failing

im failing some of my classes this semester right now.. I duno what to do if i do indeed fail. My parents lecture me daily about doing my homework but i just cant do it. They use their 'marital issues' and tell me about that, as an excuse, i suppose to guilt me into doing better in school.. this is really stressing me out... I cant do my schoolwork or projects, because it hurts to think, or move.

.. my parents say theyre scared to death that I wont make it as an individual in the adult world, because of my aspergers, anxiety and possible, depression... I recently read an article that people on the autism spectrum commonly have depression and anxiety, so i suppose it was inevitable.

So after taking Lexapro, I feel even worse. I cant concentrate, and all of my physical problems associated with all of this is even worse. I didnt think that was possible.

I wonder if I'll ever be able to hold a job, or motivation to do anything, because I feel that I can't do anything.. I feel like im being tortured going to school.. by my parents pushing me about it, waking up at 5:45 in the morning, dealing with ridiculous busywork, working in groups, presentations, and the pointlessness of most of the things I learn in high school. I wish I could express in words, the stress I deal with, because my dad thinks that Ive never had real stress. Obviously a 59 year old man knows about stress in the modern day public high school.

I must also say that many things in life, such as pompous awards shows, self important people, western religion and education taht does not apply to me, will forever remind me, that life is indeed, meaningless. and that it is constant suffering, with mindless pleasure in between.

Also, that people who commit suicide are right. It is indeed, a temporary solution to a permanate problem.. but im going to try to live life, and deal with this.. i wont quit yet.. but if my parents or people i am attached to go, and i dont have my feet on the ground by then, i dont know what other solution there would be.

ok, my rant is over.. sorry for wasting your time.

How long have you felt this way? Is it just since you got to high school?

no time wasted here, dear. you can write as much as you wish and we will read it and listen and support you.

could you talk to a school counselor and ask them to meet with you and your parents. sounds like your dad needs an "adult reality check".....with the problems you have, i agree with you that a 59 year old man should be understanding your problems a little better.

please keep posting and talking to us. don't worry about what you say or how you say it.......we just let "it all hang out" here and that way we get the help that we need. xoxoxo pat

*hugs* don't give up just yet! You just have to find what interests you! What do you love to do? Go to school for what you love doing. Wether it's art, or music or reading or writing. What ever it is you like doing go study that. I know there are a lot of meaningless classes you have to get through as well but if you take a mixture of classes that yo like and classes that you don't like at one time that makes it a bit easier to study for them. Hang in there! Things will get better.

Thank you everyone.
I've been feeling a little down since i started highschool (im in 11th now).. But i think ive hit 'rock bottom' since this summer. im losing all of my friends, i dont bother much with my looks anymore.. some other poeple seem worried about me. Id rather just stay home..I dont even want to talk to anyone in real life, I just want to stay home and be left alone.

well anyways, thanks for listenign to me.

Wish you the best. High school should be one of the best times in your life. Depression hurts. Try to take 1 hour a day and do something that you really enjoy. Also, follow your passion in life. You may not know what that is yet. Personally, I just try to take things day by day. That's the best that I can do right now. The fact that you are on this forum looking for solutions is a step in the right direction. I'm doing the same thing. You're not alone.
Hang in there, Cajun

I think I had your 11th grade. I can see see the lines of roofs out the window of my math class where I spent my time instead on in the class.

Maybe start from the "future" and work backwards? Assuming you'll get to 26, what would you like/imagine your life to be like then? Figure out how to get some of that? Do you have any interests at all; music, fantasy (great for writing) any classes you do better or worst in? I was good in history and English and now, at 56, I'll be getting a BA in history this May. I messed up my first attempt at college. But I've made it to 56 and now wouldn't have changed anything. It was uncomfortable, painful, and very hard at parts but it is "life"and I'm making it through. Other people do it, we can too.

(((((((((sshtuose))))))))))

Highschool is hard. It's impossible. And then dealing with parents on top of it -- yikes. I know the feeling, I really do.

I hope you're feeling better soon - and if you need ANY help whatsoever with academic stuff, send me a PM (or even just to talk). I've graduated from highschool, but not that long ago.

Take care of yourself.

Hello I hope things get better for you soon. You may be able to get a tutor to help you with your studies. You also need to talk to your therapist and Dr about the fact that you are struggling at this time at school, and you can not concentrate enough to do your homework. I hope things work out for you soon. Take care Soidhonia

thanks everyone. I used to have a lifelong obsession with the visual arts.. and aspired to be something with it, but now i see that I am too concrete and uninspired for it. and that, to make a career out of it, would completely ruin it, because of the struggle for recognition and acceptance for artists. It strips the meaning of it to me, of there ever was one. Nothing else im 'good at' besides repeating my programming with no intuition.

i dont know if im 'depressed' about my future, stress, or lack of meaning in life.. maybe its all 3.. or maybe its my brain chemistry. or maybe it was just inevitable. or maybe i just think about it too much. whatever.. but i do know that, if statistics are any use to my future, and people with my mental disorder , I have a 2% chance of keeping a job.

thats all

I have always been depressed, ever since 7th grade when I lost my grandmother. I've almost failed every class/grade so far and now I failed history and I have to take summer school! First actual class i've really failed. Now I'm in 10th grade. My parents have always pushed me too everyday with studying, homework, and whatever else but I could never concentrate. Grrrrr!!

But I know someone with aspergers, but he's has a really high self-esteem and actually, it's quite annoying! You're not wasting time, I acually kind of could relate except I don't have anxiety or aspergers but I do feel worthless and I can't do any work and I have parents pushing me. Just keep your head up, just try your hardest and if you can't do it don't get too down on yourself, there's other things in life you can enjoy.

If you ever need anything you can send me a PM. I'm usually online everyday.

Don't give up! I went to school in late 40's and it was way hard for me with depression and learning disabilities but I made it.... Just focus on the small stuff. Sorry you are having such a hard time.