[BatsAndButterflies]

Having a bad day today... My mother has been yelling at me all day long. I try to be so understanding and listen to her, but she says not one understands and we don't appreciate anything she does. She told me that she wasn't going to buy me meds anymore or take me to my therapy appointment and if I needed anything I could ask dad... blah

[Rose76]

I feel better today compared with yesterday. I had run out of my temazepam, which I take every night. Well I learned something real important. Running out of temazepam causes muscle spasms in my neck. I got the med, and the horrible neck pain is gone. What a huge relief.

[pandarama123456789]

Originally Posted by konrei

Trying my best to socialize with people online by role-playing. So far over the last week I'm getting the hang of it...

I used to do that! I got really into it and it became my only form of socialization. I don't remember why I stopped, I really liked it.

[regretful]

Slightly less miserable...

[BatsAndButterflies]

Ok so far... Hoping it stays that way.

[konrei]

Somewhat alright...

@pandarama
It's more of my 'stepping stone' to a good start in socializing because sometimes I feel like an idiot when I try to talk in public. :x

[Trying Hard]

Originally Posted by dg1983

Feeling a little numb right now. The weekend is coming up and I'm not looking forward to it because I know I will be feeling awkward at a family get together on Sunday, where people asking me about my future and the job that I hate. It's embarrassing.

I've been feeling the same way, too. It's kinda sad that I have to take xanax to even go to family get togethers that I used to really like. Then I have people continually asking me why I'm so quiet which puts me on the spot and makes it worse.

[Trying Hard]

Had a good weekend for the most part. It's my workplace and all the backstabbers there that really get my depression and anxiety going. Already dreading tomorrow.

[Rose76]

Wish I could die.

[misscath007]

Mood has been pretty low over the past week. Worried over my health and finances non stop. Feel like it's never going to end. Now what?

[Hellion]

I kind of want to kill my emotions I am thinking that would feel better than how I feel now.

[TerryL]

Originally Posted by Rose76

Wish I could die.

What happened? (you don't have to answer if you don't want to)

[MotherMarcus]

Had a good weekend. Saw the movie BRAVE on Saturday and spent some time at the beach yesterday.

[misscath007]

Hugs to all who need them.

I am slightly better mood wise. Back pain is still about the same. Still waiting on my primary doc's sending in the insurance authorization to see a doctor for a second opinion on surgery. She was out of the office all of last week . Seems like all I do is wait....

[regretful]

Still about the same...slightly less miserable than I was on Saturday...so that means I'm about the same as I was yesterday...day 3 with Cymbalta. Hoping that this medication works as advertised...

Things have just been hectic lately. Everything around me seems to just be falling apart. I no longer have a counselor or a psychiatrist, and I've even tried to get new ones and for some reason my doctor never fills out the referral form right and when I just go in asking for a new one because mine moved hospitals they tell me they won't just give me new ones even though I have a file stating I need them, and got abandon by other one.
To top that off I don't even have any friends to even talk to right now, they're all going through so much that I don't feel it right to talk to them about myself. They all keep coming to me with their problems and a few of them have been admitted recently. It leaves me with no one to talk to, and I can't even talk to my partner because she's struggling like crazy too with her eating disorder, and has a bunch of her family bombarding her about it and threatening to take her in to the hospital without even talking to her about it first.
Even if I did have someone to talk to I don't even think I'd be able to talk about myself and how I'm feeling because I'm to focused on everyone else just to keep me distracted from myself. I don't even know what's going on with me because I've lost myself in everyone else.
I just don't know any more.. I don't know how to deal with it all I can't even keep my thought pattern straight, my thought pattern is so scrambled that I can walk into the bathroom and forget what I'm in there for, I just can't keep my thoughts straight.
This is long enough though and probably doesn't make much sense. Thanks for letting me get some of this out..

[feary]

I just need to lose weight and be myself again...

[Rose76]

I have been in a lot of pain, mostly with my neck. I am depressed and anxious. I call my sister, but she doesn't answer or return call. My S/O is away for weeks visiting his family. I am here alone. No one wants me to come visit. I will be alone for the rest of my life.

[konrei]

Originally Posted by Rose76

I have been in a lot of pain, mostly with my neck. I am depressed and anxious. I call my sister, but she doesn't answer or return call. My S/O is away for weeks visiting his family. I am here alone. No one wants me to come visit. I will be alone for the rest of my life.

Don't say that, here at PC cares for you.

On topic, swingy mood and I blame the heat...

[Puffyprue]

Miserable..my life is in very dark place right now and everything are wrong, iam about to lose my bestfriend well he better off without me anyway and my body getting slower than usual , feel off twice today and have a lots of awful bruises on my legs and my constant headache seems wont go away , tired of crying today.

[regretful]

Day four of Cymbalta...I think...anyway, feeling a bit "medicated" for lack of a better term, and still miserable. Wish I had an appetite and still wish even more that I had something to look forward to other than more depression...

[pandarama123456789]

I actually had a good day yesterday. I saw a friend, talked to people I didn't know, didn't freak out in a group; all very big steps for me. But for some reason it doesn't seem to matter. I still feel bad about seeing people, I still just want to be alone. It doesn't make sense! Everyone was nice to me, and I think i talked more than I usually do, but it still doesn't matter because of this voice in the back of my head that keeps saying 'They were lying, They were pretending' and instead of ignore it I listen to it because what if it's right?? I should be happy right now because everything went swimmingly yesterday, no panic attacks, I didn't leave in the middle of the day, I wasn't ignored, I actaully felt some level of acceptance, but noooo. I apparently don't have the capacity for happiness...

[misscath007]

Still not feeling well. I go for my appt with the ortho surgeon to get a second opinion on the back surgery. My primary doc will not prescribe anything stronger than tramadol for my pain so that's that. Health care profs basically do not give a shytt.

[SeekingZen]

Today has not been a good day. I had every intention of being productive and positive today, however I am having SEVERE TMD pain today so that plan went out the window. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

[bumpy_road]

I feel horrible, hated, and alone.