Outgrown PC?

Maybe I'm tired, I have just finished a 26 hour shift at work and the first thing I do when I get home is come here to PC. PC is my home page. I have been here many years now and I have the most posts out of all members. Doesn't mean that I have said anything interesting during my time here, just posted to most anything and everything.

I guess when I first came here PC was the greatest support that I needed at the time and then gradually over time I didn't really need a lot of support and went mad in supporting other people.

But what now? Yes I still log on and PC will be on my laptop screen all day long on my day off from work but I'm not getting (or needing) the support. I don't feel I really need support now. Not sure anyone wants to listen to my advice anymore. God, it's that flippin' horse talking again.

I'm rambling I know, just, I guess I don't get that buzz I used to get when I used to spend my whole life here at PC. I hope I don't sound ungrateful, I am truly grateful, I'm just not sure why I come here anymore and yet it would break my heart if I didn't.

Disillusioned with life.

Take a break from PC for awhile and see how it goes. Change your homepage to google or something and see what happens. Sometimes we just need a change of pace.

I agree with Farmergirl. Maybe you just need to move away from home.

You've spent so long caring about this community...maybe it's time to move to a new community...of sorts. It's okay to step away. We know you care. You don't have to come every day or every week. It's okay to move on. Moving on and moving forward doesn't mean you can't come back into PC Town for a visit.

You're Pegs!! You'll always be welcome here...whether you're needing support, giving support, or just stopping in to say "Howdy".

It's okay!!

((((pegasus))))

Awww----hon. We do not think you are ungrateful or anything. I know for me I love to read what you write and you always have been right there even with a hug meant more than you know.

If taking a break is what you need then I think you should do what is best for you. We will always need our horse friend, and she will always mean something to those within dps. We love you.

When we are hurting and we need a hug or sitting in the garden, you always come and we know we are safer. We thank you for that. Many times those within do not know to thank others for answering but I notice and it means more than you will ever know. Many times it gets us through the night. So thank you.

We are here all the time many times through the night. When something is wrong or we feel lost or anything we are right here. Many times supporting others to get out of ourselves but always here. When I get up in the morning after getting to bed I come to PC first thing. When I wake up in the middle of the night on the nights I do fall asleep, I come to PC first. SO I do understand how that is.

Please do for you what is best for you but please know that you are appreciated and what you say has meaning to us. We love you pegasus, always. Sending you gentle hugs and loving thoughts. Always.

dps

(((Peg)))

Your words are so encouraging to me!!! PC is very important to me (sometimes more....sometimes less). It's comforting to know that if you need to take a break, you can come back and reconnect with old friends and make new friends. More comforting to know that you can reach the point of wellness that you have!

Peg...you have done so much here!! It just simply makes me smile to think that you are well, whole and happy!! You go girl!!!!!

Much love to you Peg!

Susan

You have to do what is best for you Peg, and if that means taking a break - then by all means take a break. Having you here occasionally is better than never having you here.

But speaking from a selfish personal viewpoint, I hope you're just fatigued.

slow

Good luck with whatever you choose to do, pegasus.

I only have been here a few months and think I have already over-stayed my welcome.

Be well.

(((BFF!))) Yep, I hear ya! I know part of it IS being tired right now ... but also that as time moves on, so do we.

PC isn't what it used to be ... but how could it be? The small, close-knit group (when 8 in chat was crowded) that could quickly ward off trolls is long gone...when DocJohn was around with support, and for a bit later on was around all the time it seemed. The times when there was always someone around who totally understood and gave support for many of us "old timers" became few and farther between. So many have progressively healed-and that's a good thing-and have filled their lives with things other than PC. Newcomers don't know the oldtimers very well (if at all). Many of the older members who come and go, checking in, just aren't welcomed perhaps because they aren't known and that basic anxiety of "the unknown" kicks into gear. Plus, when the former members come back, well, they also don't really know anyone new.

I think it's a mixture of the growth of PC, and y(our) own growth.
I think what we miss is the comraderie we had right then, at that time (but surely none of us would wish the old issues and problems back).

As with all things in life, change happens and needs to be accommodated. I learned a very long time ago not to close any door that didn't have to be shut until it had to be. Leave the PC door open for your friends here, and take a break. Not "needing" PC is a good thing. Having PC to come home to is a good thing, too.

Yeah. sigh. Back when my being the "first" Legendary Wise Elder (after our beloved admin Ozzie left) was kewl... and you with 50,000 posts in a zillion well-played games too (awarded with a padded chat room) ... all gone? Life should stay so simple!

((( Pegasus )))

I am certainly far from being an 'old-timer' here but I think I understand the sentiment to a certain degree- like any community, time comes and goes here, and people change, faces change, everything changes. Sometimes I wish PC was a time capsule in that changing world, but it's not. I know I find it difficult to sometimes jump into changing waters- and when I do, I fear feeling unwanted, ungrateful, rude or whiny.

I'm sure I don't only speak for myself when I say you're a valued member here and that your advice and presence is more than welcome. When I see you reply to a thread of mine, I'm happy- because I know you're a helpful and thoughtful person who puts effort into what they write. Look at the Peggers subforum you've created- look at the people you've helped in there. Any one of those people would vouch for the positive impact you've had on this community, I'm sure.

Take good care.

Pegasus, I think that it is positive that you no longer 'need' PC. That shows growth. Wouldn't it be nice if we could all someday say we no longer need PC?

What now? I don't know. In time you will decide.

Your advice valued. Sounds like you are tired. I do agree about changing your homepage. Take break. Every so often I take a break from things and it helps.

Whoa, Pegus! I've just arrived, a newbie. Shortly after I got here you were embroiled in a discussion re people coming and going, and felt those that left couldn't sign back in, some people were getting hurt. It was a lively exchange. But in the end you asked, "does anyone else want to kick me:" To me, that felt painful. Not many could take that heavy a backlash, and not lick their wounds. I admired you as a leader; one who took chances and put the hard questions out there. Think of that post, think of the empathy you were feeling to venture out into PC. Were you battle-beat? Knock the wind out your sails? Battle weary? I'm thinking of myself when I ask...I couldn't take it. Wow! But you came back and I saw you smiling, sparring and working your big heart out, helping, as usual.

Please, rest, rest, rest then come back slowly. You have such zest, how could you not feel tired? Put PC in a visitor mode, you've been a leader, and an effective one! Help PC along in it's burgeoning growth. You are needed, you can pick a few to help, and bounce out-do your thing and bounce in again. See if you can get that "bounce" back and get the "trudge" out of the way! Do you hear me pleading, for me & others?--

I pretty much agree with everybody. We have been here the same amount of years and I have often gone into a migration for a period of time. It has helped me refocus and regroup. This place has become enormous and I think it is pretty normal now to feel left out of the loop once in a while (I mean that about me, not about you).
I am very fond of you Pegasus and you are a fantastic gaming companion, so for selfish reasons, I hope this passes. But nurture your fatigue and take care of yourself first.

Pegasus, I dont feel adequate to post here but I am anyway.

Dont know really what to say except observances really. You have been dealing with so much uncertainty in your real life with your career, and the job you do is not a job it is a vocation. I did something similar to it for all of one day a while back and I couldnt imagine dealing or managing with the stress and challenges that your daily career throws at you. It is extremely demanding emotionally, spiritually and physically.

You are at a bit of a crossroads it would appear and need to grasp onto some balance somewhere. PC does not seem to be compensating at the moment and it would seem this is the first time you have been confronted with this feeling? I dont know, just gasping at straws here and I am no psychologist.

You are very sage and august. You may need to retreat and rest a while. There is no shame or doubt in that. You have professed to so many about self care, now it would appear is the time do so yourself.

I personally hate change and not having you about would be a great change. I dont know you at all, I know of you and your presence here only and it is has always been a sanctuary in the storm.

But I know I have had to withdraw for a while for various reasons and it has been good for me to do so.

Do what is right for you and please leave it open that you can come back when you feel the need to do so. We are all welcome here for whatever reason that is. Some fo us dont click with each other, some are more prominent that others, some mouth off and like me can be inappropriate at times, others offer great advice and counsel, more offer suppport and reason to those of us gasping for air.

We are all on a journey, yours is that bit more progressed that many here, you are the wisest ever and most posted. But in the background there are others coming up behind you and will also post many fold. Remember that the beauty of the journey that this life is, is not the destination but the journey itself. I think and hope that maybe you have come to take a detour on this journey and want a break and to sightsee elsewhere for a while and when its right for you will pop back on the train that we are all on.

Maybe I should pick a fight with you and pique your interest so you would stay?

Or maybe that would be just exactly the wrong thing to do?

Thank you friends, I appreciate all the replies.

Last night I came home after two 8 hour shifts back to back with a sleep-in inbetween. (There really is no sleep when you do a sleep-in!)

Trying to find some balance yes, and coming here to PC out of duty rather than need. For those that think I'm going to leave - you won't get rid of me that easily!

But I will take all your advice and take a break and rest.

((((((((((((Peagsus))))))))))))))))

I've only been here for two years, but sometimes I get to feeling burned out and I need a break, it's okay to take a break from time to time, sometimes we all just need a rest, it doesn't mean we don't care or anything it just means we have to practice self care and take a good deep breathe

God, I like that "flippin' horse"!

Pegasus, you are a wise and wonderful member of PC. I hope you find what you need and enjoy your rest.

Indeed, PC can be a home away from home, but it can also sometimes be a stress, especially when it seems nothing we say or do is right, or acknowledged, or some such. Heck, even I've felt that way here sometimes, and when I do, I take a mini-break of my own.

Certainly we're not where we were 9 years ago when this community started -- nor should or could we be. We have to grow, we have to reach new people, because that is core to our mission. What a boring place this would be if nobody new ever joined us!

But there's a balance to try and reach for -- there always is. Here, in life, you name it. I'm not sure we'll ever find that "perfect" balance (or if such a thing exists), but we should all try in our own personal lives to find the things and places that fit into our needs and wants right now. And recognize it when it changes, and allow ourselves to change along with it.

PC is meant to be a safe place to express your emotional needs on the road to recovery. And although we acknowledge long-time members with badges and what-not, there's absolutely nothing wrong with being here for a few months or a year and then finding you're ready to move on. And of course if you chose to do so, the door is always open, the light is always on, and old members are always welcomed back!

Best,
DocJohn

Pegs,

I know what you are going through. I have been here for over 5 years. Started off slow as I was in the middle of the trauma with my Mother & PC got me through that & then PC traveled with me through my move here to KY & through all the heart aches & thrills that I have gone through here. I thought that I would be able to take on a little more here & then when spring hit & I found that my life really didn't allow me the time for that, I found myself away from here for 2 weeks before I realized that my life was just too busy for anything but checking in once in awhile.

It's a hard feeling to realize that there is more to life than the PC we have been living at for so many years, but this is also a good thing. Just because that happens doesn't mean that we can't be here when we have the time & the mental ability to post support or even when we might need some support getting through some of the little issues that come along.

We have to understand that life is never stationary & we have to analyze our own situations & do what is best for us. I can't imagine how psychologists go day in & day out helping people & trying to say the right thing so that they don't do any harm......it's stressful & when we try to do that even here 24 hours a day, it's a stressful situation also......sometimes we come to a place where there is a void & nothing seems to come out. That seems to happen mostly when so many other things in our life are coming at us all at the same time & those people in our real life are in need of the energy that we have.

PC isn't an all or nothing site. There is nothing wrong with finding yourself gone for awhile because life is taking all your energy. Coming back when you feel you have the time & energy is better than trying to force energy to happen when you don't have it left from what life is requiring.

You are cared about here. It isn't about how many posts you have. You can come back less often & provide the support you are able to at that time & it will continue to be appreciated. It's important to be able to come & go as you need to as your life changes, everything changes & there is nothing wrong with change.....change is good. I have always found that getting stuck in a rut is much of a worse thing than change ever has been & is much less healthy.

Don't worry about when or where you are able to be here, just go with the flow & let your flying horse take you where his wings fly. Feel the freedom of flight. God will guide those wings to land where they are needed.

Take care of yourself & let go of your worries. With my years of life, I have found that God takes care of my worries no matter how I want things to turn out.....its been a long learning process but a good one.

I am only able to come here once in awhile now. A rainy day when I'm not out mowing my acres of grass, painting my house, working with the 4-H kids on the trail riding, working on my Bible study, cleaning up after my 6 dogs, & am not dealing with a brain that doesn't want to think or worry about anything, or just taking off & trail riding myself just to chill out.

I know you will find the right combination in your life that you will become comfortable with....just let life happen for awhile & feel your freedom & I am sure you will find much fulfillment.

Take care, we will always be a part of PC even when we aren't here daily or even weekly at times. Your posts will still have the valuable content when you post them no matter how often you are here.

Enjoy some time for yourself & your family & dealing with the interview process for your permanent position....you have a lot going on to keep your mind busy & that is very ok.

Take care of yourself.....we all have to learn how to do that at times & what exactly it means for us.

Eskielover (Debbie)

Have a wonderful renewal! Make a fuss when you visit when so we can all say hello and hear about your growth in other directions.

Maybe, you'll find out that PC is where you'd like to spend a little more time. You're such a leader, I just can't see you lagging behind giving pats on the back instead of quick kicks in the rear!

Bonvoyage, skedaddle, and hurry back!---(you'll miss these smiles)