confessions of little turtle

I see so many persons with mental illness....I see so much courage in the face of awful suffering...but there is hope...but go for the hope that works for you...

((((((((( little turtle ))))))))))

fuzzy don't let anybody take us down anymore....and lets not us take ourselves down....

what do you think of the saying-------------we have met the enemy and he is us...

I am definitely my own worst enemy.

i am not a very happy person....I don't know whether this is depression talking or not...
I don't really know much about anything...a lot of what I see about life I don't like or want...
I am so disappointed the way people are treating each other...and the way we treat ourselves..

I am so depressed and restless. I wish I had courage and hope. Do pray that I gain some.

you may have akathisia...

A doctor or shrink saying they don't know much about anything, this has to be a first I think you're very wise (((((( little turtle ))))))
I'm very disappointed in many people too (mostly the family of origin for me (and medics I consulted)
There is much in life I don't want or like
May there be more kindness and peace this year than last (and other years)

I'm a psychotherapist, and I suffer greatly with my own mental illness. Thanks, turtle, for giving me the courage to write this. I currently work full time, with a good practice, and I love what I do. But there are times when my bipolar depression comes out full force (like today), and I want to hide under a rock.

I feel so ashamed to write that. I feel like I will be judged -- how can a competent therapist work while she has depression? I get into my work mode, and I make it all work. I know I'm good at what I do, but as I write that I think I'll be questioned.

Thanks for your truth turtle.

Thank you everyone for contributing to this thread. It has taught me so much! And thank you Little Turtle for starting it!
I am a psychologist working with depression on a daily basis and also as you have described Little Turtle within a very cruel and uncaring system. So I will add my 2 cents' worth. I hope it can be useful.
I have often felt that I should not be working with people who are struggling mentally and psychologically because I am a depressive myself. I have learnt though that precisely because of my illness I can be useful. It has taught me understanding, humility and love. When I look back on what I was like when I was 30 years old I can see that I was not at all qualified to do the job. I thought that I had the answers. Now I know that the answers are listening with love and sharing. Like what we are doing here for each other. That is where the healing lies.
Healing does not always mean being free of whatever illness you have, but it means to share and love and not to judge.
Once again Little Turtle, thank you for sharing your professional experiences. The world of psychiatry is covered in a cloak of secrecy and matters are not discussed honestly.

you have my love roaming_bird and my respect....

Yes you are right. My doc has stopped risperidone but added another mood stabiliser to lithium SR 800mg - lamotrigine 25 to prevent recurrence of a manic episode.

You have my respect Roaming bird

Thanks for your truth - you and little turtle (and some others) give me hope that there are some good and caring shrinks and therapists out there

Reading some of your posts here, CONFIRMS You know a lot about a lot.
Thanks for sharing.
--Sounds like depression is tricking you (doubts) because clearly your advice (and warnings regarding medications, etc.) is so accurate and helpful.

I'm curious if you've ever reviewed articles on an anti-psychiatry website?
And although some of the statements on that and similar sites,
may be extreme (bashing almost everything psych MD's do),
your great understanding (happy medium that includes both pros and cons of treatments) is refreshing.

You care and are very appropriately outraged by common things that go on, that should not.

Thank you - Please throw away your doubts and don't let the depression
immobilize or slow U down.

If I thought all psychiatrists and therapists thought like you, I would not be so afraid to seek the treatment I need.
Unfortunately, in my experience (professionally) I've seen too many in the mental health field do more harm than good (especially with medications).

And their lack of compassion, which I might accept from other types of MD's (like a surgeon), seems almost damaging (abusive) when it's a psych MD (MH field) expected to improve somebody's emotional health

If you have any suggestions on how I can overcome my fear of both PSY doctors and pretty much the entire mental health field, please let me know. I've suffered too long, (getting worse not better) but too scared to get help.

dear pppp3---it is so hard to find someone that is really helpful...I did have one psychologist who cared about me...I loved her...she helped me so much...
but the good ones are hard to find...

I'm happy for you that you found a psychologist who cared about you ((((( little turtle )))))

I too (as mentioned elsewhere) have found it hard to find a provider out there who actually cares, those without compassion do harm imo

(As some psych meds can do harm - Paxil for example is extraordinarily hard to "wean" off and I wonder if my long time taking that contributed to my allergies now to psych meds )

Thanks pppp3 and little turtle for sharing

I read through this thread all the time, even if I don't chime in anymore. But I wanted to say thanks to those who have been posting here lately about their struggles as members of the therapy field. I think I've mentioned it in this thread before, but I'm a therapist as well, and still struggle with my own problems. I started because I want to help others not to have to struggle the way I have. It's difficult though, especially when you're trying to get yourself better. I feel like I've been subtly discriminated against by therapists and psychiatrists who I've gone to for treatment, just because I work in the same field. It's hard to find compassion, even if they've gone through some of the same things. I feel like a lesser person because I'm trying to better myself while working.

thank goodness there are people like you to help out...

Why am I only "useful" to support others?
Why is it so hard for us not to take ourselves down?

wow fuzzy....this is the big question...why do we take ourselves down...
I really don't understand this....maybe somebody here can help us with this

For me it's an old habit. T is teaching me this. Other people have taken me down, very far down, and I think that's where I belong. And I'm comfortable there. Not because I like it, but it's what's familiar.