So broke and so afraid

Okay, no, I did not overdo on the holidays. I have major check book issues and thought they were settled and went to get money to live on for the next to weeks and found there was none there. I am worried sick. Of course it is the kid's vacation and they will be wanting to do things. I can't take them unless it's free. It's a long story but basically my husband makes 1/2 as much money as he used to and I support all of us. I spend a fortune on health insurance. I have a major tooth ache and a major bill at the dentist. I have been so depressed in the last year that I have not even opened bills. I can guarantee that we will need heating oil before my next paycheck in two weeks, Hubby's is in 3. I am scared and want to withdraw. Depressed to boot.

Oh, man. This is bad, wisewoman. What can you immediately cut back on? Forget about what people want; focus on what they need.

We're strapped for cash here, too. My parents are...uhh... OLD and I'm incompetent. Some Christmas, huh. Well, I gotta grab myself by my bootstraps, as the expression goes and make some cash. If I have to hit the bottle every morning just to be functional; so be it. My liver won't be happy about that, though. Major changes coming for this family. It's hard, but it must be dealt with.

The kids will have to find something else to do this vacation time. If they ***** because of the lack of dough, they better remember who's been busting their *** to make it.

I hope everyone in your family is understanding of the PRESENT situation, wisewoman.

Things will improve, with everyone's help.

Take care, Wisewoman. Happy Holidays, to you and family (including the fuzzy ones)

-friedgreymatter

Thanks a bunch fried. I just went offline as hubby came up and I told him what was happening. He is going to get some assist from his parents. Here we are near 50 and we still need help! I have my son's car insurance due, electric, and fire all on Jan 1. That just ain't possible. Kids are always understanding but I hate to tell them I am so broke. Anyway, thanks a bunch.

wisewoman,

I so understand your situation. i had to quit work to care for the little man, and we were just making it then. my youngest had to get a job to take care of her spending money and we've had to really cut back. i'm worried about how we're going to make it at the bare minimum i soooooo understand.

i do not think there's anything wrong with hubby asking parents for help if they can afford it. we've had to do that before and i know if anything comes up, we may have to do that again, as we've gone through our savings, etc.

i wish you well, and i'm glad there's a current solution. you have someone in the same boat with ya, and we're survivors. this boat ain't gonna sink

love ya,

kd

hey.........i know broke........hang in there....xoxo pat

Broke stinks. Thanks all

((((((wisewoman))))))
Sorry that is all I have.

Jessica

((((ww))))) <font color="blue">

Yes, try and cut back. I only pay $10 a month for earthlink (they keep offering that for 6 months for new members, so I talk to a supervisor and say, I can quit and rejoin and get the price, or can you give it to me? Yep.)

Our State has a fund for those needing utility assistance, especially for heat. Does yours?

Or, call the gas company and work out some arrangements. Is it legal for them, knowingly, to deny you if you ask for gas in winter? If they don't know, they can't help. I know here they can't shut off water to a house, no matter how late they are paying....

Children do fine on freebies! It's your attitude that makes it fun or not... I grew up on it too, it's called "No Money Fun."

This too will pass. Ok? Hang in there.

(((((((((((((((((ww))))))))))))) I'm sorry. Wish I could help.

(((((((((WW))))))))))

I know where you are...it's where we've been for 2 years. It sucks. My parents and hubby's parents help as much as they can, but my parents are strapped at it is...and hubby's just don't get it...so we don't ask much.

I just got my paycheck that needs to last for a month...$310. Did I mention carpayments alone at $450? I don't know what we are going to do. We'll figure something out...we always do. But the worrying is awful. Sometimes I worry that I worry so much I will give myself some kind of illness. I worry about worrying! lol Kids understand. Plus, you are teaching them a valuable lesson. If they get everything they want when the want it they will not learn to budget and spend carefully.

You're doing the best you can. They know that. Good luck WW.

Sorry {{{{{{{{{{[ww}}}}}}}}}}}}, and welcome to my world. I lost a well-paying job, was unemployed for 10 months, and then took a job paying $11,000 less than the one I lost. So I've been in "dead broke" land for over 2 years now. You're right, it sucks.

My new job will pay me a whopping 18 cents more an hour, so that's no help. At least I'll have some teaching income this semester, but then summer will be here and I'll be back in the same old boat.

I didn't overspend on the holidays either, but my sister and my mom got me $50 in gas cards or I wouldn't have made it home today with my 1/8 of a tank and $3 in my checking account.

I guess you do the best you can with what you have. When I was a starving grad student, I learned all the places here that have free things for residents -- art museum is free on Sat. mornings, zoo is free for county residents on Wednesdays, etc. Investigate some stuff like that to do with the kids. They won't know if you pay for it or not.

Wish I could help more. When I hit the lottery, I'll remember you first.

Candy

he he thanks Candy. I know we will all get through. I am just sick of the stress is all. Can't even get to the bill thing right now. It's just too much. Need to create ways to make more money that are legal and fun. have to get back to work after a few days off and have to get work done. My kids are cool with their used stuff. We all love the used places. I found 6 pillows for my daughter's studio for $6.00. I am frugal. I will get it straightened out eventually. Have to have a little faith. Yes, and i am so stressed.

I am sorry wise, I know the feeling of being broke and it's no fun at all, I worry to the point of getting sick. please continue to have faith *hugs*

Oh so sorry wise, it is a hard place to be. Skybedark has some great ideas on the bills. Have you applied for some assistance thru the government? They help in a lot of ways if you have children. Call them and set up an appointment with a caseworker to find out all the benefits that are offered thru the government structure.

Many organizations also help out, especially at this time of the year. They help with food, toys, and clothing for the kids. Most everything is new, and your children won't know the difference. This leaves more money for you to save.

Library's are great with children too. In addition to taking out books, they have plays, story time and other activities set up. You can use that time to run errands, and not pay for a sitter. In addition, some library's will even allow you to take out Pictures for your walls, and videos to watch at home. This is great entertainment and fun.

For yourself, there are sometimes clinics that have Dental Students doing low cost dental work. These can sometimes be found thru your local college office. College offices are good sources for help, as the students there have to use local services while in school. They may even have a list of helpful information.

Keep letting people know you need help, and it will come.

Colors

Hey colors, thanks for your thoughts. My children are older, teens and adult. They are great kids. I finally came clean and wrote a post about the whole thing also in general about privacy vs. need to share. It is so complicated. I have a few days off and I am going to take 1/2 of 1 day to catch up on the rest of my job and I am going to get outside and do SOMETHING. Even if it's mucking out horse stalls with my friend. Anyway, thanks for your support, means a lot.

ww if you folks need clothing pm me we can ship some things to you
Angie

How dear you are. Are you sure your NOT the mama? Thanks my friend.

ww When it rains it pours but this time were here to help, we also have some canned foods if it will help
and yes I'm everyones Mama if they need me
Angie

Hey Mama not, we are oksy with food, I go to a small local grocer and called him early this week to set up a charge so we CAN eat. Clothes are also fine. We have friends who pass things around. It's silly but my daughter lost a pair of sports shorts for wrestling and my first thought was oh my I can't replace them! It is not life and death. The larger issues are with my spouse being threatened with jail and the fact that we have no money to buy meds and pay fines. The new deductible year is about to begin. Your love means a lot to me. It is with love that I reach to others as you did to me. Ha ha, a week ago I would have told you I desperately needed warm boots but my brother in law had hid 4 pairs of our boots and I found them Sunday. he is a little troubled. So now we all have warm feet. I have more then many. I was not meaning to complain in that way. it's just that when there are 0 dollars between you and a paycheck two weeks away, bills due, legal issues, it is overwhelming. Thanks for caring .

I know from being broke too, and it sucks, I am sending you good thoughts, and remember that eventually you will be able to look back on this from a more comfortable place.

thanks forgotten. I feel like I am getting too old for this stuff.

Talk about broke! I'm just starting to recover from a two year period of "maintenance ECT" that was 50+ treatments based on a misdiagnosis. Finally the breakthrough was the insurance co. assigning me a case manager and allowing me to see an MD for psychotherapy (he's been a God-send and life saver) because they figured out that the proper diagnosis and treatment would be cost-effective and didn't want me in-patient anymore. So then I got this job I love. . .and now I'm talking to you all. I'm accumulting wealth that has no $ value yet but it will. Last year we lost our house , went bankrupt, car died , etc.,etc, can't send girls to collage - not where I hoped to be after 46 years on the planet but as Scarlet said "Tomorrow is another day." (The actress is waking up )

((((((WW)))))) I just got back from Christmas and I'm attempting to catch up here! How are things now, my dear friend?

Angela

YAY YAY YAY wait till I tell the kids here wb

Wow WW, once again I can relate. My son from Florida came home for the holiday and what an eye opener it was for him. I have barely enough money to pay bills and then when winter comes, I have to juggle to buy propane for heat. While he was here I ran out of propane and didn't have the money to buy it for a couple of days. I told the kids when they complained about being cold to put another blanket on, or more clothes. We did get some heat finally, but I wrote the check on Wednesday knowing I would be paid on Thursday, but didn't get paid. Wont until Monday, hopefully the check won't bounce before my paycheck gets in. (sigh) could be another unaffordable cost....I think my son is glad to get back to the warmth of FL. I have to keep remembering to be thankful for having a roof over my head, a job that I can meet most of my expenses with and some food. I know that I am trying my best, but inside of me my heart hurts.