Every one you therapists suck. I hope you end up in Frued's paradise in the perpetual flux of eternal therapy. Your abandonments have destroyed me.
*.*.*.*. Every one of you.

Would you like to talk about it?

You sound very hurt, Would it help to talk?

[pegasus]

(((((( nothingtolivefor )))))

I'm really sorry you have been hurt by a therapist. A good therapist wouldn't hurt you. I'm sorry you are hurting right now.

[WikidPissah]

(((ntlf)))

Sorry things aren't going well for you.

[~EnlightenMe~]

((((((((Live))))))))))),
I am so sorry this is so painful for you. Talk to us if you need/want to, we are here for you! It helps to get all of the anger and rage out.

Tons of hugs to you.

[moonlitsky]

Sounds like agony. I hope you can talk about it when you are ready.

Moon

[stopdog]

I agree that they are mostly useless/dangerous unless one can find someway around how they think they are being to get some usefulness out of them. Sorry that you have been hurt by them.

[Anne2.0]

The last message I remember from you was that your T was leaving the agency where you received your therapy, because she was moving out of the community. I can understand that it can be painful to have to terminate for any reason, but I'm not sure this qualifies as abandonment or that it means an entire profession should be cursed.

I want to talk but I don't want to talk to another therapist who only care about enriching their bank account and making their living off my pain.
Before there were therapists their was friendship and community.

[pegasus]

I hope we can help here.

[~EnlightenMe~]

I'm here whenever you want to talk.

We had a confession session. All of the "Relationship" was a total lie.
My only goal was to trade the shame imposed on me my whole life for honor that I knew that rightfully belonged to me.
I did therapy and I actually paid someone lie to me.
All I wanted was a renewal and I am worse than I was before I went in. I will never trust anyone ever again.
I can't get myself back from her and that is all I ever had.
Therapists are nothing more that paid liars.
I have less value than a dog make that a worm.
I hate myself.

Not all therapists are like that...bullcrap!!!

[Moodswing]

Originally Posted by nothingtolivefor

I want to talk but I don't want to talk to another therapist who only care about enriching their bank account and making their living off my pain.
Before there were therapists their was friendship and community.

True but we were also the dirty secret in the attic.

[wotchermuggle]

Originally Posted by nothingtolivefor

Not all therapists are like that...bullcrap!!!

You can't paint everyone with the same brush, regardless of your personal experience. That's like saying all priests are pedophiles because of the action of a few. Or like saying that all male ballet dancers are gay.

You are obviously hurt, but that doesn't make what you FEEL to be necessarily be the truth.

[Anne2.0]

Originally Posted by nothingtolivefor

.
My only goal was to trade the shame imposed on me my whole life for honor that I knew that rightfully belonged to me.

This I get. That honor is still yours to have, but you will have to work to get it, with or without a therapist. Nothing else that anyone does or says either takes the shame away or gives it back. What you do with the shame is up to you, it's under your control. Fight for what you want for yourself and your life.

[TheRealFDeal]

I can identify. After my 5-month fruitless search for a new T, I'm surprised at just how many bad-to-mediocre ones there are.

[Lamplighter]

((((((( Nothingtolivefor )))))))) I'm so sorry you're still hurting so badly about your T - and I totally sympathize with feeling that way about all Ts

There may well be good Ts out there (well I hope so, because I think I've finally found one, but it took me ploughing my way through 35 of the suckers to find him ) but I'd have to agree with Realdeal here, there really are a lot of incompetent superficial by-the-book stuck in rigid model thinking incapable of adjusting the therapy or themselves to the client's actual needs Ts out there as well. And a lot who betray. It's not all nice and cushy and safe by any means, trotting along to see a T.

NTLF please feel free to vent here as much as you need to, I for one really relate to how angry and betrayed you must be feeling

Torn xxx

My relationship with that T is the epitome of every relationship associated with abuse. I have earned my honor and my manhood. She just found a way to reduce me from that for money. It wasn't until I suggested an ethical review board that she stopped.
What does that say?

[moonlitsky]

Sometimes, especially after doing the job for many years, I feel ashamed of my profession. I agree there are some really awful therapists out there - usually the ones who think they are ok and their clients aren't, when really their clients are more ok than them. I never cease to be shocked by the harm that is caused by therapists who don't get it. However, there are many who are good - and I believe they are the ones who know they are f***ed up too, only they did alot of work on it.

I too was hurt by an incompetent therapist who hadn't done her own work. I learned from it, I learned from my pain, I learned from my client's - and I believe I understand something that is more likely to mean I am a safe therapist. I'm not perfect because I am human, but I do ok. If I can do it, then there are others out there who can too. Don't lose hope, you can find the right one - but I think it is important to interview the therapist and ask questions that can give you an idea of safety. Don't ever just trust they are ok because they have a qualification - that doesn't mean alot.
I understand you hating therapists at the moment - I would do too if I was in your place. Speak out your rage and you will come to a calmer place.

Take care - you are in great pain.

Moon

My whole life has been sink or swim.
some of you may be aware of the sink or swim test, if not you can google it.
It's a test designed to measure endurance and resilience where rats were placed in glass jars with water to see how long they could trade water. in the first stage of the experiment they succumb to exhaustion and drowned at various lengths of time in the water.
in the second stage of the experiment, new rats were taught resilience by way of rescuing them before they drowned and holding them in in the facilitators hands and allowing them to wriggle free.
if the rats ever became dormant in swimming they were shot in the head with a blast the water to motivate them.
Then came time for the sink or swim test. Most of the rats lasted 60 hours or more before exhaustion won and they drowned. None of the rats survived.

My point...very simple.

In life we are all doomed. We will all face death. Just like those rats.
The experiment had little to do with the rats. The experiment had more to do with the facilitators who seeing the rats were doomed to a prolonged death, did nothing to offer a real rescue.

Each one of us has swam in glass jar as shame was imposed on us by another and some of us are still swimming in those jars that people love to put us in.
We are either putting people in glass jars or we are rescuing people from them.
My therapist loves to watch me swim.

Just keep swimming
Just keep swimming
just keep swimming swimming swimming
what do we do we swim( Dory) (Finding Nemo)

I am a rat swimming in my own tears.
The lights have been turned off. The door is locked and no one is coming back.
Here's where I think of the rats early on in the experiment.
What is better a rat that drowns after 15 minutes or one that drowns after 60 hours?

Just keep us swimming.

I have an idea...why not destroy the ****ing jars.

Destroy the jars and you'll destroy the desire to just give up.

That should be the goal of the therapist. Destroy the jars that they find their patients in and set them free without putting them in new jars.

Psychology needs a Reformation.

Catch phrase and cookie cutter psychology just doesn't cut it.

Thank you for the support and responses.

[Lamplighter]

I could say a lot about what you've just written, having come across rather a lot of Ts who subscribe to the cookie cutter approach, but as my abysmal attempts at typing are showing me, I've had one too many rums to be anything remotely resembling coherent .

So just posting to say I hear you NTLF and really sympathize with how you're feeling and thinking .

Have you thought at all of looking for another T, or has this experience completely turned you against the idea? (not that stupid a question really, as sometimes it helps to have a T help you get over the damage a former T has done.)

xxx