[Breaking Dawn]

Originally Posted by Deilla

Today I had a meltdown. I was so stressed that I cried for about 8 - 10 minutes. I'm upset at how fearful I am. It makes me very sad. I'm trying my best to cope with it.

I'm so sorry, @Deilla! You've had a lot of things to deal with lately & it's just too much. I hope that things will get easier for you soon. Hugs & love to you!

[Deilla]

Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn

I'm so sorry, @Deilla! You've had a lot of things to deal with lately & it's just too much. I hope that things will get easier for you soon. Hugs & love to you!

@Breaking Dawn, thank you! I'm going to relax for the remainder of the day. I might even take a nap. I hope you are doing well, my friend!

[Breaking Dawn]

I am doing well today. I have everything I need right now, & I've enjoyed some of my favorite things so far today.

[Cocosurviving]

It seems that each time I have a sinus infection or respiratory infection it triggers both of my rare diseases.

Thursday, March 11th 2021- I have my consultation with my new immunologist. I have my fingers crossed that he will be a provider that listens.

Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria- I’ve tried several antihistamines over the years and the only one that works for CIU is hydroxyzine...unfortunately it’s a sedative.

Xolair is not a good match for me...it’s too risky in regards to the side effects and other autoimmune diseases that I have.

Hereditary Angioedema-I have one Firazyr injection remaining. My previous immunologist did not feel comfortable prescribing me a preventative medication. He said, the side effects were too much for my health.

I’m having a day of extreme frustration.

I’m tired of itchy chronic hives, not regular hives that feel like my skin is on fire covering my whole body and face.

I’m tired of my face, feet and hands looking like I was jumped into a gang.

I’m also tired of fatigue, sore throat and runny nose.

I’m tired of having so many chronic illnesses that finding treatments is difficult.

I’m also so hurt that I’ve lost multiple family members. The grief is so real. I know my ancestors are in my corner and watching over me but the pain of missing my family members hurts deeply.

I’ve been continuing to eat fresh fruits, vegetables, drinking a lot of water and non-caffeine herbal teas. Hoping this sinus infection will pass which would calm my flare ups. I purchased a new Fibromyalgia cookbook. I’m looking forward to feeling better and being able to cook the recipes.

[Breaking Dawn]

Hi, @Cocosurviving, I hope your new immunologist listens to you. He should. You sound very knowledgeable. And I'm so sorry you have lost so many loved ones. I know how painful that is, & it takes a long time to adjust, even to lose one. I wish you luck & spiritual guidance. Please stay in touch & let us know how things go, ok?

[Deilla]

I'm doing okay today. I sort of feel numb and like I don't care anymore. I started my day early.

[Mountaindewed]

My depression is still ok. My old therapist is basically out of my mind now. Although I did have a brief thought of her this afternoon. Then I said to myself “just tell the new therapist that.”

[88Butterfly88]

My depression is moderate today. I did mange to get to a virtual event which cheered me up a bit but still not feeling great.

[Cocosurviving]

Yesterday (Wednesday) I made a lot of calls and returned emails. I’m excited and nervous about meeting my new immunologist. I hope he listens and doesn’t have an ego. I’m starting to pull through this dang sinus infection.

[LittleEarthquakes]

Miserable and uncomfortable with myself.

[Rose76]

Still got little motivation.

Today wasn't a feel good kind of day. It was very slow at work today, but it was busy yesterday. Not only was it slow and boring at work today, I felt like I was striking out at solving some issues I was facing. Feelings of disappointments and defeat. I hope that tomorrow will be a better day.

[Rose76]

I need to leave the TV off and clean the house. I'ld feel better, if I got something done today. So far this week, it's been like I just gave up. That leads to depression.

[Deilla]

I'm doing okay I guess.

[88Butterfly88]

I'm feeling down and in a funk.

[Aardwolf]

Feeling very isolated today and trying not to let it get to me. It will pass, but it does suck some.

Very slow at work today again. At least there was a nice pizza lunch. A woman at my job put it together because she's leaving and got another job. So many at the place, including myself, are going to miss her. She was always nice to me.

I came home feeling very depressed today and already dreading Monday. Isn't that silly? But I worked out and then lined up some nice music while working out and at dinner, and that made me feel better. Plus the dinner was good and so was desert that was provided for me at work. Feeling OK now.

[Deilla]

I had a difficult morning but I'm doing better now.

The morning is half way over now and I'm half way through cleaning my place. Felt very depressed this morning. I talked to my friend last night and he depressed me a lot, which he does so many times. So I sent him a message saying that we should cool it for a while. He's very negative and critical and hardly says anything encouraging. It's very hard to let go the only friend I have.

I'll be finishing up the cleaning and then have lunch and shop. Nothing much after that.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by will19

The morning is half way over now and I'm half way through cleaning my place. Felt very depressed this morning. I talked to my friend last night and he depressed me a lot, which he does so many times. So I sent him a message saying that we should cool it for a while. He's very negative and critical and hardly says anything encouraging. It's very hard to let go the only friend I have.

I'll be finishing up the cleaning and then have lunch and shop. Nothing much after that.

I’m sorry that your friend is pulling you down. I wonder if he know what this is doing to you? Maybe talking negative is normal for him and he doesn’t realize how it is affecting everyone else around him.

[Buffy01]

I been feeling really depressed lately because people lately have been extremely rude toward me.

Originally Posted by Buffy01

I’m sorry that your friend is pulling you down. I wonder if he know what this is doing to you? Maybe talking negative is normal for him and he doesn’t realize how it is affecting everyone else around him.

I'm not sure if he's aware. I've told him; and there were many times he and I had split up. I was the one to split up with him and told him why or what he does to me to make me feel bad. He's very good at giving out criticisms but not good at receiving it for himself. I notice lately that he seems more depressed than before, even though he tells me that he's fine.

It's very hard to let go of an only friend I have. The time before this time that we split up, it was very nasty. But later he tells me that he misses me a whole lot. I don't know why since he seems to have a fairly good amount of other friends. It's amazing to me on how people who do not seem likable can do pretty well with having friends. Recently I called him because I was in a bike accident. I recalled that he was in one and I wanted to know how he handle it. He was very helpful to me about it. But then we got back together and it went pretty good. Afterwards, it's back to the old crap again.

[Cocosurviving]

Saturday was decent. I never say my day is “great” and the term “good” makes me equally as uncomfortable. Why? I’ve had depression since I was 16 years of age. Depression is like any other chronic illness....chronically flaring up. I don’t like labeling my days as “great or good” because of the off chance I jinx myself. Yes, seriously and toxic positivity (which is gaslighting) will not change my view. I had a close friend with bipolar, asking about her day was a trigger.

Although I’m no longer in remission, my autoimmune diseases and rare diseases impact my life more than depression. I’m still cautious about labeling my days. Most of my flare ups happen after midnight. A few months ago, I was having a fun day. I was asked about my day and got caught up in the fun I had I said, “it’s great.”

I **** you not, that night I had a horrible Chronic Idiopathic Urticaria flare up. I actually don’t see the purpose of sales clerks who are complete strangers asking customers about our day. A simple greeting would suffice. I doubt these sales clerks wanna hear about my crappy insurance coverage and **** load of medical bills. I usually respond with, “I’m alive.”

[Yzen]

I'm making tiny adjustments to life and hope they add up to major changes. I trying to learn to pause my reactions to things and am encouraged by it. I injured my lower back a few weeks ago and caring for my injury has been another day-to-day tiny adjustments. It is slowly healing (i hope).

[Deilla]

I'm sort of hopeful today.