Couch 121: An Intimate Chat.

Apparently manspreading as it is called, has been banned in NY but we still get a lot of it in the UK

'Ban manspreading': Brits want men to sit with their legs together - Telegraph

I've always wanted to be able to do that feminine thing! But no matter my weight, my thighs are always just a bit too big.

I shall now try to proceed to brunch after vigorously attempting to erase the idea of all things crotch-smell from my brain.

So, obviously, I don't do the feminine thing while sitting either. But, then again I don't wear short, tight skirts.

Okay, I guess that is the prude in me.

If the skirts are tight, how can they spread?

When a t man spreads it can be alarming. How can someone so educated not be aware that they are pretty much making a primitive display of virility and dominance. Or maybe the office chairs were uncomfortable. I don't like asking others how to sit but I felt like the guy's junk was in my face.

Maybe the flashing comes when they cross their legs? Like Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct?

I think I would probably just ask if I noticed. "Hey - why do you sit with the classic display of virility and dominance? Are you feeling the need to be all dominaty today?"

Never saw it - sounded too scary of a movie for me

And for us commuters, there's also the female equivalent, she bagging......

The way I sit has always gotten me reprimanded by various family members and one, embarrassingly nosy, stranger. "Could you possibly sit like a lady?"

I don't wear short skirts either, awkwardlyyours, based 100% on the indecent exposure charges sure to follow!

Sometimes I shake my head and say to myself "only on PC...." Who else could I possible talk to about this stuff.

They would probably have a mansplanation for that.

In the interests of general edification etc --

The skirts are tight enough that if the knees are not close together and even a bit apart (nowhere near manspreading standards), the uhhh....flashing happens.

ATAT -- I SO wish it was as intentional as Stone in Basic Instinct (I'll admit that my tastes are gutter-y enough to have found that hot). No, instead these two mostly just seem to sit there oblivious -- it's not just crossing and uncrossing. At some point, I suppose they figure it out (maybe I'm not as poker face as I think I am) and then the crossing / uncrossing happens. Former T would go a step further and put her feet up on the side of the coffee table in front of her. Arggggghhhhh.

SD -- I didn't know about the virility / dominance stuff. I just put it down to sheer cluelessness or not having another client who's as much of a prude as I am. As in, I've heard that when someone wears stuff to show cleavage, it's intentional but this stuff is largely considered unintentional / clueless stuff.

P.S. So, in all seriousness, I know that theres a very fine (non-existent) line between my discomfort / stance and being anti-feminist. So yeah.

I still can't picture it - but I am not the most visual person nor the most observant -so there is that. Seriously I have missed all sorts of sexual stuff in movies that people talk about - I am like - I saw that movie - are you sure that happened and entire rooms have turned and looked at me with disbelief.

I have no tolerance for manspreading-type displays. Once, I came across a young guy in droopy pants holding onto himself while walking with his girlfriend. I asked him if he was having problems down there. He stopped, and yelled "What did you say to me?" I said, "You look like you've got a problem in your pants you might want to have a doctor look at." He didn't have answer to that one. Honestly, no one wants to see that s**t.

I am grouchy. I got home at 3 this morning from a road trip with youngest. And as often happens, even though I felt tired while on the road, it took a while for me to go to sleep. Had t at 8 this morning, so not much sleep. I came home and went back to bed. H and youngest decided to leave and put dogs that we are watching for D2 in crates, whereupon they started to yowl and got all the other dogs barking. Not a happy camper.

Maybe it's, like, extremely uncomfortable not to man-spread? Maybe asking men not to do it is like asking women to do that double-cross at thigh and ankle thing? Insidious social control?

As much as I really wish my T would bring those knees a little closer together, I don't want him to spend the entire session thinking "My balls are sweaty," either.

I just don't want to think about my T's balls, period.

I feel like this topic deserves a legit thread of its own. I would totally start it except of course, I am absolutely certain that it will very very soon lead to the discussion on whether or not Ts doing this is yet another a sign of their basic evil / angelic nature and / or the role of clients' distorted perception in all of it (see for example, the existential angst evoked by the idea of 'spreading') and the thread will go down in history / flames?

Ok new thread started but I opened it up to all t habits that are distressing

Someone remarked the Couch was slow yesterday. All it takes to perk it up is discussion of manspreading and crotch sights and smells!

And unaluna wasn't even on here today.

I can't stop thinking about it, now.

It probably is a dominance display. His chair's a few inches taller than mine, too.

Why, why.. Now I am going to be tempted to look at t and how he is sitting next time...

Though, recently my son had an appointment with is orthopedic doctor and the min he walked in I was surprised at how tight his pants were.. And then he sat down in his doctor's stool and let just say I could see the full package.. The pants were just too damn tight!

Well that brings a whole different light to the issue! It's not a matter of spreading, but trouser fit...

I did read a man's response (not sure how tongue in cheek) where the physical differences of hip joints, thigh shape, balance, and numerous other factors were pointed out.

I don't care if it's a comfortable seating position, if the man in question is encroaching on my space, I'm going to spread my bulky overweight behind into every millimeter of my space and pretend ignorance. Maybe he'll contain his spread to defend against mine!

Husband just confirmed it's quite uncomfortable to not man-spread. Confirmed he does not sit like a gentleman unless it's a space issue--that is, not encroaching on others' space.

Amen to the bulky behind!

Also just realized I she-bag in session, so I guess there's guilt to go around.