Building a Whole New Life

Try and take it one day at a time. You can’t be too far away from your vacation. A break will do you good.

Software licences can normally be renewed quickly, or is it slowed by requiring the finance depts authorisation? You won’t be the first person to let a software license lapse in a company, and you won’t be the last.

Have you seen any other job opportunities?

Jeff.

Thanks, Jeff.

I definitely have to take things one day at a time, given my stress and overwhelm. Renewing a license in my company is a a bit of a process, so I am pretty certain my boss will be angry. But you're right - I cannot be the only person who has let one lapse.

I fly out on Saturday am... I spent a good part of my weekend packing and prepping!

I survived the day and my boss didn't have the chance to come down on me about the software lapse. I was working from home so I sent a Teams message telling her I did not receive any notification telling me the software was expiring. BRILLIANT! LOL. That worked.

Four more days til vacation!!!

So, I rooted my boss on when she told us over Teams that she is training for a half marathon - no response, no thank you, no "like" or "heart" on my post - nothing in response to me showing my support. My teammates witnessed that. She makes her feelings towards me well known and obvious. Could she at least TRY to be less overt? GEEZ!

My annual review with my boss is tomorrow. I am DREADING IT.

And last night I accidentally purchased a $40 bottle of wine, draining my bank account until Friday. I was already in line and people were behind me at the register, so foolishly I decided I couldn't trade for another and bought it anyways. So stupid.

My annual review with my boss is today - UGH.

My review with my boss came and went. There were no major surprises. All constructive criticisms she included she had already talked to me about before.

However, my boss's boss was present in my review meeting with us, and I do not know WHY. That was VERY STRANGE to me. I don't feel comfortable about that. Who was he there for? Her or me? Or was he an objective party present? I don't know.

I got 21K in bonus money, so she did not skimp on my bonus. I am floored by that surprise! I expected 8K, so 21 is a huge improvement! The company met its financial goals by 150% so they gave an extra 6%.

At least it's all over - my annual review. It's been hanging over me for 2 months.

2 days til vacation!!!

That’s great news re the bonus and glad the review was constructive!

Hopefully you can relax a little more now, and go into your vacation ready to have a great time.

Jeff.

Thank you so much @Discombobulated and @NovaBlaze

I am thrilled. I am guessing that since her boss was present in my review meeting, that he may have ensured that her review of me remained strictly professional so no personal bias could be included. Perhaps. I am just guessing, but it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be.

The timing of my review finalizing and getting my bonus pay could not have worked out any better. I just paid off 5K of my debt and still have enough left to splurge on my vacation and to have a cushion in savings when I return. Phew.

God IS looking out for me - I have faith.

I leave tomorrow! I will be on the beaches of Mexico tomorrow afternoon, celebrating with a cocktail in hand!

Safe journey - make some wonderful memories, @Have Hope.

Jeff.

I will thanks so much!! 😊

Here I am in my Mexico hotel room!

It is soooo beautiful here!!! And my room is to die for:

2025-03-09_05-44-29 - TechSmith Screencast - TechSmith Screencast

Happy times! This is life at its best.

Jeff.

@NovaBlaze, it is!!!!

I am having. the best time! The ocean, the pool, the cocktails, the staff, my swim-up hotel suite, it's all just incredible!!!

Wednesday I am going parasailing and jet skiing!!! Gotta live it up!!!

I fly home on Thurs.

Sounds amazing!

It's sheer paradise! I am SO glad I came here. Although, I did get sad last night over missing my kitty cat and not having a partner with me.

I took myself out to one of the nicer restaurants to eat by myself and I was the only one dining alone. It was incredible food,l I had surf and turf with shrimp, but I felt very conspicuously alone, then went back to my hotel room a bit sad.

But today is a brand new day and I'm going to make the most and best of my time here. It's going to be a little cooler, but I think I will head. to the beach for the day. No pool, no pool party and minimal drinking for me today, LOL. I drank the day away yesterday! haha. I enjoyed myself.

Today I leave Mexico and have only a few hours before I head to the airport. Yesterday I went jet skiing and parasailing, both of which were a sheer delight!!!

I've truly enjoyed my vacation, except unfortunately, yesterday work interfered a little bit. Someone messaged about something I am in charge of, so I felt the need to reply. And that's the expectation - that you reply even when you're on vacation.

And of course, my boss became annoyingly cold towards me, so I had to deal with that too. But I didn't let work ruin my day and I enjoyed some beach, pool, and jacuzzi time. I even socialized a little bit.

Anyways, overall, I am very pleased with my experience in Mexico and at this resort in particular. It's quite luxurious, and I've truly treated myself. I overspent, but that's ok. I am bringing home some gifts for me and for family and friends.

Please help. I ran into my ex husband yesterday.. it was the first time in one year that we've spoken. I am angry at myself for not ignoring him and avoiding talking to him. But he came up to me, said hello, and I fell right back into a friendlier type of communication with him. We caught each other up on details of our lives - well, it was mainly him filling me in on his stroke, his heart attack, getting fired, then having a car accident whereby he now requires neck surgery. YEP. THose are the details he told me... and he also still tried to get back together with me - yet again - and walked away crying and tearful... he did.

And now I am left with I don't know what. But this morning, I felt really off kilter.

I wish I had not spoken to him at all - though I have to shamefully admit that it's nice to hear he's been suffering without me. He said he's tried to date, but that it's hard. We did talk a little about dating. I told him I had dated a former crack addict. LOL. I don't know why I chose to tell him that. I really do not.

I don't understand myself. Why do I do things the opposite of what I really should do????? Why did I tell him about a less than stellar guy I dated? What, to boost his ego and communicate that I haven't found anyone better yet?????? That's the last thing I want to communicate to him.

WTF is wrong with me???????

I did tell him how great I am doing otherwise. That I quit smoking, that I am exercising (well, I still plan on it), I told him about my vacations and trips and about work and that it's going relatively well aside from my boss.

So, to him, I am doing great, except perhaps with dating - and to me, he is doing fairly awful....

Maybe it's not SUCH a horrible thing to have run into him??? I don't know... you tell me, please... I need perspective here. I just feel very weird, like I've betrayed myself by speaking with him again and letting him in even just a little bit. Like he's won, and I lost.

It’s understandable that you were caught off guard. So, going forward, don’t have any communication again. From what I recall, from your previous posts, wasn’t this man abusive towards you?

Given how angry you are with yourself for talking to him, if he contacts you again just say you don’t want any further contact in future. Presumably he lives locally to you, which is how come he bumped into you, by chance?

It must be an awful situation to be in, but you don’t owe him anything. Remember that. You have zero obligation to this man. Keep strong and stay away.

Yes, he was very abusive. And because I'm a nice and decent person, I cannot stay mad forever.

But I won't unblock him and I won't reach out to contact him for any reason.

He still wants to be together.. he even invited me to a concert.

Then he walked away in tears over us. He couldn't hold himself together and he had to walk away and leave the venue/bar. I didn't go after him.

True, I don't owe him anything! I don't feel I do owe him anything.

The only positives are he got to see and hear how well I am doing without him and I learned he is moving out of my neighborhood next month. So those are pluses! Especially him moving.

I returned from vacation with a renewed vision for my life. I'm thinking of joining a yoga class with an instructor whom I sort of know through my music scene. She does these cool music/yoga combo classes with live musicians, whom I also know. I want to try it at least...

A good vacation is exactly what I needed in my life - it had been far too long and there has been far too much hardship on my plate over the last many years. My dad died, then I separated from my husband, then I lost my job, all in 6 months back in 2022-2023. This vacation soothed all the pain I had been carrying over the years.

It's amazing what 7 days off from work in a foreign country can do for a person.

I asked mr fun guy for a real date. I saw him Sat night when he was working the bar at the music venue I went to... I don't know why I like this guy so much or what attracts me so strongly too him - but I feel a stronger attraction for him than I knew about. While on vacation, we texted a bit and I sent him selfies. Maybe it's that he's entrepreneurial that I like. He does a variety of jobs to keep himself afloat - part time real estate, part time whole foods, part time bartender and part time dog sitting... but, those jobs create a busy schedule for him, we live an hour apart, and it's been tricky to schedule.

That being said, he said he would welcome a real date with me, so we have that but just need to set it up. I am waiting to hear back from him on when his schedule will allow a date. In the meantime, I am smiling.

I just rented a cottage in Vermont for August for 5 nights. I've got the bug now.

This is really good - you sound really positive and have a lot to look forward to. I’m happy for you.

Jeff.

@NovaBlaze, thank you my friend. I am doing pretty well after returning from vacation. It gave me the perspective and distance I needed.