Feeling like I have nothing left

I've just been feeling so down this past month. I don't know what exactly I feel anymore or why I feel this way, I just know that sometimes it can be unbearable. Every day I wake up and just try to get through the day. I do absolutely nothing but lay in bed all day. I barely eat, I don't have anywhere to go or anyone to talk to. I don't really want to go anywhere anyway. I've lost just about everyone in my life. I don't have any family or friends. I have two people I'm very close to and talking to them makes me feel so much better, but I can't always expect to do that can I?

I tell myself I'm just being silly and I shouldn't have anything to worry about but it doesn't work. I tried writing, listening to music, playing games and watching TV to pass the time. I went on Crisis Chat and spoke to someone. Nothing helps. I wish it was as simple as just going out and making new friends but it's not. I don't think anyone understands.

I don't know if it's just in my imagination but I feel like I have nothing to look forward to anymore. I used to look forward to talking to my friend but like I said above, I can't think that it'll always happen. Sometimes I really just want to sleep the entire day away. I'm really starting to hate myself and I hate that I have these thoughts. Nothing I do or tell myself is making it go away.

I feel the exact same way you do every day i never have anyone to talk to and often when i do try to sleep away the day i just lay there and think of all the wrong i've done ... Hopefully we can both get through this... do you recommend for others to go on the crisis chat i have been thinking about going on there..

"Nothing I do or tell myself is making it go away." You have my empathy and understanding as I am experiencing similar feelings. Unfortunately I am in charge of a charity fundraising event on Sunday and can't get my brain to focus on preparing for it. Acting as if I am capable just isn't working like I hoped. Sure hope you can give yourself a big hug and be gentle with yourself.

I hate when that dark cloud comes down on me. I used to get it really bad in the winter when i would get snowed in. I totally understand been there done that! only thing that helped me was anti-depression meds and forcing myself up and getting dressed and just acting like I had something to do sometimes I would just go to the store and look around didn't really have any money to buy anything but it got me up and out any ways! Sometimes I would not go any where at all just made me feel better getting up. I how this passes for you soon take care.

Hi ivalice; are you sure you do not have a health problem such as low blood sugar?
You mentioned hardly eating, and low blood sugar can really make someone feel bad

Oh how I can relate to your feelings. I, too do not want to get out of bed and feel the same way. I lost my job in 2008 and have not been able to find steady work in my field since the recession hit. I had gone through a long two year period where I did nothing but sleep in most of the day, feeling like I had nothing left in my life, my whole career that I worked for for ten years was gone. I feel at times that I will never return to it, so I have picked myself up and have returned to college to obtain a Masters Degree in a totally different field. I still have my days where I do not want to do anything and I cry so much. My advice for us, we need to look forward in our life and be blessed we are still alive. I too have two people I communicate with. I sometimes see my family, but they never call me, I call them and to make matters worse, we live in the same city about ten minutes away...I only have one sister and my parents are still alive, but they are old.
I hope we can be strong and get through this time we are going through. Stay positive. That is what I try to do.

Hey,

I was at this point a few years ago, although not to this extreme extent, but I found the best thing to do was to get support from those who care. You say you have a couple of friends that you talk to, and when you do, you feel better. So why stop? I know I talked to a couple of close friends along with a trusted adult, and I always felt relieved afterwards. It may seem like you are a waste of their time, but if they are true friends, they should be more than happy to help. If you want to make sure they aren't busy, I would say something along the lines of, "May I speak with you when you have some free time?" Or any variation that sounds like something you might say.

If these feelings continue though, you may want to see a doctor if it is possible. If not, maybe a counselor would help? I'm not sure of your age, but school counselors generally do a great job; mine did.

I hope you start feeling better soon and find a way to cope with these feelings in a healthy way. My PM box is always open.

JustDontAsk

Thank you all for the comments and hugs.

I did have a much better day today and I got to talk to my friend but I'm afraid I'll probably have one of those days again soon. I wish tomorrow and all the days after that will be like today. I don't know if things will ever change. It's been so up and down, I have a good day and then I have a really miserable one where I'm back to just laying in bed. In any case I do hope that things will get better for all of us.

pinkcutie143, it did take me a couple of tries to get someone to talk to. It did help me get through maybe an hour of the day but it didn't really do much else. I guess it is worth a shot. You don't really have anything to lose.

Callmebj, I don't have any health problems that I know of. I do get shaky sometimes if I don't eat for a long period of time. It happens once in a while, I've been told it could be hypoglycemia but I never got it checked out or anything. It hasn't happened recently.

The up and downs happened with me too, I just kept pushing through with the help of my friends and coach. I still have up and down days, but there are so many more ups now than there used to be. Keep pushing forward, I know you CAN and WILL get there. Don't lose hope! (:

Best Wishes and Take Care,

JustDontAsk

JustDontAsk, I forgot to mention that I do talk to my friends. The thing is I feel like I can't expect to talk to them everyday. If it were up to me I would. I don't know if that's because of my fear of possibly bothering someone or being annoying (and that's another story) or my past experiences or what, but I feel like that would be an unreasonable thing to ask, or something people wouldn't want to do.

I'm currently in college and it's my final semester. I don't really know much about school counselors in my school. I thought about seeing a doctor but I'm not sure if it'll help. I feel like nothing is helping me at this point.

I had another one of those days today. I just hope tomorrow is at least a little better. I'm not looking forward to it though.

If nothing has helped so far, maybe try something new? I don't mean to push you into something, I just want to give some suggestions and options to you.

And I feel the same way, I can totally relate. I've been thinking about texting my coach or one of my friends recently (and for the past few weeks), but I don't want to waste their time or be a bother...

I really hope your days goes better tomorrow. It's a new start, too; I wish you well.

JustDontAsk

It has been the same way for me for almost two years; getting worse all the time. I hate this and feel like a failure. My husband has been layed off for two years and I have slowly shut everyone out of my life because it takes too much energy. This isn't living. I can't even make it to see my T most of the time cause I hate to leave the house. I hope it can change for all of us.

JustDontAsk, I really do appreciate your suggestions and seeing a doctor is something I have been considering. I guess my only problem is I'm afraid it might not help and it'll just be a waste. If I could talk to my friend each day that would be great. I feel like the only other thing that could help is if there's a positive change in my life, which I don't think will happen any time soon. Everything else seems to just be a temporary fix, if anything.

Calista+12, I agree, this really isn't living. On days like this I feel like I'm just surviving and watching myself fall apart. I do what I can to get through the day, eat maybe 1 or 2 meals, sleep and then do it all over again the next day. I recently found myself waking up several times during the night. I can't seem to sleep straight through anymore.

Edit: I did contact my friend and asked something but she ignored me because she was "busy" and then just forgot about me. Maybe I'm overreacting but that felt like I wasn't even worth 2 minutes. That's really all I need right now...

You're most definitely worth a whole lot more than two minutes. Please don't doubt that for a minute. Sometimes my friends say they will text me or call me later, and then it never happens. It is disappointing, I agree, but I know I have to understand they sometimes cannot stop what they are doing for me. They change their lives enough for me as it is. So I decide I should be grateful for that instead.

And you're not overreacting. It's how you feel, and that automatically makes it important. Your emotions are important. And it is okay to feel that way. I know I felt the same way. But I eventually talked to this friend again for hours and that reminded me how much they care.

Now for the whole "I feel like the only other thing that could help is if there's a positive change in my life, which I don't think will happen any time soon" situation. Guess what? You have already done something positive for yourself! You are asking for help on here, and sometimes, it can be difficult to reach out. And I'm glad you are, because it shows your strength. And the effort you are giving to understand. And the desire to get better.

I personally would go see a doctor, just to give it a try...I could if I would. If it doesn't work, it's not likely that you will be worse off...Still just a suggestion! Ultimately up to you! (:

Best luck,

JustDontAsk

Final semester,that sounds familiar. I just went through this in college and I had no one. Graduation was the worst experience of my life. I went to my doctor and I recommend it. I actually was suffering from many factors not just one.. so definitely checkup with your doctor.

My primary doctor was the one who started the testing and explored my symptoms. It sounds like you've hit rock bottom. If it means anything, medications have saved my life. Yes there are set backs, but when you have no other options in life sometimes you have to make a commitment to your betterment or you become a ghost to yourself. I was once invisible to myself and still runaway from my problems even neglect myself. But, I am learning to love who I am.

I believe in you Ivalice82. You have my empathy.

I do think it's many factors for myself too. I think everything has just added up. I could have a good day and feel fine but other times I feel unimportant or like I really don't have anything left anymore. It's like a part of my mind won't let me feel better.

Anyway thank you both for the encouragement. I think I will consider seeing a doctor. That's probably the only other thing I haven't tried.

I have been that way sometimes too, like today was not a very good day for me...but who knows what tomorrow will bring.

I hope everything works out for you.

ivalice please see a doctor; it may help. It could be something as simple as your thyroid. You are worth much more than 2 minutes. (Listen to me...I can't take my own suggestions ) I hope you begin to feel better. I'm here if you need to talk.

Hi invalice82,

I have had days when I stayed in bed, even though I couldn't sleep. I am glad those days are in the past. Opening myself up to sharing my true thoughts and feelings in therapy helped. Meds help. A healthy diet helps, sometimes I'll eat something healthy, like vegetable juice, just to help stop negative thoughts or bad moods from getting worse. Quiting smoking helped. Quiting alcahol and drugs helped, eventually. I have a routine these days, which helps. It is reassuring to me to be able to predict what my day will consist of, routines help me with that. I enjoy long walks. I read the local newspaper. I post on facebook and here. I attend christian services on sunday, though I am hesitant about some of it. They are friendly, that is enough for me to return to. I do remember living the way you wrote. I didn't enjoy it either. Mental illness is an illness. Don't allow yourself to make it a moral failing, like laziness. I don't think that would solve your problem, I think it would cause you to feel worse. I think friends are beyond my control, though I've tried to control them in the past. They are there, or they are not. I have to survive and cope well, either way. I am kind, basicly, to people. I try to listen and offer sound advice, if I can to friends. I don't muzzle myself or expect a anyone else to muzzle their own thoughts or voice, lest they become abusive. It gets better with time. I accepted help from others, I think that helped also. Good luck!