[AnxietyMaster]

Hello!

As always I was doing some research on my future psychiatrist. He works with a group of psychologist and psychiatrists. My current psychologist recommended me to him.

Anyway.... I was looking at his perscribing habits, and noticed he was the fourth highest perscriber of Xanax in Arizona... Should I be concerned? It says on Medicare alone he has 55 patients receiving alprazolam. I am really concerned about this, as I do not want any psychiatric medication.

Thanks

[FranzJosef]

Originally Posted by AnxietyMaster

I was looking at his perscribing habits, and noticed he was the fourth highest perscriber of Xanax in Arizona

How did you find that out?

Someone has to be the fourth highest prescriber of Xanax. I don't see that as necessarily a problem.

[AnxietyMaster]

Originally Posted by FranzJosef

How did you find that out?

Someone has to be the fourth highest prescriber of Xanax. I don't see that as necessarily a problem.

Have you looked at projects.propublica.x org/checkup/drugs/?Also check out their other resources.... Mind you he is the fourth Psychiatric doctor....

Remove the x and space :#

You are right. Someone always has to 1-1,000,000th

Forgive me if this is a dumb question, but why are you going to a psychiatrist if you don't want to take any medication? What will he do for you?

[Restin]

I agree with Jo Thorne. It's very unusual nowadays for psychiatrists to do the hourly talk therapy, as they mainly just question patients long enough to make diagnoses to prescribe meds. Yours could be exception, but I don't recall your mention of it.
You certainly don't have to take any medicine you don't believe will help.

There is no psychotropic medicine that ever helped me feel better, and sometimes was an issue with a new psychiatrist at the hospital. I did better talking with a PhD psychologist and a good licensed social worker. Often they know more and better than any MD or PhD, but it's the fit that counts most, I believe.

I would let a psychiatrist prescribe a benzo or anti-depressant if he gave me a hard time, like saying the clinic won't treat me if I won't try out the medicine for 3 months, or sometime like that. But I didn't take the med, as the hangover made my life like a nightmare zombie. So, you kinda have to learn how to play their game, sometimes, sad to say, when you really want to do the talk therapy.

[AnxietyMaster]

Sorry for being so silent. I don't know why i was planning on going if I don't want meds. I would like to try medications but I have someone in my life who is very controlling and won't allow it. They have seen another family member suffer with schizophrenia and not get good help coupled with their own poor experiences with doctors limits my opprtunities too see a psychiatrist. Sorry if I am rambling, it's late and I should be sleeping.

The only reason I want to see someone is because I need relief from symptoms. Isn't that the reason anyone goes? I have weekly violin lessons, and I was shaking so much I couldn't play. It wasn't because I was cold, but instead I was so afraid to play in front of one other person. I can no longer shower at night, because of "visions" of terrible things happening to me and my loved ones. I was also recently diagnosed with a bowel issue that took me years to say anything about because I couldn't work up the courage to say anything. I am sorry if I wasted your time, I just really needed to say this because I have very limited opportunities to talk about this. But yet again are these really symptoms of a anxiety disorder? I have had a growing number of panic attacks within the last month as well. I just can't get the courage to make that first call.

:group hug:

Yes, you deserve help and I hope you'll be able to get the help you need.

When I first saw my psychiatrist at a public hospital (referred by primary care) I refused meds but he was able to "prescribe" me therapy with a clinical psychologist.

Maybe you and the doctor can work out other possible med options like injection instead of pills if you later decide to go on meds?

He should respect your choice to not take meds though, but since the reason you're reluctant is due to overcontrolling family, maybe he has other options.

[musinglizzy]

Originally Posted by AnxietyMaster

I would like to try medications but I have someone in my life who is very controlling and won't allow it.
:group hug:

I'm assuming this is a parent or a partner. You need to do what's best for YOU. No one else is living your life, YOU are. So I'd try to work on not allowing anyone to tell you what you can and can't do (within reason, of course). Unless, of course, you are a minor....then the rules are a bit different. You are not wasting anyone's time by posting here, so don't worry about that! You don't have to be silent anymore...

I, too, have stomach/bowel issues...anxiety really sucks sometimes!

[AnxietyMaster]

Originally Posted by musinglizzy

I'm assuming this is a parent or a partner.

Unless, of course, you are a minor....then the rules are a bit different.

I, too, have stomach/bowel issues...anxiety really sucks sometimes!

1 Yes. If you read the following rant, I say it only at the end.

2. We'll just say "very" minor. Between the ages of 14-11 but on the latter. In other words, a newly spawned teenager.

3. Yeah. Especially when you think that those cramps you are having, are actually that small amount of glass that you might have eaten passing through your digestive tract ripping up your intestines -_-

Here is a post that I was typing, that turned out being a horrible rant. You don't really have to read, as it is just bashing w/o getting to the point. I just wrote this because I was angry :3

It covers a lot of what you guys said too.

Possible trigger:

"Hello Everyone!

How do I tell someone very close minded, opinionated, and worried about me that I need help? I have been seeing a school consular for about 2 years every week or so.
I have the feeling she has exhausted her helpfulness, and she even asked me to basically "move on". It wasn't very hard to hear since our relationship was very shallow.
I asked her (not the counselor) to make me an appointment to see my primary care, as well as at a counseling center. She put this off for months, and I reminded her twice.
The first time she said sure, I’ll make it. A month goes by, I ask only about primary care. She calls, and I get an appointment that day. This is all good, because
I have an illness that I have been living with for 6+ Years that I could have gotten relief from, but was not confident to say anything. Colonoscopy and Endoscopy on Thursday (fingers crossed) for it!
It's been 4 or 5 months and I reminded her again. This time she blew up on me, and we screamed at each other. We fight all the time, but its fine by now.
We recently had a fight (her side) about how all psychiatric medication makes you gain 100s of lbs. I said this is mainly with antipsychotics, but she said "No it's all that she**"
She tells me "The psychopharmaceutical industrial complex is not your friend! They don't care about you!" and I will tell her "That's why you have someone (P) to care about you and offer guidance!"
When I am at home, she ignores me, and when I ask her if she is mad at me, she says "No it's fine". She is all mop all the time, because she cannot work up the courage to
Talk to her doctor about her side effects. I tell her all you have to do is ask, she says "It doesn’t matter, she's payed off anyway". I will look up her doctor to show her she is not,
But she doesn’t believe the government database. She likes to tease me about the feelings I am having as well. "Wow, when they give you the profile for your procedure it will do wonders for your anxiety! *giggle*"
She is always telling me "You should eat healthier!" then when I ask her if I can get things to make food "No" mind you, I can't drive.
She doesn’t believe that mental illness is a thing, and that it is caused by "Big Pharma". She has had experience with mental illness, as he brother was Schizophrenic.
I told her that I can't go up to the counter to ask for help because I am worried about criticism, and that it takes me time to work up courage.
Her response was "Wow, that's really sad." The other person I seek for support is always over worked and stressed. Sometimes in a day, I won't eat anything because there is nothing but sweets in the house
Then he comes home, and won't take me to get food. Mind you, I am not allowed to cook. She is always talking about how "stressed" she is.
Literally all day, she sits in the same spot on the couch, reading news on her iPad. She then takes a carton of Ice Cream and eats it straight out of it.
Not to mention, she loves it when she actually has work to do, but "complains" about how much she has to do. The company she hires to manage her condo rentals called her
And needed an EIN number. She had not applied for you, and was freaking out that she had so much to do. It's literally a five min. process. She had me do it anyway.
I tell her about how at night I have horrible thoughts, and that it prevents me from doing things, and she says "That's so funny."
We got in a fight about college as well. It wasn't over anything. I always talk in a clear, not raised voice. She gets angry when she doesn’t get her way.
She told me honestly how she feels about me having "issues". Because of this, I don't talk about me problems with anyone. This is most likely why I am coming on here to vent (sorry)!
Although she is very smart, she is very closed minded and stubborn. She loves to tell me about how I think that I am the smartest person in the world (I don't).
She loves to bring this up when she has no evidence in an argument. She showed me something about how "Some people can't lose weight because of their genetics".
I told her I don't think that is right. While I do agree that this might be a genetic disposition, it's not her. It was on some tabloid website, and it had
The most vague "symptoms" that are just normal human feelings. "Do you feel fatigued, dry mouth, or itchy eyes? Well maybe you can't lose weight!”
I told her about how many people have much success on Metformin to lose weight, but you have to follow a diet. She said "Well! It must not work for me, because I have been!"
Sorry, Ice-cream is not a diet. I made the mistake of inviting her to the gym with me, where she just judges me instead of actually doing something.
Tells me "You should learn to lose weight, and control it", I haven't lost or gained any weight in 6/months.

Oh my gosh. I just realized that this just turned into a big rant! Thank you if you read my rant! I could go on for days!

TL;DR:

How do I gain confidence?
How do I manage stress and anxiety?
How do I stop fighting with "her"?
How do I find an outlet to talk about my issues with, that doesn’t require driving?
How do I control "her"? (Not in a bad way!)
How do I control myself?
How do I convince her to let me see a T?




Yes, those people are my parents.

As I extract from this rant above:

TL;DR:

How do I gain confidence?
How do I manage stress and anxiety?
How do I stop fighting with "her"?
How do I find an outlet to talk about my issues with, that doesn’t require driving?
How do I control "her"? (Not in a bad way!)
How do I control myself?
How do I convince her to let me see a T?

I would go see a primary care, but I have to ask. Plus, it makes my bowl condition act up when I go see doctors.

I don't know. My (very old) mother seemingly has variable moods every day. Late at night (1-2) she is a joy! Morning/all day she is horrible to be around with a very bad attitude. With the exception of random days when she is really happy, and will take us to do things -_-



I feel as if my forum post has lost direction.

[ruh roh]

Honestly, I don't think you need medication. From everything you've described—your anxiety, physical symptoms and distress—are all very understandable considering your crazy-making family. Can a school counselor connect you with a therapist without having to get your mother's okay?

My therapist is the first one who told me that my mother shows every indication of having a mental illness; if I had known that growing up, and gotten outside support, I would not be nearly as messed up today (and on medication). You have a real chance to get help while you're young. I hope you can find at least one person to connect you with a therapist and/or tell your mother it's necessary for your well-being. But medication/psychiatrist? I wouldn't recommend going that as a first route at all.

[AnxietyMaster]

Originally Posted by ruh roh

Honestly, I don't think you need medication. From everything you've described—your anxiety, physical symptoms and distress—are all very understandable considering your crazy-making family. Can a school counselor connect you with a therapist without having to get your mother's okay?

My therapist is the first one who told me that my mother shows every indication of having a mental illness; if I had known that growing up, and gotten outside support, I would not be nearly as messed up today (and on medication). You have a real chance to get help while you're young. I hope you can find at least one person to connect you with a therapist and/or tell your mother it's necessary for your well-being. But medication/psychiatrist? I wouldn't recommend going that as a first route at all.

Thank you for telling me this. I don't think that I need medication either. I can't be connected with a therapist w/o my mother's OK, because of $$$$. She (school c) recommended a place for us, but I didn't want to go because I don't believe in "healing with faith" and have had poor experiences with the Catholic Church(Also it's only group?!?!?). I found a counseling center that I hope to go to, but, again I can't drive and am too scared to bring it up with her again. Medication wasn't really what I was aiming for, but I think it might seem that way. It's just that sometimes I wish there was an off switch for all of the anxiety and such. I have a friends mom who is a psychiatrist, but I don't know if I would want to go to someone that I know.

One other thing that got me in the mindset of medication was that the counselor said that might be what will happen. I made it clear to her that I really wanted coping strategies instead. She offered me her best, but none of it really worked for me.

I feel like I am walking through a dark room w/o lights. At night I come on here and write, but don't really know what I am talking about, and don't compose my thoughts. Then when day comes, I write more, but more "competently". I really should stop coming on here at night. Night is when I have all of my bad ideas, such as dying my eyebrows blonde (wut).

Anyway, I think the reason I was thinking (Medication!) was because it was presented as a "magic pill"? What I really was thinking was "How can I get relief, that is fast and solve my problems?" I know that medication does not cure illness, but instead treats the symptoms.

If you don't mind, what is CBT like? I have heard about it, but I don't know anything about it.



Oh, and sorry I got so defensive.

[ruh roh]

Others can answer more about CBT, but I would again say that you don't really need to change anything about yourself; it's the situation you're living in that's the problem. If posting on a forum at night helps relieve some of your stress/pressure, then keep doing that.

I'm surprised that the only recommendation was faith-based therapy. I wish you could live with an emotionally stable relative. Is there any chance of that? Putting you on medication without changing the environment is like sending someone back into war with numbing drugs. It doesn't really make things better.

Also, do you think there's a chance someone could convince your mother that therapy would help with your physical health? It might take someone telling her it would be considered neglect to keep you from getting help. You need a good advocate. I wonder if a crisis line could help you figure this out?

[AnxietyMaster]

Originally Posted by ruh roh

Others can answer more about CBT, but I would again say that you don't really need to change anything about yourself; it's the situation you're living in that's the problem. If posting on a forum at night helps relieve some of your stress/pressure, then keep doing that.

I'm surprised that the only recommendation was faith-based therapy. I wish you could live with an emotionally stable relative. Is there any chance of that? Putting you on medication without changing the environment is like sending someone back into war with numbing drugs. It doesn't really make things better.

Also, do you think there's a chance someone could convince your mother that therapy would help with your physical health? It might take someone telling her it would be considered neglect to keep you from getting help. You need a good advocate. I wonder if a crisis line could help you figure this out?

I really hope that you don't take this the wrong way, but I think that either I or you have a misunderstanding. Actually I think it is me. I think the big issue is that she does not understand that when she complains, or dosent talk to me, something in MY mind tells me "She dosent love you any more". She dosent understand that very little things can set me off, and for no reason I am worrying about everything. Most of my relatives are dead, I have two uncles going through a divorce on my fathers side, and one uncle who is in and out of the hospital because of kidney failure on my mothers side. My grandfather is ill and my grandmother is fine on my dads side, while my mother's are both dead.

What I really need is some way to cope with the the stress from school, and life. I need some way that I can stop the constant worry. I know that she wants the best for me, but sometimes walking on a floor of broken glass, and stepping on one of the shards hurts. I need some way to tell myself that people aren't judging me. I need some way to tell myself that I like myself as I am. The problem with me not getting help does not lie with her, but instead me. Last time I asked, she became angry with me, most likely because she dosent know how to help. Because of this, I told my father recently that I still want to go.nhe said that she dosent think that I still want to go. It might be worth while having my dad talk to her.

I think I over exaggerated the problems that I have with her. Was really angry when I wrote that, as we just had faught. It's just that I feel as if her comments and care are not always genuine.

[ruh roh]

I guess I reacted the way I did because you're a minor and I see your parents as the adults; but I agree that asking for ways to cope is a good thing for you to do. I just didn't think you should bear the burden of all this. Your mother's comments, if those are verbatim, are concerning...but yeah, figuring out how to cope is key.

Thanks for the information. Your situation sounds incredibly tough. You sound very intelligent and determined, so that is good.

Sometimes psychiatrists (or primary care doctors) prescribe non-psychiatric medications for psychiatric conditions. I especially thought of that when you mentioned your hands shaking when you play your violin. A lot of people take a type of blood pressure medication, one of the beta blockers, for anxiety. You don't have to take it every day, either, if you're taking it for anxiety. Public speaking and music performance are two of the big things people take it for. If you get a chance to see your primary care doctor soon or talk to them, you could ask about this. If you have a good primary care doctor, he or she can be a big advocate for you with your parents.

[AnxietyMaster]

Originally Posted by jo_thorne

Thanks for the information. Your situation sounds incredibly tough. You sound very intelligent and determined, so that is good.

Sometimes psychiatrists (or primary care doctors) prescribe non-psychiatric medications for psychiatric conditions. I especially thought of that when you mentioned your hands shaking when you play your violin. A lot of people take a type of blood pressure medication, one of the beta blockers, for anxiety. You don't have to take it every day, either, if you're taking it for anxiety. Public speaking and music performance are two of the big things people take it for. If you get a chance to see your primary care doctor soon or talk to them, you could ask about this. If you have a good primary care doctor, he or she can be a big advocate for you with your parents.

Thank you very much! I might end up being on high blood pressure medication anyway, as my blood pressure when seeing the doctor skyrockets. I saw my PCD a couple weeks ago, because of my bowl issue. I do not like to think of my situation as being tough, because many people are in much worse situations than me. Thank you for the advice!

[AnxietyMaster]

Originally Posted by ruh roh

I guess I reacted the way I did because you're a minor and I see your parents as the adults; but I agree that asking for ways to cope is a good thing for you to do. I just didn't think you should bear the burden of all this. Your mother's comments, if those are verbatim, are concerning...but yeah, figuring out how to cope is key.

I don't mind the comments, as many times we are both in a very angry situation. It's not like something she would casually say to me. Sometimes the kids have to be the adults. That is another issue I would like to ask about. Although I am still very young, 13, many people treat me as though I am an adult. This has only started recently. I do look much much older than I really am, but I do not feel emotionally 16 or 18 but instead 12 or 13. Does this make sense? I feel the rigorous adult social standards seeping into my world of lawlessness. Is this part of growing up?

[Restin]

While you're working out how to see a therapist, it could help to keep coming here and post and read. i've learned so much from others here and have wonderful support. I see a good therapist at my county clinic. It's a real bummer having to tread so softly around your mom to get what you need. From your posts, it seems like talking to a counselor or therapist of some kind is what you really need. And some help with your digestive condition would help as well.

As you may already know, seeing a psychiatrist might be a good plan after all, not to get meds, but to have him deal with your mom with his official stance. If she would take his advice, you would have referral to a psychologist who works with the psychiatrist for the talk therapy. But I realize you want to avoid dealing with her at all when she's so controlling about it all. Maybe someone at school can help and not betray your confidence.

[AnxietyMaster]

Originally Posted by Restin

While you're working out how to see a therapist, it could help to keep coming here and post and read. i've learned so much from others here and have wonderful support. I see a good therapist at my county clinic. It's a real bummer having to tread so softly around your mom to get what you need. From your posts, it seems like talking to a counselor or therapist of some kind is what you really need. And some help with your digestive condition would help as well.

As you may already know, seeing a psychiatrist might be a good plan after all, not to get meds, but to have him deal with your mom with his official stance. If she would take his advice, you would have referral to a psychologist who works with the psychiatrist for the talk therapy. But I realize you want to avoid dealing with her at all when she's so controlling about it all. Maybe someone at school can help and not betray your confidence.

I have been wandering about here for awhile. I am having a colonoscopy and upper endoscopy this Friday to look for issues. Hopefully I can get get it all figured out. She thinks that psychiatrist are just drug pushers. Although, let's be honest, some are. I have a friend I talk to at school, it's a mutual friendship. She helps me manage anxiety, and I help her with her panic attacks. They get so bad, but her psychologist won't do anything for her. Thanks so much for the care!

[AnxietyMaster]

Hello! I know I am at this point just kicking a dead cow, but...

Well, FINALLY I worked up the courage to say something about me wanting to see a therapist. We were out to eat, and my dad was there. We were talking about my gastro. as we have not heard anything yet. I mentioned that I would like to go to a therapist. My mother instantly said "Why? So they can give you drugs, then have you go sit in the corner?". I then asked her if she knew the difference between a psychologist and a psychiatrist. She then said sarcastically "Sure (insert name here), tell me!". I explained that a psychologist works to find coping strategies, while a psychiatrist is mainly medication management. She then continued to tell "Well if you go see a psychologist, he will just have his psychiatrist buddy write you the psychologists "recommended prescriptions". During this, my father was trying to stop us from bickering by telling her about a psychologist I was looking at. She disregarded this, and continued to talk. In the end, I just said "Yes. Whatever your opinion is." She then continued to spew conspiracy theories about how all doctors are out to get you, and that they don't want you to get better. Failed attempt #2!

My dad isn't like this. Although I would try to work through him, he wouldn't be the one taking me to my appointments.

What should I do? Suggestions?

[Tearinyourhand]

it seems unlikely your mother will change her position. perhaps you can talk to another trustworthy adult who isn't faith based, your dad, school counselor or supports your mom's world view. someone who can effectively advocate on your behalf. but you have to be careful. I have worked with youth in your similar situation maybe who were LGBTQIA and not to scare you but often times we had to remove those youth from their home for their own safety. I don't think your situation is dire. at least I hope it's not but there is cause for concern bc your mother seems predisposed to not support any form of treatment for anxiety or mental illness. why isn't your dad able to advocate on your behalf?

[AnxietyMaster]

Originally Posted by Tearinyourhand

it seems unlikely your mother will change her position. perhaps you can talk to another trustworthy adult who isn't faith based, your dad, school counselor or supports your mom's world view. someone who can effectively advocate on your behalf. but you have to be careful. I have worked with youth in your similar situation maybe who were LGBTQIA and not to scare you but often times we had to remove those youth from their home for their own safety. I don't think your situation is dire. at least I hope it's not but there is cause for concern bc your mother seems predisposed to not support any form of treatment for anxiety or mental illness. why isn't your dad able to advocate on your behalf?

My situation is not that bad. She is loving, just opinionated. My father isn't the strong one in the relationship. He works a lot, but is submissive. He does advocate for me, but in general he just listens to her. Since school has let out my options have been pretty limited. How do I approach this? I normally see the school counselor, but she recommended me to faith based treatment. This was the only time I could talk rationally about this with my mother. I am not in contact with this counselor right now, and won't be for awhile.

The school had me on

Possible trigger:

suicide

watch because I couldn't function In the school environment for awhile. I had them contact my dad. It was simply because I was so anxious and couldn't manage the stress, pressure, or anxiety. Maybe I should have had them contact my mom? I was too scared because I thought she would freak out on me.

That did scare me about the home removal :/

****i am not

Possible trigger:

suicidal

[AnxietyMaster]

Hi everyone. I was just talking with my mother about vitamins, and she told me that she tried to get her internist to perscribe her something for anxiety. Instead she perscribed her antidepressants, which she was unhappy about. I tried to tell her medicine shouldn't be used as the first line of defense, instead coping strategies. She said the reason for her anxiety is life problems like no income, or not being able to pay bills. This is no reason to take medicine, so I suggest stead coping strategies. She said "You know what would be a great coping strategy? If I kill that B**** Jane!" I tried to explain that his was not the right course of action, but clearly she didn't care and kept talking about how she wants to stab her over and over. Then she went outside to smoke... I saw her making stabbing motions 0.0

After this I was overcome with many emotions. Anger, I scream louder than ever and my throat hurts so much now. I slammed my pillow against my bed. Fear. I was crying, but writing this helped me settle down. Saddness. Again, crying.

Why does she get to seek help, and not even accept it, if I can't even? I am so sorry but what the f***?!?! She constantly tells me that I think I am the smartest person in the world, but I do not. Why does she think this, or is it just to aggravate me? Why won't she listen to some of my suggestions?