Couch 74

A&A - im mad at your t too. What is her issue?? She needs supervision. Or medication. Unless she meant it in A Tree Grows In Brooklyn sort of way. That is, you dont have many luxuries, so look on therapy as a luxury you DO have, youre allowed to have. Its all your to do whatever you want with. You can throw it away if you want to (as the girl does with her coffee and cream in the book - it makes her feel rich to have that luxury, instead of pinching even THAT penny. She does pinch all the other pennies though). So your t time is your time all devoted to you. That kind of luxury? Like maybe shes saying you dont seem to be able to relax into it and make use of it. Like i felt i wasnt getting my moneys worth unless i went in and left all grumpy. But it makes more sense to smile going in and leaving - isnt our ultimate goal to be more content? Cus when is that going to change - in session or out of session? With t or without t?

Mast - ooh, my t and his short memory are in for it now!! Unfortunately i think i value competition over caring - old lessons die hard - so as long as he lets me win the contest of who has the better memory, i'll be happy. But i'm happy for you!

Not feeling too well today, but I am trying to get things done.

Granite - I hope your cat is okay

Wikid, hope you're feeling better.

Granite, hope the cat is better. Fingers and toes crossed for you.

Both my cat and my mother in law's oldest cats are having kidney issues. My vet said that as their kidneys fail, the cats begin to feel very ill as the toxins build up in their bodies. My mother in law's vet said that kidney failure is a painless way for a cat to die. Now neither of us know what to do. Do we just let them continue to go downhill slowly? Do we stop their suffering (if in fact they are suffering) at some point?

Hi guys...

I have not read back so I'm not sure of the going on's at this particular moment. However, I hope you all are getting by the best you can and hugs to all that need and want them.

I've been around a lot less lately just from work. Boss is pregnant so I have job security if I want it as the kids just turned 5 and will go to school full time in the fall, which is when boss is due.

On the medication front, I can say that they certainly kicked in. I feel a difference in my anxiety levels. Granted, they are not the be all and cure all but they help. Other than that everything is still pretty much just status quo. Situational things are moving very slowly as I was told they would but I just want said situational things to end already. Not going to happen.

Other than that, I don't have much. I had therapy today and I'm a little tired but 4 (1mg each) of Klonopin a day plus 225mg of Effexor will do that to you.

I miss you all and will try to jump in again at some point. Right now I'm just doing my thing, and like many of you, doing my days the best I can to get thru them.

Hugs.

Granite how did you know your cat wasnt peeing?

I think she probably was referring to the fact that I don't have any other 'luxuries' so I should make the most of the 50 minutes being totally focused on me (but that feels wrong now) and yes, I should use it to its best advantage. At least I hope that's what she meant! I just feel so hurt and as if she was telling me I was being too demanding for voicing that I find 50 minutes too short and I find it hard to connect again after a break of 7 days. I don't know. I just don't know if I want to see her tomorrow. I haven't texted which I usually do during the week. She never replies. She says it's a 'boundary issue' basically saying I am too much, too demanding.

Thank you, Hankster for your reply. It means a lot.

MKAC...my sister's cat's kidneys were bad and she changed to a special food...prescription kind and he is much better now...

I always imagine animals are alot like humans..i have a friend in kidney failure and she will start dialysis soon... She doesnt feel so great so your vet maybe right...

Thanks, Ready. Neither cat will eat the prescription food. My cat is horrible about subQ fluids and my mother in law is afraid to try with her cat, so that option isn't working either. I have been adding hot water to the wet food to get extra fluid into mine. She's somewhere between 18-20. We adopted her as an adult from a shelter almost 17 years ago. My mother in law's cat is even older. So, it's not like this is a huge shock or anything; just very sad.

Hey Jersey.. thanks for checking in! Glad to hear that your meds are doing the trick! Are you planning to wean off the klonopin now that the Effexor is kicking in? Glad to hear about your job security!!

Sorry to hear about all of the animal health issues!

I went back to work today!!!! Been off for two months. It went so much better than I ever thought it would

I think you will know, when they are suffering, and when they are ready to go. I knew with my dog. Better a week too soon, than a day too late, imo

I've lost two cats to kidney failure. With the first one, she showed no signs whatsoever of being ill until suddenly one day she stopped eating, and growled quietly when we touched her belly. So we took her straight to the vet, and they made blood tests and found out that her kidneys were almost non-functional. The vet said that she (the cat) might possibly get another month or two of life but would probably be in pain and not at all be well. So the sweetest, cuddliest, most affectionate cat ever was taken from us with almost no warning, at the age of ten. I get tears in my eyes thinking about it now, though it was almost four years ago. Her sister lasted another year and a half, and got special food and was quite well until she, too, had a kidney failure.

I am so sorry for those who are facing the mortality of their pets.

I am so tired of living in a marriage where I have to hide what I'm thinking and feeling all the time. I wonder how long I can go on before I reach breaking point.

I am sorry you feel that way, Mast.. I know the feel all to well. I am around if you would like to talk!

I felt all those feelings, except the non-deserving. I have a healthy sense of entitlement.

As for "luxury", I think it was merely a poor choice of words on T's part. Perhaps she just meant, "Isn't it wonderful that we can have this time together?"

The only way to clear this up is to take it back to her, unfortunately.

My experience is that kidney failure is a major cause of death among cats. That and road accidents (males especially).

((Mastodon))

My one and only cat I had as an adult died of kidney failure. That was 11 years ago, she was so extraordinary I haven't felt I could replace her. She was human-dog-cat.

(((Mast)))
(((Jerz)))
(((Wiki)))
(((MKAC)))

Anybody else feel free to have a hug as need arises.

I completely agree with what Mast wrote, including wanting to slap your T. If it doesn't go well with her tomorrow, can you ask for a referral to another T?

Now that the workday is over whenever I get 5 minutes alone.... I realize my heart aches... My stomach hurts...and I tear up....

I'm sad....

Good thing i brought some work home to distract me.

ETA... seems like a little hole in my heart left by YT.

On a totally unrelated note my house-mate is selling me her Macbook. It is the sexiest thing I have ever seen. Everything is smooth and refined and not all square and clunky like Windows. I seem to be forgetting my grammar today.

Its been officially a month since my husband has spoken to me other than about schedules... And that is really via email and text

Staying strong just being me .... I will not let his manipulation control me. Sleeping in the same bed is ackward but I'm enjoying more space now that he is clinging to his edge... The healthier and better boundaries I get the worse the marriage gets.