Couch 221: Definitely Spam!

Thanks, @@--I appreciate your perspective, as always.

The problem is that I really do like his personality and I'm not like 100% sure that I can't see myself with him. I'm going to give him one more shot and then make the call. I don't want to hurt him (or waste my time), but I don't think three dates is enough for a person to get too attached or hopeful or whatnot.

Having erotic feelings for a T is okay and doesn't make you dirty, Same with any fantasies you may have.

I came across this quote that seemed like an Oprah ah ha moment. "We accept the love we think we deserve". If this was your friend what would you tell her?

You generally seem to like hiking and camping a lot.It's okay to want to find someone who could enjoy that level of activity with you too.

Mornin' couch. I'm working only 2 days next week Sun & Mon woo hoo! I took vacation tues and wed and then i'm off for thanksgiving on thursday, and i'm always off on fridays and saturdays anyway, so I have a 5 day weekend. Nice. I plan to do some crocheting and to spend some time doing homework. I think I'm going to schedule myself blocks of time to do different things so I don't just sit around and play on the computer and watch TV instead of doing the things I want to do!

trying to make myself work on this week's 400 word essay right now but yeesh. not in the mood!! we have to read a journal article, a science daily article, and 2 dazeddigital.com articles all about selfies and narcissism and then write the essay on our "findings". have I said that I am so over this class?!


(i know i know "artie it's kinda hard to focus on homework when you have 3 other tabs open on your browser that are completely unrelated. close the unrelated tabs and get to work." thanks! hahaha)

Today is a big day for me. so I texted T and let her know. Because she always asks me every session, how many days it is? And then she says some words of encouragement, even though some of the words I wouldn't really use like, "Hot D****" So I texted her today and she said "I am bursting with pleasure and happiness for you." And sent pictures of a heart, balloons that say celebrate every tiny victory, fireworks, and two men dancing some kind of tap dance in tandem. Made me feel good and special.

I also pretty much texted all of my friends and my former T too.

It wasnt these guys, was it?

Nope, but thanks for the laugh!

Congrats, Kit! That’s quite an accomplishment. And really sweet what your T said.

Congrats Kit! You're doing great!

The more I talk to Dr. T about H, the more I realize how badly ex-MC did with our marriage counseling. Like talking about some ways H has been harsh or disrespectful to me or D lately and Dr. T saying how he’d approach it if we were seeing him for marriage counseling. Hint: He would not have chalked things up to me being too sensitive and acted like everything is fine because H and I are still married so it didn’t threaten the relationship. More like saying to H “How would you feel if this were videotaped and posted to FB for everyone to see? How do you think they’d react to it?”

It meant a lot to have Dr. T say I never deserve to be spoken to in certain ways, even if I am being really annoying (that last part was my phrase). Something about his being a male authority figure likely makes it carry more weight than, say, a friend saying it. And as much as authority figure stuff can be a negative thing, maybe it’s exactly what I needed to hear from the type of person I needed to hear it from...

And we are talking about ways I can talk to H about it, including calling him out in an assertive way when it happens and what holds me back from doing that, from saying I deserve respect. And I said maybe it’s that I don’t feel I deserve respect (don’t respect myself?). So that’s something we’re going to delve into more in a future session

I don't know what I should work on first this weekend.....Addressing Christmas cards, or wrapping Presents? Probably Addressing Christmas cards! I have longer to wrap presents whereas the cards need to get out. My Dad bought 100 Christmas stamps. That should be enough!

Man, I missed those guys. Who's your new partner? Moo?

Congrats Kit! I love the response from t.

Got my paper done and submitted. I got a little annoyed at one of the dazeddigital articles we had to read they supposedly quoted a research study (i refuse to pay $14.95 to read the actual study) as saying that boomers are more narcissistic because they grew up with the "government privilege" of Social Security. Excuse me, last I checked I've been paying into that for the past 42 years since I got my first paycheck. Those two articles on dazeddigital were opinionated and about as un-scholarly as one can get. Perhaps that was the point in her including them...

Well done Kit congratulations

Thanks everyone! If you could see me today you would see me beaming from ear to ear!

Oh I would be too curious not to pay the $14.95 to read the study!

P.S. Sounds like those articles were B.S.

An hour and a half left of work. Not feeling it today!

Yeah, it is almost the weekend!

Pretty sure we will be performing at the inauguration!

Who Moo?

As a result of disclosing to my therapist, I now feel really, really, desperately bad.

Also I have to work tomorrow, and the next seven days in a row.

It was really brave of you to tell him that. I don't think I would be able to talk about that with my therapist.

I think it was really brave too, chihiro.

Friday night is Scrabble night at my house. I always lose, cuz H is way competitive and good at strategy. I think it would physically hurt him to lose haha. I did crack 250 tonight though, which felt great even though he scored 276. It's such a fun game!