Couch 213: The Tulip couch

LostOnTheTrail · Apr 10, 2020, 12:20 PM

The email wasn't just the song link - I also wanted to share an article published just as the pandemic was becoming a nuisance in the UK.

atisketatasket · Apr 10, 2020, 12:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

Yay me! I volunteered my technical expertise to the covid cause.

You’re so old you know COBOL?

LonesomeTonight · Apr 10, 2020, 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LostOnTheTrail

Discussed the recent passing of one of my favourite musicians as part of today's therapy session. On a scale of 1-10, how weird is it that I've just sent R a link to one of his songs?

It was a song that meant a lot to me in the early days of unravelling my experience, but not really feeling able to tell anyone about it.

Not weird, I mean, I played a song for mine in session once. I've sent him a couple links before, too, but he never commented on them (not even to say "got it, will listen later.") So haven't sent any more. Your T seems like she'd be open to it. I've thought about playing something else for T, but not sure the best way to approach it over Zoom?

I was trying to explain one to him today that's actually about a romantic breakup, but that feels very fitting in terms of what we've all had to give up due to Covid. About learning to live with the

. Lines like "But I'm learning to lie here in the quiet light While I watch the sky go from black to gray...Learning how not to cry Every time there's another sad unbearable morning But sometimes there's nothing I can do."

stopdog · Apr 10, 2020, 12:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

Yay me! I volunteered my technical expertise to the covid cause.

Great - what are you doing?

Lemoncake · Apr 10, 2020, 12:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScarletPimpernel

No, I didn't get to talk about my concerns at all. Bit she did say she believes we will work everything out. It's jard when you have no answers, no response. You're just sitting with these hurts and the person who has to make the next move puts it off.

I have a 20min phone session with her at 9am. Then I have video session with her at 1:30pm. Supposedly, we're going to talk about my concerns during the phone call. But I still think it was unfair to make me wait. I don't understand why she just couldn't do back to back 20mins phone session without me paying her. Especially since the first 20mins was me reassuring her.

I do not know if the hurts will be resolved. She says it will be. If I base it off the past, then yes it will be resolved. But while in the thick of it, I'm just not sure. It isn't a no, but it isn't a yes yet.

How did your session go ?

Back to back 20 mins would almost be a full session. It might have been harder to fit in.

Is the gap between the call and session time to let you think? Haven't seen it before.

LonesomeTonight · Apr 10, 2020, 12:51 PM

I thought about a screenshot today but was too nervous about getting caught and didn't want to risk it. Felt connected, didn't want to potentially threaten that in any way.

unaluna · Apr 10, 2020, 12:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

You’re so old you know COBOL?

LOL are you outing me?! We will see how desperate for help they are. Or if people are just looking to profit.

unaluna · Apr 10, 2020, 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

Great - what are you doing?

Doing? Doing? Shirley you jest. Waiting for them to call me.

SlumberKitty · Apr 10, 2020, 01:43 PM

Only three people are at work today, myself included. The phones have hardly rang. Nothing is going on. I paid some bills and did some invoicing. Now I am just like, hmmm. This is not good. I'm not in a good headspace.

LonesomeTonight · Apr 10, 2020, 01:52 PM

Here's a good analogy for a few of you, including @@: I was talking today about wishing I had some sense of when this would all end. Dr. T said it's like being in the 5th inning of a baseball game, but not knowing how many innings there will be. That seemed to fit, and I referenced it later in the session.

stopdog · Apr 10, 2020, 01:58 PM

In my jurisdiction, back when I did business reorg bankruptcy work, there was a judge who used baseball analogies for everything. He was a giant asshole jerkwad in general and his male-centric analogies used to test my diplomacy skills.

atisketatasket · Apr 10, 2020, 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Here's a good analogy for a few of you, including @@: I was talking today about wishing I had some sense of when this would all end. Dr. T said it's like being in the 5th inning of a baseball game, but not knowing how many innings there will be. That seemed to fit, and I referenced it later in the session.

That is the great thing about baseball. Less so about pandemics.

LonesomeTonight · Apr 10, 2020, 02:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

That is the great thing about baseball. Less so about pandemics.

Yeah, I used to be more of a baseball fan (before my team sucked for a really long time) and then became a football fan. With a baseball game, it could be 11-3 at the bottom of the 9th, 2 outs, and the home team could still potentially come back to win. In a football game, if it's, say, 28-7 at the 2-minute warning in the 4th quarter, there's really no way, barring something truly ridiculous, for the home team to come back and win.

SheHulk07 · Apr 10, 2020, 03:34 PM

I'm really frustrated with technology today. Session with T1 had to be turned to a phone session because the connection was bad for video. I told him phone was my least favorite way to do therapy and he agreed that in person is our first choice to feel more connected and not distracted. I kind of wish I didn't even talk to him today after dealing with the phone. He mentioned IOP again and I said that spending 3 hours a day doing group therapy feels discouraging and frustrating with all the technology issues happening. I reached out to a place that he suggested over a month ago that I've been trying to get connected with and haven't heard back.
H and I are supposed to try tele couples therapy today and haven't even received a link yet.
I'm ready to throw in the towel with therapy during this pandemic.

Salmon77 · 04:43 PM

So, in the grand tradition of googling your T and finding out something you wish you didn't: I googled mine and found somebody had thanked him in their book. I googled the author of the book and found their twitter, where they had written about seeing their therapist and his office. Based on the details I am pretty sure their T is also my T. I feel kinda weird about knowing who one of his other clients is. Hopefully I can forget about it before my next session so I don't have to talk about it.

ETA of course now I'm also feeling inferior that this other client has a book out and all that.

Salmon77 · Apr 10, 2020, 03:45 PM

Quote:

He mentioned IOP again and I said that spending 3 hours a day doing group therapy feels discouraging and frustrating with all the technology issues happening.

I'm curious how that would even work right now. All via Zoom or what?

SheHulk07 · Apr 10, 2020, 04:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Salmon77

I'm curious how that would even work right now. All via Zoom or what?

Yes, that's how it was explained to me. All through whatever platform they use with a 5-10 break between the groups.

Polibeth · Apr 10, 2020, 05:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Yeah, I used to be more of a baseball fan (before my team sucked for a really long time) and then became a football fan. With a baseball game, it could be 11-3 at the bottom of the 9th, 2 outs, and the home team could still potentially come back to win. In a football game, if it's, say, 28-7 at the 2-minute warning in the 4th quarter, there's really no way, barring something truly ridiculous, for the home team to come back and win.

I'm a huge sports fan - but mostly a baseball fan (I even have a team tattoo) - this is a good analogy.

My co-workers had one of the ESPN channels on a few weeks ago and there were no professional sports so they showed Dodgeball and Marble Racing. I'm not that big of a sports fan!

LonesomeTonight · Apr 10, 2020, 05:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Polibeth

I'm a huge sports fan - but mostly a baseball fan (I even have a team tattoo) - this is a good analogy.

My co-workers had one of the ESPN channels on a few weeks ago and there were no professional sports so they showed Dodgeball and Marble Racing. I'm not that big of a sports fan!

Marble racing? Now I'm curious about that!

ElectricManatee · Apr 10, 2020, 05:25 PM

Wow, marble racing. I didn't know what it was until just now, but that's an internet K-hole I could fall into for at least an hour...

stopdog · Apr 10, 2020, 05:35 PM

My mother adored sports and games of all sorts. Sometimes I would catch her watching things like the little league world series or high school lacrosse matches when no professional or college sports were on.
I wonder if I was adopted.

There are a lot of articles out now about soap. I am a bar soap sort of person by default, but I am finding a lot of people who are really hostile to bar soap. I am surprised by the incredibly strong opinions people hold about their chosen soap medium.

Polibeth · Apr 10, 2020, 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Marble racing? Now I'm curious about that!

Literally it was watching groups of marbles "race" through obstacles.

And there was a guy "announcing" the races - "the jazzy raspberries just completed tornado alley and are racing towards the Falls ..... will the blue diamonds catch up"...

Polibeth · Apr 10, 2020, 05:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ElectricManatee

Wow, marble racing. I didn't know what it was until just now, but that's an internet K-hole I could fall into for at least an hour...

Yep - this was the thing. So stupid that you can't help but keep watching!!

unaluna · Apr 10, 2020, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

There are a lot of articles out now about soap. I am a bar soap sort of person by default, but I am finding a lot of people who are really hostile to bar soap. I am surprised by the incredibly strong opinions people hold about their chosen soap medium.

I blame Friends for poisoning the minds of the younger generations against bar soap. Joey said soap was clean by definition because it's soap. I believe it was his roommate Chandler who told him what he washed last in the shower, so what did the next user of the bar wash first?

atisketatasket · Apr 10, 2020, 06:38 PM

I don't like bar soap because it's slippery and also inflexible, while body wash or hand soap isn't. And when bar soap gets down to little bits it's all but useless. (My parents would stick the little bits together until they had enough for a regular-size bar of soap.)

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