Couch 179: Even-numbered days in a year

Welcome to the couch, old and new! A place to hang out - sometimes you get immediate feedback, sometimes you don't.

Shouting, "Cool Whip" tends to bring others out from between the cushions if you're feeling lonely.

This is a chatty thread. All are welcome. We're kind of psychologically oriented, sometimes. We try to be supportive. At times we discuss what that means.
It’s a place to plop down on the couch when you come home from work or wherever, or wake up in the middle of the night, or check in at lunch, rant a bit or not, and be among friends.

We advise you not to drink or drug and text your therapist ("T") - we speak from experience.

Sometimes the thread moves fast and you might get overlooked; sometimes it moves slowly and all you hear are crickets. Sometimes you get hugged or thanked pages later. So if it's a bigger question, you might want to start a new thread.

Grab a cushion, a spot on the floor, or an armchair in the corner and make yourselves comfy!

Personal meaning: I failed the marshmallow test bigly as a kid! Dad was tired of brother and me arguing over tv show choices, told us to choose odd or even numbered calendar days. Current day was even - that was my choice. My older brother said ha ha, he gets odd which is more days (182/3). I said i dont care, i get my choice NOW.

New couch yay! Thanks una!

Thanks Una

Hey just saving a spot, gotta get to sleep!

Artie how was your session?

Yeah, curious minds want to know

I'm typing it up now.... I did it by the way.

So I made it to t on time, don't know what was up with my car. It started right up after my session, and again after son and I went out to dinner. Anyway. My session.

It was pretty darn awesome. I didn't waste any time really... told her how much I appreciated Saturday's session and how one of her questions (when did I lose my self esteem, which wasn't exactly the right question) led me to another question (when did I lose my self respect, which was the right question) that I answered at the concert Sunday night (I lost it back in mid-June when we talked about my sexuality and I put up all kindsa walls about it and then quit at the end of June so as to run away from talking about it any further among other reasons) and then I told her about the song Silent Legacy making me cry and and and and then I just couldn't stand it anymore and I said it. I totally came out to her. (removed-too much detail!!)

She was SO happy for me. We had a really lovely conversation about it after I said all that.

I may not leave all of this here for very long lol (yep - took out a chunk)

Sounds like you had a good session, Artie.

Just curious (and feel free not to answer if it's too personal), but are you married to a man now?

Oh, so it was a light session with no deep work...

ETA: I’m curious though...didn’t this whole thing start because you had a dream about your lesbian sister? Were your parents OK with her but not you?

Yes. We shall see how all of this plays out going forward.

haha very funny!

And it has been coming up off and on, on a pretty regular basis, ever since year 1 when I first told her about J. She never outright asked the question until mid June of this year though when I had that dream about my sister you mentioned. It's been a looooong process of getting myself to realize this. But damn. It's true. It's so freakin' true. It's like a thousand ton weight has lifted offa me.

eta: no, they were not ok with my sister. not at all. they started tolerating it when she had her daughter, because, well, a granddaughter. Of course my dad referred to her as his 'half granddaughter' when she wasn't around. he could be an ignorant SOB. As long as my sister came by herself with her daughter, and didn't bring her wife, they lived with it because they didn't have to see it and could pretend.

And we did some work with the dream I had last night, which might just have been the dream I have waited so long for. But more on that later.

That's awesome, Art. Sounds like a great session. (not quoting in case you choose to delete).

Thank you, it was really great. I appreciate you not quoting cuz I already went in and took out a chunk as I was overzealous with details. I don't know how you do it LT, put yourself out there so bravely when you post about your sessions. I tried, and I couldn't stand it!! You're a much braver woman than I!!

Una — you did not fail the marshmallow test.

In the article, tack on emotional support available to a child (and not just the financial and social support they talk about) and things start to look a lot different.

Wow, that was a rather limited sample in the original besides.

Couchies, I might be speaking as a "person with lived experiences of mental health issues" to small groups of hospital staff in an event my T is organising. She said she thought very carefully and only asked 3 of us on her huge caseload.
I've also contacted potential interested people who can then contact her if they wish to participate. I have pretty bad social anxiety lol, I don't know if I'm capable. I'll be going with a friend with experience with such events (a "we go as a pair!" thing because my friend knows about my anxiety and suggested), but we'll be interacting with different groups.

Wow QM that sounds like a huge thing to do good luck you can do this.

that is so amazing of you to consider doing that!

Well couchies I'm heading to bed, thanks for being here for me to share with this evening.


and head nods of course if you don't do group hugs!

Thanks BCM and Artie. I'm hoping my hopefully decent writing expressiveness translate to speaking expressiveness haha. I asked her why she asked me because I was so stunned. Apparently my passion for advocacy is reeeeaaaally obvious to her. And to my local friends wow. I had friends I asked if they're interested because they've experience doing events like this and they said they're too busy and "you do it, you can do it!" which is amazing to me but also terrifying!

There's therapeutic reasons as well because of my social anxiety though she made clear she's not pressuring me. I told her it's my values vs my fears! I'm reminding myself that I've done presentations of art projects in school before in front of like 20 critical classmates when I was an older teen... It can't be as terrible as that, right?

I shot wide awake at 3am and couldn't go back to sleep due to sheer "Wtf QM??!!" anxiety and a mind churning with all my insecurities lol!

The Fall just taught me the French for the number before 70.

well it ain't called the boob tube for nothin'!

(i know i know good night, artie.....)

Okay...I read that and assumed it was una posting before I looked over at the username.

She’s a baleful influence.

yeah, ain't it great?!