Originally Posted by happycheeks

I think it's a great idea. Does it work with anger too?

Yes, I have heard the DBT Connections videos talk (on YouTube) about controlling ager.

I told my therapist that I feel overwhelmed by how big the DBT workbook is.

She said that you customize it for what works for you. She wants me to do the deep belly breathing, and since I like affirmations and replacing negative thoughts, she gave me another statement to say to myself to combat the perfectionist problem that makes me so miserable and keeps me from getting my work done.

A good job is good enough.

Oh, I want to say this too—I told my therapist that I had a counselor in my 30s tell me I had a problem with perfectionism and black and white thinking. But she didn’t tell me what to do. I was thinking I should have worked on it back then. A lifetime of this torture has been a lot to endure.

She said therapists didn’t have the research and techniques they have today.

Ah, here is this thread!

Yesterday, I was struggling a bit and listened to one of the DBT Peer Connections videos on YouTube. It talked about watching your thoughts and identifying whether they are real or not.

And how emotions are what drive action. But if the thought isn’t real (what evidence do you have?), then you should take the opposite action.

I realized that a lot of my thoughts in part “don’t fit the facts.” They are worries about things that are exaggerated in my mind.

I took a few minutes to think them through, and took the opposite point of view, and went on with my day.

[dexter]

I am in a full fledged year long DBT program and I can say it has helped a lot with my well being. There are four major areas that it focuses on: Mindfulness, Distress Tolerance, Emotion Regulation, and Interpersonal Effectiveness.

Key_Tones the ice water thing is part of the Distress Tolerance module for when emotions are really out of hand. With time the Emotion Regulation module helps so that less Distress Tolerance is needed for more long term solutions to feeling and maintaining wellness.

The Opposite to Emotion Action is part of the Emotion Regulation module and is one of the aspects that has done me really well. I tend to isolate myself when I am depressed and to ignore responsibilities and the Opposite to Emotion Action activity helps me to stay connected with friends and get my bills paid.

For me the most effective parts of DBT are the Mindfulness and Grounding teachings and the Opposite to Emotion Action activity. Mindfulness works like a magic trick for my anxiety.

Dexter—that is really great.

My therapist at first told me she uses DBT.

After I told her I bought books, including the workbook she has, she said she just uses elements of it, but isn’t an expert.

It is such a large program—it looks like a lot of work. That’s when she said to just pick out elements that work for me.

I was thinking I might have BPD because of my sanity score, but she says I don’t present that way at all. So, I don’t know if I should seek out a program. I work long hours four quarters of the year and would miss class. I might look for a different therapist.

Anxiety is my biggest problem; it’s good to hear that this works for you.

[dexter]

I agree that there are lots of elements and some work better for me than others, and based on the feedback in group skills class and here on PsychCentral different elements work for different people.

It does require a lot of work and practice, so pick the elements you like and practice them often in non-critical situations until they become natural for you. For example I found that Mindfulness worked almost instantly for me when I learned it but it took some time before it came to me to use it in anxiety provoking situations. I found that I was thinking about Mindfulness after the anxiety attack was over and had done its damage. In time Mindfulness became natural for me and I found myself using it in many situations that I hadn't thought of like sitting in traffic in my car.

After you find a few that work don't discount the others... you may find others that work with a little practice. If with practice they don't help, discard them. But practice is key. Once I realized Mindfulness could work for me I started practicing it just sitting at my desk whenever I would think of it and then started going for intentional Mindfulness walks outside.

Dexter—thank you for your kind reply. Yes, I find myself not doing what I’ve learned, especially at work. It takes effort.

[dexter]

It takes less effort with practice... At least for those aspects that are working for me. Mindfulness and opposite action come to mind pretty much automatically for me now, although opposite action can still be tough depending on the situation. Right now I'm stuck in bed all day and opposite action isn't helping me with that.

[Altec]

This has been a long time coming. I was given a DBT skills manual while I was in a treatment facility almost 10 years ago. Didn't think much of it, thought it was not applicable to me at the time. Many fellow clients are very loyal to it. Still didn't think much of it. Stuff the manual in my bookshelf.

I had a relapse due to missing medications about 6 years ago. So after I was stable, per doctor's recommendation, I attended a weekly DBT session for about 2 months. Mindfulness, interpersonal effectiveness were the two chuncks that we went over. We did a lot of the meditation using 5 senses part of it, starring at the carpet, noticing its texture and pattern, feeling a fuzzy toy and be mindful of its texture and how it felt in your hands etc.

I didn't think that this was helpful in making the problems go away. Granted, I didn't have a clear idea of exactly what I was struggling with. Clinical depression turned into psychotic schizophrenia were the two issues that I am certain I have. I'm not delusional or exhibiting symptoms of schizophrenia anymore now that I'm on an awesome med. I consider my situation very stable. I have a full time job, living on my own etc. But I still struggle a lot with negative thoughts, cognitive dysregulation and interpersonal chaos. Btw, these are straight out of the skills training DBT handbook 1 st Ed. For as long as I remember, I couldn't put words in to describe what I was struggling with. When you can't even describe what you are struggling with, no way will healing start. I'm glad that the DBT manual has helped reveal so much of the issues in my mind.

Well, you may ask what got me to pick up DBT again? Why am I using DBT language to express myself? Well, about 3 weeks ago, I had this random thought about looking at some of the tools I've gained over the years that are suppose to help with coping. I was looking for whatever I had, copies of treatment manuals etc. Turns out DBT skills training manual and this CBT manual were the two I've found. Anyways, I am not quite sure what it is, but I am A lot more receptive to the ideas and words this time. I know I'm being long- winded, and thank you for reading this far, but I just want to say that DBT has really helped me with my thinking. Please, don't throw your DBT training resources away, revisit it 5 years later, 7 years later or maybe now. It has helped me tremendously with my depressive thoughts( not clinical depression, but just remanents of that which changed my thinking ever since). In conjunction with a good CBT skills manual, I am practicing the skills everyday for 3 weeks now, and I can tell you the effect on my thinking is profound. Please feel free to PM me if you are in recovery for anything and would like to explore or pick up DBT and or CBT again.

I keep meaning to look into DBT...

So since I finished the DBT group for a couple of months now. I learnt vaildating other people and also asking people questions in a socail setting. Since I have socail anxeity. But what I've notice is I vaildate these people I know say through Facebook messager and ask them questions. Which they answer too. But I never get vaildation back or even ask how I am doing.
I'm starting to feel drained. It takes a lot of effort to think carefully how to vaildate someone make sure I'm not dismissing them. So it takes a lot of brain power put of me.

I dont know what to do. Or meet people that give and take back forth to each other. Or what I'm doing wrong in my communication.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by TeaFruit

So since I finished the DBT group for a couple of months now. I learnt vaildating other people and also asking people questions in a socail setting. Since I have socail anxeity. But what I've notice is I vaildate these people I know say through Facebook messager and ask them questions. Which they answer too. But I never get vaildation back or even ask how I am doing.
I'm starting to feel drained. It takes a lot of effort to think carefully how to vaildate someone make sure I'm not dismissing them. So it takes a lot of brain power put of me.

I dont know what to do. Or meet people that give and take back forth to each other. Or what I'm doing wrong in my communication.

If they never validate you back or ask how you’re doing maybe they either aren’t very good friends/contacts or possibly haven’t learnt these skills. I’m not sure. It can be draining to be kind and supportive and to receive no support
or even acknowledgment back. Support is better when it is a two way thing unless you’re specifically there to be their support person or are someone who doesn’t like talking about yourself. I haven’t done DBT since I’m in the UK So these are just my thoughts..

Are there ways you can meet some other people,.. I’m not an expert on how to do that

Maybe you could ask them if you’ve been of any support to them?

And has my reply been of any support/help to you

[Thirty shades]

I am in the UK too.

Would someone be able to explain what DBT is and if it is helpful?

[Rohag]

Just for reference (pardon if already posted): PsychCentral's Overview of Dialectical Behavior Therapy.

DBT skills are basic skills used to help find comfort in your everyday environment. They allow you to focus on what you needs are. They help you understand your emotions and allow you to find normal reactions to your emotions. DBT skills are often taught in group environments for those with BPD and family members of someone with BPD.

[Wisemind]

Im not very good with this way of messaging im sorry,

I have been involved in dbt for 5 weeks tomorrow,i can see why its so highly recommend but i have Lso beenon an activate your lifecourse which wS similarbut not as informed as the dbt,howeverit didgive e the advantage of knowing what tools were going to be useful.

I would recomend the dbt to anyone who meeds to understand the way we thing and to identify what we are realy feeling by noticingphysical sentations Nd real putting your mind into the discory helpsyou focuson what you canchange as well as grounding and calmingthe mind.

What i will say is it reallycant hit hard on week 4 which they do warn you about and they arebery good at reasuringyou the reasonis for your benifit, imstruggling withtnis weeks homework as i have to practisradical acceptence but its difficult and the good thingwithtnis is theyare pretty deter ind to get you to feedback and theydont let you fadeimto the background as i e tried to dothatsgot ,e. Ore focused on the weeks work as they do want to see somthing from you no matter what lol. I hope this is helpful and im sorry if its not easy to read im not good with long messages sorry. X

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I think there’s more and more evidence that DBT can be of help with different disorders.

As I’m in the uk (and as I’m a bear ) the doctors aren’t interested in helping me.

I was wondering if people who have found anything helpful in DBT (or any therapies other than standard 3 to 6 session CBT) would add to this thread.

Thank you to all here who are still fighting, and still trying (which includes me although sometimes I don’t know why.. as every time I approach a doctor (irl) I’m ... not helped)

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I think there’s more and more evidence that DBT can be of help with different disorders.

As I’m in the uk (and as I’m a bear ) the doctors aren’t interested in helping me.

I was wondering if people who have found anything helpful in DBT (or any therapies other than standard 3 to 6 session CBT) would add to this thread.

Thank you to all here who are still fighting, and still trying (which includes me although sometimes I don’t know why.. as every time I approach a doctor (irl) I’m ... not helped)

I heard that DBT is helpful. I have never tried it. Perhaps I should.

[bpcyclist]

I took a full course on it--twice. I do not have BPD, but I still find it very helpful for my bipolar 1 and addiction stuff.

[Wisemind]

in my Dbt session on monday i asked about Dbt being available in the uk and was told its big here in wales but not so much in other parts but it is in someplaces but again that depends on your area and if it withing the area of support

Its hard at times but i recommend this very much it is very informed and it is eye opening in many ways