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  #101  
Old Feb 05, 2019, 10:08 AM
Anonymous32451
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day 3 of feeling completely void of emotion

and that's all their is to say
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  #102  
Old Feb 05, 2019, 11:51 AM
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Sadness, dread and lonely.
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‘Everything is happening for my good.’
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  #103  
Old Feb 05, 2019, 11:56 AM
Anonymous41141
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I talked to my friend last night and felt like it didn't go very well. I was upset because of not getting hot water for a shower. It was one more thing going wrong at where I live, you know, that place I want to leave. I felt like he was not helpful. I didn't sleep well last night because I felt clammy and cold. I was scared that I was going to get sick.

I didn't feel good emotionally when I got this morning. Fortunately I didn't get sick. Had cereal for breakfast, which was fine. And then I washed the dishes and got hot water. So I decided to shower this morning. I rarely ever shower in the morning. I shower at night always. It felt nice after the shower but it was real cold and damp in my place. Left for work a little later than usual. Got to a busy intersection where the traffic light didn't work, so it backed up traffic. I was 15 minutes late getting into work. I would have been on time or just a couple of minutes late if it were not for that intersection.
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  #104  
Old Feb 05, 2019, 12:41 PM
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Got to push myself and get things done.
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  #105  
Old Feb 05, 2019, 08:01 PM
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I bought a giant SAD lamp from a garage sale a couple years ago for $5. The thing was probably $50-$100 new. So it was a steal. After a rough morning I used it today for 25 minutes. It worked ok. I wish these things gave off heat as well though.
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"Good morning starshine.... the earth says hello"- Willy Wonka
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  #106  
Old Feb 05, 2019, 09:37 PM
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88Butterfly88 88Butterfly88 is offline
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Wasn't too depressed today but was kind of numb.
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  #107  
Old Feb 06, 2019, 08:13 AM
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I don't feel depressed, but I'm not doing well. I'm wasting time. I got nothing done yesterday that I should have. I'm disorganized and go through the day with no plan and no system for accomplishing anything.

So I guess I should make a plan for today. That sounds straightforward.

I feel overwhelmed when there's really no good reason for that.
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  #108  
Old Feb 07, 2019, 07:33 AM
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Rough week...I want to disappear....
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  #109  
Old Feb 07, 2019, 10:38 AM
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I'm bored and sleepy. Nothing else to do but sleep. Sleep is all there is.
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‘Live for now,’

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‘Everything is happening for my good.’
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  #110  
Old Feb 07, 2019, 12:07 PM
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Hugs to all
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  #111  
Old Feb 07, 2019, 10:06 PM
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Monticello Monticello is offline
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Exhausted. Back to work after surgery. 9 hour day with a 2 hour commute each way due to snow and traffic. Not depressed, not happy.
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  #112  
Old Feb 08, 2019, 10:52 AM
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Depressed today.
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  #113  
Old Feb 08, 2019, 12:55 PM
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I'm awake today. Busy doing chores. Going to relax now. Maybe color. I feel lonely and blue.
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‘Live for now,’

‘This too shall pass,’

‘Everything is happening for my good.’
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  #114  
Old Feb 08, 2019, 03:18 PM
Anonymous32451
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I showered today and listened to some good music.
mood not much better though- not really at a level where I notice a diffrence

still feels like I'm just going through them otions
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  #115  
Old Feb 08, 2019, 03:59 PM
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I improved a lot yesterday. I got stuff done. Today I want to take it easy.
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  #116  
Old Feb 08, 2019, 06:24 PM
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I cleaned my room. I don't feel as bad as before, but I get a weird feeling.

Possible trigger:
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Crazy, inside and aside

Meds: bye bye meds
CPTSD and some sort of depression and weird perceptions

"Outwardly: dumbly, I shamble about, a thing that could never have been known as human, a
thing whose shape is so alien a travesty that humanity becomes more obscene for the vague resemblance."
I have no mouth and I must scream -Harlan Ellison-
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  #117  
Old Feb 08, 2019, 09:13 PM
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I did just about nothing today. I just failed to even start.
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  #118  
Old Feb 08, 2019, 11:48 PM
Anonymous41141
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It was a long draggy day at work with not much going on. This morning at work I got talking to a guy who lives near me. I told him that I wanted to sell my place. He was telling me that I shouldn't. He was going into reasons why I shouldn't and then his cell phone went off. He told me to hold on and wait for him. He talked on the cell phone for a while and I told him I had to go. Just as well because I didn't want to argue with him.

Feeling kind of blue tonight. I plan to look a place tomorrow. This will be the first place to look at.
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  #119  
Old Feb 09, 2019, 04:45 AM
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Feeling all alone, anxious and restless. I think I need more sleep and some meditation.
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‘Live for now,’

‘This too shall pass,’

‘Everything is happening for my good.’
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  #120  
Old Feb 09, 2019, 06:47 AM
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I've been awake for a few hours.

After having a good day Thursday, I fell into a pit on Friday. Thursday I was up and about, getting things done. I felt cheerful and glad to be busy. Friday was a wasted day, spent mostly on the couch.

I don't want today to be another wasted day. I have important things to do in the upcoming week to qualify my bf for some of his benefits. There is paperwork I have to get together for these matters. I hope I can find what I need. I'm very, very disorganized in the paperwork department. This causes me awful anxiety. Then I get depressed.

It's been a miserable night. Worry, worry.
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  #121  
Old Feb 09, 2019, 07:01 AM
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I woke up angry today. The world is a terrible place.
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  #122  
Old Feb 09, 2019, 10:17 AM
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Not doing well, insomnia is bad again, life is a mess, can’t stop crying. Wondering why I am still here.
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  #123  
Old Feb 09, 2019, 10:56 AM
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Deilla Deilla is offline
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Feeling like everything is hopeless. Very sad. I just want to sleep all day. I have no one. No support. That's never going to change. I'm just too old and fat.
__________________
‘Live for now,’

‘This too shall pass,’

‘Everything is happening for my good.’
Hugs from:
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  #124  
Old Feb 09, 2019, 11:47 AM
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pixielouwho pixielouwho is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deilla View Post
Feeling like everything is hopeless. Very sad. I just want to sleep all day. I have no one. No support. That's never going to change. I'm just too old and fat.
I understand, I have no real support aside from Internet groups and therapy weekly. It’s not enough sometimes when you feel you’re drowning.
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  #125  
Old Feb 09, 2019, 01:12 PM
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mountainstream mountainstream is offline
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I’m feeling depressed.
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