Depression Support

05:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deilla

Something that helps me is having daily goals or intentions. It could be as simple as cook a meal or take out the trash. But I try to have something. Many times I include relaxing because I enjoy working on my hobbies. So I always have a reason to get out of bed in the morning.

I hope everyone is managing well. Hugs to all.

I too am trying to make a daily plan and follow it. I don't manage to do much still I try to accomplish as much as possible. I also try to keep some hours aside for relaxing(especially being on PC) and pursuing my hobbies like painting and reading but I don't find the time to do them mostly as I spend more time laying down in bed most of the day.

I try to include the following in my daily plan:
1)exercise
2)shower
3)brush teeth at least twice
4)housework like cleaning the house, doing the dishes, cooking, laundry
5)going outside the house(Now I try it once 5days a week. I plan to increase it to twice 5days a week in a month. I find it very difficult to get dressed and go out in the morn is at present. I don't work so I am not forced to do it)
6)study/read story book/pain/music/watch tv

I have a prob with 4) and I still don't interact with people much. I have to improve on these.

May 04, 2018, 04:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I suggest skipping reading the news online and substitute that with reading part of an easy story book or other easy book of some interest, or online. Just a suggestion. As I can’t take meds at all, and other stuff, there are...

It’s good you aren’t giving up hope. Love to you

PS have you thought of an online therapist?

Thanks fuzzy. Your advice helped. Now I try to watch news on tv/read news online and also read some easy story book or some science book like something on elementary physics,chemistry,biopsychology(my fav), or basic programming like C.

And like I already mentioned, we don't have online therapists in India. It's sad.

May 04, 2018, 05:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by little turtle

I am going to follow desiree and fuzzy now...they are both very supportive..

as far as relationships go---I have the hardest time with my wife and kids...
I am very sensitive about anything they do or say...

I guess DBT may help here. I am very sensitive about what my parents do or say. I am trying to improve on this.

little turtle · May 04, 2018, 06:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desiree2006

I guess DBT may help here. I am very sensitive about what my parents do or say. I am trying to improve on this.

good going desiree

12:57 PM

I need help with the following :

I find it difficult to get out of bed in the morn. It’s not that I am awake and stay in bed all morn but I can’t force myself to keep my eyes open even after 8hrs of sleep and I go on sleeping till late morn. I have noticed that I feel refreshed only after about 9.5hrs of sleep. I also lay down several times in the day as I feel depressed and lethargic. If it's just the anxiety and the feeling that I don't want to do anything, I can still force myself out of bed, but if I feel very tired, worn out and sleepy, which I do most of the times, I just can’t pull myself out of bed. I guess anti-depressants can help with this but my psych doc is reluctant to prescribe me one as I have bipolar and he is scared that my depression may turn into mania. I have had two manic episodes in the past two years.

I also have a problem with time management. I know what I should be doing and when I should be doing it(I have a daily plan) but I just don't do it. I get stuck on a particular task(especially reading) and keep putting everything off until it all just snowballs on me, and then I get so stressed out I can't cope with it.

If anyone of you had a suggestion it would help me greatly. I m tired of this oversleeping, lethargy and procrastination.

May 05, 2018, 01:23 PM

I feel hopeless....I was hoping to move to USA by end of this year and get married to my fiancee. But now it's not going to be before the end of next year due to visa complications and the long processing time. The uncertainty and the long wait is getting me restless and afraid. He is the only one I got who loves me and understands me fully. Idk what to do except keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best.

Fuzzybear · May 05, 2018, 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desiree2006

I feel hopeless....I was hoping to move to USA by end of this year and get married to my fiancee. But now it's not going to be before the end of next year due to visa complications and the long processing time. The uncertainty and the long wait is getting me restless and afraid. He is the only one I got who loves me and understands me fully. Idk what to do except keep my fingers crossed and hope for the best.

Fuzzybear · May 05, 2018, 01:41 PM

I must have had a “bad vocabulary” as I hadn’t even heard of certain words which keep recurring before I first spoke to a doctor about my severe anxiety, CEN etc

It was reduced to a label (wrong) - thanks “doctor”

mountainstream · May 05, 2018, 01:50 PM

Fuzzybear · May 06, 2018, 12:25 AM

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr !!!!!!!

Aaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!!!!!!

YoucancallmeFlower · May 07, 2018, 05:07 PM

Hi Sweetie;
First of all, I notice you use the word 'should' a lot. As if you have this
impossibly long list of rules. May I suggest you begin to eliminate a
few of these rules?
For example, you have a rule about only sleeping eight hours. Why? If your body needs nine hours or ten or only six, isn't that a better indicator of how long you should sleep? And when you are mired in a depression, as you are right now, and you are taking meds, why would
you expect to be able to jump out of bed all bright eyed and bushy tailed? No one in your situation can do that, sweetie. So maybe that is another rule you can eliminate.
Take an hour to wake up. Have coffee in bed. Go online for half an hour. Do some writing. Make your list for the day. And celebrate everything
you accomplish.
I just see so much of myself in you and the way I used to be. Until I
finally realized I don't have to be perfect. And not having those expectations of yourself is so freeing. Because without all the shoulds,
you don't have to beat yourself up anymore.
I wrote those two threads for you, about finding solutions but never
received any indication if you got anything out of it. Its okay. I don't
require validation. I will keep trying to help and offer suggestions because it is helping me at the same time.
Here are a few more tips for housework. Since I haven't gotten anything
done in the past three days, except taking care of my cat, I have a lot
to do today as well. (But I did enjoy myself-watchinh movies, taking
naps and playing with my cat; stuffing my face and just being lazy. Once upon a time I would have allowed my inner critic to beat me up and call me a lazy slob. Instead I chose to celebrate mg indolence so
I wouldn't miss one minute of the fun!)
I know its a radical way of looking at it, especially when you've been
dogged your entire life for not being perfect. But maybe it's time to get
the toxic people out of your life. I find the phrase f*** off works well.
So--use your kitchen timer. Set it for 15 minutes and work like the
devil. When it goes off--stop! Set it for 30 and just play. Do that a few
times and you will be amazed at how much you get done!
Hope this helps sweetie. I have more tips but I'm worn out.
Have a wonderful birthday. And please, be patient with yourself.

Love, Flower

May 08, 2018, 02:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by YoucancallmeFlower

Hi Sweetie;
First of all, I notice you use the word 'should' a lot. As if you have this
impossibly long list of rules. May I suggest you begin to eliminate a
few of these rules?
For example, you have a rule about only sleeping eight hours. Why? If your body needs nine hours or ten or only six, isn't that a better indicator of how long you should sleep? And when you are mired in a depression, as you are right now, and you are taking meds, why would
you expect to be able to jump out of bed all bright eyed and bushy tailed? No one in your situation can do that, sweetie. So maybe that is another rule you can eliminate.
Take an hour to wake up. Have coffee in bed. Go online for half an hour. Do some writing. Make your list for the day. And celebrate everything
you accomplish.
I just see so much of myself in you and the way I used to be. Until I
finally realized I don't have to be perfect. And not having those expectations of yourself is so freeing. Because without all the shoulds,
you don't have to beat yourself up anymore.
I wrote those two threads for you, about finding solutions but never
received any indication if you got anything out of it. Its okay. I don't
require validation. I will keep trying to help and offer suggestions because it is helping me at the same time.
Here are a few more tips for housework. Since I haven't gotten anything
done in the past three days, except taking care of my cat, I have a lot
to do today as well. (But I did enjoy myself-watchinh movies, taking
naps and playing with my cat; stuffing my face and just being lazy. Once upon a time I would have allowed my inner critic to beat me up and call me a lazy slob. Instead I chose to celebrate mg indolence so
I wouldn't miss one minute of the fun!)
I know its a radical way of looking at it, especially when you've been
dogged your entire life for not being perfect. But maybe it's time to get
the toxic people out of your life. I find the phrase f*** off works well.
So--use your kitchen timer. Set it for 15 minutes and work like the
devil. When it goes off--stop! Set it for 30 and just play. Do that a few
times and you will be amazed at how much you get done!
Hope this helps sweetie. I have more tips but I'm worn out.
Have a wonderful birthday. And please, be patient with yourself.

Love, Flower

Thanks Flower! You are awesome

Your tips are helping me a lot. I read those two threads about finding solutions but I will read them again. As they didn't relate to anything particularly concerning me I didn't reply.

Your tips will help me a lot. I beat myself a lot for not being able to follow my daily plan but you are right it stresses me out and I would prefer to be more happy, calm and peaceful and enjoy life. Your tips about sleep and cleaning are surely going to help me. I'll try them out. And I'll try to be more patient with myself.

Please keep posting on this thread. And thanks for helping me out. Love to you too.

YoucancallmeFlower · May 08, 2018, 03:19 AM

No worries.

The thing about the solution is not the particular situation--it's the
Method. Look at your own situation and apply the Method. Use
logic to find the easiest and most beneficial solution for YOU.

Does it make more sense now?

Also, I found a fabulous organization and cleaning site called 'A Bowlful of Lemons.' Lots of great suggestions.

One thing I really like about you is that you don't give up. I know how dark it looks for you lately, but your courage keeps on shining through.

Keep it up!

Cocosurviving · May 08, 2018, 12:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by YoucancallmeFlower

Hi Sweetie;

First of all, I notice you use the word 'should' a lot. As if you have this

impossibly long list of rules. May I suggest you begin to eliminate a

few of these rules?

For example, you have a rule about only sleeping eight hours. Why? If your body needs nine hours or ten or only six, isn't that a better indicator of how long you should sleep? And when you are mired in a depression, as you are right now, and you are taking meds, why would

you expect to be able to jump out of bed all bright eyed and bushy tailed? No one in your situation can do that, sweetie. So maybe that is another rule you can eliminate.

Take an hour to wake up. Have coffee in bed. Go online for half an hour. Do some writing. Make your list for the day. And celebrate everything

you accomplish.

I just see so much of myself in you and the way I used to be. Until I

finally realized I don't have to be perfect. And not having those expectations of yourself is so freeing. Because without all the shoulds,

you don't have to beat yourself up anymore.

I wrote those two threads for you, about finding solutions but never

received any indication if you got anything out of it. Its okay. I don't

require validation. I will keep trying to help and offer suggestions because it is helping me at the same time.

Here are a few more tips for housework. Since I haven't gotten anything

done in the past three days, except taking care of my cat, I have a lot

to do today as well. (But I did enjoy myself-watchinh movies, taking

naps and playing with my cat; stuffing my face and just being lazy. Once upon a time I would have allowed my inner critic to beat me up and call me a lazy slob. Instead I chose to celebrate mg indolence so

I wouldn't miss one minute of the fun!)

I know its a radical way of looking at it, especially when you've been

dogged your entire life for not being perfect. But maybe it's time to get

the toxic people out of your life. I find the phrase f*** off works well.

So--use your kitchen timer. Set it for 15 minutes and work like the

devil. When it goes off--stop! Set it for 30 and just play. Do that a few

times and you will be amazed at how much you get done!

Hope this helps sweetie. I have more tips but I'm worn out.

Have a wonderful birthday. And please, be patient with yourself.

Love, Flower

Hello there,

Your tips were really good. My daughter’s counselor suggested the timer method when she does her chores. I “use to” make a daily plan and post it on another thread. I stopped that. Now I see what I get completed each day then post them.

02:31 PM

Hi!

As I already discussed, I have made a daily plan and I try to follow it as much as possible. Im sleeping adequately, trying to eat healthy and not too much of junk food, exercising etc etc but everything seems like a chore. Im not enjoying anything Im doing. I feel anxious and depressed most of the time. Recently the anxiety has increased, Im getting strong panic attacks. The panic attacks are freaking me out. At those times I literally want to scream and run away somewhere. There's a feeling of hopelessness too though I never give up hope coz that's the only option I have. I don't want to die. I love life. I want to live and be able to enjoy life once again.

The only time of the day I enjoy is the time I spend chatting with my bf and when I m on PC. I listen to soothing music coz it's supposed to make me feel happy and peaceful but it's not being of any help.

Something weird. Im feeling separation anxiety when my bf hangs up the phone. But he has to sleep and get things done too. I understand. I tell myself Im grown up and yet I can't help it. As soon as he hangs up, the panic attacks start!

This never-ending depression, anxiety and panic attacks are making me really frustrated. Idk what to do. I can't go to a therapist coz therapists here in India are not that trained and not willing to spend much time with the client. Rather the advice/solutions I receive on PC are much more helpful. Moreover my psych doc is reluctant to prescribe me an anti-depressant to counter the depression as Im bipolar and have had two brief manic episodes in the past two years. I have my psych doc appo this Mon. I'll ask for an anti-depressant. Hopefully he will understand this time. Coz the anhedonia, lethargy and sadness are too frustrating to deal with all the time.

But meds alone won't help. I wish I could come up with solutions/coping strategies.

Thanks for listening.

little turtle · May 10, 2018, 04:52 PM

desiree you are working on it...very important

YoucancallmeFlower · May 10, 2018, 05:11 PM

Since your current meds are not working (obviously) it might be time to
insist on an anti depressant. The danger of a manic episode is not worth what you are suffering now. Your doc has to listen to you--your
life, your body, your disorder. Or it might be time to get a new doc.

You have such a great heart, cookie. I was never blessed with a
daughter, but if I had been, I would be so proud if she had the spirit
and the heart you have. And you don't even realize how amazing you are!

Put one on General you might enjoy. Twist on the List.

Now I really have to go get some smokes before I start making a list of
things to do to my evil slumlord that would really f*** up his day.

Cocosurviving · May 10, 2018, 07:04 PM

My day has been good. I took my daughter to school. Then came home and had breakfast. My mom called me to ask that I not be mad at my grandmother anymore. She said, “I know she gets on your nerves but that’s just the way she is”.
I told my mom I’m not dealing with her. Because if I get sick I have no one to look after my daughter and dog. My mother said she would since my daughter is back on a ADHD med. My daughter actually is not on a ADHD. My asked if I would just go by grandmother’s house every other day. I told her no thank you that I needed time to myself.

I had an allergy appt today. I’ve been breaking out in hives even though I’m on two meds. The doc called me in another med and wants to get some labs. I only have Medicare which does not pay 100%. The billing specialist in the allergy clinic office said she did not know my out-of-pocket cost. I’ve been having anxiety about that

YoucancallmeFlower · May 10, 2018, 07:31 PM

Thank you. Sorry you are having problems with the hives. Must be very annoying. Hope you get some good news on the tests.

And bravo for refusing to buckle under to family pressure and manipulation--shame on Mom for trying to guilt you back into a
a relationship you obviously find toxic. Stand your ground.

Flower

May 11, 2018, 03:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by YoucancallmeFlower

Hi Sweetie;
First of all, I notice you use the word 'should' a lot. As if you have this
impossibly long list of rules. May I suggest you begin to eliminate a
few of these rules?
For example, you have a rule about only sleeping eight hours. Why? If your body needs nine hours or ten or only six, isn't that a better indicator of how long you should sleep? And when you are mired in a depression, as you are right now, and you are taking meds, why would
you expect to be able to jump out of bed all bright eyed and bushy tailed? No one in your situation can do that, sweetie. So maybe that is another rule you can eliminate.
Take an hour to wake up. Have coffee in bed. Go online for half an hour. Do some writing. Make your list for the day. And celebrate everything
you accomplish.
I just see so much of myself in you and the way I used to be. Until I
finally realized I don't have to be perfect. And not having those expectations of yourself is so freeing. Because without all the shoulds,
you don't have to beat yourself up anymore.
I wrote those two threads for you, about finding solutions but never
received any indication if you got anything out of it. Its okay. I don't
require validation. I will keep trying to help and offer suggestions because it is helping me at the same time.
Here are a few more tips for housework. Since I haven't gotten anything
done in the past three days, except taking care of my cat, I have a lot
to do today as well. (But I did enjoy myself-watchinh movies, taking
naps and playing with my cat; stuffing my face and just being lazy. Once upon a time I would have allowed my inner critic to beat me up and call me a lazy slob. Instead I chose to celebrate mg indolence so
I wouldn't miss one minute of the fun!)
I know its a radical way of looking at it, especially when you've been
dogged your entire life for not being perfect. But maybe it's time to get
the toxic people out of your life. I find the phrase f*** off works well.
So--use your kitchen timer. Set it for 15 minutes and work like the
devil. When it goes off--stop! Set it for 30 and just play. Do that a few
times and you will be amazed at how much you get done!
Hope this helps sweetie. I have more tips but I'm worn out.
Have a wonderful birthday. And please, be patient with yourself.

Love, Flower

I have the same problem with studying as I have with cleaning. Moreover bc of my short-term memory issues it gets difficult for me to process, remember and recall a thing. So I thought of trying the same method with studying - 30mins extensive studying-30mins break-30mins extensive studying and so on. This way my brain won't feel so tired and it wont be that difficult to understand a topic.

I hope this works.

09:20 AM

Im trying to use the TIP skills of DBT when my panic attacks are freaking me out, especially paced breathing and paired muscle relaxation. I tried them today and they helped a bit. I m still learning the skills and I guess I'll improve more when I can do them better.

I m also thinking of practising them after I wake up in the morn and freshen up and before going to sleep.

After I m thorough with the TIP skills I'll practise the Distracting skills and the Self-Soothing skills.

(PS: There are 4 TIP skills - tipping the Temperature of your face with cold water, Intense aerobic exercise, Paced breathing and Paired muscle raxation).

02:28 AM

Hi! I want your suggestions/advice as I am a bit worried about my new ad.

I am on prozac 20mg. I started y'day. Haven't yet felt the benefits but I feel more refreshed after waking up today.I have bipolar. I have already asked a couple of friends about prozac and they are a bit concerned that prozac may trigger hypomania/mania in bipolar individuals. I am scared of another manic episode and having to be locked up in a psych hospital again. But I guess I needed the prozac to get me out of bed. There are days when I lie in bed the whole day hiding my face in the pillow and however much I try I cannot push myself to get up and get on with my daily routine. Apart from the prozac I m on a mood stabiliser(lamotrigine 200mg), an anti-psychotic at a low dose(amisulpride 50mg) and buspar(7.5mg + 10mg). I was wondering if these could prevent prozac from swinging the bipolar from the depressive to the manic phase.

Rose76 · May 24, 2018, 04:31 AM

It's not possible to predict how these 4 psych meds will counter-balance each other. Your doctor ordering these meds knows at least as much as the friends who expressed their concern, which I think is valid. If your doctor knows about your history of being hospitalized for mania, then this doctor is likely already mindful of you being at risk for a recurrence of mania.

Drugs don't determine everything. Try to focus on having a plan for daily activity. Some days you might be able to accomplish only one thing. But give yourself credit for even that. Some days it can be a major achievement just to shower and wash your hair. It is so tempting to think that "First I need to feel better, before I can focus on getting anything done." (I get that way myself.) The reality is that often we need to change how we are behaving in order to change how we feel. "Fake it, till you make it." - can be good advice. I hope your anxiety is easing up.

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