Hoarding

I'm wondering if anyone else has hoarding tendencies. I only have noticed mine since I first saw a hoarding show last year. My place isn't the worst, but it definitely needs clearing out.

It's a long story but I never unpacked when I moved into my current apartment. As a result I still have packing cartons everywhere and with no furniture I have piled items on top of them. It isn't so bad that it couldn't be cleared out in a couple of days but it is bothering me terribly. I can't clean properly, and I can't walk around normally. It's really getting me down. Anyone else in a similar boat?

I'm saving money and I hope to use some of it to hire movers to get the stuff out of here. And organization solutions. And furniture!

do you miss the stuff in the boxes? are you surviving without it? can you just throw away a box a week? or donate them?

I lived with two hoarders, not as bad as on the show, but bad so I worry how much was me. I have my clutter because I live in a small apt. I watch hoarders cause it encourages me to clean my space. I go on sprees where I just throw away or donate everything I haven't used for awhile.

Thank you for your reply, kaliope! Yes, I do miss a lot of it. But other stuff is just computer stuff, and old clothes I can probably never wear again, kitchen supplies I've done without for 4 years, etc. So I think I could get rid of a lot.

I also am inspired by the shows. The problem is my back is really bad so I can't stand up to fill garbage bags or boxes with stuff to throw out. I need help from an organizer, etc.

I'm a major hoarder. It's hard-wired into my brain. Even as a small child I hoarded things and I still have a lot of said things. Hoarding is actually what finally sent me to get serious psychiatric help instead of just anti-depressants & tranquilizers from my family doctor. It got so bad that something just had to be done about it.

My emotional state, however dire, is something that didn't have such a physical impact on those around me, and that allowed me to "get away with" not addressing my mental health problems. But as the years went by, the objects kept piling up. I live with my mother, who is also a hoarder, although she denies it. (Her hoarding is quite mild in comparison, so I try not to give her much grief.)

It's not as bad here as I've seen on TV shows about hoarding, but I can't help but look around and think, "God I have SO MUCH STUFF!" And it's difficult to let go of any of that stuff, no matter how trivial it seems. "Hoarders" and other TV shows helped my mother understand the condition a bit better. (It's probably also why she doesn't consider herself one, since those cases are extreme.)

After trying all sorts of anti-depressants for over a decade, I found one that actually works on my need to keep things. It's sort of an off-switch. Sort of: it hasn't completely shut down the urge; it's more like it lowered the volume. The rest I have to do myself, which means clearing the clutter, throwing things away.

But it's been an awesome breakthrough all around. Things like receipts had sentimental value. Everything was "evidence" — proof of an emotion, action or event, no matter how large or small in scale — to be kept and treasured.

Now I'm not going to lie to you. Right next to me on this couch is a pile of items comprised of clutter and what I call "overspill". The overspill is stuff that should be in my bedroom but isn't because I hoarded my way right out of that room.

That's the place that really needs to get cleared out. I haven't had the stomach to go through 98% of what's in my bedroom due to the emotions it will inevitably bring up. (I sleep in another room now.) There are stacks and piles all over my bedroom. Lots of clothes, too.
With this medication and therapy, at some point, I'm going to be able to throw away, donate and organize what's in there and finally get my bedroom back.

That's one of my long-term goals: sleeping in my own bedroom!

So, does anyone have hoarding tendencies? I most certainly do. And it's a battle.

Thank you for your reply, angelene! Yes, I keep everything too if I'm not paying attention. Receipts, wrappers, bags, boxes, packaging. It's pretty bad. I always think, what if I have to exchange or return it? But I never do and stuff just piles right up.

I too am not as bad as the programs but I definitely have the tendencies and I now am a lot more aware. I'm going to work on throwing out as much as I can here. I want it all done yesterday but in truth I have no idea when it will be cleared out in here.

I overbuy, too. Too many clothes, too many e cigarettes, no matter what I'm buying I buy too much unless I'm really focused. I'm a lot more aware now than I used to be though. That's good at least and especially if I can quit buying things.

The urge to buy can be overwhelming. I'm trying my best to stay away from home shopping channels because over the past year, I somehow got addicted to them and bought a lot of items. Some needed and useful, others just adding to my "collection."

Oh yeah, home shopping channels are deadly. I have to stay away because they can sell me anything if I'm in the mood to buy.

I am definitely a hoarder. I have collected so much stuff. I can't seem to par t with my stuff. My home is very cluttered and I live in an apartment. I've even been in trouble once. Cleaning is hard.

I did the hoarding show in 2010. Unfortunately the professional organizer they assigned to help me was an ineffective imbecile.

I've been thinking of hiring an organizer to help me sort through stuff and tell me if any of it can be kept conveniently. But I imagine they cost a fortune to hire.

I need more shelving and I need basic furniture. And movers to take the cartons out.

I don't have the funds to hire an organizer, otherwise I would have. Angelique67, Do you have family or friends that can be impartial enough to help out?

I have family but I have trouble trusting their judgement when it comes to what to keep and what has got to go...

Well that sucks! If you don't mind, could you share a little more about that experience?

I have a friend (no family in this state) but he's very busy. I want to do this asap because the lack of adequate floor space is driving me crazy and the way this place looks. Why don't you trust your family's judgment? I'm not sure who I'd trust either. Maybe my friend, although he wouldn't understand about makeup and stuff like that. Plus he wouldn't see a problem with expired food...

It's tough! I know I can't do it alone but I worry that family, as understanding as they are, would put too much pressure on me to get rid of things that I think are completely acceptable to file in the "keep" category... I also have a very firm place to start picked out for several reasons but they're pushing to start elsewhere in the room.

Maybe your friend can help just in specific spots?

I'd accept help in any spot really because it's so hard to do it alone. But he'd be OK with me keeping what I want even if he got exasperated. I just don't know when he'll ever have time. That's why I want to hire an organizer.

I feel like I am in about the same boat as you guys I struggle really badly with OCD like tendancies...and I have ADD.

so event though I obesse over things I can't get it to the point I want things to be, my lack of an income makes thing even harder for me to deal with.....I have since tried to stop buying things I might just simply want...and buy thngs I need like storage containers...I mean how am I going to move out of my mom's place if I have hardly no way of putting up the things I already have. And a lot of the storage I already use is my mother's.

that and the fact I want all of this but have no real way of getting it is driving me nuts. I mean it has just become more and more obvious that I am going to always have struggles with having a job. at least a full time one...which is why i am applying for disability right now. but realizing how much these small problems I have effect me and make me feels so horrible some days is just horrid....

I hate, hate dealing with these things all of the time...I want my life to feel like more then this I want better. But some days I just seriously can not even tell how i am going to get to the point I want to be at.

I'm feeling completely hopeless about it all today. Woke up feeling not too good and I just can't seem to do what I have to do. Very sad and down today.

And I'm looking around me and it's like someone else's place - I never lived like this before the 10 moves! Oh my God. I never lived like this. I'm so depressed today I don't know what to do.

It can be soooo overwhelming! When I go into my bedroom, I look around and think, "How did this happen?" But I know how it happened. Instead of fretting about it, I have to do something small yet significant: throw something away. Even if it's just old lipstick or mascara, every little item that goes bye-bye is a small victory!

But when I'm having a bad day, the little victories don't bring me a useful amount of joy...

You're right. I can see things I could throw away but there are things on top of them that I'll have to take time to rebalance. So it doesn't fall all over the place. The problem is the cartons I have to get out of here, and not having enough shelving or a dresser.

I have a carton somewhere of lipsticks that would be over 20 years old now. Some of them over 30 years old!

I know what you mean. There is a ton of stuff that could be gotten rid of right now but I can't get to it without going through other stuff and/or possibly knocking things over! I frequently wish I had telekinesis.

Basically the organizer seemed to think her goal was to have the clutter out of sight for the reveal with TLC. She kept putting stuff in my oven and I kept telling her not to. She stuffed things in plastic bags and threw them in my walk in closet with no organization. When she picked up my cat bed I told her it had been washed and was clean and I thought she would put it back later but I have not seen it since. The same with rugs in my living room; I have had maids take the rugs outside to shake the dirt off and return them but she took the rugs to... I have no idea whatsoever what she did with my rugs. They were in good shape and matched my tile.

The oddest thing that she 'organized' we found a couple years after the show. She had placed the guitar from the video game Guitar Hero inside my dining room closet which she then blocked off with cardboard boxes filled with whatever she couldn't fit in my walk in closet.

Yes, that makes great sense. Put a video game guitar in the dining room closet. Awesome organization. NOT!

There was more stuff she screwed up but you get the idea. I was accepting that I would be humiliated in front of thousands of people on TV but I thought getting the help would make it worth it. She was a local 'organizer' who did estate sales mostly and had done some office organizing a bit but she was dumb as h---.

That doesn't sound helpful. Maybe she panicked? How much work on your own did you do?

No she didn't panic. She was here for six weeks from the time we started until the time we finished.

TLC also provided a T just to help sort out any problems I might have about letting stuff go. I told him she was not listening to me and was bulldozing through the house without regard to what I wanted. He talked to her and after that she sat down for a half hour and she asked what I imagined in each of the rooms. I thought we were getting somewhere but as soon as the talk finished she went back to doing things her way.

I think she thought that I was not capable of making decisions and needed her to be my mommy or something.

I have a very wide hallway and at one end we have a chest. The organizer decided to move the chest to the entry room for some reason. I don't know why. She didn't ask, she just moved it and she damaged one of the feet in the process. I was really mad. That chest had been in the hallway for 23 years and that is where I wanted it so my son and I moved it back there the same day she moved it out of the hallway.

I can't find some of my things I want. For example, I don't think she knew how to cook much. I have a meat thermometer and I h̶a̶v̶e̶ had a candy thermometer. They have totally different uses. I ALWAYS kept the candy thermometer in the drawer below the silverware. After she organized my house it was gone. I can't make fudge without it. I have a $300 large heavy duty Kitchen Aid mixer and I also h̶a̶v̶e̶ had a $20 hand held mixer. Different mixers for different jobs. I also always kept the hand held in the same drawer for years. After the organizer - the small mixer is gone as well as some other things like my electric knife. I h̶a̶v̶e̶ had a recipe book that held 3X5 cards in it with hand written recipes; my favorite recipes. It is presumably somewhere in a cardboard box or closet. I am mad. I want to make some of those things and that is the only place I kept those recipes. Nope, I really don't think she cooks.

I could go on. My son has some missing items too. We both regret doing the show but we thought we would get help that would make things better. Indeed the clutter is less but we don't know where a lot of our stuff is post-organizer.

Edit to add: You asked how much work I did. My son and I worked in our bedrooms alone. We helped pick up obvious trash and discard it and we helped with some of the cleaning like washing dishes. I asked the organizer to not touch any of my model horses because she would not know the difference between a $40 horse and a $2500 horse so I did all the sorting, moving and packing of the model horses.

I'd be afraid of that, even though most of my things are already in cartons away from my reach or apartment. Sorry to hear about your missing/damaged belongings. I'm trying to think if I saw your episode but I have no idea. Most of the Hoarding eps end well, whereas the Hoarders eps don't always end so well. I've considered nominating myself for a program just to get some help but I don't think I could do it. I admire your courage!