Very depressed over pain.

Thank you, Lee. I am only just seeing your post here today. I stayed off the computer since before you posted on November 3rd. Not using my PC did allow my neck to improve and reduce my need for Vicocin. It is very lonely, though. Yesterday, I came back to using my computer. It was nice to get your post above. I will try to be a better advocate for myself. I am in despair over my doctors way of responding to me. I got real depressed, so I came back to PC.

Rose -- please keep in contact with me because I've been thru what YOU are going thru right now. Maybe I can help get you through all this, and maybe together we can get you proper pain control.

These doctors LIKE to intimidate patients. They do this on purpose. Well, you know what? This might be gross, but they wipe their back end just like we do. They aren't special. They aren't royalty or anything. They are just common, ordinary people. Just because they have M.D. after their names doesn't mean anything. You have either MS. or Mrs. BEFORE your name!! So what's the difference, right?

So lets try to do this together. I think I might be able to help you get better pain control. So try to keep in touch, okay? God bless Rose. And take GOOD care of yourself. ((((Rose)))) Lee

I have to say this is one area I hit the jackpot when I was told by the new primary care doctor a couple years ago that they would not prescribe any pain meds. That was a time when I was trying to find a female doctor within decent driving distance on my duel eligible insurance. I was incensed at how I was being treated, by implication as if I was a drug addict because I had two visible areas w/ nerve damage and yet the doctors were acting as if I was seeking drugs. Like you I never had any issues w/ that and I made the pills last longer than they were prescribed for. The part I wasn't understanding was the part Leed talked about, I was SO worried about how the doctors might perceive me that I was not getting adequate pain relief. So the new doc really did me a favor by sending me to the pain specialist.

I was open w/ her about how I felt about being seen as an addict, she was open w/ me about how the rules have pushed them into a legal corner that forces every client to sign a contract in order to get pain treatment. I didn't have to pee every time I saw her but they do more than just test your drug levels, they are also watching your liver and many other functions to make sure the medications are not interacting. I was on both sleeping meds and pain meds during that time they monitored me more carefully. But because they specialize in pain management they could have me on both, but only as long as it was pain that was interfering with my sleep. When pain was no longer a problem but I still had sleeping problems she referred me to a sleep specialist. She was sorry but could not justify giving me the sleep meds any more.

Last time I saw my pain doctor I was worried because the hospital had changed all my meds around and had me on 2 -10/325 percocets every 4 hours and lowered the long acting meds. Thats a lot of Tylenol! She put me on a program to ween off and told me to stop worrying so much. But in a nice way. Despite the peeing and the contract we have a good relationship, shes one of my favorite doctors. I'm now in the process of weening off most of the meds since the surgery was a success. I'll still need to see her for my neck but like yours it doesn't require everyday meds. I kept detailed charts of my pain and the medicine when I started seeing her I don't know if that had anything to do with why she trusts me or if it's something beyond that. I too wish all my doctors would talk to each other. I have a master list of my doctors, the pharmacy(w/ addresses and phone numbers and all that jazz) I use and one of my all meds prescribed and OTC that I keep current and print out and take with me when I see anybody so they all have the same info.

But you and every person on this planet deserves pain relief that works and they deserve to get it without feeling like they have to beg for it or demean themselves in any way. Leed has some great pointers and experience.

I am very grateful for these knowledgeable replies. Even though I am a nurse and was very good at standing up for my patients, I am am putty in their hands, when it comes to me. Yes, Lee, I believe they are power-tripping at my expense. It has made me so angry. Yesterday, I went off like a nut at my psychiatrist. I asked him why I have to be the in between the two of them . . . and WHY couldn't they collaborate like consulting professionals. (They are part of the same system.) Then I felt so ashamed that I lost my dignity by going off like that.

My PCP told me that he frowns on me taking Ritalin that my pdoc prescribes. So I've done without it for weeks. I am very depressed for a number of reasons, but the stopping of Ritalin might be a factor. Yesterday, my pdoc says he sees no problem taking Ritalin in the morning and taking Vicodin now and then. That's when I snapped. Trying to mediate between these two doctors has me feeling like I am trying to mediate peace in the Middle East. They should be working as a team to help me. I will stay in touch. Thank you for wanting to help me. I have no family near me. I am never accompanied by anyone when I go to these bozos. I have no one to stand up on my behalf, or even be a witness to what goes on. This is a county health plan that I must use until I am eligible for Medicare in less than 2 years. Then I can go back to the doctors I used to have before I got on SSDI.

Sidestepper, I will have to re-read your post tomorrow. Thank you for helping me to not be afraid of being sent to a pain clinic. What you say about liver function monitoring makes a lot of sense. It is true that the more you document, the more respect you command. It is hard to be all that organized when you are depressed.

I really am only habituated to this sleeping pill because a resident insisted on me taking it. I do have a sleep disorder since age 3. But my antidepressant - amitriptyline - works quite well as a sleep inducer. I was fine on that for years, until providers started pushing benzos on me. I believe I can get off Temazepam, if I do it gradually. I am very sensitive to benzo withdrawal. The Ritalin was probably never a great idea. Again, a resident thought it would be the cat's meow. I think I may be in some withdrawal from that.

I've never smoked cigarettes and I don't even like coffee. So I don't have a past of being substance-habituated. I do like a beer with some meals, like a boiled dinner. It's kind of an ethnic thing.

I do understand that doctors are scared of someone like me taking a benzo and a hydrocodone and a beer before bedtime and not waking up the next morning. They have to protect themselves. That combo probably is not so dangerous as what they already had me on months ago when I did wake up with a heartbeat of over 140. I was taking a stiff dose of Temazepam AND Seroquel AND Tegretol AND Nortriptyline. I was walking into wall like a drunkard. I was falling asleep with food in my mouth. When I protested that I was overly medicated, they thought I was just being difficult. I am really disgusted, as I recollect what I've been through.

Both of these doctors were pushing Seroquel, like it was the Elixir of the Gods. Even 200 mg made me stuporous. But they said they wanted to get me up to 600 mg each night. I think they are more likely to harm me with drugs than I am to harm myself. I have an abnormally fast heart rate all my life. I am attuned to that and to anything that exacerbates that.

Well, enough thinking for tonight. I am worn out. I am glad I came back to PC. My self-esteem has taken a beaten with how these doctors treat me. Then I feel so guilty when I get irritable with them. I maybe need to forgive myself for that . . . maybe say I didn't get into that state of mind without some extended stress put on me unnecessarily.

(JD), Thanks for input. Has Obamacare been a factor in discouraging docs from writing pain scripts? How has that played out in Florida? I would be interested to learn more about what impacts what. May you get your "hope" back. Good luck with your new pain MD. Let us know how that works out.

Thanks all of you, very much.

Bless your heart Rose -- I'm GLAD you went off on your shrink! At least it shows you are beginning to stand up for yourself! That's good! Don't lose that.

Obamacare is NOT good for seniors. I haven't read the whole thing, but it is NOT for our benefit. And now Obama is going to CUT Social Security, which will also cut our Disability Checks!! It hasn't gotten thru the House yet, but he's trying! That dirty S.O.B. -- how does he expect us to live, while he gives the rich more tax breaks? Regardless of what he SAYS, the rich ALWAYS have tax breaks.

As far as pain management doctors, I can't go to any anymore. Once you've had everything done that they do, they wont keep you anymore. They DO NOT manage prescriptions indefinitely. They will "throw you out." They may write your scripts for awhile, but sooner or later, you'll be told to go elsewhere for your prescriptions because No pain doc will manage your scripts for an extended length of time. At least that's what I was told. So now my GP takes care of me. And he has done a BETTER job than the pain doc did! He knows ALL my prescriptions, so those don't get mixed up. Tests are run regularly, that are needed to be done. So I feel safer with my GP.

Maybe it would be a good idea for YOU to ask your GP to take over your care Rose. Would he be willing to? At least all your drugs would be in one place, and things wouldn't be scattered all over the place. You wouldn't be "double-drugged" like you seem to be. Seems like doctors are almost over-dosing you on some things. Not good!!! Just a suggestion.

Wishing you all the best my friend. Please keep me posted, will you? I worry about you!! Hugs, Lee

That is so interesting and important to know . . . that Pain Management Specialists aren't there for staying with you over the long haul. Thanks for that info. I learn so much here.

My GP has not earned my trust. He's not all that smart on Psych drugs. My pdoc is more sympathetic to letting me get both the sleep med and pain med. He thinks my GP is being unnecessarily inflexible. Also, he's willing to write my GP a consult letter encouraging him to have more patience about me getting off the sleeper.

So I need both of them. I hope I have not permanently alienated my pdoc. I thought of apologizing to him profusely. But, no, I'm not going to do that. I've groveled before everyone, and it gets me nowhere.

This is me too. I love hydrocodone for my pain and the high I get from it helps me function mentally much, much better.
My husband had an addiction to pain medications until not long ago and I can now say I truly understand how he could get addicted.

for you rose. Pain sucks

Flooded, thanks for this comment. Isn't it the truth. It sounds like your experience is similar to mine. When I was much younger, I imagined that I was "above" a lot of things. We really don't appreciate how others can get sucked into a bad situation, until we feel that pull on ourselves. Then there is a whole different light on things.

I hope your pain situation, mental and physical, improves in the new year. ((((HUGS))))

Ask to see a physical therapist. Maybe that person can help you build up some muscle support for the neck muscles. I was in a car accident and I'm herniated on the left side C1-C7 and severe pain L5 S1 in the lower back. Your life can change in an instant. the PT really helped my neck and my knee which I didn't even feel the need to mention here. Also maybe some books from the library. I know my uncle swears by someone named Pete Egoscue. That may or may not work for you.
Pixie

Thanks, Pixie12, I have been given a referral to be seen by PT (for the 4rth time, as the first 3 referrals weren't done right.) I'll keep it in mind that you found it so helpful, despite being so injured. I'm glad it did help you. I'm also hoping that a physical therapist can reassure me about what is safe for me to do. My condition seems to get worse every month, and that is making me so anxious. You've got me thinking I need to push harder on getting hooked up with PT.

The pt was really great with ideas for basic living. She was so helpful and small things do trigger big pain! For me putting on socks can be horrible,but there are helpful aids available and your pt can recommend things and teach you how to use them. It isn't all exercise, but personally I found the neck traction to be the best part of going!
Pixie


QUOTE=Rose76;2813943]Thanks, Pixie12, I have been given a referral to be seen by PT (for the 4rth time, as the first 3 referrals weren't done right.) I'll keep it in mind that you found it so helpful, despite being so injured. I'm glad it did help you. I'm also hoping that a physical therapist can reassure me about what is safe for me to do. My condition seems to get worse every month, and that is making me so anxious. You've got me thinking I need to push harder on getting hooked up with PT.[/QUOTE]

Thanks again, Pixie, I do my own traction thing. I lie crossways on the bed facing the ceiling. I have my head hanging over the side of the bed with a little down pillow providing some support. There is just enough traction to feel good on my spine from base of skull to middle of shoulder blades. Still, I bet real traction is more effective.

This thread is kind of old. I am grateful for the many replies.

I am very seriously depressed. I am afraid to tell either my regular doctor, or my psychiatrist. They are both part of the same healthcare network. So they see each others' electronic notes.

I am afraid that, if my regular doctor feels that I am very depressed, he will never let me have access to the pain medication that I feel I need. I have been holding on to some Vicodin for emergencies. I have taken one around once a week. I am down to about 6 tablets left. (10mg/325mg) I live in fear of not being able to manage my pain.

Tomorrow, I see a nurse practitioner to learn the results of the recent MRI of my neck. I will ask for referral to a neurosurgeon, which she already offered to give me. Maybe the neurosurgeon will be someone who will appreciate how bad my neck feels. I have been controlling pain by avoiding activity that sets it off. That is just about anything.

Sometimes I think my worsening depression is largely to due to my neck pain. Sometimes I think my neck pain is made to seem worse by my depression. It is becoming a vicious circle. It's been that for months, now.

I am going downhill from this combination of serious depression and physical pain and terrible anxiety over what could go wrong with me, physically, in the future. Both my father and my boyfriend became partially paralyzed due to degenerative neck problems. I have no children. There is no one who would help care for me, if I became disabled. I contemplate awful things every day. I have suicidal ideation running around in the back of my brain on a continuous basis. I don't even think that I will ever be able to stop that.

It's terrible to put this stuff here. I am sorry. I don't know what else to do, or where else to go. I could never tell any family about this. We are not close. My boyfriend is elderly and can barely walk. I can't burden him more than I already have.

The psych rehab program that I begged to get into is not helping me. I hate going there. My understanding is that it is for educational purposes and not a place to seek therapy. I would be very afraid to disclose my level of distress to anyone there. I thought the program would be different.

I went into the psych hospital back a year ago. It was a terrible place and I would never go back in there.

Months ago I was having all kinds of psych meds pushed on me. I truly was over-medicated and woke up one morning with a heartrate of 140/minute. (I was being told to take Nortriptyline, Temazepam, Seroquel, Tegretol, Neurontin, and Ritalin all at the same time.)

Now I take much less. Yet, now, my doctor is telling me that I can't get anymore Vicodin because of the remaining (much fewer) psych meds that I take. My pdoc thinks the regular MD is being overly harsh in withholding the pain meds.

Ironically, I would never try and overdose with drugs. I would regard the outcome as far too unpredictable. I have never made a suicide attempt and have no interest in "gesturing." For a good many years I've had access to plenty of meds that I could have used for that purpose, if that was something I wanted to do.

I guess there is just nothing I can do. I guess I just can't tell anyone how bad I feel. There is a crisis line in my community that is very good. I have called them and been able to tell them everything about how bad I feel. I suppose that is the best I can do.

Being on the computer today has caused my upper back and neck to get very sore. So I've taken Vicodin for that, a little while ago. It will calm me down mentally, as well. 3 hours after I take Vicodin, I start to feel better mentally. I am becoming desperate to escape constant depression/anxiety. As I write this, I think that part of why I am desperate to have Vicodin available is because I know it can help me psychologically. This is starting to sound confused.

All my life I've had recurrent depressive episodes. I've always been able to recover from them to what I would call my normal baseline. For months, now, I've not been able to recover to that. When I get extremely despondent, I go stay at my boyfriend's apartment. That seems to always help. But I am very inactive and becoming in worse and worse physical shape. My boyfriend is needing more and more help with his household chores and I feel I am not meeting his needs as I should. The only other person I have any on-going contact with is my brother who shows up sporadically. He is mentally ill and I try to be supportive of him. That is difficult because he is so disturbed and becomes suddenly hostile at times. I've tried telling him that I am depressed and he just goes on to criticize me. He seems incapable of empathy. At times, I've wondered if he is a sociopath. He gets arrested frequently for threatening behavior.

The remainder of my relatives live very far away. I used to travel to where I grew up about every 18 months. I've not been there for a visit in over 2 years and I feel like I would not be much wanted, if I did go for a visit.

I feel extremely sad a lot of the time. The worst thing is the fear of becoming disabled eventually. Mental health services/resources in my community have become less and less over the past 10 years. I was seriously depressed in 2003/2004. There was much more support available then. I recovered to my normal baseline and was productively employed until 2010. I do not believe I will recover this time.

The pain pill kicked in and I feel much better. I believe that for the rest of my life, I will only feel somewhat okay while I have hydrocodone in my bloodstream. I have not been popping these pills willy-nilly. I should be able to discuss all this with a doctor. I don't believe that I ever will. I live in the American West. The options for self-harm are so much wider here than in the NorthEast where I grew up. That doesn't seem to motivate any heightened psych outreach.

I used to drink when I felt really distressed and it greatly relieved my mind. I could escape anxiety or agitated depression in that way. Over the past 5 years, I've lost that tendency. I just don't tolerate alcohol like I used to and feel a physical aversion toward more that a modest intake. Instead of that being good, it has been kind of bad. I feel like I have no escape. Agitated depression feels very destabilizing for me now. I am wanting some kind of help, but I don't think that what I want even exists. Since not being employed and now getting SSDI, I am alone way too much and am spiraling downward. I really don't want to live, but I don't believe that I am an imminent danger to myself. If I ever become that, it will be too late for help. I am sorry to put all this here. I need what people get from being members of loving families. I am not. There is no one to care what becomes of me. Professionals will care about not incurring any liability. So my doctor won't prescribe Vicodin. He will leave me in pain. That doesn't make self-harm less likely for me. But that won't matter to him. Only liability matters to my doctors. I blew up at my pdoc and that has me feeling very disturbed. I feel so sorry that it happened. I don't feel that it helped him understand how bad I feel. I probably am seriously bipolar. No amount of treatment or therapy will change that. I feel euphoric now from the Vicodin. I will go try to enjoy it . . . maybe something good is on TV. I am sorry for all this outpouring. It feels like PC is all I really have to turn to. This is the only safe place. I hate to leave here. Time to leave the desk. I will be okay tonight.

You don't sound confused. You sound very much like someone who is in pain both physically and mentally.

I wish I could tell you how to make it better but I don't know how. I do understand though. You are describing exactly were I was before my surgery. Things haven't been great since then but the pain has been so much better. I don't have any pain from the L5-S1 nerve any more. The shots I got in my neck helped that for a very long time now that I'm going off the meds I can feel the pain in my neck again so it's time for another injection(only let them do a deep injection with fluoroscope or MRI's so they can see that they will not hit anything else in your neck!), but the lidoderm patches work really well on my neck, you might ask about those if you doc is so worried about pills.

It did take a long time to get diagnosed, go though all the steps, surgery was suggested right away but I insisted on trying all nonsurgical methods first. Ironically when I was ready for surgery my MRI said I was fine, my pain doc said no way, sent me to a different radiologist. MRI's are done differently by different people. The one that said I had no problems was done widely spaced and missed both cysts and the nerve damage. The surgeon also took an old fashion X-ray and that showed the damage much more clearly from the side.
So you may have to be aggressive about getting your pain needs met.

It is possible to get relief. I know it is really hard when the depression hits and they do feed each other. I worried most about becoming addicted something my pain doctor said to let her worry about. I did get tolerance but I'm not having a problem going off. I think people feel better after talking pain meds because their body is feeling better. As a nurse you know there's chemical changes when you are in pain, when you no longer fighting that pain battle the chemicals change again. I have had to make changes but I'm no longer in the pain I was in, I believe the same is possible for you.

sidestepper, Thank you for your understanding reply. Also, thank you very, very much for explaining some things to me. I got the result of the MRI. It seemed to minimize my problem. It said, "Mild degenerative changes at C5-6 and C6-7 without significant narrowing of the spianl canal." Also, it said, "Neural Foraminal narrowing is worst on the left at C5-6." That last bit corresponds with my left hand going numb for 2 months this past Spring. So I'm glad to see some correlation between what the test showed and my experience. I still have numbness in the 2 smallest fingers of my left hand.

But the constand "pulling" sensation is very fatigueing. It's like I've got a big heavy horseshoe hanging around my neck all day.

Also, if I look at myself in a mirror sideways (holding a second mirror) the shape of my neck in profile is considerably changed from a few years ago. I mean - it's like the mirror shows more about the abnormality than the MRI. The x-rays also seemed to show a little more cause for concern. They were done with me lying on my back.

Have you ever had imaging of your spine done while your stood up? I feel like this would show more of the problem.

It means a lot to me that you say that not every MRI is done the same. I'm very grateful that you've told me that you had an MRI that missed important pathology. I will not let any doctor make me think I'm just being neurotic by complaining that something is bothering me a lot. I can't thank you enough for that.

Thanks for explaining about the shots. I have been given a referral to a neurosurgeon to talk about steroid shots. (That's what the nurse practitioner said could possibly be done for me.) I always thought I would never even consider steroid shots. I'll see what they tell me. Thanks for the info about shots and patches.

I'm so glad you've had a reduction of pain from your surgery. It's always a risk to go through that. I do understand that your situation was far more advanced than mine. You've had so much guts about everything. I hope you get more improvement as you heal. Keep me posted.

The x-rays were done as I stood sideways to the machine. One w/ my arms raised and one w/ my arms out in front of me as I bent forward. These were the x-rays that showed how off set my spine was. I've never had an MRI standing.

I'm glad to hear you will be seeing a specialist for this don't be afraid to let them know how much pain you are in. They are in a better position to help with that.

I really appreciate the specifics on diagnostic X-rays. I am going to ask for a sideways x-ray with me standing. Then I want to see it myself. If I lean the least bit forward, my head become so heavy. Chiropractors call my profile "forward head posture." It involves "loss of the normal lordotic curve in the neck" which, in my case, is replaced with some "kyphosis" - humped spine (at cervical-thoracic junction.) I'm not a big believer in chiropractic medicine, but their web sites describe what I feel so well. Plus they show samples of x-rays that look like how I know my neck is. I've been warned by not to get my neck manipulated.

I'm also going to see an orthopedic specialist for a foot problem. I'm going to ask for feedback on my spine as well.

Good luck. Let us know what happens with that.

My pdoc has always been very supportive with my pain treatment. Try not to let "people" try to villify you as you have a qualifying medical condition. I have felt this way over the years. The medicines themselves have been villified.

The people that make sure things don't have interactions are my pharmacists. I use one place for everything. Even some of them have raised eyebrows at my pain meds scripts, & know what I have to say to that? CALL my doc, call ALL my docs for that matter .... sheesh.

Still there is a new pain management doc - I will no longer work with him - he commits fraud. It is fraudulent practice for a doctor to threaten to lower your pain meds dosage to less than a therapeutic level in order to force you to take their shots.

It was my pdoc said I had the complete right to compassionate treatment with meds alone - this pain doc is really a surgeon, and of course he wants to practice surgical procedures. I don't think he cares about a person's pain at all, he just wants to make money from shots. Very expensive shots.

Luckily there is another doc in the practice who treats with either or, or a combo. I was doing great with him. Then he went on vacation, the other doc screwed up my trip to help my dad, and my holidays, up to today, b/c I haven't been able to function physically like I need to, and mentally? Depression YES. Bad enough to sometimes feel trapped with an emotional condition or conditions AND have your joints failing you at the same time, causing horrible debilitating pain.

Today I was lying down in my bed, b/c I was hurting so bad, and I decided I wanted out of this broken body today. I relaxed as much as I could, which I have learned over the years. Finally I had some success & I'll live another day ... I just wanted to say I understand the frustration of having two kinds of major medical problems, and now we have two different kinds of stigma to deal with.

Sad, but we can know in our hearts what our intentions are and feel good.

hermeand, I am so grateful for the feedback I am getting here.

Where I get my primary care put in a referral to a neurosurgeon. They're all part of the same university hospital system. Well - and this you'll appreciate - I get a phone call from a medical assistant at the Neuro's office. She say, "So would you be willing to have your problem treated surgically?" I'm thinking: What the heck kind of question is that to ask me before I even get evaluated by the neurosurgeon? But, as I'm getting a little foxier - maybe - I just say "Yeah." I don't see my condition, as it currently is, warranting any surgery . . . but I want to be seen by the neurosurgeon and learn what I can . . . and be told what options there are . . . so I figure just say "yes" to whatever (It's not like I signed consent for surgery.) to get in the door of this doc's office and then see what he has to say.

Honestly, it struck me as some kind of game playing. Combining that with what I'm seeing in your post, I'm starting to come up with a sense of how these "characters" wheel and deal with you. Thanks for the heads up. Where I go, I'm covered for most everything. They happen to be a teaching hospital/healthcare system, and I think they tend to look for people to practice stuff on. So I'll keep my "don't get hustled into anything" radar up.

What you say about the ethics of pain management is something I'll keep mindful of, also.

Thank you for being good enough to share the fruit of your experience, while you are in the midst of struggling with these problems. I hope you can get what's appropriate to manage in the best way for you. Knowledge is power. You've learned a lot. Isn't it a shame that we have to be so on the defensive?

I'll post here how I make out, as things unfold, as I keep these appointment. I so appreciate this feedback. Even though I worked as a nurse for many years (geriatrics/nursing homes,) I'm so naiive in many ways. I'ld be lost without PC.

Thanks again. (((HUGS))) May you feel better. I'm interested to know how you are doing.

Tomorrow I go to the neurosurgeon. I'm getting anxious. Mainly, I just hope he'll explain more to me. Mainly, I want to be more educated about what could happen with this condition . . . what activity is dangerous . . . what is not.

Also, I'm getting concerned that telling him that I have a lot of anxiety about my spine might result in him labeling me as neurotic and taking me less seriously.

Plus, I'm concerned about getting labeled as med-seeking. Nobody has suggested that. I've had my trust eroded over the past two years . . . since I went seeking psych treatment. I think doctors treat me different because I have a psych diagnosis.

Where I get my care uses electronic charting. The problem is that the docs have a hard time finding things like radiology reports. I'll bet the neurosurgeon won't even be able to bring up all the spinal imaging that has been done. I think I have a hard copy of the MRI report in my bag.

Mainly, I'm torn about how to report my symptoms. A lot of the time, I have twinges and pulling sensations that I would not strictly call pain. But if I say that, then my problem might get discounted. Also, I think this numbness in my left hand is significant, despite my PCP seeming very uninterested in it. I hope the neurologist, at least, shows some interest.

This morning I took a Vicodin. I was amazed at how much more comfortable I felt for many hours afterwards. I avoid all kinds of household chores that set off pain in my neck. I would like some doctor to seem to understand what this is doing to my quality of life.

Hi Rose76, A few words of advice which may or may not help you with your appt.

1) MRIs are amazing and can help you find out what is going on. They also can show you a lot of stuff that is going on that has nothing to do with your symptoms. A great question to ask the doctor when he tells you what is on the MRI is " Do any of these things correlate with my symptoms?" Don't be afraid of a No answer that can be just as helpful

2) About med seeking don't bring it up. I have seen people that weren't seeking meds come off like they were because they tried too hard to emphasize that they weren't. The Dr. will probably bring up medications and when they do just answer them honestly and you should be fine.

3) I wouldn't worry too much about being labeled neurotic because of you have anxiety about your spine. It is normal to have anxiety about something that has affected your life to the extent that your condition has. In fact anxiety is actually part of your condition so don't be concerned if your Dr picks up on it,it's probably a good thing.

4) Pain comes in many forms and is difficult to describe, It is truly a subjective sign. This means there is no test that will show what you feel. You are the expert on what you are feeling so explain what you are feeling the best that you can the Dr. will need to listen to what you are saying

5) WRITE DOWN YOUR QUESTIONS for the doctor before you see him and bring it with you. Make sure they address what you need to know . Prioritizing the questions on the list may not be a bad Idea.

6) If the appointment doesn't go the way you'd like It's ok to feel a little disappointed but don't get too frustrated you have gained more insight into your condition and there is still more work you can do to improve your condition.

-Chrain

hope everything turns out ok. i wouldn't worry about a label these days there are so many people on meds today, it's not the same as it used to be. i wish you luck!!

Goodluck, I hope you get a listening surgeon.

Chrain, Thanks for the pointers. I'm kind of nervous and you've helped me feel more organized.

avlady and sidestepper, Thanks for the encouragement.