[Mountaindewed]

I asked my therapist today if she was vaccinated. She refused to answer my question. She said it’s medical information that she doesn’t want to disclose. I said I just wanted to know in case I should be wearing a mask. She told me that I can wear a mask if I want to. I am vaccinated by the way.

I’ve been seeing her for awhile and I’ve always had my mask off. I assume by her somewhat hostile tone and answer today that she is not vaccinated.

I like her a lot but I think she’s pretty religious and one of those secret homophobic and transphobic people. She is switching me over to someone else in September. She said not because we don’t have a connection but because “I don’t specialize in the areas you need.”

I guess I’ll just wear my mask since we are now going to every week instead of every other week and I can’t risk getting sick. But I don’t want to do telehealth unless forced to do so.

What would you do?

[Lostislost]

Does she wear mask? I think wearing one is for the benefit of other people, she needs to be wearing one to reduce the chances of you getting sick.

I wouldn't see a T if they refused to tell me whether they were vaccinated or not, I think that's awful and you have a right to know.

I was seeing my T in person with no masks all through last year, but he was tested twice a week in his other care job and I knew we were both extremely careful.

[Mountaindewed]

Originally Posted by Lostislost

Does she wear mask? I think wearing one is for the benefit of other people, she needs to be wearing one to reduce the chances of you getting sick.

I wouldn't see a T if they refused to tell me whether they were vaccinated or not, I think that's awful and you have a right to know.

I was seeing my T in person with no masks all through last year, but he was tested twice a week in his other care job and I knew we were both extremely careful.

No she doesn’t wear a mask.

I tried asking a couple times 2 different ways but she just said she wouldn’t tell me. I don’t know if she gets regular testing but I doubt she’d tell me that either.

[velcro003]

Wow, I don’t think I could see that T in person if they wouldn’t tell you if they were vaccinated or not. It is sort of important information these days.

Both of my T’s told me they were.

[Lonelyinmyheart]

Personally I would and did last year as T continued seeing me in person throughout most of the pandemic (barring a few weeks here and there). But our circumstances are and were unique - I wasn't in much contact with anyone and neither was she at the time. Our relationship was strong, my mental health was poor and it was a decision we jointly made. No masks were worn.

It's a very personal decision and depends how worried you are about covid, your health etc. If you're happier wearing a mask then that's a good solution, especially if you'd rather not do telehealth.

I'd feel a bit uncomfortable if a T refused to tell me their vaccination status as well. Maybe she's worried about it being a political statement or something but you do have a right to know.

[Waterbear]

We met unvaccinated, when the rules allowed. It's the non disclosure part I feel a little uncomfortable with, but I guess she is within her right not too tell you. That's clearly a boundary she has set and you are free to set yours too, be that to continue or not. But yeah, I get where you are coming from in that she could just tell you, would help you to make your mind up! End of they day though, vaccinated or not you can still carry and pass on the virus...

[Nammu]

Nope, it’s not about her personal health it’s a public health issue and she’s putting her clients in danger. No way would I see a T who was so ignorant.

[NP_Complete]

I wouldn't sit in an enclosed space with anyone who wouldn't tell me their vaccination status. Depending on the circumstances, if they were unvaccinated I might stay, but I don't know. I do know that I wouldn't continue to see a therapist who refused to tell me if they were vaccinated or not. It's not like you're asking for their health history and it's directly relevant to my health. I would tell them why I refused to see them at that point also.

I also wouldn't continue to see a therapist who I thought was a closet -phobe of any sort if I fell into that particular demographic. Or just in general. I don't see how anyone with those kind of prejudices could be an effective therapist.

[Mountaindewed]

I need the support right now, even if it’s not the greatest. I just need someone to vent to. I can’t go without therapy at a time like this for me when so much is going on. So I’m just gonna hope this won’t come back and get me later. And that the new therapist contacts me soon. I was told it would be in September. I wonder if my current T will get even more annoyed if I have a mask on next week. Maybe I’ll come in with my N95 on just to annoy her.

Man why do I always get the ****ed up therapists. 3rd one in a row.

[stopdog]

It is not the client's job to protect the therapist. If she doesn't wear a mask and if the client is vaccinated - I would not worry about it. I would not see one if I was not vaccinated and didn't know if they had been. She gets to be an idiot (if she is not wearing a mask and is in person -then the assumption I would make is that she is not considering herself vulnerable) if she wants and it is not the client's job to protect a therapist from anything let alone their own stupidity. If I needed support from a therapisty sort- I would use an online service until the other live person was assigned.
If you really want to piss her off, get a hazmat suit. I would do that.

[LonesomeTonight]

Originally Posted by velcro003

Wow, I don’t think I could see that T in person if they wouldn’t tell you if they were vaccinated or not. It is sort of important information these days.

Both of my T’s told me they were.

I agree with this. My T was very upfront about when he was getting his vaccination, though he didn't see clients in person for quite a while after that (and now he's paused in-person again, but he also only sees clients unmasked). He also would only see clients who were fully vaccinated (and his waiver said he had the right to ask for proof as well).


I personally wouldn't see a T in person right now who wouldn't tell me their vaccination status. Is virtual an option with this therapist until you can switch to the other one?

[Mountaindewed]

Part of my issue with my transference T was the video sessions and not being able to say goodbye in person. It really messed with me. I’m not having any transference with this therapist but I still think it will be hard and may cause issues. I’ll have to do virtual for at least 2 weeks in October anyways, but I’m just gonna wear my N95 on Tuesday. Not to instigate her but just for my safety. If she gets annoyed then that’s her problem.

I don’t know if virtual is an option. It was when I was out of state and switching therapists. But it’s just hard for me.

At least the first thing my last therapist said was she was vaccinated and asked if it was ok if she could take her mask off. But I left mine on since I had only had one shot. I left it on until 2 weeks after my second one.

I don’t exactly feel violated or misled by what my current therapist did. But it is unprofessional and I felt like my boundaries were crossed a bit.

[Salmon77]

Nope. Wouldn't see her in person, wouldn't see her online, wouldn't see her, period. I wouldn't respect her.

[ThunderGoddess]

I'd wear a cloth mask under an N95 mask because I'm extra and it's pretty sad someone can't just say if they're vaccinated or not. It's not like an extremely personal medical condition so I don't understand why she is making a big deal about a simple question. I'm sorry you're dealing with this, I think it's fair to feel upset.

[Echos Myron redux]

No. For the lack of vaccination and also for the refusal to disclose, because I see that as removing your right to informed consent. This is a global pandemic and I think it is basic respect to disclose if you are going to be in a confined space with someone. I would wonder, if they are not taking that seriously, what else are they not taking seriously in this pandemic, and what risk would their actions place me under. Even fully vaxxed there is a risk of illness.

[atisketatasket]

I think you’re assuming a lot, OP. That she’s unvaccinated. That she’s a closet phobe of several groups because she’s transferring you. That if she’s unvaccinated it’s not for a good reason. I’ve got several colleagues who literally either cannot get vaccinated because of medical conditions, or in the case of one, she got the first shot and had a severe allergic reaction to an ingredient and needs to wait for Novavax.

But to answer your basic question, if I knew they were unvaccinated for whatever reason but still found them helpful, I would continue seeing them, masked or virtually. Otherwise, no.

[Mountaindewed]

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

I think you’re assuming a lot, OP. That she’s unvaccinated. That she’s a closet phobe of several groups because she’s transferring you. That if she’s unvaccinated it’s not for a good reason. I’ve got several colleagues who literally either cannot get vaccinated because of medical conditions, or in the case of one, she got the first shot and had a severe allergic reaction to an ingredient and needs to wait for Novavax.

But to answer your basic question, if I knew they were unvaccinated for whatever reason but still found them helpful, I would continue seeing them, masked or virtually. Otherwise, no.

She should be wearing a mask though if not vaccinated.

[Rive.]

No, I would not see an unvaccinated T in person.

Then again, presently, I would not even see a T who *was* vaccinated.

Your T is right btw, medical information does not have to be disclosed. It is private and protected information. I don't see how her vaccination status should impact your wearing a mask or not though. It is not because one is vaccinated that one can't catch it nor transmit it...

What I do find strange is her not wearing a mask to protect her clients (then again, she may have reasons for that).

I would also not project that she was religious or homophobic or the reason she is referring you out. You don't know that for sure,

[Victoria'smom]

I'm not even going to ask. I'd kinda flip out with an answer like that. I'm going to wear my two mask and explain how nervous I am.

[ScarletPimpernel]

I would be bothered if T or L didn't tell me their vaccination status. We're all about honesty and openness, and we all feel that being transparent especially about the virus is extremely important.

I would see L or T in-person even if they haven't been vaccinated. L and I started in-person before either of us were vaccinated. We just took precautions: masks, hand sanitizers, social distancing, being cautious when needed to be in public, etc.

Even now with H's job situation, L and I are being extra cautious even though we're both vaccinated. She bought an air filter, the window will be open, we'll wear masks when within 6ft of each other, etc.

Imo, if a T isn't willing to share their status, they better act as if they have not been vaccinated (i.e. masks, etc.). Otherwise, it shows lack of seriousness and care.

[ChickenNoodleSoup]

It's her right to not disclose the information, but I'd be bothered if my T didn't tell me and got hostile over the question. Yes, it's a personal information, but so far everyone I've met talks about it. People in a store I often go to "oh, are you vaccinated yet?", I have asked my dentist whether he's vaccinated... my T disclosed getting the vaccine without me even asking.

Anyways, I'd wear a mask regardless of what her answer was. Vaccinated people still can spread the infection if they get it, so better safe than sorry. And since you'll switch in a few weeks anyways, I'd probably not dive into the topic more. If this was a permanent T, I'd honestly probably stop seeing them, not due to not being vaccinated but due to not disclosing it.

Has she asked you whether you are vaccinated? Either she has, which presents an inequality of information and reinforces a power imbalance between you, something which potentially harms the therapeutic alliance; or she hasn't, which questions how can she complete risk assessments and implement necessary public health measures if she doesn't know the vaccination status of her clients. Either way, she's screwed her integrity as far as I am concerned. I know my therapist's vaccination status and she knows mine. We sometimes meet in person outdoors with distancing (no masks), otherwise we meet online. When she returns to indoor sessions, her protocol will state that clients need to be double vaccinated (plus distancing whilst indoors). Anything less feels reckless to me, and knowing vaccination statuses is a part of the safety aspect.

[ArtleyWilkins]

Absolutely not. I am already forced into the position of teaching students face-to-face without knowing their vaccination status, students who are not required to mask, in a state that isn't required to even let me know if I have students who out on quarantine awaiting testing results. I would not see a therapist or doctor who I was aware of not being vaccinated - no matter what their reasoning. I'm vaccinated but I'm not bullet-proof. Sorry, but I spent 100 days watching my husband being tortured by Covid and I watched him die in front of my eyes. Call this the anger stage of grief perhaps, but I am beyond the point of tolerance. (Sorry, but this rant comes as I have received an email from a student who believes he has Covid, is awaiting test results, and no one in this school has bothered to inform me. Last school year, I would have known.)

[Mountaindewed]

I didn’t tell her I was vaccinated. She didn’t ask although she probably figured it out that I was after our conversation yesterday. But I just assumed that since she wasn’t wearing a mask and was doing in person sessions that she had the shot. She sees a lot of kids and has young kids herself so I guess I just always assumed that she was until I asked. Maybe I should have asked sooner.

[MobiusPsyche]

She does not need to tell me the reason why she is not vaccinated...THAT could include personal health information that, as a client, I have no right to know. Not do I have a right to know the reason of it is a political or other type of reason behind her decision not to receive the vaccination.

However, I most certainly have a right to know whether the person I am meeting with in an enclosed space for fifty minutes is or is not vaccinated! I must have this information in order to make an informed decision about whether I want to even engage in that meeting or not. If it were me, I would not do so, masked or not.

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