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#351
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Also, I find that who I am changes radically depending on who I'm with. However when I'm alone I have no clue who I REALLY am (am I kind? Am I cruel? Do I really like metal or do I love opera? Etc... (I couldn't think of better examples)).
I also find myself lying a lot for no real reason or simply to have a story to tell. Are these characteristics of BPD? Thanks again! |
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#352
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Quote:
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#353
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That really says it, doesn't it?! I'm new to recognising I have this disorder, and possibly another (in process of being prof'ly diagnosed), and it's so good to read things like this and be able to show it to my husband ... No wonder it's such frickin hard constant internal work just to function everyday...!!
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#354
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Thank you for that description. I related to it perfectly with the single exception of the last paragraph which as it may be a common thing to see in BPDs, is a little out there so I don't consider myself out of the range of this just because the last paragraph doesn't apply to me. Anyway. Posted it in my notes on Facebook. Hopefuly this will help people in my envirement understand my behaviors. Not making any excuses but mearly explaning myself.
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#355
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I have SI and will do it again if given the chance such as now as I will look for the knives
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#356
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Frantic efforts to avoid abandonment:
I have got to the point where I have distanced myself from nearly everyone because I don't feel like anyone would want to hang around with me. Im convinced I can read peoples minds and their thoughts about me which are 99% negative. I think I can read body language like a NLP pro. I also know this is mainly in my head, but the niggling doubt I have about myself makes me steer clear of attempting to forge relationships. From bitter experience I can no longer face (perceived or real) rejection, so I choose loneliness. |
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#357
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ME TOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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#358
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I feel that way today, too. BPD I think is a coping strategy but uncovering
the causes is the challenge. The personality can cope with only so much....borderlines need to be more protective and draw boundaries, because they are loving and volatile....hang in there.... ![]()
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"Men’s vows are women’s traitors". Act 3, Scene 4 - "Cymbeline", by William Shakespeare Last edited by darkpurplesecrets; Mar 07, 2014 at 06:20 AM. Reason: administrative edit............ |
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#359
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Quote:
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"Men’s vows are women’s traitors". Act 3, Scene 4 - "Cymbeline", by William Shakespeare |
#360
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def relate..
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#361
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a very precise description of myself, sadly.. but some addition to my knowledge about bpd, so thanks... still trying to figure out what i should do now that i know about these odd personality i'm having hiks
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#362
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#363
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![]() ![]() and downs... nothinng real neutral. rage, etc....
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#364
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WOW!!!! I feel this really describes me and will help me when I see my new therapist thanks for the info....
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#365
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So,I have BPD too? Because the descriptions are so much like what I had been experience..
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#366
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Most of this sound familiar which is scary. Most of it came in the last 2 years since MS symptoms started.
SamanthaAnne ![]() ![]() |
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#367
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me to a t
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#368
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Me too!! to a tee.
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#369
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Such a relief to be with others like me.
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#370
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I feel like this describes me, with an exception to the "love" part. I remain wary of rejection, so I allow myself to "like" a person to a reasonable extent so I don't end up missing the relationship if/when it ends.
As far as intimate love (spouse, etc), I don't know if it really exists, or if it's just an idea that two people share... |
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#371
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So what happens when the chaos wins? When you are neutralized and can't move? Some days I feel as if I can't even breathe - I literally gasp for air. I perspire. Anything I do manage to accomplish is me, being a fraud, and getting whatever it is done as quickly as possible so that I can withdraw again. I rarely even leave my house. My husband tries to cover for me, but on the flip side, he's angry and some days I feel he deliberately does things to provoke me as payback for me not being fully functional. This is the worst feeling in the world. This being frozen, useless, worthless.
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#372
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I am in tears right now. To see what I feel, able to be expressed in words it is very scary. To see yourself this way, and worse yet to see yourself the way your loved ones see you everyday. It's so hard not to feel in the way, a burden, so broken....
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#373
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I love this description because it doesn't tell it like there is something necessarily wrong, it just is.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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--c.k. |
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#374
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This makes sense to me...which means it sounds familiar. I don't have the rage I used to have, but I'm left with the loneliness that comes with feeling unworthy somehow. Does feeling better about what I can contribute to a healthy personal relationship just come with time?
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#375
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I agree with what Vunderful wrote about intimate love....I think it is an idea.....for women, usually a dream fulfillment or just not to be alone. I wish I lived in a more laid back community where people actually smile in public; here it is all very harsh, most businesses are so greedy I have to fight every day not to get ripped off by some contractor or dentist...so, then my defense is to retreat, the bridge goes up and I lock myself in. It is frustrating for me, with certain borderline traits, because I think I'm highly sociable, but also guarded around people, so that I don't let my guard down and feel inhibited, except I'm very funny and can make people laugh. I also have dramatic highs, but have never done anything destructive. I think my sweet dog gets me, though, and I feel safe with her. Enough of this...it is way too late to be up and writing. The more I examine this, the stronger I feel about a change of locale for awhile.
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"Men’s vows are women’s traitors". Act 3, Scene 4 - "Cymbeline", by William Shakespeare |
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