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  #201  
Old Jan 25, 2013, 09:43 AM
Anonymous32935
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Work was called off several days this week due to it being slow which definitely hit the pocket book. Been fairly sucessful at working on other projects and staying busy, which always helps with the anxiety and all the other wonderful things you come to expect everyday.

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  #202  
Old Jan 25, 2013, 09:45 AM
Anonymous12111009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Maranara View Post
Valerian and Melatonin are two herbal suppliments when, taken before bed, can aid with sleeping. Celestial Seasonings has a Sleepytime tea with the Valerian. It won't affect your wakefulness or performance the next day and have found them useful. I'm used to a bit of insomnia, though, and usually don't take them unless I go more than two days or so with none. It's all a thinking thing. Just can't stop sometimes.
That's exactly it. Like the motor in my head has been turned on and glued in the "on" position.

I've taken melatonin and it does nothing for me. I don't know about the valerian. I need something powerful though because I keep going and going unless something knocks me out cold. I have an unopened bottle of Zzzquil but idk if that will work either. :/ Might try to get something like Ambien if the z stuff doesn't work.
  #203  
Old Jan 25, 2013, 09:45 AM
Anonymous327401
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Feeling like a total loser this afternoon.
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  #204  
Old Jan 25, 2013, 09:49 AM
Anonymous12111009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Buttercup.. View Post
Feeling like a total loser this afternoon.
Awww you're not a loser in my book. In fact I just looked you up in my book and you're on the "full of awesomeness" page (((buttercup)))
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  #205  
Old Jan 25, 2013, 10:00 AM
Anonymous32935
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Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006 View Post
That's exactly it. Like the motor in my head has been turned on and glued in the "on" position.

I've taken melatonin and it does nothing for me. I don't know about the valerian. I need something powerful though because I keep going and going unless something knocks me out cold. I have an unopened bottle of Zzzquil but idk if that will work either. :/ Might try to get something like Ambien if the z stuff doesn't work.
That tea is called Sleepytime Extra. Can be found in most stores. Worth trying.
  #206  
Old Jan 25, 2013, 11:02 AM
Anonymous12111009
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Watching it start to rain/snow/mix..... Already shivering just thinking about it. :S
  #207  
Old Jan 25, 2013, 02:26 PM
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BorderlineMess BorderlineMess is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2012
Location: South Carolina
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In 3 and 1/2 hours I will be home in my bed in my pjs with my doggie, watching Downton Abbey. Today, I am so proud of myself for:
1)Coming into work
2)Coming to work on time
3)Not asking to leave early (because I'm developing a cold)
4)Actually accomplishing work and not just playing around on the internet
5)Working even though my computer was down until 1pm
6)Taking my dad's dislike of my newly baked baguette in stride
7)Eating a healthy lunch

And to think I started this day in a bad mood...I hope my productive trend continues

Oh, and bonus points for not killing my car. Apparently I've been driving around with no oil in my engine. And, as we all know, that will kill an engine in seconds. So, how I accomplished that is beyond me. My mechanic was floored and said I was extremely lucky. I agreed wholeheartedly.
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  #208  
Old Jan 25, 2013, 07:22 PM
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BorderlineMess BorderlineMess is offline
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Boom! Made it through the end of the work day...enjoying some TV on my computer....petting my puppy. I am happy for this moment. I don't know what the next hour will bring, but I know, right now, that I am content.

I hope everyone is enjoying their day, evening, night, or whatever time is it for you. Thinking of y'all...
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Thanks for this!
Bill3
  #209  
Old Jan 26, 2013, 05:19 AM
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XAndromedaX XAndromedaX is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2013
Location: CANADA
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Blah. Had a rough day. My SO is having serious issues with ****. And me. And my ********. Now that he knows its ********. And hes pulling away..or I'm imagining it and pushing him away...which is like, the same thing to me...
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  #210  
Old Jan 26, 2013, 05:23 AM
Anonymous327401
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Feeling much better that last night
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  #211  
Old Jan 26, 2013, 12:45 PM
Anonymous200104
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I've had a bad week. Just...everything has gone wrong from the battery in my car dying to having a big fight with a close friend so now I'm not even sure where our friendship is at. I spent yesterday evening crying on and off and just feeling very sad.. I have a first date tonight and the bad thing about it is that I'm not even excited (I am very nervous though). I'm just trying to get up the emotional energy to be able to be happy and spirited so that he doesn't have a bad time. He's a great guy, and I should be excited, I am just in a very negative frame of mind right now and keep thinking, "What's the point? This is just another relationship I'm likely to ruin." But it's not his fault that I'm BPD (he doesn't know, obvs) and he should have a good time tonight so...I'm gonna rally and make sure that happens.
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  #212  
Old Jan 27, 2013, 12:56 AM
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BrokenNBeautiful BrokenNBeautiful is offline
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Location: I live with myself. Because that is all I can depend on. Everthing around me changes.
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I have a date now for Valentine's Day with Arvind, my new bf.

I guess I can't really avoid someone I care about.

My mentor is counseling me on love dependency.

I tried not to get too high on it. The date.

I have not had a V date since 1998 and that was a disaster.

Carol
__________________
The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!
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  #213  
Old Jan 28, 2013, 04:58 PM
Anonymous327401
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Crying and I don't even why.
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  #214  
Old Jan 28, 2013, 05:55 PM
Anonymous37866
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doing pretty good today actually, no heavy duty emotions.
Thanks for this!
Atypical_Disaster, BrokenNBeautiful
  #215  
Old Jan 28, 2013, 05:58 PM
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BorderlineMess BorderlineMess is offline
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Trying not to feel like a failure. I missed school today because I've had a cold/flu all weekend and the end of last week and I was just exhausted. I have no motivation to do anything good for myself. Feeling useless. But honestly, I'm enjoying the time to myself.
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Thanks for this!
Bill3, BrokenNBeautiful
  #216  
Old Jan 28, 2013, 10:20 PM
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BrokenNBeautiful BrokenNBeautiful is offline
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Location: I live with myself. Because that is all I can depend on. Everthing around me changes.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BorderlineMess View Post
Trying not to feel like a failure. I missed school today because I've had a cold/flu all weekend and the end of last week and I was just exhausted. I have no motivation to do anything good for myself. Feeling useless. But honestly, I'm enjoying the time to myself.
Get well soon.

I mean it. Flu s*cks.

Carol
__________________
The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!
Thanks for this!
BorderlineMess
  #217  
Old Jan 28, 2013, 10:21 PM
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BrokenNBeautiful BrokenNBeautiful is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2009
Location: I live with myself. Because that is all I can depend on. Everthing around me changes.
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I posted a new thread, "I did not run".

I am so sick of my bpd.

I feel insecure about my new relationship.

I want to run.

He's going to check on me. He won't let me run. I am freaking out.

Carol
__________________
The idea of a soul mate is an ILLUSION. In reality, we must learn to be our own best friend/partner. Then if love comes to us, we will already be whole. All that love can do, at that point, is enhance our wholeness!
Hugs from:
Atypical_Disaster, Bill3, BorderlineMess
  #218  
Old Jan 29, 2013, 09:42 AM
Anonymous32935
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Very tired; going on very little sleep and working all day. Talked to my daughter and started to break down after I got off the phone with her. Looks like it's going to be a roller coaster kind of day.
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  #219  
Old Jan 29, 2013, 10:47 AM
avlady avlady is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2013
Location: angola ny
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Buttercup.. View Post
I am so tired, I have been awake almost 48 hours and I am in need of sleep.
i hope you can get some sleep, i'm a nervous wreck now trying to get housework done but i can't get off this website it's fun!!!!!!!!!!!
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Atypical_Disaster
  #220  
Old Jan 29, 2013, 12:14 PM
Anonymous12111009
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Been kind of "meh" lately. About everything, especially people. I actually had stayed out of chat all Saturday night which is a rarity for me. i looked at all the people, and was like "eh, don't care..." Thought my creativity was slipping too until last night I did start another character for my project and am pretty happy with it. Everything else is just blah.
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Atypical_Disaster
  #221  
Old Jan 29, 2013, 01:22 PM
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BorderlineMess BorderlineMess is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2012
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 210
Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006 View Post
Been kind of "meh" lately. About everything, especially people. I actually had stayed out of chat all Saturday night which is a rarity for me. i looked at all the people, and was like "eh, don't care..." Thought my creativity was slipping too until last night I did start another character for my project and am pretty happy with it. Everything else is just blah.
Missed you (and everyone else) in our BPD chat on Sat night.


I'm still feeling sick so I'll be missing work and school again. Just feel so achy and tired. So out of it. I hope tomorrow will be better.
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Atypical_Disaster, Bill3, BrokenNBeautiful
  #222  
Old Jan 29, 2013, 02:14 PM
Anonymous12111009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BorderlineMess View Post
Missed you (and everyone else) in our BPD chat on Sat night.


I'm still feeling sick so I'll be missing work and school again. Just feel so achy and tired. So out of it. I hope tomorrow will be better.
Aww <3

I tried a bpd chat one night and didn't feel comfortable. this is the place (the forums) where I mostly talk bpd stuff but in chat I like to be more light and casual about stuff. I'll pop in and say hi next time though

*hugs*
~S4
  #223  
Old Jan 29, 2013, 05:25 PM
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Epiphany111 Epiphany111 is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2013
Location: South Lake Tahoe
Posts: 54
Currently im ok I guess, but I keep getting waves of terrible worry and sadness. I have terrible mommy issues and they are effecting me tenfold recently. My mother has cancer and has for almost ten years...it is when this cancer hit that she actually became a small part of my life. Now she refuses to talk to me because I did not give her a car I had...idk...she is crazy. But she is still dying, alone, refuses to answer my phone calls, but is suicidal. Im so ****ing worried for her...I don't have anyone to talk to about this, so I am here...with you guys...even though I don't know any of you...
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  #224  
Old Jan 29, 2013, 05:26 PM
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Epiphany111 Epiphany111 is offline
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  #225  
Old Jan 30, 2013, 02:16 PM
Anonymous327401
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Feeling much better than yesterday.
This has cheered me up

The BPD Daily Check in Thread
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Thanks for this!
Atypical_Disaster, BorderlineMess, Epiphany111
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