[flockpride]

Originally Posted by IB splitting

So I'm going to be five O on the 27th. What is strange though is I see people around my age or older and I think man I'm glad I'm not that old. So I'm guessing that the reflection in the mirror is not what it appears. I just don't see myself at this age. In (my) mind I feel like 18 or something where did all this time go.. I just can't figure it out. We can be any given age at any given time so strange..I'm not sure who is in the mirror, is it really me??

Bite to remind the bitten...

I see old people (my chronological age) and also think, "I'm not like those people. I'm not old like that."

[Gr3tta]

A good chunk of Thurs. is lost to me. Just complete blank.

During that time i sent several bizarre text messages to my wife. She called me and we agreed i wouldn't drive. But, having no memory of this, i then showed up at her work to pick her up. At home, my shyest little came out crying and requesting to sleep here where the dogs could protect her.

I hate lost time.

Originally Posted by Gr3tta

A good chunk of Thurs. is lost to me. Just complete blank.

During that time i sent several bizarre text messages to my wife. She called me and we agreed i wouldn't drive. But, having no memory of this, i then showed up at her work to pick her up. At home, my shyest little came out crying and requesting to sleep here where the dogs could protect her.

I hate lost time.

(((((Gr3tta))))

losing tyime is horrible- and i'm sorry you lost so much of it

[darkpurplesecrets]

Feels like I am spinning. Too afraid to sleep. Been up for nights now and only getting some rest and little sleep during the day.

Time seems to disappear and it is dark out again. Day just doesn't last.

Memories hitting one after another. Can't stop crying or feeling so afraid. The nights are the worst.

Trying to be strong and not bother anyone else. Just wish at times I wasn't.

That feeling of running is strong.

So tired. Just feel like I am falling yet I am sitting up straight. And our arms feel like they are on backwards..........

[Claritytoo]

Originally Posted by darkpurplesecrets

Feels like I am spinning. Too afraid to sleep. Been up for nights now and only getting some rest and little sleep during the day.

Time seems to disappear and it is dark out again. Day just doesn't last.

Memories hitting one after another. Can't stop crying or feeling so afraid. The nights are the worst.

Trying to be strong and not bother anyone else. Just wish at times I wasn't.

That feeling of running is strong.

So tired. Just feel like I am falling yet I am sitting up straight. And our arms feel like they are on backwards..........

Hug yourself really tight and tell yourself that your are safe and that everything is ok. Sleep is very important. It allows your mind and body to regenerate and you wake up stronger. Hug yourself and sleep

Originally Posted by darkpurplesecrets

Feels like I am spinning. Too afraid to sleep. Been up for nights now and only getting some rest and little sleep during the day.

Time seems to disappear and it is dark out again. Day just doesn't last.

Memories hitting one after another. Can't stop crying or feeling so afraid. The nights are the worst.

Trying to be strong and not bother anyone else. Just wish at times I wasn't.

That feeling of running is strong.

So tired. Just feel like I am falling yet I am sitting up straight. And our arms feel like they are on backwards..........

Go....2...sleep...whatever it takes. It's so worth it . . Pleeeease. I try drinking, it's good for 5 hours at least. .

[Gr3tta]

My sister is coming to visit. I know she will want to talk about my DID diagnosi. I just hope i can explain tthings well.

Over did it on drinking the night before last, so we stayed sober last night. Since its
Monday, we need to make plans for working. Really not sure what to do. Denied for disability.

our dog got hit by a car yesterday, (though thank goodness it didn't do too much damage), and i lost my budgie. just dropped dead in it's cage.

i've decided to call it quits with budgies... no more in this house, oh know

apart from that same old. not been sleeping (at all), pissed off with this summer weather (though it is nearly autumn now) and just about getting by

last night a new cd arived from amazon- bottom line by john prine (country/ western singer), spent weeks looking forward to it only to find out that the
album's actually live. (i hate live recordings). in most cases the singer sounds better in the studio

Sick and tired of living like this. I hate thinking about all this. I want to hide. Think I will.

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Sick and tired of living like this. I hate thinking about all this. I want to hide. Think I will.

Hey y'all. My emotional parts are getting the better of me. We need to refocus. Their worries and fears are overwhelming at times.

[Gr3tta]

My sister went home from her visit yesterday morning. We actually had a really nice visit. She asked me lots of questions about DID and i answered to the best of my ability. She seemed genuinely interested and not condescending. She didnt do anything iinappropriate like ask for soandso to come out. Plus -she made me kitchen curtains!

Everyone inside seem to be doing well. We've come to a decision regarding careers which is good...

[Claritytoo]

I was at the beach today and a mom and her small daughter, about 1plus year old were walking from the car to the beach. The mom had her daughter dressed nice with colorful clothes and was holding her tight. She was telling her that she loved going to go to the beach with her. I don't ever remember my mom telling that she loved going anywhere with me. When I heard it I smiled than felt just a little pain inside. I would really like to let the pain go. Just be able to appreciate that moment. Maybe I am just feeling a little lonely.

[Izo39]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

as this part of the forum does not have one..

how are you doing today?

long night of constant switching last night

not really any plans for today. but tonight we're having a roast dinner. (partly because i promised i would in another thread)

well I just had a very stressful and long day at work I seem to always screw up somehow.

I plan on going to sleep cause that seems to be the only way I can NOT mess up. anyway I'm sorry I don't mean to be so negative.

[Gr3tta]

Trigger is for si.

Just got home from er. Feeling really stupid now. Especiallysince i accidentally badly cut two fingers too.

Bad. Bad. Bad.

I need a hug

It's like I'm in a daze the past few days. Unfeeling, emotionless, careless, numb, bordering depression, just going through the motions of living.

[Georgia Bridge]

Got taken over by someone I don't remember meeting before. Lonely. Lonely. Alone. Does not recognize people and places. But less anxious than me. Me having multiple personalities is just not possible.

Originally Posted by Georgia Bridge

Got taken over by someone I don't remember meeting before. Lonely. Lonely. Alone. Does not recognize people and places. But less anxious than me. Me having multiple personalities is just not possible.

Me too sweety. I just gifted with a broad range of mental perspective.

Since we let the fems present, life has been messed up. It's time to cap them off again to bring the circle in tight where we can achieve.

Say good bye for now. (Of course it's going to be a battle since they tasted freedom). But we must rise to higher standards of supreme being, success, achievement, stardom, gaining ground, winning.

Okay, our indistinct parts are trying to run us... Time to get positive. 1 dollar nail polish sucks

[Willowtrees]

My name is Phoenix. I split off from someone. I think it just happened. Or is still happening. I have memories of being them. But i talk to them in my head like theyre different. Yesterday they wrote to me. Im a little bit scared. I feel old and new. Seems like birthname only comes out to spit out new people. I was her. I was her and i was J. Now im someone else. Very confused.

Hi Phoenix! Nice to meet you Hun.