In a Major Depression

You could say that I had it all in my life but now it is gone… I took an early retirement and all my life savings including my retirement money and put it in a business. I started getting behind in the business and one day not long ago I left it. That’s right I got so depressed that I just up and left. I decided to commit suicide. I had the gun so I drove out to the desert and after two weeks of getting up the nerve to do it the stupid gun didn’t fire. So I then chickened out and came back. The place closed and I put people out of work, I owe money to everyone and my fiancé left me because of what I did or try to do. I did just get a job so I won’t be living on the street but I have everyone calling me to get their money I owe them. I am so depressed that I am still thinking the easy way out is to end my life. So I have nothing left, no one to talk to and my mow x fiancé keeps telling me that I am a total looser. I have no money to get a lawyer to get me out of the mess I made and I just feel like giving up.

Hello I am sorry that you are struggling at this time. Do you have a therapist at this time? If you do have a therapist then you should be able to get a case manager to help you sort out some of the problems you are going through at this time with the business and creditors since you live in the United States. A case manager and therapist can also help you with housing, and where to find resources for food and utility bills. The County Department of Jobs and Family Services and the Salvation Army are generally valuable informants in receiving the help you would need at this time. If you do not have a therapist, I would highly suggest going to the Local emergency room to get the help you need at this time, to get you set up with a mental health team in your local area. There is also Leagal Aide which can help you in time with some osf your financial issues and possibly for FREE or a reduced rate. I hope things get better for you soon. Take care and best wishes. Soidhonia

Aw gee, you've been through the ringer and back. You don't have to have a lawyer to declare bankruptcy even for a business. If you were smart enough to open a business, I'm sure you can find the right papers to tell you how to close it down and be free of it. You aren't the first, nor will you be the last, that has done this.

The good thing about life is, well, you get to begin again at any moment. I'm sorry you are so depressed, and yes, that needs to be addressed with a professional when you can make the call. I'm sure there are free social services there that you can tap into. They also might have a social worker who can give you resources on legitimately closing that business and "going out of business."

As an adult, we can begin again because it's all in our control. Do you remember Trump when he went bankrupt? I mean, here was a millionaire! He isn't bankrupt any more. Many millionaires have lost it all more than once... and rebuilt.

Nothing in life is worth taking your own life for. Change what you don't like. If people fall by the wayside, then they won't be there to enjoy you when you rebuild and succeed. New places, people... who don't know your "history" and don't care..but see you for who you are... once you are on your feet again, then you can decide how you want to rework the past, if you're able. But don't try now, it won't work. Build new. You have your whole life ahead of you to do what you think needs to be done by you... and that's not take your own life.

I'm sorry you are so frustrated. I'm glad you are reaching out. If you need links for information on the internet, I'm sure members here can come up with some. There are even attorneys who are members here

Hang in here with us!

I am so sorry that so many things have happened in your life recently. Killing yourself isn't the answer. Pulling yourself out of the hole is......and you can do it with help. Try to find some help and keep us posted. We'll help you through this.......xoxoxo pat

Sorry to hear all this suffering that took you near to the idea of killing yourself.
Just one thing: see, I am a total jerk at business. But I believe that the moneymaking ablity is overrated today. You want to kill yourself because your business failed? Well, don't do it at all, but NOT for this reason, especially.
Try to have your depression cured. Your depressive tendencies might have been the reason of your failures, even when depression was not evident.

The best of luck

I feel empty. I have so much to give to people but nobody wants or needs me. I feel like I am heading for a brick wall. Financial matters are risky, I cannot find work, I can't make decisions, I feel like I am spiraling downward. I know it is depression. I know that perspectives become distorted. I know that there is some sort of classification of my multiple problems (social anxiety, low self esteem, depression, perfectionist, teetering on eating disorder, etc.) what I don't know is how to fix it. Doctors won't treat me. Counselors don't give straight answers. It feels like I am walking in a circle around the problems but not hitting the target. I feel empty.I feel lifeless I feel guilty, I feel angry but don't know who I am angry at or why.