Couch 127: The Wayward Couch

My face would do the same!! One time my t said something about wild women dancing naked in the woods and I wished for a hole to open up in the floor and swallow the whole couch with me on it I turned so many shades of red.

I told my T a story about when my horse got out and ran into the woods at night. He took off and then about 5 minutes later i heard a very panicked horse scream. I thought he was hurt or stuck so i ran off after him without a halter or rope or anything to lead him back with. It was a full moon so no flashlight.

I found him and he had gotten himself lost in a thick marshy area in the woods behind the farm. He was too scared of the mud etc to just follow me, and i was scared that if i left him he'd panic and hurt himself. So after thinking for a second i took off my shirt and bra, fastened the bra around his neck, tied my shirt to it, and led him home topless in the full moon.

It was one of the few times ive felt truly at home and happy in my body. I just felt like a goddess , leading my horse through the trees in the moonlight.

My T wants to think she is very outdoorsy but she isnt, especially to a farm girl like me, and i tease her about it. She says " what a wonderful story!! You should have taken off the rest of your clothes and just walked like a real goddess!"

I looked at her aghast for a second then said "have you ever been in the woods, T???? Briars, pine needles, burdock???? Uh. No. "

She laughed for a good minute after she thought about it

Squirrel, I am concerned about your working conditions. Do you belong to a union or have anyone who can represent you in seeking a different job assignment? Even a disability advocate who can go with you to mediate this with your supervisor? It's just wrong. I hate to think of your sweet self holed up in a room alone like that. It can't be helping your mental state.

This, and also...why do you have to be locked in the room? That's a real violation to me. Not just of personal freedom, but also dangerous - what if there's a fire or other disaster?

Yeah, this seems wrong on so many levels :eek

squirrel are you physically locked in a room at work or do you mean you are required to sit in this small room waiting to see if a teacher might send you a student to work with . do to my past of being locked in a room for days at a time this would be a big deal breaker for me .

im going to get my tattoo today to commemorate surviving my heart surgery .ouch .

I think your tattoo will hurt significantly less than open heart surgery

Echos-did you erase your thread?

Yeah, I was just finding some of the input a little more difficult to bear than I anticipated. It made me realise how vulnerable I feel at the moment and I need containment to explore this stuff, which I guess isn't in abundance on a public forum.
I emailed T as I started to make sense of some of the feelings (a lot of the input was really helpful for helping me get to the bottom of what was going on) and I felt sooo much better after I had written it all down and sent it to T (I was fighting back tears before that, which is very unusual for me!).
Thanks for asking.

It can be difficult to get lots of input on a situation that you haven't had time to process yet (I've had that with some threads on here). I'm glad e-mailing your T made you feel better. Hope he gives you a good response--I know you've said before that his e-mail responses often aren't what you're hoping for.

IMO two months is a long time. And the skills you used to help yourself are still there.

ahhh, got it. glad to hear you e-mailed your T, and I hope it goes well, because he (right?) seems like a good one!

(((squirrel)))

Doesn't time fly when you're depressed *sarcastic* Only 3 days to see T seems like yesterday i was saying 28 days.

Hugs, BCM.

I'm considering going to an Al Anon meeting on Saturday. I've been to the website but I don't know what to expect. I detest twelve steps but I can't find alternative meetings in my area.

Thanks LT

Yeah he is. He can be a bit pants at email sometimes though so we'll have to wait and see.

I had a weird dream last night that he and I were running from a terrorist attack. It was pretty vivid.

38 hours worked this week, 20 more to go! I got this! (yawn)

morning couchies!

Sometimes I think there are people who have more rollercoaster sounding emotion in one hour than I do in a whole year.

Hey couch... I'm on break just checkin in. Very very slow morning, i had only 2 calls in 2 hours!! And they were both in the last 15 minutes. Makes up for my the back to back calls from like 3pm to 6:30pm yesterday.... That was nutz. Hope everyone is well n sending hugs to all who want.

I would probably be one of them here lately haha

I can't believe I just agreed to work a 3rd hour of overtime today. Yay money!

Well, i do get an extra 15 minute break at the 10 hour mark...

Well a day really goes sour when a friend texts you that you are beyond reproach, insufferable and self-centered.

Crying at work. So fun!

Beyond reproach means a good thing. Text them back that they are effing illiterate. Geez, if youre gonna insult me, dont make me laugh at your ridiculous idiocy.