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  #376  
Old Jul 03, 2021, 03:55 AM
Anonymous32451
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ReveuseTroublee View Post
I feel like I am never going to have a future... Be part of society at all. I feel so hopeless.
I have not given up yet though...
Idk...
All is too much right now...
I need therapy and help but I never found someone who can be of a help... Idk...
It will take time and it is a process.


I am glad you're here with us

it's good that you're not giving up
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  #377  
Old Jul 03, 2021, 03:57 AM
Anonymous32451
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positive of the day: yesterday when I had my mcdonalds, they put 22 nuggets in the bag in sted of the usual 20, and only charged me for 20

defenetly not complaining. extra yum!
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  #378  
Old Jul 03, 2021, 05:10 PM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ReveuseTroublee View Post
It is really difficult where I live to find specialists.
I can relate to that. And ''bad'' ''help'' tends to be so much more harmful than no ''help''.
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  #379  
Old Jul 04, 2021, 04:07 PM
stahrgeyzer stahrgeyzer is offline
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It took me months but finally found a DID specialist who took my insurance. He diagnosed me with DID and then said I should get SSI(I think that's the one he said). I kept saying no. One day he drilled me for 50 minutes with a frown on his face trying everything to get me to do it. He stressed me out so much that I ended my DID therapy.
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  #380  
Old Jul 05, 2021, 12:33 AM
Claritytoo Claritytoo is offline
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I am so angry. I want to ****ing destroy everything around me. I felike I could kill someone. I am so angry I used to take a bat and smash what ever the **** was in front of me. I don't want to die i.just need to explode. I have to explode. **** everything I am no going to kill myself. I need to explode .**** you **** I need to explode and I will feel better.
  #381  
Old Jul 06, 2021, 02:41 AM
ReveuseTroublee ReveuseTroublee is offline
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I do not want to live like this but I can not kill myself either I do not know what to do.
I can barely take care of myself. I am scared to go out, to hurt others or myself.
I can not lie. I can never fake anything.
Others are there and control my actions.
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  #382  
Old Jul 06, 2021, 04:51 AM
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Breaking Dawn Breaking Dawn is offline
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Having problems.
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"Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot)

"Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller)

* * * * * *
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  #383  
Old Jul 06, 2021, 09:31 AM
Anonymous32451
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I feel like ****

yesterday, my fibro pain was so bad I felt restricted in movement (like really restricted) for 40/50 minutes, I could do nothing with it, just sit where I was

forced myself to eat something, which just made me nauseious, and then, like the other 364 days of the year, I had no sleep and intense flashbacks

today I have done nothing but eat junkfood, listen to music, and have backpain. it is hardly the life of luxury
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  #384  
Old Jul 07, 2021, 04:35 AM
Anonymous32451
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I am so sick of inadequate food.

you know it's bad when you have dinner, and you feel hungrier after it than before

blah need to eat something that's actually tasty

and here we go again.... doing nothing with my day. woohoo
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  #385  
Old Jul 07, 2021, 09:40 PM
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gotta ''love'' mean people

and mean words

NOT
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  #386  
Old Jul 07, 2021, 09:56 PM
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Lots of dissociation.
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"Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot)

"Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller)

* * * * * *
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  #387  
Old Jul 07, 2021, 09:57 PM
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Mean people SUCK
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  #388  
Old Jul 08, 2021, 10:33 AM
Anonymous32451
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fuzzybear View Post
Mean people SUCK


they do, and I'm currently trying to block someone on gmail for that exact reason
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  #389  
Old Jul 08, 2021, 11:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by raging vortex View Post
they do, and I'm currently trying to block someone on gmail for that exact reason
I hope you are able to block them quickly. Idiots are such a bore, some of these bullies are.....
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  #390  
Old Jul 08, 2021, 01:35 PM
Anonymous32451
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I keep smelling a clean out the shower smell like someone's used scents and oils

it's not coming from me (I've not showered today), and their is no one else here

weird..
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  #391  
Old Jul 08, 2021, 06:43 PM
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This SUCKS
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  #392  
Old Jul 09, 2021, 07:01 AM
Anonymous32451
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I have been having a bad stomach ache

once again, the issue is food. this time not because it didn't agree with me, this time because it isn't enough. I have been struggling with food all week really, need to do better.

had my shower today which hurt a lot
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  #393  
Old Jul 09, 2021, 10:31 AM
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Breaking Dawn Breaking Dawn is offline
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I am not me so much of the time.
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"Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot)

"Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller)

* * * * * *
Hugs from:
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  #394  
Old Jul 10, 2021, 03:57 AM
Anonymous32451
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pretty sure (well 90 percent sure) that we have a new alter called liv (or olivia)

mcdonalds was good yesterday. much needed as well. feeling a lot fuller now
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Thanks for this!
Breaking Dawn
  #395  
Old Jul 10, 2021, 12:50 PM
stahrgeyzer stahrgeyzer is offline
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I feel very dissiated like I'm not here. Lot of parts speaking lately.
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Thanks for this!
Breaking Dawn
  #396  
Old Jul 10, 2021, 06:08 PM
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This afternoon... not sure about it
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  #397  
Old Jul 10, 2021, 07:36 PM
stahrgeyzer stahrgeyzer is offline
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Feeling strange and confused. Our system bought 17 bottles of 80 to 100 proof liquor. Some are empty. But I can’t stand liquor! I want to tell my therapist but I’m afraid she’ll make me go to the psych ward again or just end our therapy forever
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  #398  
Old Jul 10, 2021, 10:18 PM
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Breaking Dawn Breaking Dawn is offline
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I understand this!! God bless you, dear friend!
__________________
"Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot)

"Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller)

* * * * * *
Hugs from:
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  #399  
Old Jul 11, 2021, 04:59 AM
Anonymous32451
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I really don't care about tonight's football final. all these people making predictions and getting excited for it... blah

just end the football for another year all ready. not a sports fan

can you tell yet?
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  #400  
Old Jul 11, 2021, 06:26 AM
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Breaking Dawn Breaking Dawn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stahrgeyzer View Post
I feel very dissiated like I'm not here. Lot of parts speaking lately.
I understand this! I feel this very often!
__________________
"Every moment is a fresh beginning." (T. S. Eliot)

"Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines."(Robert H. Schiuller)

* * * * * *
Hugs from:
Fuzzybear, stahrgeyzer
Thanks for this!
stahrgeyzer
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