[stahrgeyzer]

Feeling unusual and dissociated as usual but fine. Going to my DBT therapist in awhile.

[Breaking Dawn]

Doing much better today than yesterday.

[stahrgeyzer]

Ok. Hanging in there. Learning about subsystems. Learning about alters who're not aware they're an alter. Alters who are living in the past at a hospital. There's an alter everyone is asking me to please save. He's just an infant suffering too much. So it's heartbreaking.

[Breaking Dawn]

I have been trying to figure out a way to end this nightmare experience so I can be the way I was before. I was doing so well & then this happened. I wish so much I could get back to where I was.

[Taylor27]

Today was a rough start but it got better as the day went on. I had trouble with my bank and my step Mom is very unsupportive. She really upset me and i still have to process it. It's hard to let it go. Day program helped me get my mind off of it and my husband is making a good supper tonight. I might call my therapist and let her know about this morning. She is very supportive.

[stahrgeyzer]

Overall fine today. Searching for a new DID psychologist. There're some scary weird things about him. I've told other people with DID. They say get away from him. Ugg, took so long to find him! Bought 2 books today on amazon. Can only read 1 at a time. Buying makes me feel better lol.

[Breaking Dawn]

I had fallen asleep & discovered when I woke up that I had eaten an avocado. The evidence was there but with no memory of having eaten it. So I think my suspicion of having a dissociative disorder is kind of trying to send me a message. I was told years ago that I was "dissociating". It was very sad & painful back then. I don't understand what is happening now. Is it because of the pandemic?

[Fuzzybear]

I feel sick. I don’t know why I am here

[Fuzzybear]

As I am a bear, maybe papa bear can put me to sleep. I hope so

[Taylor27]

Lazy day here another 10cm of snow fell last night making the roads very icy. Tomorrow i go to day program.

today, a member of my care team emailed me saying that she wanted contact with my mother to keep her updated on how I was doing.

I kindly informed her that this wouldn ot be possible, as she is not in the country, and we've not spoken in years because of abuse

she insisted more, and I got sort of nasty about it. well, it is a touchy subject and a part of my life that I see as over now

chapter abuse from my mother: closed

flashbacks this morning, and 2 panic attacks today

adding to the 2 I had on both wednesday and thursday

[Breaking Dawn]

I understand, @raging vortex. You're right. Hang in there. Hugs to you!

[Amyjay]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

today, a member of my care team emailed me saying that she wanted contact with my mother to keep her updated on how I was doing.

I kindly informed her that this wouldn ot be possible, as she is not in the country, and we've not spoken in years because of abuse

she insisted more, and I got sort of nasty about it. well, it is a touchy subject and a part of my life that I see as over now

chapter abuse from my mother: closed

flashbacks this morning, and 2 panic attacks today

adding to the 2 I had on both wednesday and thursday

Goodness no, what was she thinking? You're a fully grown adult, right? How bizarre. Good on you for telling her no.

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

today, a member of my care team emailed me saying that she wanted contact with my mother to keep her updated on how I was doing.

I kindly informed her that this wouldn ot be possible, as she is not in the country, and we've not spoken in years because of abuse

she insisted more, and I got sort of nasty about it. well, it is a touchy subject and a part of my life that I see as over now

chapter abuse from my mother: closed

flashbacks this morning, and 2 panic attacks today

adding to the 2 I had on both wednesday and thursday

Why are these people so incompetent? ugh. I do not get it

Good that you told her NO.

Originally Posted by Amyjay

Goodness no, what was she thinking? You're a fully grown adult, right? How bizarre. Good on you for telling her no.

people don't think, amyjay. people don't think and it's sad

Originally Posted by Breaking Dawn

I understand, @raging vortex. You're right. Hang in there. Hugs to you!

I wish their was a thread for people who hated our mothers/ family.

I'd use it a lot just to rant

my back still hurts.

locked this morning at like 4 A.M and it was agony

not as bad as it was (I couldn't even move), but it still hurts a dam lot.

I hate you fibro

[Fuzzybear]

Maybe some people do think... and are malicious.

I find it very hard to believe any ''professional'' could be THAT incompetent

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[Amyjay]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

I wish their was a thread for people who hated our mothers/ family.

I'd use it a lot just to rant

You could make one. I am sure there would be more than a couple of people who would welcome the opportunity to rant!

[Amyjay]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Maybe some people do think... and are malicious.

I find it very hard to believe any ''professional'' could be THAT incompetent

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

And yet, here we all are with our stories.

Originally Posted by Amyjay

You could make one. I am sure there would be more than a couple of people who would welcome the opportunity to rant!

I will!

not sure why I posted it really, guess seeking conformation it was a good idea but now I know it is..

[Fuzzybear]

currently feeling confused.

so a friend of mine (who I knew from church before covid), has decided that she's going to move away from the area, not far, but she wants a new start. she's told me not to worry, she'll still be their for me, and come visit me often

her close friend informed me yesterday that she's lying, and actually she's moving back to her home country since she's missing it

either way I feel depressed about it, plus: I don't really know what to believe at the moment. I would hope that my friend isn't moving back (since I'll never get to see her), but.... hmm.

causing me a lot of mixed emotions

[stahrgeyzer]

Feel like I'm in the twilight zone here at the long term airbnb where I'm living. Other two tenants are caughing like they're going to die. The guy in the room next here sounds like a demon is dying. He talks to himself, often in different voices. I'm the one who supposed to have DID. Another her as well? The caretaker is out right psychotic. I have way too many of my own problems for all of this.

On the bright side my DID therapy is starting to get better. Three of a zillion alters fronted for the therapist. They're afraid, but they did front. I asked therapist what S. said because I have no clue. Therapist said I don't need to know!

[Breaking Dawn]

Dear @stahrgeyzer, you are not alone. We look for the right place to be, & sometimes we find others who are worse off than we are. I remember you. You have very special qualities! Please don't let those others
whom you live with right now hurt your beautiful journey that means a lot to you! God bless you dear stahrgeyzer!