |
| June08
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#33
Jan 04, 2025, 04:39 PM
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I took a prn seroquel. It might help me calm down and it might not. It's a hit or miss with seroquel and I.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "I'm scared. I'm old. I want to go home!" 😁 - anonymous |
| June08, Nammu, Victoria'smom
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#34
Jan 08, 2025, 10:44 PM
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Caffeine is terrible for me. Aside from the bit in chocolate I've not had any 17 years. I stopped it because I was using it to get hypo and then that was inevitably leading me into my usual dysphoric mania and that's just no good. I do much better when that is just not a temptation. It's extreme but it's really important for me.
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Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
| raspberrytorte, unaluna
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#35
Jan 09, 2025, 09:24 PM
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Caffeine aggravates my paranoia very much , especially if I have it in large quantities like when I was having 6-7 cups of coffee a day. And it makes my sleep worse. Which in turn makes my anxiety and paranoia worse.
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| unaluna
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