cancer and family history

Yea odd face to make.........................................

.What I had been thinking was the chemo making her sleep all the time has actually been a fifth of vodka per day. ........................................................

Now WTF?????? She is steadily losing weight while taking steroids to do the opposite..............

. Now I have to decide if I get ill with her and make her eat ....... I could just keep making instant potatoes 5 times a day............... And say when your done with that then you get icecream and cookies... ............

Or let the Doctors admit her and feed her through a tube up her nose. ......................................

.I understand food is bland as heck to her...... And whatever is going on in her mind Cannot be easy.........

.Now to figure out that I have alot of empty bottles of vodka stashed under the sink........................ ..........

> I could say what is this? Or ignore it and know that the excuse/argument>>???.....................Will most definately be,,,,,,, It is her life !! And that I will Have to except.....For that is the truth.

.Just wish I could fix SOMETHING......................................sux.

i would ask her if she is drinking the vodka..are you postive she is drinking it? I dont know...maybe there is an explaniation for the empty bottles....if you know she is drinking it you need to confront her about her problem...she is probably using it because she cannot handle the pressure of having cancer.....get her to go to AA meetings...offer to go with her....as for food.....have you though about ensure? Ask her if she likes milkshakes..get her chocolate and vanilla and strawberry....im thinking the chemo is making her nasceous and not want to eat...turning her stomach...and even when she does feel better she is so used to feeling sick and not wanting to eat it hurts her stomach to eat cuz its not used to it anymore....offer to make her whatever she wants......sometimes what we do in the nursing home is use heavy spices...like Mrs. Dash.....to potatoes...or put sugar in something....because the elderly cant taste a whole lot....they love sugar because its the last tastebud to go...thats the only thing they really can taste other than Mrs. Dash....its strong...keep snacks....not large meals....lots of popcorn or graham crackers or saltines my aunt loved sweet potatoes when she was having cancer..they were sweet and filling and with some butter its something nice and hot to eat without having a large meal to make you not want to eat.....things she can nibble on all day.....when she wants....things that will help her gain weight.....get her into activites.....something not stressful or physically demanding...but she can crochet or read.....perhaps take her for small walks......i would definitly bring it up to her doctor.....explain your worries to both of them...dont hide your feelings....dont ignore it...its a sign she needs help...and fast.....you cannot do it alone....you need to get some help ....if you let it go she will sink farther down and think she can get away with it......she will keep hurting herself because she cant take the idea of having cancer...remember she has seen her mom and her family members with cancer...she doesnt want that to happen to her......try not to keep any alcohol in the house....keep her occupied .....and tell her youd feel better if she got some help with that ...i know there are cancer support groups...perhaps get her to go to them.....take her shopping offer to sit through her favorite movies...i hope i sorta helped good luck ok? Keep us posted

Cool Inny >>>>> Yea ensure and boost and ice cream always I make meals with extra spices and sweet tea. I love sweet potatoes brown sugar and marhmellows . She not big on sweets . Got lots of snacks ... Nabs and bar b qued pork rinds... Sunflower seeds M & M 's,,, As far as getting out she will take a 5 min. trip and be gone 2 hours I D K ?,,,, Support group peeps call 3 times a week. And actually I do KNow she is Drinking . And all family that had cancer are dead now .

. I hear what you are telling me Inny.,,,,,,,,But I have always been ,,,unless you have or are wearing those shoes ,,,,,,, You have to listen more closely and pick your battles if you want to win the war.

(((wmd)))

((((((((((wmd))))))))))) milkshakes always helps. whatever works for her would be helpful, even if it's only ice cream (i think - but, definitely get shakes with all the necessary nutrients that she needs). i'm hoping she'll be to handle those. as for all those vodkas, i don't know if the cancer and other things are getting to her. praying for you both.

>>>>>>>>>>.T / Y Clyde.

Yea Wings I make milk shakes I end up drinking them I have gained at least 8 lbs that she should have gained .

That was beautifully written. You know I am here for you! I really hope g/f makes it to this place to find the support waiting here for her. I can say I feel bad about what you are both going through, I can say how sad it is. But the words from one individual can not comfort like the support she will receive here. No matter who you are and no matter how many you have around you, illness can be lonely. Added to her love at home the support here will make her feel encircled with ears to listen, and lots of arms to give big hugs. My Best Thoughs are with you both. Maryl

Hey Curley Thank you My Bud. I wish she knew how to log on and have own name But same house and addy Is not allowed............... Tried it and was shut down as to one Oh well.

this may sound really stupid......but there is this new book out......and i personally love it...even though i do not have cancer it runs in my family and it makes me feel better...its called Crazy Sexy Cancer...and its this girl who wrote it and she has a rare cancer and was told she doesnt have much to longer...she began this whole new health thing with yoga and the whole works.and because of all this she ends up actually getting better than before and i think she is in remission...she wrote a book and gets the readers involved...its like a diary gone public....its becoming very popular actually. The have their own online stores...they made a film.....which was just as good....i dont know....just a random thought that may help......

i want you to know i really feel for you and her. Its hard road....i hope you know im just posting here to try and help...or give suggestions....i understand the pain......with my aunts and uncles and cousins......who knows maybe me someday......i just want you to know i think you are very brave and i think she is very brave......i really respect you and your actions, for sticking with her and by her and for helping her......

deleted .....stupid computer...

,,,,,,,. Well a neighbor friend burned off a c/d of western and eastern philosophies meet and find ( I hope ) concurrence............................. Worth a shot.

.But actually I am going to stop her from lieing ' bout everything k with family and friends............. I am going to try to do a planned intervention of hope and care and on top of that I am going to say " By the way Docs she is self destucting with no reason to actually care and so if you's do show IT " !!!!

. I'll see.. Sorry ,,,, I am of Care ,,, Just right now I see No care self like as she should exibit ..

I had been saying for 4 days I was going to go with her to talk to Docs myself as to concerns.........

. I think I learned something I did not expect. Being the closest peep To Donna ,,,, I have a daily watching thing.

.Amazing Donna told her Docs For the First time that she was not happy and drinking way to much ..

.I have went the route so far as watcher.. Not Involver.... But what I learned ,, was Donna told the way it is for we have no secrets and I was in the room when Main Doc and P a were talking to her. And she said she needed help I only had to re-inforce with nods and firm handshakes and gentle to all others that are involved in this thing. It is not so quietly looked at " cancer " but it is wow how this community of care givers give ,, too cancer strikin peeps and the little things you may not see ,,, but feel and know.

.They prescribe lexapro and megace For the dep land and weight loss concerns.

Well so much as 1 step forward Now with stuff to make appetite come back ......No good ,,,,,,, In 3 days she has eaten a cup of rice . And tonight I made some Healthy Choice Soups ,,,, When I woke her to eat it was "Let me sleep " Best I start talking about the 27 years we have known each other and the good and bad times we have faced <<<<< ,,, And start saying good bye. ( Time to rattle the cage ) See if I maybe can wake the survivor that is still breathing... Or take her to the beach and then the mountains ,,,and say We won't see 28 years together and you may go to sleep ,,,, ((((((( My Best Friend )))))))) I truly truly do LOVE you >>>> P E A C E My Love <<<<<

(wmd)))

If you get snowed in ,,, Find me ,,, I'll be that somewhat odd shaped snowbank at the end of the driveway.

.(((((((( Muffy )))))))))

((((((((((((((WMD))))))))))))))))

no more talk about snowbanks. if it snows I am going to fly down there and unbury you. no waiting for the spring thaw

Well Donnas' Dad came by this morning to bring Her some Gifts..

I walked him out and We discussed some things and As well as I he is concerned about the rapid weight loss, Talked about her mothers' battle and how she had such a positive attitude and how Donna slips into dep land and .....We both agree that the Docs should admit her and tube feed her while she finishes these last 2 treatments.

And it was kinda refreshing to see the Old Guy almost shed a tear,,,,,But He sucked it up.... And I did too>> as he got in His truck and was off to One of Donnas' cousins house for Christmas dinner.

Here ,, I just put dinner in the oven and maybe I can make some tempting smells waft from that kitchen and at least get her to ,,,try and want a little something... P E A C E .

**BIG SQUISHY KIND HUGS TO CORKY MY BABY BOY*
dont worry sonny, im always here ok? i know ive been a bit of a twit lately. but im always here to listen and to talk and everything. i know its real hard to be a rock for something like that, so let me be a rock with u, for when you crumble a little ok? dont deny when u feel sad. tell us u feel sad, tell us all about it. im always here and always ready to listen. i love u lots.
dot

>>>.((((((((((( S E L F Y )))))))))))).<<< You Already know that goes BOTH Ways..... Anytime I be there for YOU TOO !! ........ Beatles Song * Yesterday * *

((((((wmd)))))) i'm here............. keep posting. you're not alone because we're all here for you......

(((((((((((((((((((W I N G S )))))))))))))))))))))))

I Miss ya in Chat >>>>> I have been a hard pill to swallow lately,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,My own fault though.

( sssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhh ) * wish I could hide this reply * i m i g h t be B l e s s e d ?

... Well I can Post a good Day Finally.

Donnas' Dad picked her up and took her for a 6 hr. Drip.

Niether one of them asked for a Dif Food Enticing med ....

I went and sat with Dad peep and [ even though we never speak ] ,,,,,We spoke in concert.

So after we spoke of social security for her ,,, and eligability for food stamps / already she has medicade. And The Care and concern >>>>>> The old Guy opened up to me.>>>???? Real Shock !!

As I got up and had a mission as to med check ,,,,, I Actually felt no prob with patting Donnas' Dads shoulder ,,, and Saying " Take Care ".

About 8 mins, later ,,,, I walked up to Donna ( laying in a lane recliner type chair ) As she had been for 5 hrs. ,,, Dad was there and I handed Donna a R x For marinol..

[ I saw Doc peep And said the magace is not working ,,,, Let's try Marinol ]

So to make a long story short.................She took This pill and she was >>>>>>>>>>>>. LOL.

She ate like ,,, eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrmmmmmmmm????Munchies ???

Yea ,, To See Her Eat >>> I be going Like THIS >>>>

(((((((((((wm and Donna)))))))))))))

This is SUCH good news!!!! I'm sooooooo happy for you all (dad inc)))



Love Jin xxxxxx

Yeah, that is very good news!!!!!!!!!