Couch 238: Appreciating Small Progress Couch

comrademoomoo · Jun 27, 2022 at 01:01 PM

My therapist ended my therapy this weekend. Via email. With no notice and no further contact. Her explanation is that "she needs to take time off". We were deep into work about childhood sexual abuse, abandonment and traumatic attachment. The irony would be funny if I could laugh. I feel gut-punched. She's always been tricky, sometimes unprofessional, and our relationship has been characterised by ruptures, but this feels, I don't know. I am shocked.

I have read many people's experiences of sudden termination (including on here) where they assumed it wouldn't happen to them. I assumed it wouldn't happen to me.

SlumberKitty · Jun 27, 2022 at 01:03 PM

HUGS comrademoomoo. I'm so sorry your therapist ended therapy with you by email no less. That's really crappy and I'm really sorry it happened. Feel free to talk here if you want. I'm listening. HUG kit

comrademoomoo · Jun 27, 2022 at 01:51 PM

Thank you SlumberKitty.

ArtieTheSequal · Jun 27, 2022 at 02:12 PM

Hugs, comrademoomoo. I'm so very sorry, it's just awful that this can and does happen. it's bad enough if they do it in person but omg in an email? that is such a crappy thing to do.

comrademoomoo · Jun 27, 2022 at 02:18 PM

I have encountered her coldness before, but this is brutal. We had worked together for five and a half years.

unaluna · Jun 27, 2022 at 03:45 PM

Thats a bona fide crazy person. Im sorry moo.

Seems like there should be repercussions for her.

Holy carp.

comrademoomoo · Jun 27, 2022 at 04:04 PM

Thank you una. Do you have an associate mob of repercussers who could pay her a visit?

atisketatasket · Jun 27, 2022 at 04:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by comrademoomoo

Thank you una. Do you have an associate mob of repercussers who could pay her a visit?

If she doesn't, I volunteer. *grabs flaming torch and pitchfork*

She's old, right? Piece of cake.

East17 · Jun 27, 2022 at 04:29 PM

I'm so sorry comrademoomoo, that's abysmal. I had a T end nearly 5 years work by text once, which was a hell of a shock, but we had reached a point where we were only meeting occasionally. Even if you've had a difficult therapy relationship, no one deserves to be dumped like that, and especially not in the midst of trauma work. Can totally understand why you would feel gut punched.

Sent from my SM-A526B using Tapatalk

LonesomeTonight · Jun 27, 2022 at 04:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by comrademoomoo

My therapist ended my therapy this weekend. Via email. With no notice and no further contact. Her explanation is that "she needs to take time off". We were deep into work about childhood sexual abuse, abandonment and traumatic attachment. The irony would be funny if I could laugh. I feel gut-punched. She's always been tricky, sometimes unprofessional, and our relationship has been characterised by ruptures, but this feels, I don't know. I am shocked.

I have read many people's experiences of sudden termination (including on here) where they assumed it wouldn't happen to them. I assumed it wouldn't happen to me.

I'm so sorry....that's really awful for her to do that over email with no explanation when you were in the middle of that sort of work. If it were an illness or sick family member, something like that, you'd think she would have told you. Did it sound permanent?

Hugs, if wanted.

comrademoomoo · Jun 27, 2022 at 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

If she doesn't, I volunteer. *grabs flaming torch and pitchfork*

She's old, right? Piece of cake.

The couch has so many heroes!

comrademoomoo · Jun 27, 2022 at 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by East17

I'm so sorry comrademoomoo, that's abysmal. I had a T end nearly 5 years work by text once, which was a hell of a shock, but we had reached a point where we were only meeting occasionally. Even if you've had a difficult therapy relationship, no one deserves to be dumped like that, and especially not in the midst of trauma work. Can totally understand why you would feel gut punched.

Sent from my SM-A526B using Tapatalk

Via text! That's beyond harsh. I can relate to your shock. It's also the powerlessness. How can you process anything with a text or email?! Such cowardice and disrespect

comrademoomoo · Jun 27, 2022 at 05:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

I'm so sorry....that's really awful for her to do that over email with no explanation when you were in the middle of that sort of work. If it were an illness or sick family member, something like that, you'd think she would have told you. Did it sound permanent?

Hugs, if wanted.

It is not clear whether it is permanent. She gave me a referral so I can work with someone to support me with the ending. She said she was sorry to let me know in this way. She was very clear that we can't have contact now. She also said she would be in touch in a few months, but I don't believe this. Even if she intends to be in touch in a few months, how can I trust her again?

She took a short time off last year when she had a family bereavement but she explained and gave me context. This feels very different. Also, her counselling directory profile is still active and showing that she is accepting new clients so I don't believe her generic explanation about needing time off.

unaluna · Jun 27, 2022 at 06:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by comrademoomoo

The couch has so many heroes!

We go anywhere for cake.

NP_Complete · Jun 27, 2022 at 08:22 PM

I would be devastated if my therapist dumped me out of the blue like that. I certainly was when he was giving me several months warning. I'm sorry you're dealing with this comrade. Do you think you have it in you to try with someone else at this point?

atisketatasket · Jun 27, 2022 at 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

We go anywhere for cake.

You are such a cheap date.

We go anywhere for a five-course dinner with a nice Beaujolais.

And then cake.

All gluten-free, of course.

ElectricManatee · Jun 27, 2022 at 10:13 PM

I'm so sorry, comrade. She seemed to offer you a place and relationship where you could get some real inner work done, and the loss of that must be profoundly painful. Your relationship matters to both you and her, and you deserved a different and better ending, if that's what this is.

Quietmind 2 · Jun 28, 2022 at 12:37 AM

Hugs if wanted, CNS

Quietmind 2 · Jun 28, 2022 at 12:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LostOnTheTrail

I cannot believe how difficult Amazon make it to get in contact with a human being. I've written an email about my book experience and the steps I would like them to take, but I have no way of actually getting it to them.

Somehow I need to reach the people who write the policies.

Mega corporations make it really difficult, and sometimes having a post go viral or tweeting senior management works, if nothing else.

Quietmind 2 · Jun 28, 2022 at 12:42 AM

Wow at your T, comrademoomoo. I'm so sorry. She couldn't even tell you face to face... and right in the middle of such difficult and delicate work too. It's abandonment, isn't it? Please keep posting here if it helps.

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SlumberKitty Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jul 2018 Location: CA Posts: 27,329 (SuperPoster!) 5 117.7k hugs given	Jun 27, 2022 at 01:03 PM #242 HUGS comrademoomoo. I'm so sorry your therapist ended therapy with you by email no less. That's really crappy and I'm really sorry it happened. Feel free to talk here if you want. I'm listening. HUG kit __________________ Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA
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comrademoomoo Grand Poohbah Member Since Feb 2019 Location: Toodlepip Posts: 1,737 5	Jun 27, 2022 at 01:51 PM #243 Thank you SlumberKitty.
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ArtieTheSequal Writing my way through... Member Since Feb 2020 Location: In the desert Posts: 7,339 (SuperPoster!) 4 5,820 hugs given	Jun 27, 2022 at 02:12 PM #244 Hugs, comrademoomoo. I'm so very sorry, it's just awful that this can and does happen. it's bad enough if they do it in person but omg in an email? that is such a crappy thing to do.
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comrademoomoo Grand Poohbah Member Since Feb 2019 Location: Toodlepip Posts: 1,737 5	Jun 27, 2022 at 02:18 PM #245 I have encountered her coldness before, but this is brutal. We had worked together for five and a half years.
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unaluna Elder Harridan x-hankster Member Since Jun 2011 Location: Milan/Michigan Posts: 40,106 (SuperPoster!) 12 66.9k hugs given	Jun 27, 2022 at 03:45 PM #246 Thats a bona fide crazy person. Im sorry moo. Seems like there should be repercussions for her. Holy carp.
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comrademoomoo Grand Poohbah Member Since Feb 2019 Location: Toodlepip Posts: 1,737 5	Jun 27, 2022 at 04:04 PM #247 Thank you una. Do you have an associate mob of repercussers who could pay her a visit?
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NP_Complete Grand Magnate Member Since Feb 2017 Location: the upside down Posts: 3,824 7 6,365 hugs given	Jun 27, 2022 at 08:22 PM #255 I would be devastated if my therapist dumped me out of the blue like that. I certainly was when he was giving me several months warning. I'm sorry you're dealing with this comrade. Do you think you have it in you to try with someone else at this point?
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ElectricManatee Magnate Member Since May 2017 Location: Earth Posts: 2,515 7 4,704 hugs given	Jun 27, 2022 at 10:13 PM #257 I'm so sorry, comrade. She seemed to offer you a place and relationship where you could get some real inner work done, and the loss of that must be profoundly painful. Your relationship matters to both you and her, and you deserved a different and better ending, if that's what this is.
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Quietmind 2 Poohbah Member Since Jan 2020 Location: Somewhere I'm working to leave Posts: 1,243 4 8 hugs given	Jun 28, 2022 at 12:37 AM #258 Hugs if wanted, CNS
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Quietmind 2 Poohbah Member Since Jan 2020 Location: Somewhere I'm working to leave Posts: 1,243 4 8 hugs given	Jun 28, 2022 at 12:42 AM #260 Wow at your T, comrademoomoo. I'm so sorry. She couldn't even tell you face to face... and right in the middle of such difficult and delicate work too. It's abandonment, isn't it? Please keep posting here if it helps.
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