[SeptemberMorn]

A long-time friend of mine passed away last Thursday. He was only 56 yrs old. The cause of death was a massive stroke. He was skin and bones! Where did this come from? Why?? I can't believe it!




<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[Rapunzel]

{{{{{{{{{{{Tomi}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Sometimes there just doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason. I'm very sorry to hear about your friend.



<font color=orange>"Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm. - Winston Churchill "</font color=orange>

[Peanut61]

Oh, geez, ((((((((((Tomi)))))))))) [sad]

I'm sorry for your loss.

XOXO, Peanut

<font color=blue>HI FROM PEANUT</font color=blue>

[Beautiful_Pain]

{{{Sept}}} Sorry to hear about your friend



<font color=purple>Pain can indeed be a beautiful thing</font color=purple>

[SeptemberMorn]

Thanks, everybody. I feel like the wind not only got let out of sails, it feels like it got SNAPPED!

Jillers, I've told you about him before. Remember me asking you if anger is normal in the last stages of Aids? He didn't have aids, thank God, but that's the friend. I've known him every since John was a baby. In fact, I found a picture of him holding my Autumn.

It's so unbelievable! I've got so many questions for his mom, but I doubt that she even knows. He used to live in San Franciso but was visiting when he died in Palm Springs. It took five days for the authorities to find his mom. I don't understand it! He had friends in Palm Springs. Why did he die alone?

His mom told me they are planning a small family graveside service but my two boys that know he's passed want to go pay their respects. How do I tell her? Dang! I haven't even started to reel and my youngest is making demands of ME! I understand he's upset, but what can I do? It's not up to me! Neil refused to call him "John." He was always "Little Johnny" to Neil. John grew up to be bigger than Neil, but he was still "Little Johnny." (Sigh!) Somehow... life goes on.

I got my lone dove a partner today. I can still hear them flying and flapping around in the cage. I want to scream at them to "Stop! Neil is dead! Why aren't YOU??"




<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[PlanningtoLive]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tomi}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I'm really sorry about your loss. Most of the time I don't understand how things work in life - the things that seem fair don't happen and all the garbage comes piling in to make life miserable.

[heatherm]

((((((((((((((((Tomi))))))))))))))))))))

I am so sorry hun . Please stay strong through all of this. You helped me get through so much pain because of your strength.


Heather

[gloria]

If you are a person of faith, pray for acceptance ....
Love is a big thing ...

I read a book called "don't take away my grief" once when I lost a dear friend to a stroke too and it really helped.

gab

[SeptemberMorn]

Thanks, everybody. I'm not doing much better today. I feel anger today, guess it started last night.

It's not fair! He was younger than I! He was good! There's so many that are evil that hang around and hang around! He died before his mother who is very ill! It's not fair! He hadn't met my youngest grandson yet! Another "Little Johnny"!! He would have loved him! DAMN! DAMN! DAMN!




<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[SeptemberMorn]

Just got some MORE bad news!! My ex-mother-in-law passed away last Friday! Ok.... who's next? GAWD!!!!




<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[Fuzzybear]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tomi}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Love,
Fuzzy

[dexter]

So sorry SeptemberMorn

{{{{{{septmorn}}}}}}

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--http://www.idexter.com

[SeptemberMorn]

Thanks for the hugs, Fuzzy and Dave. If only I could really feel them. My heart feels physically heavy today. I don't like that feeling.




<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[Rapunzel]

{{{{{{{{{{{Tomi}}}}}}}}}}}}

<font color=orange>"Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm. - Winston Churchill "</font color=orange>

[PlanningtoLive]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tomi}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I am sorry for more pain and grief that is coming your way. It isn't right, and I want you to know that you are so loved, esp. by me.

xoxox

<font color=red>Don't you just hate it when life doesn't follow the manuals? - Author Unknown</font color=red>

[bptoo]

((((((((((Tomi))))))))))

I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. My deepest sympathies go out to you and to his family. It was good that you could be a part of each other's lives. Please take care.

Much love,
Greg



"Beauty is truth, truth is beauty - that is all you know on earth, and all you need to know"

[nightdream]

I'm sorry for you lost sweety!

(((((((((((((((SeptemberMorn))))))))))))))))))

with love
nightdream

[SeptemberMorn]

Thanks {{{{{{{{{{{{{{Mary Alice}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Greg}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} and {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Nightdream}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

It's not getting any better. My youngest came over last night to finish the glass wall that's going to be the base for our breakfast bar. His wife insisted on coming too with their two kids and an extra girl that just got custody of. Would you believe the Wicked ***** of the West would not come in or let the kids come in?? She and the kids sat out there for a couple of hours and refused to let the babies come in. Autumn was crying! I could hear her! Then Austin started crying. Jerry went out there with a bowl of fresh strawberries, Autumn's favorite, but she refused them. She wanted me to feed them to her! Either that or nothing. Her mother wouldn't let her come in.

That was the straw that broke the camel's back. I had to go in the back room and have my good cry. She's got us all by the short hairs!! What I'm thinking of doing is finding a Family Mediator and see what I can set up there. She's being close-minded, irrational and EVIL!

Needless to say, everything came crashing down on me last night. We expected my ex MIL to pass soon, but not Neil. "Neil can't be dead!!!" keeps going through my head. What's more, his mother isn't answering her email, and I understand, but I'm not getting any answers, either.

I'm going back into my hole...




<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[Fuzzybear]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Tomi}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

With big bearhugs and much love,
Fuzzy

[Peanut61]

((((((((((((((((((((Tomi))))))))))))))))))))))...

About Neil - I completely understand about the "He can't be dead", stunned feeling that you are experiencing, and I know you know that the types of losses that you are having now bring up the old ones too.

Time and patience with yourself is key; I wish so much that your DIL had a level of compassion/empathy at a time like this. Chances are that life will be teaching her some rather harsh lessons in the future...

Am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. As ever, XOXO, Jillers

<font color=blue>HI FROM PEANUT</font color=blue>

[nightdream]

((((((((((((((((SeptemberMorn)))))))))))))))))

I understand what you mean and how you feel. My sister was also cruel to me just the day after my FIL died.

I am so sorry sweety! I'm keeping you in my heart!

with love
nightdream

[wisewoman]

Oh I am so sorry. I hope your kids are doing well with this, as well as they can be. Peace to you. The shock is hard, the fog will lift.

[SeptemberMorn]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Fuzzy}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} LOVE them bearhugs and the love that goes with them. Thanks, Sweety.




<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[SeptemberMorn]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Jillers}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} It's amazing the strength I feel in your posts. Thank you so much for following up. I know you understand what I'm going through. Just seeing Neil's name in print sets me back a bit. It's still so unbelievable! Not MY Neil! :'(




<font color=blue>"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt" --Shakespeare</font color=blue>

[dexter]

I almost can't believe this. What does she think about the kids crying??? Why would she bring them there, to torture them?

I am definitely for the idea of a family mediator. I know this is very hard for you but it is cruel to the kids too... any mediator would act on the benefit of the kids and hopefully help work something out that they can see you.

This must be the worst of all possible times to have her abusing you like this.

Good thing I wasn't there... I would have marched out there and dragged her out of the car by her hair.... without opening the car door first! I'd pull her out through the keyhole! Then bring the kids in to you and tell your son to make sure that they STAY there with you, with no guilt and no pressure, while he finishes his work.

You should get one of those collars for her where when she barks, she gets a mild electric jolt. Bet the kids would have fun setting that off!

Best wishes for this and getting a resolution. I think you are right to fight this. I know you will be able to find a way to resolve this without dragging the children down... it can be done and you have enough love for them to find a way to do it.



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--http://www.idexter.com