Today seemed like a repeat from yesterday. But slightly worse. I got to one point during the day when it was on the tip of my tongue to say, "I quit". It was that bad. It seems like it's getting worse as the days go by at work. My manager requested me to do a "tool inventory". I didn't know what that was! So I replied back asking what that meant. I felt like an idiot doing that. I got a reply back from the manager saying it was the tools from the maintenance man, who just retired. That's what I thought. I still had no clue on that, so I ended up having to call the ex-maintenance man It appears that signs are all around for me to leave that place very soon.

[88Butterfly88]

I'm feeling moderately depressed today.

[Deilla]

I've been limited all day with what I could do. I had to use my walker today. But I stayed busy with music. So I guess that was a good distraction. Maybe tomorrow I can move around better.

It was a bad day at work. It seems like it's getting worse as time goes on. Tension and drama to deal with instead of just doing my regular job, in which there's next to nothing to do in my regular job. Last Wednesday I said that I came close to quitting. Today I came much closer. Now I feel like I should have submitted my resignation. I have a plan on how I can make it without having to go to that dumb job anymore.

The weekend's here but I don't feel all that joyful about it, like I used to. It would
be nice when a weekend comes and I can say to myself that I won't be going in on Monday and for a good many days after that (more like indefinitely!).

[Deilla]

I am ill today. I tried to go to the ER but the wait was too long. I'll call my GP on Monday. I'm resting today. I feel very stressed, worried and upset.

Typical Saturday today. Was busy and pretty nice but nothing exciting, at least socially. Today went by so fast. It seems like the times being away from my job goes by so fast and being at work goes by so slow.

[Breaking Dawn]

I'm better right now than I was this morning. I'm hoping this improvement continues. So many things I need to do.

[Mountaindewed]

I’m not very depressed today. I took a 20 minute walk both yesterday and today. Exercise does make you feel better. My old therapist for the most part was a feather in the breeze again today. It’s been 3 frigging months since our last session. Last night was a bit rough. I don’t know why. It’s confusing though. I know she won’t take me back because of the transference and ED stuff. Then some days she’s out of my mind. So I really should just let her go. When I see pictures of her on Facebook I’m just like “whatever.” When I think of our sessions I miss her.

I was kind of depressed about my appearance today. But I’m working on fixing the stuff I can fix immediately and I’m hoping to be able to get working on the long term stuff.

Being at work today was much better than I thought it would be, so that was nice. It was fairly busy at work today, too. I had just posed on the Work And Careers forum; In A Whirl Heavy Decision thread about what happened at work today.

[Buffy01]

Since I started taking medicine for my depression and anxiety. I only had five anxiety in one month and one day of feeling depressed in one month. Where I felt horrible every single day and having depression everyday all day long.

[Breaking Dawn]

Ups & downs. I'm ok at the moment. This day was harder than yesterday, but better than previous days, so that's an overall improvement.

[88Butterfly88]

Woke up kind of depressed but feeling somewhat better now. I think taking my morning meds helped.

[TishaBuv]

At least I had two good days! But down today. I regret making a facebook post because it ended up being triggering. I feel bad because of a polite comment from an estranged sister (there will be no other personal contact from her ever), and a husband who never ‘has my back’. Grrrr, I hate that I have a hang up with this having my back issue. I constantly see other people treat each other with this support, I don’t get it from my circle of empathy challenged family. (Not all family, just some)

[Deilla]

I feel very tired and very depressed tonight.

I have finally turned in my resignation at work and we agreed that the 4th of June will be my last day. Other than that, nothing much happened at work except for a little bit of drama, like it has been, in which it's making me glad to leave.

[Breaking Dawn]

Originally Posted by will19

I have finally turned in my resignation at work and we agreed that the 4th of June will be my last day. Other than that, nothing much happened at work except for a little bit of drama, like it has been, in which it's making me glad to leave.

[TishaBuv]

I’ve been dealing with a chronically frustrating situation with the same triggers in a relationship. It happened again, so it brought me down yet again. I did have four good days thought up until then! But now I am no longer crying and ‘acting out’. I am calm and just want to find the strength to do what is best for me moving forward. No one should have to live with this kind of stress.

I realize my part in it. I have a need that probably stems from a disorder. My h just can’t wrap his head around the way he needs to act to meet that need. It was simply, really, not even that strange, but obviously something completely impossible and opposite of anything he can fathom. He cajoled and lied to me thousands of times that he gets it and will do it, but he never does, so we fight. I see the futility and have had enough. I am completely set in this faulty thinking I’ve adopted and rigid. I can’t change it. And he can’t do it, although he keeps lying that he will but then just doesn’t.

I need help getting away from him and learning how to be alone and at peace.

Typical Saturday today for me. All the things I needed to do went without a hitch. So much has been on my mind about leaving my job pretty soon. There are some blue feelings and even a little bit of anger. Other than all of that, nothing much else to report about. If it all goes as planned for next week, then next Saturday will be my last one that I will be doing all of those things that I usually do on Saturdays. It's weird and it doesn't seem possible!

Just now I read an article online about what it's like to work in the final two weeks before it ends. It was a great article describing what it feels like and suggestions on how to handle the final days, including the last one.

[leomama]

Definitely thinking I’m dealing with a major depression. I know I should probably get help for it.

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[EnnuiCat]

In the midst of a major depressive episode. Pushing everyone away and isolating. It's just so hard.

[Breaking Dawn]

Hi, @EnnuiCat! Thank you for joining us! Please hang in there & keep posting, ok?

[Cocosurviving]

I recently learned about Mastodon. The platform was highly recommended as it is *not controlled by a corporate giant seeking censorship on topics that impact BIPOC communities. I registered and downloaded one of the apps that’s supposed to work with Mastodon. So far no luck getting the app to work with Mastodon. I’m definitely not on my laptop often to make post and build a follower base.

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[Cocosurviving]

I actually believe I might be in the same boat as another person in our Xolair group. I believe Xolair injections might be making my Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria worse. I do write down...journal my flare ups.

I’m happy for folx that Xolair has been a game changer for Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria however it is misinformation to make posts that GUARANTEE results just because particular individuals are having success. The manufacturer does not GUARANTEE successful results. No pharmaceutical manufacturer can GUARANTEE successful results.

Everyone does *not have success with Xolair for Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria.

After having my second Xolair injections [300 mg] for May 2021. I called my immunologist office answering service. I spoke with a nurse on call and was instructed to go to a local urgent care clinic.

I had to be given higher dosages of steroids [and monitored] to calm down my Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria. Which I started also having Angioedema swells [top and bottom lip + my right thigh]. It’s painful and I’m on bed rest. My right thigh continues to swell with Angioedema.

It’s hard to think positive and hold out hope that these Xolair injections will begin to help when I’ve experienced zero improvement. I’ve continuously been instructed to go to urgent care or a hospital. Which my flare ups always happen in the wee hours of the night.

These medical bills are stressing me out. I’m already making payments but continue to return to urgent care or a hospital as instructed which creates more medical bills.

I’ve applied for medical financial assistance through a local hospital. I’ve been checking my mail waiting on a response. I also have multiple autoimmune diseases [Fibromyalgia, Hashimoto, Asthma, Atopic Dermatitis and Alopecia] and experience a domino effect.
My Fibromyalgia pain has been horrible as well. I treat my Fibromyalgia with medical cannabis, bath bombs, herbal teas, supplements and traditional medicinals. I don’t believe in pain medications [for me].

I’m not seeking any advice. I’d just rather post here because some individuals can relate to being frustrated with chronic illnesses.

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[Cocosurviving]

I actually no longer take any psychotropic medications. I was mis-diagnosed and I was so hurt. I had so many records to have amendments added to.

Laws protect healthcare providers and mental illness providers with little regard to the outcome of their mistakes and mis-diagnoses.

Myself and my adult daughter always experienced adverse reactions to depression, anxiety and mood stabilizers. We think the reaction from the mood stabilizers is because of being mis-diagnosed.

I actually have Hashimoto and if I could get rid of one of my chronic illnesses....hands down it would be Hashimoto. My teenager also has Hashimoto. Hashimoto impacts several systems in the human body including moods.

My teenager and adult son are diagnosed with ADHD. Both were taking Focalin XR. My son was rushed from his college to a local hospital in Tennessee. His primary care recommended he no longer take Focalin XR.
About six months later my teenager began experiencing horrible adverse reactions to Focalin XR. Both my kids had been taking Focalin XR for several years.

Fast forward me and my children don’t believe in any psychotropic medications FOR US. We’re also not interested in the medication merry go round.

I treat my depression, anxiety and PTSD with self care. I created a list of things that I pick from to do when I feel depression, anxiety or PTSD.

When I tried tapering off Lithium it was a bih. Doctors are not as knowledgeable as society would paint the picture. I actually contacted the pharmaceutical manufacturer. They gave me all the steps and explained it to my psychiatrist. This all happened in early 2019.

Mood stabilizers made my personality horrible. I was on edge all the time, had little self control and my moods were all over the place. I actually get pissed thinking about it. I broke many bridges that I’d never try to repair. I don’t mind people that walked out my life because of my depression and chronic illnesses.

I’ve been dealing with a lot of grief. My primary care recommended a place and my immunologist. I’m not going to either and providers don’t listen. I’m not going to any therapist that is clueless about my culture based on lived experiences vs textbook reading. I also don’t care for therapists that follow organized religions...not my cup of tea. And they can never leave their dogma outside.

Working out and running was really helping but I’ve been placed on bed rest so much. I’m back on bed rest again. I have a nurse coming out next week. I made sure she was aware I require masks to enter my residence.

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[Deilla]

I'm very sad and lonely today. I have nothing to do and no one to talk to. I may just sleep all day. That's the best I can hope for.