Going to see male pdoc on Friday....

and I'm scared spitless. Some of you may remember that I have had the unusual experience of being sexually assaulted by a male pdoc. Well, this has made me seek out only female providers, of any kind.

I wouldn't be going at all except that my internist who prescribes my AD doesn't know how to prescribe psych meds and always asks me what I "want" in the way of meds. Well, long story short, I don't want to be my own prescriber. You've heard the saying a "man who has himself as an attorney has a fool for an attorney." Well, double that for a doctor!

My appt is on Friday with this guy. Should I tell him my history? It will just make him nervous and won't do anything for me? He'll most likely feel like keeping his door open so the receptionist can "verify" that all is kept very professional. Maybe he'll even think that his profession is beyond reproach and that I'm lying? I dunno...I remembered when I posted just a little of my experience here and it caused a riot. People just don't like to think that those in the helping profession can be unethical. I get it.

Maybe I should take somebody with me? But, then, it would have to be someone who knows everything about me and there isn't a person like that on the planet.

Any words of wisdom for me?
Much appreciated.
Okie

In my humble opinion, I don't see why it's anyone elses business WHY you might have left your other pdoc. If the question comes up, tell the new guy, "There were some ethical concerns that I couldn't abide." Simple, concise, and also lets him know that you expect things to be on the up and up. You aren't looking for a confidant, a friend, or a therapist. You want him to manage your medication. All he needs to know is your medical history, what meds you've taken, any dx'es that are pertinent, etc.

I think you should do whatever makes you feel the most comfortable. I don't think telling him will put him off at all, I think he will be sad this happened to you and very compassionate about it. I don't think he would think you would have any reason to lie about something like that.

Taking someone with you to be out there waiting for you, nearby, could be comforting and a great idea.

(( okie ))

Maybe you could tell somebody close to you that going to new doctors makes you uncomfortable and ask if they would mind going with you.

tulips

okie,

i'm sorry that happened to you. i can understand why you would be so anxious to see a male pdoc.

i find any kind of appointment with a doctor hard. i've started to let a friend know when i have an appointment - pdoc or otherwise - and set up a time to call her after the appointment. it's been helpful just to know that i have someone to check in with post appt. you don't even have to go into the details of the appt if you don't want to. you can just let someone know that appts are hard for you. normally i'm able to chat a bit about it and then go about my day. (i used to not be able to go into work or do anything other than crawl under the covers after a doc appt)

i haven't asked my t to fill this role, but if i didn't have a friend available after an appt i would seriously consider asking her. she likes that i've set up this system with a friend.

i'm wishing you the best.

Okie, I'm stating something you've addressed in earlier threads.
Are there any female pdocs you can go to? Because of your experience, you may want to share it with your new pdoc and ask for a referral to a female. Pdocs (the good ones) have our best interests in mind and would probably do as you ask.
I wish you well.

I would probably tell him, and then he might understand, and reassure you. Help you try and get over the issue, so that you guys can have a healthy relationship.

Good luck

i believe you, and that people in these professions are as capable as any other segment of society of committing such a horrid act. i hope that the ratios are better somehow..

i am so sorry this happened to you.

this is a tough question... i couldn't possibly in a million years guess how you must feel now. i would think that is the key, how do you feel now?

personally though? i would tell him, and as upfront as possible, but not in an emotional or detailed sense... how he reacted would tell me if i could work with him. Otherwise i think i would go to every session feeling it looming over me like a huge secret... and i discovered that in my first few therapy appts i could just prattle off painful events without the pain, then, once T got to know me and he mattered i wasn't able to tell him those things. So, if i had it to do over i would have given him a more complete list while i didn't care what he thought. BUT that is just me.

i wish you luck and good wishes...

Personally, I would not tell him.... he is a pdoc... and most likely you are not going to get any therapy from him... so no reason to tell him... he is there to evaluate you for meds... though being nervous and triggerred you might not get an accurate assesment... though if you tell him.. my opinion.. he will be focused on what you just told him.. and probably would not get an accurate assesment either..

I don't believe that the psych.. nor medical community - either one is ready to hear about one of their own..

When a surgeon... "botched" a surgery 12 years ago... it was difficult for me to get any type of follow-up care to fix the "botch"... really and I wasn't complaining... I just needed a dr.. that was not the original's speciality... and it was very.. hard...

Don't know if the above pertains...

but that is my opinion...

and (((hugs))).... we.. all my alters are there with you... holding your hand.. I hope.. that will help... we are there in spirit...