Why can't I be happy?

I can't even be "happy", i do not know the last time I was feeling happy. For a few hours I will feel not depressed, may a few days(but that is rare).
It sucks, I think one of teachers notived, because I heard them talking to a co-teacher that I looked sad. I actualy wouldn't mind telling him,but I wish someone would ask how I feel, then depending on the persom, i would tell them.

Im sorry you are having a difficult time. Depression is a burglar of happiness and joy.

If you have someone you feel safe talking to, I'd encourage it. Family friends teachers - they may be able to point you in a good direction. Maybe even your own doctor or a school counselor?

I read something the other day I liked... Instead of thinking in terms of the day- try to think in terms of minutes or hours.. If you felt happy for an hour today think of that as a success over your depressed feelings.

Some people - especially those close to us may not realize an immediate change and are therefore not inclined to ask how we feel. Sometimes it's important to find someone who you are completely comfortable with and start the conversation yourself. And believe me - I know it's easier said than done.

I hope you can find someone to talk with, and a little feeling of happiness during the day.



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I've felt this way lots of times too. it's just part of dealing with depression and i know it sucks. I think people sometimes, most of the time don't know what to say to someone they realize might be depressed. wish it wasn't that way but it is and if it is someone you think you might feel comfortable talking to about you may have to let them know "he i have been depressed lately" and see what they say, they might be going through the same thing to or did in the past and you might have a new person to be able to relate to, you never know.

Just know that you are not alone on here, there are lots of people even not on here but ones around you that feel as you do.

Even though it's hard most of the time, Just speak up about how you feel to someone you know, sometimes thats all it takes to feel better.

it sucks, I thought I wasn't going to depressed gain. I felt ok for a few days, then it came back again. I just want to cry, & I almost did.

I was someone would ask, & that I would have enough courage to tell someone. I want to tell my teacher. He seemed to noticed that I was sad, because he mentioned to another teacher in the class. He also seems to be understanding of depression, & stuff like that. I just feel weird walking up to him, & telling him about my depression.

It takes courage to let others know about this; one of the symptoms of depression is that others notice you are sad. It took others pointing it out to me and then me confiding in them to make even a little progress. Reach out. If you're in school, then there should be some sort of counselor or counseling center on which you can rely...

What are the other people in your class like? Do they bully you, or would they make fun of you if they found out? Talk to the teacher, but then keep it between you and him if you can. I think I'm a little older than you maybe, but at university we have people who are called supervisors when you do a research degree. I could tell that my supervisor is picking up on something and she actually said to me once she noticed I don't look happy. I was stupid because I said everything is fine, and I wish now I hadn't. But, it was just a case of not being comfortable discussing stuff with this person, because she is one of those people who is always happy and will never understand how I feel. She always has a quick solution for everything, at least she thinks so, and does not realise the complexity of this stuff.

No, no one bullies me in that class. If they find out? I am not sure, & how would they find out.I go to HS.

He just seems really nice,& caring.I'm in special ED, & he always helps me out, even if I don't ask. Plus, we have talked about depression, he isn't like "just get over it", & other things like that. He understands that you just can't get over it, & that it is serious.We have talked about suicide too, both topics make me really uncomfortable,
He also noticed I was sad, which no one ever does, especially people close to me.

I know how hard it is, I have spent my whole life waiting for someone to notice that I am unhappy. I've always figured that if someone else could just ask, then I'd open up. I'm still waiting and the longer I've left it, the fewer and fewer people there are left to ask me, but worse than that, there is no-one around anymore to for me to tell. So although I'm being massively hypocritical and advising you to do someting that I've never really had the courage to do, please find someone to talk to and don't wait for them to make the first move. Be brave, we all care about you here.

I know your story... I'm sad that you weren't able yet to talk about it to someone else and ask for help.
My thoughts are on you, I hope you can get help and then the world looks brighter to you.
Things improve when you do that, and you already realize that you can't help yourself alone. Even us here, can't give you the help you need. Please talk to someone! The sooner you do that, the sooner you can be happy. It's hard, but that is perhaps the most important help you can give to yourself.
Hughs

My friends think I am so happy. I have one of them over right now,she is thinks I am really happy. Its weird my friends do not noticed, neither do my parents, but my teacher notices I am sad.

I feel the same way. I honestly don't remember the last time I was genuinely happy. Anyway, I think you should tell your teacher about how you're feeling. If he sees that you're sad, and you feel somewhat comfortable with telling him things, then I think you should confide in him. It would be good to know you have someone to talk to, especially if it's a teacher. Most teachers do care about their students and will help. I'm in high school too and there's a teacher that I talk to about how I feel. I wasn't quite sure if I could really tell my teacher what I'm going through, and I wasn't sure if I would be able to put it in words, but once I talked to my teacher, i was glad that did.

I'm so glad that you found someone "close" to you (your teacher) that is able to listen to you. I think it works better if the person knows you somewhat. I found it difficult talking to a therapist because no matter what she said, I was still opening up to a stranger, in a face-to-face setting. It always kept going through my mind that I was being judged and that she didn't know me, but was giving me advice. Even writing to these forums is more comfortable to me than speaking to someone, face-to-face. However, if it's someone you know and you know that person want's to listen, then that's great. All the best to you and I hope you find happiness sooner rather than later. Don't worry, your friends and family are always the last people to realise, because they cannot be objective when it comes to you, because it's usually the most difficult for these people to accept things happening in your life and they usually just dismiss it as "something" and try to make as though it doesn't exist. That's why you should always seek someone objective that has no obligation to tell you what you want to hear, but instead tells you the truth.

I think a lot of the time, people close to us tend to 2dimensionalize us in certain ways. They often forget to see the whole picture of things and sometimes fall easily into what we project to them and what they project on us. My mom falls really easily for the happy picture of a normal person I pretend to be haha.

Also, teachers see a lot of kinds of kids. I think it also has to do with exposure and sometimes the further you are from the situation, the clearer you can see. I'm glad people have taken notice though Please definitely try to reach out to anyone you feel comfortable with! None of my teachers, friends, or family noticed until I was already barely functioning at all. And even then I had to tell them my symptoms and etc. I'm glad you have people who can see clearly!

I want to get help, but I don't want to hurt other, I don't want them to worry, & I don't know how I would tell my friends I have depression. They judge really quickly when someone has depression, they think they should be happy, & that it is werid people are depressed. I don't know how to reach out. I always ask questions about getting help, but I never do because I am weakling & too scared.

I don't who I should tell, Should I tell my teacher? I don't want him to worry about me,and I don't know how to tell my teacher.

This is just horrible, I just really need to tell someone....but at the same time I do not want to tell anyone. But it is getting so hard to get through the day, hard to tell everyone that I am happy, but I am really depressed.

So true. You just get to the point where you can't pretend anymore. To be honest though, I could never tell my parents about this, they would never understand. They're so old-style and don't believe in stuff like depression or psychological problems. I see it when they watch movies and talk to their friends and stuff and I listen to the way they perceive things. I just know that I will get nowhere with them. The same holds for any of my friends and my study leader. They try to be proactive and over-analytical and don't just want to listen, so I can explain. That's why I would never ask them. I tried with my study leader and she missed the point completely. That's why I went to a therapist. However, your teacher sounds like the right person. I wish I had someone like that.

But, please don't hide your feelings. I did my entire life and it ruined my whole life to the point where I now have major depressive disorder (MDD). Once you get in this place you can't get out because your mind hides the solution from you, and you just see no way out. Once at this point you then need major interventive or medicinal help which I think I might need.

Gather the courage and tell your teacher. If you found someone you'd most likely be comfortable speaking to about your depression, take the oppurtinity to do so. i had the chance but i was too much of a coward, looking back it's something i greatly regret. I could have gotten the help i need. Wishing you the courage to do so. ((((fox))))

Thanks guys.... I just do not understand why my friends are so judgemental about depression. There really nicem There my best friends, but I could never tell them about depression. & I could never tell them that I want to kill myself, that I contemplate suicide.

How should I even bring it up to him? How should I get the conversation started? How much should I tell him?

I wish someone would come to me first, ask if im ok. Is there anyway I can have someone ask if I am, ok?

In all likelihood, you would probably have to initiate the conversation unfortunately. Many people who listen well will observe things, but don't want to pry.

The Fox & the Hound are you ok?

How can I start the conversation with him? Bring it up with Him?When would be a good time to tell him?

My two cents are just start it off abruptly, straight to the point. That you know he noticed your sadness. Bring it up the sooner, as soon as you can get a moment with him without others around, being interuppted. Good luck. ((((fox))))

I just don't know HOW I can bring it up with him.What I should say at first.

I guess im not the right person to say since im not a conversationlist.
Why dont you jump into it. Asking him if he has a minute so you can speak to him with no one around and Just say. Lately i've been really sad and it doesn't shake off, like depression.
Get the courage! And just stumble into it, once you start you'll pick it up easier.

I agree with starting off abruptly, but maybe by asking: "Do you have some time?" "There's something I would like to discuss with you, in private, if you have the time" "Can we schedule a time, when are you not too busy?". I think maybe taking control of this first step by yourself is actually quite powerful in itself, and I never realised that until much later, when I decided to go and seek help with a therapist. The way I saw it was, HEY, this depression is a burden to ME, so at least I want the dignity of dealing with it MY way and taking the first shot against it, so to speak. Not taking the first step and waiting for somebody to notice how you feel is a way of giving this disease unimaginable power over you, and also wastes much time of course, in which something could have been achieved. I never understood the depression that was hovering over my life for a good part of 20 years, and for 2 years after realising I was depressed I still did nothing. I now wish I had done something much earlier. You have that chance. By taking initiative, you might find that this first step in itself is a big one already. With almost all diseases in life, not wanting to do anything about it is the first hurdle it throws at you. You can almost view depression as a living entity in some regard. It LIKES living within you. It discourages you to take action because it DOES NOT WANT to leave. It convinces you that any action will lead to immediate failure, and brings up your past experiences to "prove" this to you - DON'T buy these lies that it tells you. Depression is nasty, and very cunning, remember that. I feel this entity within me sometimes and I can hear all of its lies, it's like a little voice in your head. Sometimes it's in the form of memories, or painful feelings coming back. Trust me, it knows how to screw with your mind. Right now, what it's doing is making you doubt, "should I ask the teacher?" "what will he think of me?" "gee, I don't know if this is such a good idea anymore". You've got to ignore all these feelings and reach out to your source of help. Sorry if I got a bit off-track here, but I don't know how else to describe this phenomenon, and how to encourage you. Hope this helps in understanding it a little more, at least how it appears for me.